GF dumped me (Long one. Sorry)

[ccc]

This sucks so bad. I know that I will get over this, I mean, the sun will come up tomarrow. And i dont mean to sound like a bitch boy. However, this time, this REALLY stings. I met this girl 5-6 months ago. The second I seen her we had a serious connection that we both felt. We started going out the next week. The connection got stronger for both of us. We didnt sleep together for maybe a month. She wanted me over her house like pracitically everyday, and to be honest, I wanted to be there too. Everything was great. SHe wanted me every Sunday to go with her to visit her parents. What can I say her parents were great to me, and made me feel so accepted. We never fought or had a cross word. She annouced to her parents on many occaisions that she wants to marry me. Any other time in my life, I would have been like LATER and ran as fast as I could. BUt this time is seemed different. I had no little voice inside me saying anything was wrong. I loved her. She was talking about having babies with me, and wanted me to shoot my wad in the love crack and everything. And again, for some reason I was not scared off by this like I have in the past. We did the both family house thing on christmas like most couples do and everything was great. Again, she told her parents she wanted to marry me.
So early last week, she woke up in the morning crying her eyes out for like 2 hours. Of course, I am like what's wrong. She was like I need space. I know what that means. I have used that one myself. I gave her 2 days then called her. On the phone, she tells me that she doesnt love me anymore. Totally out of the blue, and what makes it worse she was so frinking cold about it too. I was blown away. I asked if she found someone else and she said no. She was like just dont think about it. I didnt get it. Then she tells me that she was molested or raped (didnt give much detail). I told her that this happens, but why push me away? This happens to many people. Then she says this didnt happen. I just dont love you. I dont know what to think. To be honest even if she called me right now and recanted I couldnt go back. Things are different now. But it doesnt make this any easier. I dont get it. Have to admitt that i am feeling better just typing this shit out. I guess it is better it happened now than after we were married or had kids. So i should count my blessings. But why did she have to say all those things. And what is up with the overnight change of heart. She was in love with me one day and not the next? I dont get it. This morning was the roughest so far. I was mad at God for giving me what I always wanted then taking it back. Like he was fucking with me. But i see that was not the case. The thing that worries me is that how can I trust my own feelings ever again. I felt love from this woman. Was i wrong. I am not a stupid teenager. (I guess that I am a stupid 27 year old). which is worse Oh well, I will never understand a woman.. I would so be better off if i can just turn off this biological need to be with a woman.. Then I can just work and train. I dont have problems meeting woman, but i never feel like I did with this one. I am starting to worry that I am not capable of keeping a woman. She says I didnt do anything wrong. (i have used that one too) i just dont get it. Oh well, I will get over it. I jsut hate having to have my guard up like i probably will from now on. Thanks for allowing me to vent off like this. Sorry so long.

 

[VooDoo Lady]

Something happened that triggered this reaction. If you love her give her time to come to grips with the problrm she has. I doubt she was lying about the rape. She probably told you then wished she hadn't. Don't give up on love so easily, everyone has issues and everyone makes some very serious mistakes. You don't want to be 70 years old and wishing you had given your soul mate another chance. Never close a door, you never know who or what may come thru.

dex

 

[Love Bone]

It happens??

Please say that was just a summation of your discussion. If a girl you love tells you she was raped and your response is "This happens but why push me away", you sound very selfish, uncaring and uncompassionate. If this was your real reaction, I would be surprised if she ever talks to you again. You really should look at yourself and what you can offer a woman, not what she can offer you. Best of luck bro.

 

[TheGame2001]

Bro

Don't listen to her bro. Regardless of the bullshit she is telling you, I guarantee you she is sucking another cock already. Women are lower and dirtier than men when it comes to cheating....

oh yeah, bitch has a new bone, guaranteed.

 

[ccc]

Thanks for all your imput...... Love bone, This was just a summation, I told her that if she needs to talk to someone I'd listen. But if not me, than she should talk to someone. Probably a professional. I told her that I would even go with her if she needed me too. I feel very bad that this happened to someone I care about. But on the other hand if she doesnt want to, or is not ready to deal with it, then what would you suggest that I do? I would "hang in there" but she is pushing me away. Then again maybe TheGame2001 is right , and this was just her way of getting rid of me. Take care, thanks again

 

[Dogballs]

Re: Bro

Don't listen to her bro. Regardless of the bullshit she is telling you, I guarantee you she is sucking another cock already. Women are lower and dirtier than men when it comes to cheating....

oh yeah, bitch has a new bone, guaranteed.

ccc

dont listen to him, he just found out his girl was smoking his best friends pole. theres not one mold for them all, you cant just lable them all the same. voodoo lady has a point, give love a second chance.

 

[TheGame2001]

....

Nope my lady has not cheated but also wouldn't trust her more than any other female. All women will swallow different SeaMen

 

[Sapphire]

ccc, even though it sucks right now and it feels you can't trust your feelings, you should. Your heart is always right on, when you start to use your head and analyze is when the walls go up. Your girl sounds very upset and most likely needed to vent. Perhaps she is now feeling embarassed for keeping this secret from you...give her some time and try to be there for her as best you can. Good advice to have her speak with a pro.

BTW, don't listen to Thegame, not every woman or man for that matter is unworthy of being trusted...there are plenty of trust worthy people out there, just go with your gut. Hey, we all get burned once in a while, just gotta keep going til you get it right

 

[ccc]

TheGame2001, I am not flaming you one bit bro, but your additude is the one that I am afraid of having. Even if she is smoking another rod, I dont wnat to believe all woman are like this. I mean, at some point, when you love someone you have to trust them. But I understand that once you have been burned, it is hard not to have your guard up. I just dont want to be like that IMO. Thanks for your response.

But does the fact that she is pushing me away seem normal to anyone reading this?? Is this a normal reaction for someone that has been molested or raped? She said some very mean things to me, which of course I can forgive. We all have said things that we regret later. Should I just leave her alone for a while, and give her time to work things out? But if I do that, will she think that I dont care anymore and am moving on? Thanks.

 

[wyst]

I think it's a pretty normal reaction, if it's true. I think the best you can do is try not to be embittered, tell her that regardless of the way she has treated you you still love her, and leave the door open, if she wants to reach out to you for help or love.

But I wouldn't count on her just pulling out of it. Some people never recover from that kind of thing.

Sorry to hear about your trouble.

Wyst