Friends with Benefits

[Freak Nasty]

Anyone ever have one? How does it start? Whats the secret to getting one?

Obvious I am looking for one, but am trying to decide on how to go about it. Do I find someone who is interested in being friends first then maybe after some time put us in a situation to go further.

Is it easier to go for the benefits part first. Maybe after that friendship is like a given.

Not trying to hit any swingers clubs or get 1 night stands. I want a steady thing. Theres more to the story thats not relevant at this point, but thats what I'm looking for, but like I said am confused on the best course of action.

 

[Freak Nasty]

I'm gonna post this in the seduction thread. Its probably a better place to put it.

 

[PBR]

i hit you up over there bro. ^

 

[immortalis]

I'm gonna post this in the seduction thread. Its probably a better place to put it.

Well man, theres just too many variables to really comment on it to be honest. I mean, Do you have a "prospect"? or are you just asking in general. If you do have a prospect then whats the situation like? Give us details so we can make a better assesment on how you should approach the situation.

Given what I just asked, there are so many different ways to go about this but they are all situation-specific. How you met, what the girl is like, how you are around eachother, how open the two of you are as far as talking comfortably about "taboo" subjects etc.

Just too general of a question as it currently is, to really lay some solid advice out there.


If I were interested in something like that, I would find a girl that I hoped I could get into that type of situation, get drunk as hell with them and just see how she acted towards me... see if I felt that vibe. If I did, then I would pursue it that night and see how far it would go. If I didnt feel that connection, I would somehow try to work the subject of sex-life into the conversation. Then see what her response is and go from there. If she implys her's is currently shitty... well you pretty much have your shot right there if you play your cards right. If she says shes not hurtin for it or implys something like that, I'd just let it die and look for another "prospect", heh.

 

[EnderJE]

With me, it fucked me up and I lost a good friend. We said that we wouldn't take it father then a casual fuck, but then my feelings got involved and she wisely broke it off. Years later, she realized that she wanted me too; but by then it was too late and I moved on.

 

[jeepboi]

With me, it fucked me up and I lost a good friend. We said that we wouldn't take it father then a casual fuck, but then my feelings got involved and she wisely broke it off. Years later, she realized that she wanted me too; but by then it was too late and I moved on.

generally thats how it works, but as long as you keep feelings out of it your good. ( but that sound a whole lot easier than it is to do)

I chose not to do that with my very Hot friend and have been happy with the choice for over 10 years, because i know i would have eventually started having feelings for her or vice versa, a good friendship is really close to a relationship already.

So Good Luck!

 

[Freak Nasty]

Well it just so happens she is divorced. She needs help moving and I offered. Ive mentioned it to her before and she was not into it. She said that she was damaged (emotionally I guess) by her ex. I know I am not going to fall for her.

Long story short I am married and my is ok with me having a FWB. Yes I am sure of it. We are having fun in our relationship right now. The friend knows I'm married so its not like I am keeping it from her.

 

[PBR]

your married and in an "open relationship"....you will most likely have to seek out the "swingers" ....same mind-set and lifestyle. you might incounter a women somewhere who will play once or twice, but married people bring a host of potential problems for singles.

 

[Wulfgar]

ummm...use the internet..its a gold mine to find "freinds with Benefits"

 

[BigRupe]

Anyone ever have one? How does it start? Whats the secret to getting one?

Obvious I am looking for one, but am trying to decide on how to go about it. Do I find someone who is interested in being friends first then maybe after some time put us in a situation to go further.

Is it easier to go for the benefits part first. Maybe after that friendship is like a given.

Not trying to hit any swingers clubs or get 1 night stands. I want a steady thing. Theres more to the story thats not relevant at this point, but thats what I'm looking for, but like I said am confused on the best course of action.

Dude it NEVER works out in the end. Eventually they all fall in love or demand more.