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caseygabriel
New member
(By Dennis Miller)
ONE - Foreplay is not a privilege; it is a birthright.
TWO - If you take her out to a fancy restaurant, don't try to subtly
steer her away from the lobster, Diamond Jim.
THREE - Quit blowing smoke up women's asses about the sanctity and power
they possess as lifegivers and come up with some decent, affordable
childcare. That way, maybe poor single mothers can go to work and get
off welfare and we won't have to listen to any more idiots in Congress
blathering about orphanages.
FOUR - Equal work for equal pay. Look around you at work, guys. Look
at...say Carl, the brain-dead jack-off in the cubicle next to you. You
could kill Carl, couldn't you, because he's a slacking, worthless, toady
idiot. Now, imagine making 30 percent less than Carl. Hellooo....
FIVE - This is very important: during lovemaking, don't ask, "Who's
your daddy?" Even as a joke. All right? It's not funny.
SIX - When her mouth moves, pay attention, words could be coming out.
Words are kind of important.
SEVEN - Pass a law that makes it compulsory for all over-the-hill rock
stars to have women their own age in their videos.
EIGHT - Don't ask her if she came. You're a big boy now, Clouseau, you
should know if she came.
NINE - Don't tell her how to merge and she won't tell you to ask for
directions.
TEN - When she catches you cheating on her and she cuts off your dick in
your sleep, take it like a man.
ONE - Foreplay is not a privilege; it is a birthright.
TWO - If you take her out to a fancy restaurant, don't try to subtly
steer her away from the lobster, Diamond Jim.
THREE - Quit blowing smoke up women's asses about the sanctity and power
they possess as lifegivers and come up with some decent, affordable
childcare. That way, maybe poor single mothers can go to work and get
off welfare and we won't have to listen to any more idiots in Congress
blathering about orphanages.
FOUR - Equal work for equal pay. Look around you at work, guys. Look
at...say Carl, the brain-dead jack-off in the cubicle next to you. You
could kill Carl, couldn't you, because he's a slacking, worthless, toady
idiot. Now, imagine making 30 percent less than Carl. Hellooo....
FIVE - This is very important: during lovemaking, don't ask, "Who's
your daddy?" Even as a joke. All right? It's not funny.
SIX - When her mouth moves, pay attention, words could be coming out.
Words are kind of important.
SEVEN - Pass a law that makes it compulsory for all over-the-hill rock
stars to have women their own age in their videos.
EIGHT - Don't ask her if she came. You're a big boy now, Clouseau, you
should know if she came.
NINE - Don't tell her how to merge and she won't tell you to ask for
directions.
TEN - When she catches you cheating on her and she cuts off your dick in
your sleep, take it like a man.
