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Hi!
A few weeks ago i was introduced to a 29 year old woman by a friend of mine. We "had a lot in common", and she thought we might do well together. This is a friend I trust, and she was introducing me to a co-worker. She tells me this woman is divorced with no kids.
My friend told me this woman likes to go out, have fun, parties, goes to football games etc. Not exactly the mother of my kids, but could be fun / a friend / f-buddy whatever.
So I ask this woman out, and we agree to have dinner last Tuesday. We went out to dinner, which was about 2 and half hours, cost about $120, etc. She was a "7" on a 1 to 10 scale. I asked if she wanted to have a drink afterward, but she declined, citing work the next morning. I kissed her good night (no sparks) and dropped her off.
I knew the date had gone pretty poorly. I was sure she felt likewise. We talk the next day on IM, and she tells me she "didn't really have a good time" and "isn't sure if she's romantically attracted to me".
Fine cool whatever other stuff to do.
For the rest of the week, we chat maybe 10 mins a day on IM, but it's just casual chat. I went to NY over the weekend, and she called me in NY. We talked for about an hour, and I told her that "a mid week date is sometimes not the best way to meet someone - let's go out one more time, and if it sucks, we'll stop. If it's cool. we'll go from there". She told me about going out partying over the weekend, how drunk she was on Saturday, etc etc. (Great!!)
Anyway, she agreed to another date and suggested we go to an orlando magic game. Cool, easy, basketball, brainless etc. The game we were supposed to go to, was tonight.
Yesterday I was chatting with her on IM and it went about like this (forgive me, I lack Lestat's gift for cutting and pasting IMs.)
Matt: I don't think we should go out again
her: why? Why do you feel that way?
Matt: i feel like you're a 30 year old bar girl and I don't think that is what I am looking for. The way you act is incompatible with what I want.
her: How do I "act?"
Matt: Like a college girl. Like college was the last time you were happy and you want to stay there.
her: Whatever. I love my life.
Matt: Cool. That's great, i am happy for you. But I can't get along with that.
her: Single people go out. That's what they do. it's normal.
Matt: Living a meaningless life that impacts no one and nothing is normal too.
Her: Whatever.
Her: When I go out I see people 21-50.
Matt: yes. what you do is perfectly normal. And perfectly normal is not what I want out of life.
her: I already told you I wasn't that interested in you.
Matt: And now we know why. We see the world differently.
her: I am perfectly happy. I love my job, my roommates, my friends etc.
matt: Good. I am happy for you. I am not upset, and i don't want you to change.
That was about it. I didn't insult or anything. Later that day I apologized to her on email. I told her in the email i will not contact you again.
Today she emails me and says she wants to make "a fresh start", and that she was "not interested in me romantically right now", but she'd like to stay friends. Then later on, she IMs me. On IM, she tells me that "she was out until 4 last night at her friend's birthday party, and her roommate puked in her car...but she was afraid to tell me all of this because I would think she's stupid" (Like I care....people are so nuts)
I told her my I-Pod was fucking up my computer, and she said "They don't get along like we don't get along, I guess". WTF??
And she proceeds to chat for a while about how she wishes we were going to the game tonight, and how I need to send her pics from NY, how I should get her something when I go to St. Maarten, etc. she also asked if i would be in tallahassee this weekend for the FSU game.
What the fuck is wrong with her?
(1) desperate
(2) wants to date but doesn't know how to say it
(3) abused child
(4) stone cold clueless
(5) recognized there was some truth to what I was saying
(6) playing games with me
(7) other
You tell me. i have no idea.
A few weeks ago i was introduced to a 29 year old woman by a friend of mine. We "had a lot in common", and she thought we might do well together. This is a friend I trust, and she was introducing me to a co-worker. She tells me this woman is divorced with no kids.
My friend told me this woman likes to go out, have fun, parties, goes to football games etc. Not exactly the mother of my kids, but could be fun / a friend / f-buddy whatever.
So I ask this woman out, and we agree to have dinner last Tuesday. We went out to dinner, which was about 2 and half hours, cost about $120, etc. She was a "7" on a 1 to 10 scale. I asked if she wanted to have a drink afterward, but she declined, citing work the next morning. I kissed her good night (no sparks) and dropped her off.
I knew the date had gone pretty poorly. I was sure she felt likewise. We talk the next day on IM, and she tells me she "didn't really have a good time" and "isn't sure if she's romantically attracted to me".
Fine cool whatever other stuff to do.
For the rest of the week, we chat maybe 10 mins a day on IM, but it's just casual chat. I went to NY over the weekend, and she called me in NY. We talked for about an hour, and I told her that "a mid week date is sometimes not the best way to meet someone - let's go out one more time, and if it sucks, we'll stop. If it's cool. we'll go from there". She told me about going out partying over the weekend, how drunk she was on Saturday, etc etc. (Great!!)
Anyway, she agreed to another date and suggested we go to an orlando magic game. Cool, easy, basketball, brainless etc. The game we were supposed to go to, was tonight.
Yesterday I was chatting with her on IM and it went about like this (forgive me, I lack Lestat's gift for cutting and pasting IMs.)
Matt: I don't think we should go out again
her: why? Why do you feel that way?
Matt: i feel like you're a 30 year old bar girl and I don't think that is what I am looking for. The way you act is incompatible with what I want.
her: How do I "act?"
Matt: Like a college girl. Like college was the last time you were happy and you want to stay there.
her: Whatever. I love my life.
Matt: Cool. That's great, i am happy for you. But I can't get along with that.
her: Single people go out. That's what they do. it's normal.
Matt: Living a meaningless life that impacts no one and nothing is normal too.
Her: Whatever.
Her: When I go out I see people 21-50.
Matt: yes. what you do is perfectly normal. And perfectly normal is not what I want out of life.
her: I already told you I wasn't that interested in you.
Matt: And now we know why. We see the world differently.
her: I am perfectly happy. I love my job, my roommates, my friends etc.
matt: Good. I am happy for you. I am not upset, and i don't want you to change.
That was about it. I didn't insult or anything. Later that day I apologized to her on email. I told her in the email i will not contact you again.
Today she emails me and says she wants to make "a fresh start", and that she was "not interested in me romantically right now", but she'd like to stay friends. Then later on, she IMs me. On IM, she tells me that "she was out until 4 last night at her friend's birthday party, and her roommate puked in her car...but she was afraid to tell me all of this because I would think she's stupid" (Like I care....people are so nuts)
I told her my I-Pod was fucking up my computer, and she said "They don't get along like we don't get along, I guess". WTF??
And she proceeds to chat for a while about how she wishes we were going to the game tonight, and how I need to send her pics from NY, how I should get her something when I go to St. Maarten, etc. she also asked if i would be in tallahassee this weekend for the FSU game.
What the fuck is wrong with her?
(1) desperate
(2) wants to date but doesn't know how to say it
(3) abused child
(4) stone cold clueless
(5) recognized there was some truth to what I was saying
(6) playing games with me
(7) other
You tell me. i have no idea.
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