Basically I had to listen to her. Which was impossible for the first few weeks. But I had to "let go". She asked for space and time.. I gave it. No more calls, no more emails, no nothing.
During that time, we both did alot of thinking and self improvement. Mainly me I'd say. I can now say that after the breakup, I am a better person for it, and I know my wrong doings and how to avoid them.
As for your girl being a bartender or waitress: Stay away or else she needs to realize that she needs to quit the job. Simple as that. Like HumanTarget said: its too easy to lure a girl away from her bf if shes in either of those positions.