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Serious question for serious times

Lestat

Lestat

MVP
EF VIP
Its been a heavy couple of days so far, most if you know the reason why. I mean heavy on EF.

It also highlighted something that I noticed now more than ever, and to be honest I wouldn't have ever noticed this 10 years ago and I certainly would have been part of it.

The problem I mention is the rampant use of homophobic and anti homosexual references. It seems like every post is calling someone a 'fgt' maybe I am getting old, but it isn't funny anymore, its the opposite, it isn't right. To me its the same as calling people a 'Ngr' because you think its fun and its something we can use to deride people.

I know why we do it, because I used to do it. In my teens when I wanted to say something was stupid, I said "that is gay" or "you are so gay" When someone said their favorite color was pink, I'd say "what a fag!" it was very common. I didn't know any better.

Now I do, and I'd like to say that we can do better at EF. I am a little surprised that sort of divisive language is still tolerated on EF or hasn't been regulated to a separate forum. We moved out all the sex talk to between the sheets, we moved out the religious and political talk, why not move out all the homophobic talk as well? Better yet, why not get rid of it altogether. It really isn't that funny, and even if it was, can't we find a more creative, or smarter way to get the same laughs? If not, you need to try harder.
 
Lestat said:
Its been a heavy couple of days so far, most if you know the reason why. I mean heavy on EF.

It also highlighted something that I noticed now more than ever, and to be honest I wouldn't have ever noticed this 10 years ago and I certainly would have been part of it.

The problem I mention is the rampant use of homophobic and anti homosexual references. It seems like every post is calling someone a 'fgt' maybe I am getting old, but it isn't funny anymore, its the opposite, it isn't right. To me its the same as calling people a 'Ngr' because you think its fun and its something we can use to deride people.

I know why we do it, because I used to do it. In my teens when I wanted to say something was stupid, I said "that is gay" or "you are so gay" When someone said their favorite color was pink, I'd say "what a fag!" it was very common. I didn't know any better.

Now I do, and I'd like to say that we can do better at EF. I am a little surprised that sort of divisive language is still tolerated on EF or hasn't been regulated to a separate forum. We moved out all the sex talk to between the sheets, we moved out the religious and political talk, why not move out all the homophobic talk as well? Better yet, why not get rid of it altogether. It really isn't that funny, and even if it was, can't we find a more creative, or smarter way to get the same laughs? If not, you need to try harder.
Click to expand...

valid point bro


guess you'll be changing your pork swords location now
 
PICK3 said:
I also find your cross sig comment highly offensive
Click to expand...

I could defend that one all day, because mainly, its not about anyone or anything specific, its a quote from a song lyric. Having said that, I changed it. For one, I hadn't looked at my signature for years and it is a little long as it is. And second, assuming it really was offensive to you, why not change it? My intent was not to offend you or anyone else with it, it was more to incorporate lyrics from my favorite band into my posts.

My location is not meant to be offensive or make fun of homosexuals. If it is wrong, I had no problem changing it. The idea behind that is that Wootoom and I are so close, such good friends, that it wouldn't be out of the question to touch peens. Of course even though we are friends, we'd still never do that, because hey, that's gay, and we're not gay, but that was the point behind it.

Wootoom is a great person and I simply wanted to find a fun way to incorporate him into my posts. You have a point though, that I could, and should be more creative with it. I am thinking about what to change it to now.
 
Lestat said:
I could defend that one all day, because mainly, its not about anyone or anything specific, its a quote from a song lyric. Having said that, I changed it. For one, I hadn't looked at my signature for years and it is a little long as it is. And second, assuming it really was offensive to you, why not change it? My intent was not to offend you or anyone else with it, it was more to incorporate lyrics from my favorite band into my posts.

My location is not meant to be offensive or make fun of homosexuals. If it is wrong, I had no problem changing it. The idea behind that is that Wootoom and I are so close, such good friends, that it wouldn't be out of the question to touch peens. Of course even though we are friends, we'd still never do that, because hey, that's gay, and we're not gay, but that was the point behind it.

Wootoom is a great person and I simply wanted to find a fun way to incorporate him into my posts. You have a point though, that I could, and should be more creative with it. I am thinking about what to change it to now.
Click to expand...

I really wasn't offended.

