I feel like everyone is selfish....

[lartinos]

And just totally out for themselves. Other than my step-father and maybe my one friend who lives out of state I really don't trust anyone. I'm talking about friends, co-workers, family whoever. I can think of examples for each very easily. And even if you gave them a lie detector they would probably pass it because they aren't even aware of their selfish ways. Maybe they would, I don't know. Am I some high and mighty individual that has never made a mistake and done something for myself? I just feel like I have learned from my mistakes and that I have a conscience and couldn't knowingly make those same decisions again. It isn't one example that makes me feel this way, it's more of cumulative thing I have just recently noticed to be more and more evident.

 

[lartinos]

Bad night for this thread, too many one worders on tonite. Maybe I'll bump it tomorrow.

 

[Metaltn]

It's just human nature I believe. If you ever notice, most people like to turn conversations to themselves without even knowing it.

Sometimes, especially in todays world, you just have to look out for number one; yourself.

 

[lartinos]

It's just human nature I believe. If you ever notice, most people like to turn conversations to themselves without even knowing it.

Sometimes, especially in todays world, you just have to look out for number one; yourself.

I'm the first person to dominate a conversation, doesn't mean I'm selfish. But at the same time I see what you mean, because I can back down and let someone have their peace. Some people I knwo who are very selfish can never not get their way in anything they do only to their own personal detriment.

 

[nimbus]

do you think anybody would give money to charity if it didn't make them feel good, or if they didn't feel guilty about not doing so?

 

[lartinos]

do you think anybody would give money to charity if it didn't make them feel good, or if they didn't feel guilty about not doing so?

yes i do, I'm never happy to give money to charity. The people are who are happy (most people) are the ones you speak of. Handing that money away make sme feel like shit more than anything. I take a small bit of solace in that the fact that the money wasn't burned, but not much at all! lol
Some would call me a scumbag, but I'm just honest. The real people who are scum are the people you speak of.

 

[Creepusmaximus]

And just totally out for themselves. Other than my step-father and maybe my one friend who lives out of state I really don't trust anyone. I'm talking about friends, co-workers, family whoever. I can think of examples for each very easily. And even if you gave them a lie detector they would probably pass it because they aren't even aware of their selfish ways. Maybe they would, I don't know. Am I some high and mighty individual that has never made a mistake and done something for myself? I just feel like I have learned from my mistakes and that I have a conscience and couldn't knowingly make those same decisions again. It isn't one example that makes me feel this way, it's more of cumulative thing I have just recently noticed to be more and more evident.

You're a free loader aren't you? Hell my sister in law doesn't like me because she wants me to "share". If I simply cut her a check every month she would be all right wth that.

Wait until she see my wife and I's will. Problably won't happen but I'm sure she thinks if something happened to us she would simply move into my house to take care of the kids. Of course she would be in charge of any money for the good of the kiddies. LOL> Shocker alert, not going to happen.

 

[nimbus]

yes i do, I'm never happy to give money to charity. The people are who are happy (most people) are the ones you speak of. Handing that money away make sme feel like shit more than anything. I take a small bit of solace in that the fact that the money wasn't burned, but not much at all! lol
Some would call me a scumbag, but I'm just honest. The real people who are scum are the people you speak of.

why do you give money then?

 

[lartinos]

why do you give money then?

The honest reason, it is doing well for others.
I do not do any types of charity, but when I do give I do it for the right reason. All it does is not make me feel bad about losong money. I get no joy of any kind at all. I'm sure there are people who get genuine joy too, just it is probably such a small percent of who actually give for that purpose. Most parade around and do it for honorable reasons as opposed to virtuous ones. For example there are certain celebrities who give large sums of money to charities and purposely don't want the fanfare.
It is few and far between, but does happen. I think selfishness in a way comes back to a persons mere control of their emotions.
People who are addicts are some of the most selfish people on earth. Is it there fault? Good question, that's debatable.

 

[Humble Pride]

retarted..........

 

[lartinos]

You're a free loader aren't you? Hell my sister in law doesn't like me because she wants me to "share". If I simply cut her a check every month she would be all right wth that.

Wait until she see my wife and I's will. Problably won't happen but I'm sure she thinks if something happened to us she would simply move into my house to take care of the kids. Of course she would be in charge of any money for the good of the kiddies. LOL> Shocker alert, not going to happen.

i don't get your premise bro. Then your sister is the selfish one... Not sure how I tie into this.

 

[nimbus]

The honest reason it is doing well for others.
I do not do any types of charity, but when I do give I do it for the right reason. All it does is not make me feel bad about losong money. I get no joy of any kind at all. I'm sure there are people who get genuine joy too, just it is probably such a small percent of who actually give for that purpose. Most parade around and do it for honorable reasons as opposed to virtuous ones. For example there are certain celebrities who give large sums of money to charities and purposely don't want the fanfare.
It is few and far between, but does happen. I think selfishness in a way comes back to a persons mere control of their emotions.
People who are addicts are some of the most selfish people on earth. Is it there fault? Good question, that's debatable.

so to clarify: you get no satisfaction out of helping others?

also lol @ calling your own question "good question"

 

[lartinos]

retarted..........

