I don't know anymore. I have had to totally step back and reevaluate what I want to do with myself. I thought I wanted to do a competition, but I am seriously doubting that now. I am at a point in my life where there are so many other things I want to concentrate on, and fitness is not ranking high on that list. I have spent so many years not feeling good about myself, always thinking I am sub-par, and berating myself for not being "dedicated enough" or "serious enough" to do a competition. Finally I am starting to see the idiotcy in that. The fitness life is very hard on the self-esteem. I am not sure what I want anymore.
I put on several pounds of muscle this winter, balanced out my upper/lower body pretty nicely. But I also added some fat.
Short Term.....through the summer.....get rid of this fat, about 5lbs of it, so maybe 2-3%BF.
Long Term....still figuring that out. I want to be healthy, both physically, mentally and emotionally. I am trying to figure out HOW.