I don't think anything on a chat forum could offend me personally.

but I see the point of your original poast and will try to tone it down accordingly


Newbies and/or spammers are still fair game though :chainsaw::strider36:strider36:strider36:destroy:
 
Lestat said:
Now I do, and I'd like to say that we can do better at EF. I am a little surprised that sort of divisive language is still tolerated on EF or hasn't been regulated to a separate forum. We moved out all the sex talk to between the sheets, we moved out the religious and political talk, why not move out all the homophobic talk as well? Better yet, why not get rid of it altogether. It really isn't that funny, and even if it was, can't we find a more creative, or smarter way to get the same laughs? If not, you need to try harder.
Click to expand...

I'm not surprised lol this forum is unmoderated besides woot. We moderate ourselves.

It used to make me a little uncomfortable but now since the rest of the world is so PC (and there aren't many people here to actually be offended) and since I know most no one here means to actually offend anyone I just e-roll my eyes.
 
this is the island of misfit toys...sensitivity isn't a real hot commodity around here.

additionally, this place is truly all-but-dead, due in large part to management's attempts to make a roid website "legitimate".
 
There is still a community here, and if you look at the posts you see a lot of things that would likely turn others away. I am all for newbie hazing, and I got no qualms with being nasty to spammers, but why use homophobic slurs to do it? Plenty of other creative ways to get your points across.

But like I said, I've been one of the worst offenders of this throughout my life, so I completely understand where it comes from. When I was calling my friend a "fag" I didn't mean anything negative to gays, it just so happened that because of the culture at the time, that was one of the worst things you could say to someone. That is what needs to change, I'm embarrassed for myself. Better late than never though, we're always growing and (hopefully) improving.
 
Lestat said:
There is still a community here, and if you look at the posts you see a lot of things that would likely turn others away. I am all for newbie hazing, and I got no qualms with being nasty to spammers, but why use homophobic slurs to do it? Plenty of other creative ways to get your points across.

But like I said, I've been one of the worst offenders of this throughout my life, so I completely understand where it comes from. When I was calling my friend a "fag" I didn't mean anything negative to gays, it just so happened that because of the culture at the time, that was one of the worst things you could say to someone. That is what needs to change, I'm embarrassed for myself. Better late than never though, we're always growing and (hopefully) improving.
Click to expand...

i guess all i'm thinking is that it's a friggin' steroid board...and if you come to a website that on it's very surface promotes illegal activities and you expect to find a warm-soft-thoughtful environment? then you probably believe in unicorns too.

part of the appeal of this place and others like it is that you can act a fool without any real fear of retribution...and for the most part, it's just shits-n-giggles.

besides, this friggin' place is death-rattling at this point anyway...
 
Oh fuck off. Seriously.



Can't say fag now? God forbid anyone ever get offended. That's what is wrong w/this country. America used to be a super power. Took zero shit. We're a bunch of politically correct pussies.



Fuck everyone.
 
miplank said:
Oh fuck off. Seriously.



Can't say fag now? God forbid anyone ever get offended. That's what is wrong w/this country. America used to be a super power. Took zero shit. We're a bunch of politically correct pussies.



Fuck everyone.
Click to expand...

while we're on that subject, i do feel an increasing amount of pressure to feel shame for being...

white,
male,
catholic,
heterosexual and
middle class

...like i've done something wrong. well, i'm not drinking the kool-aid.
 
digimon7068 said:
i guess all i'm thinking is that it's a friggin' steroid board...and if you come to a website that on it's very surface promotes illegal activities and you expect to find a warm-soft-thoughtful environment? then you probably believe in unicorns too.

part of the appeal of this place and others like it is that you can act a fool without any real fear of retribution...and for the most part, it's just shits-n-giggles.

besides, this friggin' place is death-rattling at this point anyway...
Click to expand...

I get your points, and I'm not saying you can't say anything offensive, if this was a rule the last of the regular posters would likely be gone, but what I'm say is we can be rude and offensive to each other without deriding homosexuals in the process. Not expecting warm and soft, and not expecting it to go away completely, but its pretty much front and center for this particular forum all the time.
 
digimon7068 said:
while we're on that subject, i do feel an increasing amount of pressure to feel shame for being...

white,
male,
catholic,
heterosexual and
middle class

...like i've done something wrong. well, i'm not drinking the kool-aid.
Click to expand...


I am most of those as well but feel no guilt man.. this isn't about being super PC, this is about basic and fundamental respect for a large class of people.
 
digimon7068 said:
i guess all i'm thinking is that it's a friggin' steroid board...and if you come to a website that on it's very surface promotes illegal activities and you expect to find a warm-soft-thoughtful environment? then you probably believe in unicorns too.

part of the appeal of this place and others like it is that you can act a fool without any real fear of retribution...and for the most part, it's just shits-n-giggles.

besides, this friggin' place is death-rattling at this point anyway...
Click to expand...
:wavey:
 
miplank said:
Oh fuck off. Seriously.