Thanks for the insight, very well thought out explanation like all your other posts.

 

[lartinos]

so to clarify: you get no satisfaction out of helping others?

also lol @ calling your own question "good question"

Actually I obviously get great satisfaction from good questions I come up with, lol.

Depends on how I'm helping others for me to get satisfaction. If you were about to get hit by a car and I pushed you out of the way, I would get great satisfaction out of it. (and I'd feel the opposite way if I did it for Humble Pride)
But if someone had a charity helping people in a third world country, you are correct I get no satisfaction and only do it as a fellow human being helping another out of the obligation as another human-being to another.

 

[puddlemonkey]

It's all about me!

 

[puddlemonkey]

now gimmie yer k!

 

[nimbus]

Actually I obviously get great satisfaction from good questions I come up with, lol.

Depends on how I'm helping others for me to get satisfaction. If you were about to get hit by a car and I pushed you out of the way, I would get great satisfaction out of it. (and I'd feel the opposite way if I did it for Humble Pride)
But if someone had a charity helping people in a third world country, you are correct I get no satisfaction and only do it as a fellow human being helping another out of the obligation as another human-being to another.

would you feel guilty if you didn't give any money?

 

[lartinos]

would you feel guilty if you didn't give any money?

for that cause no, but I would feel socially urged to do it by the person asking. Which may be the reason I may even give the money at all. No guilt or satisfaction for that cause at all. I may be strong minded, but do infact do things I normally wouldn't do out of social pressure. Something I think i should try not to do in the future. But, LIke I said already do not give a lot to charity. I have given numerous friend sloans though. Almost all have paid me back....... but not all!

 

[jackangel]

you should give to charity for one and only one reason: to exemplify your magnanimity and biblical greatness to the worthless hordes of disease-ridden human scum strewn around this wretched ball of mud called earth.

it's all about kindness and love.

 

[nimbus]

for that cause no, but I would feel socially urged to do it by the person asking. Which may be the reason I may even give the money at all. No guilt or satisfaction for that cause at all. I may be strong minded, but do infact do things I normally wouldn't do out of social pressure. Something I think i should try not to do in the future. But, LIke I said already do not give a lot to charity. I have given numerous friend sloans though. Almost all have paid me back....... but not all!

so if your peers put social pressure on you to NOT give money, and the people collecting were like "only losers give money, but we'll still take your donation if you want to feel good about yourself", then you probably wouldn't give money. So really you are just acting selfishly, in whatever way puts you in the best social standing. When you succumb to pressure you win the favor of others, which is beneficial. People motivated by peer pressure are still selfish

 

[layinback]

our selfishness and greed have greatly aided the propagation of our species. selfishness serves a darwinian purpose.

people are also capable of phenomenal acts of selflessness. it is up to the individual to examine their motives.

 

[walliwalibus]

May I be so selfish as to interfere with the convo going on here to say that life is great and enjoy it all.
Grab what ya can and MOVE sucka!
OH hell yeah.................. wtf lmao imo this thread ig!

 

[OMEGA]

I don't know why but your post reminds me of this Song and also character:

YouTube - The Joker: A Tribute to Heath Ledger

in the movie thats what the Joker was trying to tap into about people
............basically that society is a facade of controlled mayhem

and that when you take away the control you see Reality........


Dark Stuff...........

I believe in the fundamental GOOD though of things
it sure is hard to find though sometimes

 

[OMEGA]

YouTube - The Dark Knight - Joker Interrogation Scene

 

[JR76]

And just totally out for themselves. Other than my step-father and maybe my one friend who lives out of state I really don't trust anyone. I'm talking about friends, co-workers, family whoever. I can think of examples for each very easily. And even if you gave them a lie detector they would probably pass it because they aren't even aware of their selfish ways. Maybe they would, I don't know. Am I some high and mighty individual that has never made a mistake and done something for myself? I just feel like I have learned from my mistakes and that I have a conscience and couldn't knowingly make those same decisions again. It isn't one example that makes me feel this way, it's more of cumulative thing I have just recently noticed to be more and more evident.

Weren't you just recently rationalizing your way into sleeping with a chick a "friend" of yours, who purportedly looks up to you, is dating? If that's not the purest embodiment of selfishness, I have no fucking clue what is.

 

[Chrisco915]

so to clarify: you get no satisfaction out of helping others?

also lol @ calling your own question "good question"

Giving cash instead of volunteering one's time and services is a selfish person's way of easing their conscience. Lart dude......you are the classic example of what you say you hate. You too would pass the lie detector.

 

[lartinos]

so if your peers put social pressure on you to NOT give money, and the people collecting were like "only losers give money, but we'll still take your donation if you want to feel good about yourself", then you probably wouldn't give money. So really you are just acting selfishly, in whatever way puts you in the best social standing. When you succumb to pressure you win the favor of others, which is beneficial. People motivated by peer pressure are still selfish

sorry bro, not the definition of being selfish. Being socially manipulated and being selfish are two different things.

1. devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others.
2. characterized by or manifesting concern or care only for oneself: selfish motives.

 

[lartinos]

I don't know why but your post reminds me of this Song and also character:

YouTube - The Joker: A Tribute to Heath Ledger

in the movie thats what the Joker was trying to tap into about people
............basically that society is a facade of controlled mayhem

and that when you take away the control you see Reality........


Dark Stuff...........

I believe in the fundamental GOOD though of things
it sure is hard to find though sometimes

I gotta check that out, never saw it

 

[lartinos]

Weren't you just recently rationalizing your way into sleeping with a chick a "friend" of yours, who purportedly looks up to you, is dating? If that's not the purest embodiment of selfishness, I have no fucking clue what is.

That's not true, re-read that thread. The girl is my friend and we party together, I have had opportunities in the past to hook up with her and haven't before they went out. I stated in the thread I don't want to, but if we get real drunk I honestly don't know wtf will happen. Not sure if they even still together, they were as of a few months ago.

 

[lartinos]

Giving cash instead of volunteering one's time and services is a selfish person's way of easing their conscience. Lart dude......you are the classic example of what you say you hate. You too would pass the lie detector.

totally disagree, only person who can speak matter of factly on issues like this are character witnesses. I am confidant they would have my back. Everyone has some selfishness/negative desire within them. Those who best keep it at bay the best are a very few unfortunatley. We are speaking about mostly ridiculous examples that don't definitley translate into real selfishness.
What if someone does give to charity for selfish reasons? If that is the one major offense on their part you can make argument they are properly handling these desires within themselves. i never said I don't have these desires, we all do. It is how you recognize number one that will lessen them and dealing with whatever remains the best you can.

 

[jnevin]

Weren't you just recently rationalizing your way into sleeping with a chick a "friend" of yours, who purportedly looks up to you, is dating? If that's not the purest embodiment of selfishness, I have no fucking clue what is.

You dickhead. I was going to post this. No fucking way I'm gonna meat up with you when I go home to visit now, bish.

 

[Chrisco915]

totally disagree, only person who can speak matter of factly on issues like this are character witnesses. I am confidant they would have my back. Everyone has some selfishness/negative desire within them. Those who best keep it at bay the best are a very few unfortunatley. We are speaking about mostly ridiculous examples that don't definitley translate into real selfishness.
What if someone does give to charity for selfish reasons? If that is the one major offense on their part you can make argument they are properly handling these desires within themselves. i never said I don't have these desires, we all do. It is how you recognize number one that will lessen them and dealing with whatever remains the best you can.

Point taken and nice thought out answer. I'll agree with that.

People give to charity for tax write-off reasons every day. That IS a selfish reason. Selfless giving with no expectations is more along the lines of what I was referring to.

 

[nimbus]

sorry bro, not the definition of being selfish. Being socially manipulated and being selfish are two different things.

1. devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others.
2. characterized by or manifesting concern or care only for oneself: selfish motives.

you are taking a very narrow and closed-minded view about what it means to act in one's own interests

 

[lartinos]

you are taking a very narrow and closed-minded view about what it means to act in one's own interests

your opinion, not mine.

 

[viciousness]

people are actors and that will always b i've learned to deal with it #1 and 2# big L wasnt lying people are fake as shit until the burner gets pulled out. Dont let people mistake kindness for weakness neither

 

[lartinos]

people are actors and that will always b i've learned to deal with it #1 and 2# big L wasnt lying people are fake as shit until the burner gets pulled out. Dont let people mistake kindness for weakness neither

Big L reference, lol. I haven't listened to his stuff in awhile.

 

[viciousness]

ey its tru heres the quote i cant even belive i found it,



You got suttin' to say cough it out
'Cause cats be wantin beef
but when you pull out the heat they ready to talk it out
What is there to talk about, you was just frontin'
Now it ain't nuttin', ain't that suttin'


now what about selfish people in the gym? double edge sword haha

 

[needtogetaas]

And just totally out for themselves. Other than my step-father and maybe my one friend who lives out of state I really don't trust anyone. I'm talking about friends, co-workers, family whoever. I can think of examples for each very easily. And even if you gave them a lie detector they would probably pass it because they aren't even aware of their selfish ways. Maybe they would, I don't know. Am I some high and mighty individual that has never made a mistake and done something for myself? I just feel like I have learned from my mistakes and that I have a conscience and couldn't knowingly make those same decisions again. It isn't one example that makes me feel this way, it's more of cumulative thing I have just recently noticed to be more and more evident.

Bro its human nature for people to think about them self first. Its takes a lot of mental effort an conditioning on a daily bases to start thinking about others and putting others thoughts,need,feeling above your own.

You really have to believe in karma. You have to trust that by putting others first it makes you a better person. Do everything you can to keep your word and when you can't be honest and open with the person you gave your word to.

A mans name is his worth, and his word should be as good as gold. That is what my old man used to tell me.

You cant expect people to trust you. You have to a name that is worth something and a word that is as good as gold. You only get that by making a great effort everyday of your life. Not many people care that much about it.
People have lost site of what its worth.