Whats the most desperate thing any of you guys have done to get some ass?

[gstacker]

 

[slimjim1985]

This calls for a joke:

The CIA was looking for a professional assassin. They needed a cold-blooded killer. It came down to three guys and they had to make the final decision.

So they gave them all the same test. They went to the first guy and said: "Your girlfriend is in the next room. Here is a loaded pistol. Go in there and kill her." The guy said: "No way. I quit" and walked away.

So they went to the second guy and said: "Your fiance is in the other room. Here is a loaded pistol. Go in there and kill her." The second guy walks into the room and comes out about three minutes later and says: "I can't do it. I quit".

So they go to the third guy and say: "Your wife is in the other room. Here is a loaded pistol. Go in there and kill her." The third guy goes into the room and they heard six shots fired. Then they heard a huge commotion and about five minutes later the third guy comes out covered in blood. They ask him what happened and he said: "Well the gun was full of blanks so I had to beat her to death with it."

Classic!

I used a fake a business conference in shit hole salt lake city as an excuse to drive up there and meet this cute lil llady. 12 hour drive i may add. Stayed with this girls sister for the first night, next night got a hotel, met this lil lady, got drunk and started getting sloppy. Next thing I know, she gets off and i violently get pushed off because apparently she had a boyfriend although felt it wasn't a problem till after she gets laid and there I' am left hangin'. Needless to say I was not to happy so I left that minute to drive back to cali. I was also stuck with the 200 dollar hotel bill. A charade that will go down in history as my greatest strikeout.

 

[captainahole]

Married her or sorry thought you said the stupidist thing you did.