Can't say fag now? God forbid anyone ever get offended. That's what is wrong w/this country. America used to be a super power. Took zero shit. We're a bunch of politically correct pussies.



Fuck everyone.
Click to expand...
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CJZSNfJUAAQZUvR.jpg
CJZSNfJUAAQZUvR.jpg
 
Lestat said:
I am most of those as well but feel no guilt man.. this isn't about being super PC, this is about basic and fundamental respect for a large class of people.
Click to expand...

oh, i refuse to feel guilty...but the world is asking me too...and then looking down on me when i don't.

you know something else? you live in california...legal weed, safety zones for illegals, use your welfare card at the drive-through at the liquor store, etc. you guys go out of your way to make sure everyone feels comfortable. shit!! you probably actually DO have unicorns!

come to the heartland for a while sometime and then talk to me. it's a different world out here, brocephus.
 
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and...some of that rhetoric is a backlash for having all this shit jammed down our throats and clogging up our legal systems when, the reality is that, most people are just like me...and we don't give a shit how you live your life. are you breaking any laws? no?? have at it! and leave me out of it...i got work to do.
 
digimon7068 said:
oh, i refuse to feel guilty...but the world is asking me too...and then looking down on me when i don't.

you know something else? you live in california...legal weed, safety zones for illegals, use your welfare card at the drive-through at the liquor store, etc. you guys go out of your way to make sure everyone feels comfortable. shit!! you probably actually DO have unicorns!

come to the heartland for a while sometime and then talk to me. it's a different world out here, brocephus.
Click to expand...

I will say, legal weed does make life easier. No reason why every state shouldn't enjoy the same freedoms there.

I have no doubt that there are vast differences between where I live and where you do, but my point is lets not disparage homosexuals at every turn, its not necessary and its not right.
 
wheres the outrage and shaming for men using the word bitch or pussy or anything feminine used derogatory towards each other? There's more women than homosexuals and it's still okay to call someone a pussy or tell a boy he throws like a girl.
 
cindylou said:
wheres the outrage and shaming for men using the word bitch or pussy or anything feminine used derogatory towards each other? There's more women than homosexuals and it's still okay to call someone a pussy or tell a boy he throws like a girl.
Click to expand...

throw like a girl is plain stupid.

calling someone a pussy isn't ok either.
 
I'm going to use only dictionary words from now on. No urban dictionary slang. Except blue waffles, that one stays. ;)
 
miplank said:
^LOL, no shit!


Can't say fag
Can't have a confederate flag
Can't shoot a lion
Can't be white and do anything to anyone else
and so on...
Click to expand...


I laffed!

But now I have to cancel my damn safari/hunting expedition!
 
digimon7068 said:
oh, i refuse to feel guilty...but the world is asking me too...and then looking down on me when i don't.

you know something else? you live in california...legal weed, safety zones for illegals, use your welfare card at the drive-through at the liquor store, etc. you guys go out of your way to make sure everyone feels comfortable. shit!! you probably actually DO have unicorns!

come to the heartland for a while sometime and then talk to me. it's a different world out here, brocephus.
Click to expand...


Just look down at your abs and tell the rest of them to stfu! [emoji12]
 
Lestat said:
I trust you will always be slightly wiser and considerate of others from this moment on.
Click to expand...

I'm afraid I'm going let you down, buddy

I feel a strong urge to make disparaging remarks about someone's sechual orientation real soon
 
PICK3 said:
I'm afraid I'm going let you down, buddy

I feel a strong urge to make disparaging remarks about someone's sechual orientation real soon
Click to expand...

bad bro material. don't be a mitch.
 
Im all for not offending people but I don't agree with comparing fgt to the N word. That is not accurate imo and trivializes the N word. I don't like misogynist slurs like cunt or bitch but I wouldn't compare them to the N word at all and in my opinion I don't think it's appropriate to do it with the f word either. The N word is vile and its repulsive and shouldn't be uttered by anyone that has any shred of decency or class in their language. Yuck.
 
cindylou said:
Im all for not offending people but I don't agree with comparing fgt to the N word. That is not accurate imo and trivializes the N word. I don't like misogynist slurs like cunt or bitch but I wouldn't compare them to the N word at all and in my opinion I don't think it's appropriate to do it with the f word either. The N word is vile and its repulsive and shouldn't be uttered by anyone that has any shred of decency or class in their language. Yuck.
Click to expand...

