the issue of WEIGHT.. with a chick.. how do you address it? do you?

[HelenSL]

First off is this your girlfriend or your wife?

I honestly believe that you need to sit down and say, "Please down be offended, but I must tell you how I feel." Express to her how important exercise and fitness is to you. And tell her straight out that you are afraid that if she gains more weight that you may become uninterested in her physically.

When you are telling her these things make sure that you are pointing out her good qualities as well.

You know it is very possible that she may also be worried about the relationship, which may be causing her to eat unhealthy foods.

Best of luck to you!!

Oooooh I really wanna hear that conversation! Please post a transcript of it...the one where he starts "Please don't be offended, but I really must tell you how I feel" etc etc

and then she, realizing this is 'honesty time' says: "Please don't be offended but I really must tell you how I feel"

That relationship's a goner!!!!!

By the time he's into his next one hopefully he'll have learned that people who really must tell the other person how they feel just aren't cut out for long-term relationships...

love
Helen

 

[FrankRizzo]

I realized this may not directly answer your post, but i think a woman looks her best when she is 10-20 pounds "overweight". To me this is an ideal weight. Todays standards are fucked up when it comes to the ladies. Women naturally carry a higher BF% than men, and we go and rave over women who are ripped. For a woman to achieve that is very admirable. They have to put a lot more work into than I do to accomplish those abs. But, for most, being ripped and defined is damn near an impossibility. Then these poor girls are left to feel unattractive and uncomfortable about themselves. I feel it is a shame that this situation exists.

 

[madbomber31]

funny how the guys kinda think like me and the girls want to have this "its ok to be a lard ass" attitude...

like i said... she and i have talked about it... i am very happy with her.. she is a great girl.. i cant do any better.. i know that... i would just like to have the same life style, thats all... no biggy... she also knows that if she doesnt want to lose any weight or if she doesnt want to work out... or if she thinks i should fuck off and die... all she has to do is say so... i wont fuck off AND die... i may fuck off, but i'd do that anyway.

 

[ryker77]

you should bring up the weight issue to her. it will lower her self esteem and then she will never leave you.

Not true. She'll be crying to her friends about how you think she's fat. The friends intuorn will tell her she can get better and it will be over.

Best thing is she'll never have a guy as good as me.

 

[theoak01]

i would be gentle about it and get her to goto the gym when you do and do some cardio with her,my gf play soccer and thats it,yet somehow has a six pac,damn women with abs turn me on

 

[gymnpoppa]

MadB

I talk to women all the time, and they always appreciate the body, but for some reason, they don't have the desire/dedication to be in the same type shape. We work hard on our bodies, why can't we expect the same? without being ostracized for it? The personal ads often are full of women who are overweight (according to their profile), yet they are listing their description of their ideal man.....basically a man who takes care of himself physically, mentally, and financially. I completely understand the latter two, but if you're not in shape, why would you list a ideal, dream male counterpart? This doesn't apply to Bmom, or other women who do offer nice packages. Even though this is a thread about how to approach the woman, it applies to men as well. If you offer the package, you shouldn't have a problem. Six-pks are nice, a turn-on. Nothing like a defined, fit woman.

 

[kitKat]

Okay this is what did it for me or at least made the light bulb come on in my head. My ex started working out and looking really good and I noticed the looks he was getting....I thought to myself "hmmm I better get with it or someone else will have his attention". I never was fat but I certainly was not in the shape I could have been. Now that was a while back and the reason we broke up was something other than looks. I now however have a lifestyle that is mine alone, I do it for myself and no one else.

I do agree with Bikinmom, things will happen as a women ages and has children. As you guys can see she is one women that wonderful example of looking great at any age. Just think if all your gf, wives, or ect aspired to keep in shape like her.

Also as FrankRizzo said it is going to be harder for her to have the same accomplishments you men have doing to same things in the gym. So in other words be understanding when she does set her mind to working out and looking good.

 

[MP5]

I would never start a relationship with a fat chick. Now if you had been dating awhile and she started gaining weight then you have to deal with it or dump her.