uh oh.

[stilleto]

i was serious about thinking that maybe I should look for a job.
ideally, i want to work part time and not very hard. I want some power, to make a decent amount of money (none of this $10 an hour shit), and work close to home. I want to be able to come and go as i please, and surf the net while at the office.

so i wrote up a resume.

surprisingly, there wasn't that many places for me to send it to, other than a really big company that's right near my house. i sent it there, as well as another place that's not far. neither said they had an actual job opening for what i want to do (nothing), but... the other place just wrote me and wants me to come in for an interview on thursday. to be a technical writer. they make some shit i never heard of, but apparently every nobel physics winner has.

I hope they don't want me to learn their product line. i might have to hire samoth and sassy to teach me.

or, you know, do my job for me.

 

[the-short-one]

i was serious about thinking that maybe I should look for a job.
ideally, i want to work part time and not very hard. I want some power, to make a decent amount of money (none of this $10 an hour shit), and work close to home. I want to be able to come and go as i please, and surf the net while at the office.

so i wrote up a resume.

surprisingly, there wasn't that many places for me to send it to, other than a really big company that's right near my house. i sent it there, as well as another place that's not far. neither said they had an actual job opening for what i want to do (nothing), but... the other place just wrote me and wants me to come in for an interview on thursday. to be a technical writer. they make some shit i never heard of, but apparently every nobel physics winner has.

I hope they don't want me to learn their product line. i might have to hire samoth and sassy to teach me.

or, you know, do my job for me.

technical writer = writing technical manuals?

that sounds like a lot of fun, stilleto. lolol

 

[jenscats5]

Kiss a lot of butt & no one will care if you can do your job or not......

 

[ortiz34]

No work for you, need to stay focused on your EF job.

 

[stilleto]

technical writer = writing technical manuals?

that sounds like a lot of fun, stilleto. lolol

i guess so. or sales material and stuff i think. i hope i don't have to work late. or travel. or learn anything.
and i need a very big office.

 

[chilidog0425]

in the interview, tell them you need a company cell phone, company car, and 8 weeks of paid vacation a year. and you'll settle for nothing less than management.

also, you better learn how to do those TPS reports right.

 

[stilleto]

No work for you, need to stay focused on your EF job.

maybe you're right.
i might be a little TOO creative to write something seriously technical.

 

[stilleto]

in the interview, tell them you need a company cell phone, company car, and 8 weeks of paid vacation a year. and you'll settle for nothing less than management.

also, you better learn how to do those TPS reports right.

what the hell is a tps report?
i'm nervous about the interview- but mostly because what if the job is really good? i'll have to take it and... you know... work.

 

[ortiz34]

what the hell is a tps report?
i'm nervous about the interview- but mostly because what if the job is really good? i'll have to take it and... you know... work.

Ever seen the movie office space? That is where the "tps reports" came from.
Ummmm....K? yeeaaahh.....

 

[UA_Iron]

what the hell is a tps report?
i'm nervous about the interview- but mostly because what if the job is really good? i'll have to take it and... you know... work.

did you get the memo?

I'm a better technical writer than Sassy or Samoth btw.

 

[anthrax]

Why don't you run a whorehouse?

You don't work much
You're the boss
you make a lot of money
You have flexible hours
You don't have to learn any technical skills
You meet a lot of people

 

[stilleto]

Why don't you run a whorehouse?

You don't work much
You're the boss
you make a lot of money
You have flexible hours
You don't have to learn any technical skills
You meet a lot of people

hey.
maybe i can be a pimp/madam.

not a bad idea. i just need a ho.

habitual health??????????????

 

[stilleto]

did you get the memo?

I'm a better technical writer than Sassy or Samoth btw.

wanna do the job? i'll pay you exactly half of what they're gonna pay me.

 

[blueta2]

You'll do great....good luck on Thursday

 

[gotmilk]

those nerds are hiring you because it will be the closest they come to actual boobs

 

[heatherrae]

So how did you do that? You just actually put in your focus statement on your resume that you seek a high paying job in which you do nothing but surf the web? I gotta try that....lol.

 

[AAP]

what exactly does a technical writer do?

 

[stilleto]

what exactly does a technical writer do?

i can't really go into it. it's very technical. <-- technical writing right there.

 

[stilleto]

You'll do great....good luck on Thursday

thanks.
i'm thinking a really nice suit might be all i need.

 

[stilleto]

So how did you do that? You just actually put in your focus statement on your resume that you seek a high paying job in which you do nothing but surf the web? I gotta try that....lol.

focus statement?
was I supposed to put one of those on my resume?

