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Selfish girlfriends?

blueta2 said:
On second thought about this topic, maybe you're not turning her on enough to want to give you a bj. A woman needs to feel sexy to do that.

Maybe there is something you can do different?

What? It's only fun when the bitch is gagging and tears are streaming down her face.

That's sexy to me though, it's just hard to convince the girl that the whole makeup streaming down the face and bile coming up look is good for her (me).
 
heatherrae said:
Ah, well some girls hate it; some girls love it; and some girls do it often just because they enjoy pleasing you. You have to just decide whether her dislike of it is a deal breaker for you or not. Would you really want to make her do it despite the fact that she doesn't like it? I never will let a guy do that to me unless I know that he is enjoying himself. Otherwise, I feel awkward, and there is no point.

Seriously. It's not worth it if it's not fun for the other person.

i LOVE to eat pussy. I am always like "what's for dessert" during dinner. Meanwhile I am staring at her crotch and licking my lips.

Damn, I feel like doing it right now.
 
cindylou said:
I would be bad at handing someone 10 grand.

thats just me.

lol :)

This is the part where we're supposed to be all "Naw, cindykins, you'd be GOOD at it! You're a good person. I like spending time with you. No, that dress doesn't make you look fat. Yes your breasts are perfect."
 
musclemom said:
Oak, the answer here is really simple, if you are really into this girl and expect to spend time with her, give up on blowjobs. If blowjobs are a high priority on your scale of sexual activities then find a new girlfriend who enjoys both giving and receiving oral. The women are out there, dear.

EDIT: The rest of this stuff is sort of stream of consciousness about dating behavior vis a vis neuroendocrinology and its impact on the brain in regards to both long and short term relationship behavior. Don't read it if my longwinded rambles bore you (you know who you are). You have been warned.


When we first fall into heavy infatuation (you know that feeling of walking on clouds all day, having no appetite, your heart leaping at just the sound of your beloved's name, you can't wait to see him/her again, you spend 10 minutes saying goodbye on the phone, etc., etc., etc.) both women and men will do more shit they don't necessarily love to amuse or please their new s/o. And NO, it's generally not an issue of deceit, it's more that whole first flush of infatuation creating high dopamine and norepinephrine levels and low serotonin levels, all of which in turn create a higher willingness to experiment. How many times have you heard about a chick saying to a guy "I've never done this before" or "I've never wanted to try this before." You cynics out there think they're lying and some of them are, but generally it's hormones! Very often that wonderfully new and in love endocrine system has more natural shit flowing through people's brains than your average attendee of a rave (science has proven this). This feeling eventually drops off and that's why there are people who serially fall in love. They are hooked on that first flush feeling of being infatuated and it can be intoxicating and addictive.

Over time, the more secure you become in the relationship the hormones change, you develop feelings less of romantic love and lust and more of attachment and comfort driven by oxytocin and vasopressin. Now your logical brain starts to engage a little more, and you start editing out the stuff you really struggle to do (holding in farts, brushing your teeth multiple times a day, wearing super sexy underwear all the time, taking a dump anywhere within proximity of your s/o).

There's actually a biological reason for all of this ... it has to do with perpetuation of the species. Theoretically, you've created a child by the time the first flush of romance wears off and now the focus of the relationship needs to become more about day to day survival and protection of the young and less about doing it like bunnies. If we stayed in a habitual state of dopamine driven ecstasy all we'd do is fuck and never plan for the future.

So when you're in a committed relationship you actually end up with a list of "I ain't fucking doing that shit no more." For men the list has a tendency to revolve around areas of personal hygiene and/or etiquette whereas for women the list is often heavily focused on sexual acts and general levels of tolerance for bullshit.

Why do you think marriage is hard? Sometimes you have to REALLY WORK to remind yourself that you really and truly DO love that miserable pain in the ass who is sitting across from you at the dinner table and by god you're going to keep this marriage together even if it means you're both hanging onto it like grim death.

The truth is one of the main reasons people manage to make a relationship last is less because of the things they have in common but more because they found the person whose annoying traits they find least offensive.

Awesome.
 
musclemom said:
"why did it start out so great and why did it go to shit?" .



Simple answer- Because "LIFE" got in the way.

But i always say if you prioritize your life, and few people do because of laziness, lack of drive, ignorance, acceptance... whatever, then you can keep it lively and "so great". YOU are in control of your life. It is just priorities.

I'm with digimon. I remember why I got married. I remember how great I felt whenever I saw my girlfriend/wife. I never want to let that go. We don't have enogh time? The dishes will get done tomorrow, but YOU will get done tonight baby.


and Done right.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
K to you sir! K TO YOU!!!

My husband and I have only been together for about 2 years and he romances me every chance he gets. I can't wait to get some of that there HRT so I will be able to keep up with his horny old ass. :qt:

Right, its not just about the bj. I want her to go out of her way to make me happy, just like i do for her. Im not talking about oral sex on my part, im talking everyday life. I love her, but sometimes she doesnt make the right choices.

All im saying i do everything or anything she needs and wants 90% of the time.. Just take a shot in the mouth, or at least TOUCH me in a sexual way instead of me doing everything!
 
TheOak84 said:
Right, its not just about the bj. I want her to go out of her way to make me happy, just like i do for her. Im not talking about oral sex on my part, im talking everyday life. I love her, but sometimes she doesnt make the right choices.

All im saying i do everything or anything she needs and wants 90% of the time.. Just take a shot in the mouth, or at least TOUCH me in a sexual way instead of me doing everything!


it's learned behavior on her part, either from her mother/sisters/girlfriends and or society.. more like a combination of all of it..

Find out her mothers opinions on sex and marriage.. if she says "sex is all men want from a woman" ...

you need to run as fast as you can.. personal experience speaking here..

Daddy issues, low self esteem.. when was the last time you told her her vagina was beautiful?? or that she was pretty?? I tell mine every day, and she does me as well..

as for sex.. to a man, it's more about being accepted and loved, it's that simple.
 
digimon7068 said:
meh. . .my wife and i still spend significant amounts of time with our mouths on each other's hey-nonny-nonnies. . .and i'm pretty sure we both still enjoy it. . .quite a bit. . .19 years this october. . .it doesn't have to get old or lose its appeal. :)

How many kids so far?
 
TheOak84 said:
My gf never gives me head... EVER... She used to when we dated before, but anyway. I always go down on her, to make sure she gets hers, but she never compensates me for no reason. She should feel lucky that i give her an O'er. i feel like im getting ripped off :(

Ive brought it up many times, but theres always an excuse with her.

Is she a selfish bitch?


You are and she is
 
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