Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below theres an intrinsic difference in the way men and women perceive talking about feeling. most guys look on a women expressing her feeling to them in a practical way as in at least i dont have to be a mind reader, at least if shes honest i wont have to waste any undue time with her.great at least that is cut and dryed etc.but for a women it goes much deeper and is really a way of confirming or deepening the connection she already feels and wishes to explore with out coming to any particular conclusions other than what she is feeling is right.
Do guys hate girls that are upfront about their feelings?
- Thread starter Waka
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Waka said:I've just having been weird thoughts about my close friend.... we had a past. That's over.
What I wanted to know is, do guys get really turned off if...say, the girl told him how she feels EXACTLY. I think if I were a guy, I would become completely repelled if a woman were to say "I miss ya!" or "I still feel something" but I say this because he's not that into relationships, and have no idea if he's interested. need perspective!
The only reason I've thought of this is because I have a guy friend who is open with his feelings, VERY open... (would send very long e-mails to me about it) and it really turned me away from his direction.
sharing some of your experiences would be cool too
Well it depends. A girl saying "I miss ya" shows she's interested and cares. So yeah that's nice to know obviously. I wouldn't wanna hear it at least before the first month but afterwards it's a good thing on occassion.
Now of course, I will never tell a girl that (I have in the past), b/c if I do that chase is over. Made that mistake too many times in the past.
araiber
New member
I've just having been weird thoughts about my close friend.... we had a past. That's over.
What I wanted to know is, do guys get really turned off if...say, the girl told him how she feels EXACTLY. I think if I were a guy, I would become completely repelled if a woman were to say "I miss ya!" or "I still feel something" but I say this because he's not that into relationships, and have no idea if he's interested. need perspective!
The only reason I've thought of this is because I have a guy friend who is open with his feelings, VERY open... (would send very long e-mails to me about it) and it really turned me away from his direction.
sharing some of your experiences would be cool too
I feel like i have to respond to put my philosophy on this board.
Guys are not something to be figured out - we are autonomous individuals, and believe it or not, we can sense things too.
My ex still tells me she wants to get back together - been 3 years. Sure, its strange (because I have no interest of even doing that!) but im able to approach the situation better and make my own decisions appropriately. It also helps because we can still talk about it openly, try to deal with it and not end up hurting each other's feelings unintentionally.
The stupidest situations come from lack of communication, or, the expectation of reading the minds of women.
Talk about things. If you feel a certain way, that will only open up to the quicker path towards whichever way you will go regardless. If you feel that you love a person, go ahead, say it. It does not have to be said back. If you require someone else to love you back for you to love them, then its not really genuine, is it?
If you are comfortable enough to open up with someone either you will learn quickly that he/she is not the right person for you, or, that you have made the right decision.
Its a catalyst, the reaction will happen eventually. Why wait it out?
Childish///AMG
New member
honesty is "Good" no time for games
Bikini Mod
New member
*sigh*
Old thread indeed. I have to sorta chuckle to m'self when I see who posted what....
Anyways...
My take?
Most MEN DONT want to know what their lady is feeling. Even if they have been married for some time. Men have a hard time dealing with feelings. Most were not raised with the *ability* or *permission* to feel. So depending on the age and circumstances I would have to say - to most women - NO - don't say shit to the dude. Let him open up first and even then, keep a lot of what is going on inside you TO YOURSELF because MOST MEN won't be able to deal.
I know ya'll are shocked to hear old and grey (yes, I have a ton of greys and wear them proudly) BIKINIMOM dispensing this type of advice to females but it is the gospel truth.
Most STRAIGHT MEN don't want to hear nor can they handle "the truth" about how a woman feels. They lack the ability. Perhaps younger men (born after 1970) were raised by more forward thinking mothers but generally men who were born before this time are TOTALLY INCAPABLE of handling exactly what a woman is feeling.
My advice?
If the guy is ticking you off - spell it out. Be succint.
If you love him or care for him - keep it to yourself. Let him come to you. Let your actions speak louder than your words. If he doesn't "get" how you feel. Dump his ass and move on to a man who is more in touch with who he is.
You will fare better. I promise you.
This does not mean play games. It just means that you shouldn't *scare* a man with too much information.
Old thread indeed. I have to sorta chuckle to m'self when I see who posted what....
Anyways...
My take?
Most MEN DONT want to know what their lady is feeling. Even if they have been married for some time. Men have a hard time dealing with feelings. Most were not raised with the *ability* or *permission* to feel. So depending on the age and circumstances I would have to say - to most women - NO - don't say shit to the dude. Let him open up first and even then, keep a lot of what is going on inside you TO YOURSELF because MOST MEN won't be able to deal.
I know ya'll are shocked to hear old and grey (yes, I have a ton of greys and wear them proudly) BIKINIMOM dispensing this type of advice to females but it is the gospel truth.
Most STRAIGHT MEN don't want to hear nor can they handle "the truth" about how a woman feels. They lack the ability. Perhaps younger men (born after 1970) were raised by more forward thinking mothers but generally men who were born before this time are TOTALLY INCAPABLE of handling exactly what a woman is feeling.
My advice?
If the guy is ticking you off - spell it out. Be succint.
If you love him or care for him - keep it to yourself. Let him come to you. Let your actions speak louder than your words. If he doesn't "get" how you feel. Dump his ass and move on to a man who is more in touch with who he is.
You will fare better. I promise you.
This does not mean play games. It just means that you shouldn't *scare* a man with too much information.
BeaR
New member
I always like to know how my girl is feeling all the time!I've just having been weird thoughts about my close friend.... we had a past. That's over.
What I wanted to know is, do guys get really turned off if...say, the girl told him how she feels EXACTLY. I think if I were a guy, I would become completely repelled if a woman were to say "I miss ya!" or "I still feel something" but I say this because he's not that into relationships, and have no idea if he's interested. need perspective!
The only reason I've thought of this is because I have a guy friend who is open with his feelings, VERY open... (would send very long e-mails to me about it) and it really turned me away from his direction.
sharing some of your experiences would be cool too
*ebony*
New member
i find it hard now to share my deepest feelings and thoughts with men, for the exact reason BikiniMom stated. You men claim you want to know what is going though our minds, yet your not interested in HEARING what i have to say much less LISTENING to what i'm telling you. Women aren't hard to read, there is nothing to be "decoded", if one would just open one's ears and listen. Men should try this concept out!
Hunh, did you say something?