 

[AAP]

i can't really go into it. it's very technical. <-- technical writing right there.

what are the qualifications?

 

[Sassy69]

tech writing -- depends on what they need written - but probably like you said - sales materials, training materials, etc. If you can explain things to people easily, then you are great tech writer.

 

[stilleto]

what are the qualifications?

damned if i know.
apparently, it's whatever i've been doing cause they seem super eager to interview me.
seriously, the company website looks like nerd porn.

 

[anthrax]

Technical writer is an easy job
You can whatever you want because nobody is going to read it anyway

More seriously it is super ultra boring

 

[stilleto]

tech writing -- depends on what they need written - but probably like you said - sales materials, training materials, etc. If you can explain things to people easily, then you are great tech writer.

explain things? sure, if'n i understand what i'm explaining.
hold on, i'll pm you their website. maybe you can tell me wtf they make.

 

[stilleto]

Technical writer is an easy job
You can whatever you want because nobody is going to read it anyway

More seriously it is super ultra boring

can i put sloppy sex scenes in it?
apparently, this job involves travel too. it better be to GOOD places.

 

[Spartacus]

I love your little dog
I love you too
I love

 

[stilleto]

I love your little dog
I love you too
I love

*slurp*
that means a lot in dog-speak.

 

[Spartacus]

 

[stilleto]

ooh. i just heard on the news... the CIA is hiring.

 

[Spartacus]

I Have 13 million to give away

 

[stilleto]

I Have 13 million to give away

i wouldn't be worthy of it if i now said, "i love you too."
that would be shameful.

like the karma equivalent of a gold digger. a karma digger.

 

[stilleto]

that dog is a poodle.
i like them when they are mixed with other dogs.
kinda like gin mixed with tonic. mmmm.

 

[Spartacus]

I took a shot at hammy
came up short
now the karma goes back into the pool
everybody gets some
greybeards and newbies
conservatives and liberals
boys and girls
fat and thin

 

[stilleto]

I took a shot at hammy
came up short
now the karma goes back into the pool
everybody gets some
greybeards and newbies
conservatives and liberals
boys and girls
fat and thin

yay, i know i'm in there somewhere.
you were at the top. don't forget that.

 

[stilleto]

and if you say "only temporarily", remember

it's all temporary.

 

[Spartacus]

I'm not giving anymore to mother goose
she got 4 million back on mother's day may 06

 

[stilleto]

I'm not giving anymore to mother goose
she got 4 million back on mother's day may 06

Who's mother goose? alien amp pharm?

 

[headofpapa]

just looken to order gear....just joined elite fitness..don't know how to use the resorces ..can you help....thanks

 

[Spartacus]

 

[Spartacus]

my kitty loves me

 

[stilleto]

just looken to order gear....just joined elite fitness..don't know how to use the resorces ..can you help....thanks

i can tell you what not to do.
don't ask about ordering gear on one of my threads about a job.
and don't ask about where to order gear, anywhere here at all.

 

[stilleto]

my kitty loves me

was that you? you're very pretty.

 

[Spartacus]

was that you? you're very pretty.

too pretty
Imagine that
it's hell

 

[stilleto]

too pretty
Imagine that
it's hell

yeah, i have that problem.



ok, no i don't.

 

[stilleto]

hey, wtf? i just realized *I* am mother goose.

 

[Spartacus]

 

[Spartacus]

there he is
holding down a pair of my pants

 

[stilleto]

cool pic.

mother goose my ass.

i mean, not "goose my ass". that's not right.

 

[Spartacus]

that dog is a poodle.
i like them when they are mixed with other dogs.
kinda like gin mixed with tonic. mmmm.

one of my sisters has a big black grand poodle
one of those big ones
Lucy
lucy and my mom's little poodle get along great
they just smile with their shit eating grins
heh

 

[Spartacus]

cool pic.

mother goose my ass.

i mean, not "goose my ass". that's not right.

I had a girlfriend comment once
"he guards you"

 

[healother]

i was serious about thinking that maybe I should look for a job.
ideally, i want to work part time and not very hard. I want some power, to make a decent amount of money (none of this $10 an hour shit), and work close to home. I want to be able to come and go as i please, and surf the net while at the office.

so i wrote up a resume.

surprisingly, there wasn't that many places for me to send it to, other than a really big company that's right near my house. i sent it there, as well as another place that's not far. neither said they had an actual job opening for what i want to do (nothing), but... the other place just wrote me and wants me to come in for an interview on thursday. to be a technical writer. they make some shit i never heard of, but apparently every nobel physics winner has.