I disagree.
 
cindylou said:
I think most people do

I mean how dare you
Click to expand...

Swear words are the spice of the English language. I swear a lot and often. And enjoy the varying degrees of severity which certain words contain. I don't particularly adhere to the root of the word. I mean, out of a fit of rage said "ngr cnt fck!" even though there wasn't one around. My go to word is mthrfckrcksckrsonofafcknbtch.
 
H_T_ said:
Swear words are the spice of the English language. I swear a lot and often. And enjoy the varying degrees of severity which certain words contain. I don't particularly adhere to the root of the word. I mean, out of a fit of rage said "ngr cnt fck!" even though there wasn't one around. My go to word is mthrfckrcksckrsonofafcknbtch.
Click to expand...

Oh, no I have no problem with swear words. I've said and say them all, except I've never said the N word. Ever. It's a disgusting word. Maybe it's because I'm a lady, but I can't say that word. I wasn't raised at all to curse anyway, I would get in huge trouble if I used an unlady like word like barf so I don't know how I got the mouth that I have lol but I cannot bring myself to say the N word it's so gross to say. My reaction to people using the word, what the word means vs my reaction to faggot and what that word means, I don't think they can and should be compared. The N word has meaning and weight to it. Faggot used as an insult holds the same weight as bitch, someone can choose to be offended by it or not. I'm not offended when a man uses feminine words as derogatory insults unless he's my man. The N word is offensive period, imo. Of course, I can't tell someone what they can and can't be offended by, that's not what I mean to do either. Fuck it, never mind.

I've said faggot (not hatefully but to be funny) and I think the word can be funny, around certain people and in the right circumstances. The outrage over the use of the use of the word is annoying. I don't know why that annoys me. No, it's not socially acceptable to say the word fgt if you're a celebrity or have a huge following online but every day people can't even be assholes on reddit anymore. The whole internet needs to chill out imo. I'm the most PC person I know, and I think the net is becoming too PC now.
 
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I think most of the time you guys said "that's so gay" or "you're a faggot" is not to disparage actually being a homosexual but to disparage something being feminine, or unmanly anyway. Sometimes it was used to mean something was lame. Not that being gay is lame, but being womanly or unmanly is lame. That's why you're all like, oh well I never meant to be offensive towards homosexuals I just meant to make fun of this dude because he was doing something girly. Am I wrong?
 
cindylou said:
I think most of the time you guys said "that's so gay" or "you're a faggot" is not to disparage actually being a homosexual but to disparage something being feminine, or unmanly anyway. Sometimes it was used to mean something was lame. Not that being gay is lame, but being womanly or unmanly is lame. That's why you're all like, oh well I never meant to be offensive towards homosexuals I just meant to make fun of this dude because he was doing something girly. Am I wrong?
Click to expand...

over-analyzing things is fucking gay....










































:goof:
 
cindylou said:
I think most of the time you guys said "that's so gay" or "you're a faggot" is not to disparage actually being a homosexual but to disparage something being feminine, or unmanly anyway. Sometimes it was used to mean something was lame. Not that being gay is lame, but being womanly or unmanly is lame. That's why you're all like, oh well I never meant to be offensive towards homosexuals I just meant to make fun of this dude because he was doing something girly. Am I wrong?
Click to expand...

Exactly, but using "gay" to mean something is unmanly, girly, feminine, lame is disparaging to homosexuals.
 
sexyMFer said:
Human nature is never going to allow this fantasy world where no one is offended to happen.
Click to expand...

Of course not, all I am bringing up here is lets not call someone a fag, faggot, fgt, or gay when we really mean to call them lame, stupid, feminine, girly, stupid, or any other insult.

There are plenty of ways to insult someone, and when you insult someone the intent is to offend right? I'm not saying don't offend people, I'm saying don't offend homosexuals while you are intending to offend/insult someone else.
 
cindylou said:
wait, girly and feminine is an insult right in line with lame and stupid? I'm offended! ;)
Click to expand...

Great point! No, I don't think its particularly good to call someone girly and feminine as an insult, but girly and feminine don't represent a specific class of people so its a little lower down on the priority list. There are times where its good to be girly and feminine and times where I suppose it could be bad.
 
cindylou said:
I'm pretty sure you just said women aren't people :p Im offended again, Lestat ;)
Click to expand...


no, being "girly" or "feminine" isn't a class of people, dudes can be girly of feminine.. and it isn't a bad thing.
 
cindylou said:
I know what you meant, I was just twisting your words to be an ass, sorry lol
Click to expand...

