WTF is with this chuck norris shit

[Maverick]

a couple of my friends are all on this chuck norris kick like everyone else on the internet is........ fuck it is annoying.

How did this start ? was it because of Conan ?

I hate it when something gets trendy and everyone jumps on the bandwagon...... so played and they think they are so cool too.

Die

 

[cyrex]

Chuck norris started it. He got tired of looking at people and turning them to stone so he had people spread the word to cut down on the number of stoners in the world

 

[cyrex]

- Chuck Norris only masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
- The Great Wall of China was originally made to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed horribly.
- when chuck norris jumps into water, chuch norris doesn't get wet, water gets Chuck norris
- If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you could be seconds away from death.
- Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
- Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father did.
- Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
- Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK’s head exploded out of sheer amazement.
- The bomb dropped on hiroshima was just a metal case containing one of chuck norris' farts
- Chuck Norris has never appeared in a video game because there would be no challenge
- Chuck Norris beat Tetris with his left hand at the same time he beat packman with his right

 

[cyrex]

that old dead baby joke:
"What's worse than a pile of dead babies?

A pile of dead babies with one live baby in the middle eating it's way out"

Chuck was the live baby and he also made the pile

 

[Y_lifter]

Everyone hates jealous Chuck haters..

 

[cyrex]

hehe the dead baby one I made up

 

[genetic freak]

Chuck Norris does not sleep...... He waits.

 

[jenscats5]

They're all silly.....but damned funny....

 

[hotzie]

whats up barry

 

[slat1]

I didn't laugh the first time. Thats just me though. If it amuses some people let them enjoy themselves!

 

[justinjones1963]

When you pray to god, Chuck Norris listens, Then round house kicks you to the head for believeing in god and not Chuck Norris.

 

[GoldenDelicious]

hehe the dead baby one I made up

i could tell

...it sucked







(lol jk)





(not really)

 

[Maverick]

but who started it ?

 

[wootoom]

whats up barry

LOL@barry brabooski. post a pic Hotzie

 

[BrothaBill]

a couple of my friends are all on this chuck norris kick like everyone else on the internet is........ fuck it is annoying.

How did this start ? was it because of Conan ?

I hate it when something gets trendy and everyone jumps on the bandwagon...... so played and they think they are so cool too.

Die

You know, you kinda look like him

 

[eat big]

If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.

Chuck Norris touched MC Hammer.

 

[cyrex]

Chuck noris beat Ali with a flyswatter

 

[cyrex]

yeah yeah yeah I made that one up too

"Fly like a butterfly sting like a bee..."

 

[digger]

Chuck Norris' C programs can dereference null pointers AND divide by zero.

 

[spongebob]

chuck norris practices 100 high kicks a day.

 

[eat big]

Chuck noris beat Ali with a flyswatter

If Chuck Norris ever even dreams of beating Ali, he better wake up and apologize.

 

[jackangel]

lol at digger getting into it

 

[needtogetaas]

Chuck Norris' C programs can dereference null pointers AND divide by zero.

lol.i got this one.

 

[spongebob]

when chuck norris goes to the store, he has people bag his groceries.

 

[genetic freak]

God wanted 10 days to create the world. Chuck Norris gave him 6.

 

[spongebob]

when chuck norris takes a shower, the water beads off of him.

 

[genetic freak]

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

Chuck Norris powers the earth's rotation, making it turn an extra quarter day per year. Few people know this, but Chuck Norris created the Leap Year, and to honor himself, every four years on February 29th he goes to the center of the earth to sleep.........for one day.

 

[H_T_]

didn't he open a restaurant or something? specializing in: Fear?

 

[Alyosha K.]

Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of Beard. Jesus wore it proudly up to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus's obvious favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck Norris omitted from the Bible.

Shortly after, all three Wisemen died of "roundhouse kick"-related deaths.

 

[cyrex]

Chuck Norris' C programs can dereference null pointers AND divide by zero.

HAHA

 

[Dial_tone]

I predict the end result of all this will be a new Chuck Norris tv movie. Some tv producer's son will be read about chuck on the net and convince Pop that Chuck is the new *IN* thing.

 

[Maverick]

Digger getting into this made me even more angry.......... anyway, all jokes aside, how did this really start ? can someone answer this seriously ? I know there will be alot more chuck sayings but can one person answer this !!!

 

[Spartacus]

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

 

[H_T_]

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

lmao. i knew you'd eventually show up.

 

[gjohnson5]

I may have to try that excersize machine that he had thre infomercials about

 

[cyrex]

Digger getting into this made me even more angry.......... anyway, all jokes aside, how did this really start ? can someone answer this seriously ? I know there will be alot more chuck sayings but can one person answer this !!!

I think they've been around for quite a while (i've seen some websites that have them that haven't been updated for years)

But I am guessing that someone like Conan or something started saying them in front of a large public audience and they caught on.

 

[spongebob]

when chuck norris takes a shit, he doesnt even have to flush the toilet.

 

[powerslave]

Digger getting into this made me even more angry.......... anyway, all jokes aside, how did this really start ? can someone answer this seriously ? I know there will be alot more chuck sayings but can one person answer this !!!

It was started by some college student. There was an article in the Dayton Daily News about this Thursday or Friday.

 

[spongebob]

chuck norris can throw stones in a glass house.

 

[DieselGunz]

Wtf?