You guys are some of the first that I have ever heard respond this way. I agree with you, however I think that a lot of people say it wouldn't be cheating because they think of it in a fantasy type way and assume they would be invited to join in. I have argued many times that it would be cheating mostly because I would never invite my husband to join in because I couldn't handle "seeing" him bang another woman. I jokingly brought up a "what if" scenario and he said he wouldn't consider it cheating. But I am pretty sure that's because he assumed he would get to join in. Boy will he be let down when he reads this. lol