You weren't really slightly offended and were pointing out how easy it is to take offense to everything little thing? But you don't really care to make a huge deal out of it?

You must not be a democrat
 
And the parents get to stay here to raise the kid, right. So it's offensive because people don't like to hear the truth?
 
What is an anchor baby?
Never heard that one
 
the phrase is completely neutral and shorter than Children born to undocumented immigrants in the United States. In 2011 it was considered disparaging and it was deemed offensive so now no one can say it. This isn't the only thing that we can't say anymore. Fuck them and their doublespeak.
 
Ahhhh thanks! You're better than google [emoji12]
 
I love how that dude said "look it up in the dictionary" like it's always been offensive and it's common knowledge that's it's offensive and anyone who uses it is an asshole. That's manipulative. No, it's just recently been deemed offensive... a couple of years ago offensive was added to that definition in the dictionary after someone wrote an article about how "offensive" it was when before it was considered neutral. Doublespeak.
 
cindylou said:
Oh, no I have no problem with swear words. I've said and say them all, except I've never said the N word. Ever. It's a disgusting word. Maybe it's because I'm a lady, but I can't say that word. I wasn't raised at all to curse anyway, I would get in huge trouble if I used an unlady like word like barf so I don't know how I got the mouth that I have lol but I cannot bring myself to say the N word it's so gross to say. My reaction to people using the word, what the word means vs my reaction to faggot and what that word means, I don't think they can and should be compared. The N word has meaning and weight to it. Faggot used as an insult holds the same weight as bitch, someone can choose to be offended by it or not. I'm not offended when a man uses feminine words as derogatory insults unless he's my man. The N word is offensive period, imo. Of course, I can't tell someone what they can and can't be offended by, that's not what I mean to do either. Fuck it, never mind.


I've said faggot (not hatefully but to be funny) and I think the word can be funny, around certain people and in the right circumstances. The outrage over the use of the use of the word is annoying. I don't know why that annoys me. No, it's not socially acceptable to say the word fgt if you're a celebrity or have a huge following online but every day people can't even be assholes on reddit anymore. The whole internet needs to chill out imo. I'm the most PC person I know, and I think the net is becoming too PC now.
Click to expand...
They don't have ngrs where you live?
 
I'm Hispanic and I'm not offended by anchor baby. Parents of US born children don't get to stay in the country anymore. Immigrants still try to birth here anyway because at least the child obtains citizenship. That's what Trump is trying to change.
 
The messicans I know seem genuinely happy to be here, unlike the dirty muslimish shop owners who dislike the people who frequent their businesses. Arabs are the new ngr. I apologize to all of the ethics I hopefully offended, fyi, I'm Western slavic, my peoples were slaves befo' yo people was.....
 
nangiggles said:
I'm Hispanic and I'm not offended by anchor baby. Parents of US born children don't get to stay in the country anymore. Immigrants still try to birth here anyway because at least the child obtains citizenship. That's what Trump is trying to change.
Click to expand...

They don't get to stay here anymore but they still are. The kids are in school, are they leaving their kids behind? I assume that they don't leave their kids behind, surely they don't, right? I don't understand the phrase because I didn't think the parents were allowed to stay just because they had a child here. I don't get it. Lol. But I know they are, they just stay undocumented, right?

When I enrolled Abby in public school I had to fill out a bunch of forms explaining what language was spoken primarily by myself and her in the home. I have a friend whose job is to teach these kids English as a second language, they go into kindergarten not knowing any English. Some 30% of the kids starting school in that district don't know any English at all.
 
nangiggles said:
I'm Hispanic and I'm not offended by anchor baby. Parents of US born children don't get to stay in the country anymore. Immigrants still try to birth here anyway because at least the child obtains citizenship. That's what Trump is trying to change.
Click to expand...

i'm a garden-variety white guy and i'm offended by ice-ice-baby...

 
nangiggles said:
I'm Hispanic and I'm not offended by anchor baby. Parents of US born children don't get to stay in the country anymore. Immigrants still try to birth here anyway because at least the child obtains citizenship. That's what Trump is trying to change.
Click to expand...

No, the kids don't get to stay either. That's the entire point of the term "anchor baby"


The US born children of illegals are in his and a lot of other peoples eyes still illegal. They're interpreting the 14th amendment differently which does not include coming here illegally for the sole purpose of US birth right.

They would have to apply and do it legally like everyone else.
 
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