I want your thoughts on this

[hamstershaver]

what do you weigh now?

 

[jenscats5]

It's a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. If you were chubby as a child & made fun of by your peers & relatives for being so, then you may see yourself as chubby -- even after you lose the weight & look a normal bodyweight.

Now, self esteem can vary widely from person to person -- so it's not necessarily an all encompassing thing.....

 

[SoKlueles]

from personal experience... I was 265lbs 9 months ago, I am down to 199 just now... still think of myself as a fatty (even though the people that knows me constantly say I don't need to diet anymore and that I lool "skinny" right now... the bastards).

Guess it takes a while for your brain to get used to your new "you", to accept it and to actually say "well, you actually are not fat anylonger"... as for room for improvement, there is ALWAYS room for improvement when it comes to physical appearance, no matter how good you look now. It is for you to decide, when you have reached your goals and set new ones... this is a never ending story

Do you think that everyones self esteem is lower than they would like it to be? Do you think its an act when someone has a "im a perfect 10" attitude?

 

[nycgirl]

so in your opinion, they do have high self esteem?
I dont think so. I think that if a woman is that secure with herself she already knows it and doesnt need reassurance from a male. I giggle and snort and stuff when i get compliments from men, but i have low self esteem and i also turn beet red too. I dont know how to handle the situation because I was obese most of my life and was told this on a regular basis.

I totally disagree. I don't know, I giggle at everything, so maybe that is just me. And sometimes things make me blush. It isn't about reassurance all the time.

 

[Cutiebaby]

Do you think that the way a person is treated at home is part of it? Noo dont get me wrong, im not saying that your hubby degrades you and stuff. ive seen your pic, you are not fat.....but theres always something do u agree, that keeps our esteems down.
I even had an uncle that would call me fat when i was a kid.......you always remember these things.

it could be that...my hubby constantly tells me that a am pretty and such but my esteem has always been not as high as it should be.i was never called fat as a kid....deep down i have an idea as to where my low esteem comes from...maybe it is some thing all girls go through who knows

 

[SoKlueles]

it could be that...my hubby constantly tells me that a am pretty and such but my esteem has always been not as high as it should be.i was never called fat as a kid....deep down i have an idea as to where my low esteem comes from...maybe it is some thing all girls go through who knows

I agree. I believe that women have a certain stigma that they are supposed to be rail thin, have perfect hair, everything..
I think part of why I dont put a pic on EF is because my self esteem sucks and i couldnt take any criticism, even if it is constructive.

 

[nycgirl]

I think part of why I dont put a pic on EF is because my self esteem sucks and i couldnt take any criticism, even if it is constructive.

This I can relate to. Actually, posting my pics have helped me alot. I posted progress pics (when I was at my worse and recent progress pics) not just face pics It was hard at first, but then after I received compliments/comments (even constructive), I realized how stupid I was being about the posting pics.

 

[Cutiebaby]

I agree. I believe that women have a certain stigma that they are supposed to be rail thin, have perfect hair, everything..
I think part of why I dont put a pic on EF is because my self esteem sucks and i couldnt take any criticism, even if it is constructive.

see i didnt really care about posting a pic here i am not going to see these people...they are not that mean here...i seen a pic recently that was horrible and no one critisized about it.....any how yes i feel the same way...but what really matters is what is on the inside......and girls often forget this.and they care more about there looks and such

 

[SoKlueles]

This I can relate to. Actually, posting my pics have helped me alot. I posted progress pics (when I was at my worse and recent progress pics) not just face pics It was hard at first, but then after I received compliments/comments (even constructive), I realized how stupid I was being about the posting pics.

of course your self esteem is going to get higher when you lose bf and weight. Im talking about total self esteem. I think that someone that has total self esteem would not need reassurance from strangers to tell them they look hot.
They should already know this.

 

[HiDnGoD]

I think if a person loses weight their self esteem may rise a little, but deep down they still think of themselves as worthless. I was always shy & had low self esteem, not sure why. Around 20 Y.O. I started to change. It is a long process for me. Reading self help books helped. I think a lot of people have low self esteem, whether it is apparent or not. I have always been fat. I'm solid & strong though, so I don't see myself as fat. Whenever I look in the mirror & see myself it's like, "Fuck, what happened to you?"
What people need to realize is:
A. You weren't born perfect. Life takes practice.
B. Everyone else is just as as fucked up as you think you are. Most more so.
C. Those that don't fit into B. are either very blessed, or have worked to overcome.
D. This may sound really hokey but, hatred & prejudice will not allow you to overcome. Until you accept others' faults/flaws, you cannot accept yourself.