I hope they don't want me to learn their product line. i might have to hire samoth and sassy to teach me.

or, you know, do my job for me.

i thnk you have the right idea. I also want a job that pays more than $10 per hour, where i dont have to do anything and can post on elite sometimes if I want

I wonder how hard this is to come by.

 

[stilleto]

i thnk you have the right idea. I also want a job that pays more than $10 per hour, where i dont have to do anything and can post on elite sometimes if I want

I wonder how hard this is to come by.

i'll let you know on thursday.
i didn't try very hard for this interview.

 

[stilleto]

i couldn't sleep last night. i'm worried i'm going to end up with a job i don't want.

 

[digimon7068]

Kiss a lot of butt AND SHOW THEM YOUR TITS & no one will care if you can do your job or not......

there. . .that's better

 

[Dial_tone]

Tell them you want an expense account and your boobs will need their own offices..and you bring the dogs to work...they might want offices too.

 

[healother]

i'll let you know on thursday.
i didn't try very hard for this interview.

lol, thats the spirit. trying hard for interviews is a waste of time. people are much more genuine when they dont work their ass off to impress someone else

 

[stilleto]

lol, thats the spirit. trying hard for interviews is a waste of time. people are much more genuine when they dont work their ass off to impress someone else

i'm trying to figure out what to wear.
i have a nice black pants suit. and a blue shirt to go under it. its a perfect interview suit.

which makes me think i shouldn't wear it cause they're gonna think i'm the serious, smart type.

i want to let them know that i'm not.

 

[healother]

i'm trying to figure out what to wear.
i have a nice black pants suit. and a blue shirt to go under it. its a perfect interview suit.

which makes me think i shouldn't wear it cause they're gonna think i'm the serious, smart type.

i want to let them know that i'm not.

hahaha. i hate the whole thing about having to worry about what to wear.
in the past ive been a suckup and worn a suit with a nice dressy shirt and tie, and now i hate it.
I think next time I'll just wear my khakis and a polo shirt and see what happens. As long as thats good enough for their regular dress code, then i dont see the point in dressing up more for an interview!

 

[stilleto]

here's what i've decided.

they're gonna offer me the job. I ace every interview, probably cause i can bullshit my way through anything.

i'll only take it IF:
i get my own office which i can decorate.
I get unmoderated access to the internet all day.
The pay is substantial.
The people seem cool. and ugly.

then, i'll work there until they realize i'm not actually doing anything. it took 15 years for that to happen at my last job.

 

[healother]

here's what i've decided.

they're gonna offer me the job. I ace every interview, probably cause i can bullshit my way through anything.

i'll only take it IF:
i get my own office which i can decorate.
I get unmoderated access to the internet all day.
The pay is substantial.
The people seem cool. and ugly.

then, i'll work there until they realize i'm not actually doing anything. it took 15 years for that to happen at my last job.

LOL

I'm amazed that so many people can get away with this.

I don't even like BSing in interviews though. So I have a harder time getting jobs than most people.

Did you get fired from your last job or laid off? What was your last job?

 

[stilleto]

LOL

I'm amazed that so many people can get away with this.

I don't even like BSing in interviews though. So I have a harder time getting jobs than most people.

Did you get fired from your last job or laid off? What was your last job?

i quit my last job. haven't worked in around 6 or 7 months.
i did a little of everything and a lot of nothing.

 

[healother]

i quit my last job. haven't worked in around 6 or 7 months.
i did a little of everything and a lot of nothing.

do you feel like it will be harder to get a job since you've been away from work for awhile?

what did you do for your last job? how well did they pay?

 

[stilleto]

do you feel like it will be harder to get a job since you've been away from work for awhile?

what did you do for your last job? how well did they pay?

my official title changed with the wind. whatever i needed to be. marketing manager, art director, sales administrator.
i did ok. i never worked past 3pm, never took work home with me, never came in earlier than 9am. I often did absolutely nothing all day. I made btwn 40-50k.

 

[healother]

my official title changed with the wind. whatever i needed to be. marketing manager, art director, sales administrator.
i did ok. i never worked past 3pm, never took work home with me, never came in earlier than 9am. I often did absolutely nothing all day. I made btwn 40-50k.

dang, do you have a degree? where are you located?

 

[stilleto]

dang, do you have a degree? where are you located?

yeah, i have a masters of fine arts with a major in design.

i'm in the US, that's all i'll say.

 

[healother]

yeah, i have a masters of fine arts with a major in design.

i'm in the US, that's all i'll say.

how many times does one have to interview to find a job that easy and that pays that well?

i have a BA in psych, and im completely at a loss as what to do with my life.