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social phobia/anxiety

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supershooter

New member
Im looking for some advice possibly from someone that has suffered this or someone that can give some advice on what to do about this problem. I have had it since I was around 14 and im now 25. Its starting to really affect my social and work life, down to the point where I am avoiding doing things that need to be done in my life. Any advice will be great.

Thanks
 
been going through it for a few years now. have been seeing psychiatrists in and out and have been on and off some meds. its tough. most days i walk out of my apartment building and walk with my head down because im always afraid people are saying things or talkin about me. i had to drop my speech class because of this and now have to take it in the summer. its hard to shake it. i was on xanax for a little and it really helped but the withdrawal and rebound effects are not worth it. i would try talking to a therapist because they arent all egoistic because they have a huge medical degree to blow you off with and just give you pills to take.
 
supershooter said:
Im looking for some advice possibly from someone that has suffered this or someone that can give some advice on what to do about this problem. I have had it since I was around 14 and im now 25. Its starting to really affect my social and work life, down to the point where I am avoiding doing things that need to be done in my life. Any advice will be great.

Thanks
Click to expand...

One of the best things for it is to try to keep breaking out of your comfort zone. Set some goals for yourself and if they seem too big break them down into smaller more managable ones. I also helps if you have someone to talk to (i.e. a family member, girl friend .....) that you can talk to and tell them what you are thinking and going through. A different perspective is always helpful. Also read up on social phobia, there is a ton of books out there dealing with your challenges. I hope this helps you. good luck!
 
those are the exact same things I have been going through. I also always think people are talking about me or I will mess something up and they will laugh at me. Same thing with the speech class, I was in actual pain going through that class, but I was able to suffer through it.
 
I agree on the goal setting,keep pushing it a little further and further,you will have set backs where you regress almost but in time it gets better,I went from being a guy who would shake and sweat and stutter while talking to people,to being confident and self assured by using this method,now im a bouncer,have been for three years,it was rough at first,because of this evil monkey on my back I sometimes couldnt communicate like a normal person and got into a few fights because id get frustrated and just get physical where now I can talk and be confident in what I do.

occasionally ive used lorazepam,but that was never before going out,always to calm me down and stop the insane thoughts so I could sleep.
 
I am probable an expert on this topic even though i haven't beaten it. there were days, weeks, even months where i didn't take a step outside of my house. The only thing that kept me sane was weight lifting, and friends i've met online. My advice to you is Don't let those negetive voices and fear keep you from living. You have to keep moving on even when you don't have the strength too. Last year this time i couldnt imagine that i would fly to California by myself or be going to school in Pa to become a auto mechanic. You just have to keep building off of small successes. Like today i drove, i havent driven a car in almost a year. That was a big deal to me, cause i need to be a good driver if i am going to be a mechanic.
Quit avoiding and start living. Life is so short. I wasted so much of my life already being afraid. I am not cured or anything like that, but i now have hope things can get BETTER.
i hope this helps you and it makes sense, i been away at school for 6 months now and forgotten how to write.
 
You can also find a therapist who's willing to work with your family doctor, or a psychiatrist (a shrink that can write prescriptions). You want one that has a speciality interest in social anxiety or agoraphobia (if you go to the website of the local hospitals you can usually search the staff, some of the hospital staff listing include the doctor's speciality interest). Try to avoid taking meds prescribed by a regular doctor (a general practioner or internist), without the therapy, it's not going to do you any real long term good. A two pronged approach is the best bet, you take the meds to get you over the hump, so the anxiety becomes less of an overwhelming issue in your life, you have the therapy to deal with the issues surrounding it. Find a therapist you like, one that meshes with YOUR personality. Therapy is so individualized, you NEED to be on the same wavelength, mentally.

Trust me, find a way to fix this, you don't want to become trapped in your house afraid to go out, afraid that the people passing you in their cars are amused at how ridiculous you look, or the elementary school kids are laughing at you, TRUST ME, DEAL WITH IT NOW. You don't get out and make friends now, when you're young, you're NOT GOING to have any when you're 40. You get to the point where YOU LIKE IT, where you can't relate to people, can barely stand your own species, you start prefering the company of animals, and the only humans you deal with are virtual.
 
have you been through this muscle mom? because im on that path. im slowly disassociating myself with people, i dont even leave my apartment. and all i do is talk online to people and go to the gym. when i was young i had more good friends than i could ever count.
 
markshark said:
have you been through this muscle mom? because im on that path. im slowly disassociating myself with people, i dont even leave my apartment. and all i do is talk online to people and go to the gym. when i was young i had more good friends than i could ever count.
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Mark, what happened to your friends? :worried: Y'see I NEVER had more than five or so at a time (I was a major freak and outcast in school) and my first husband disconnected me from all my friends when I married him, he didn't approve of them. You'll notice I said first ... when we divorced he got custody of all the friends we made DURING the marriage. It's so impossible to build good friendships when you already have kids, your job doesn't give you social contacts, and you don't belong to a group or church.

But yeah, I'm real close to being disconnected. I don't know if I have agoraphobia, social anxiety or I'm a natural born hermit, I used to have panic attacks and was on Xanax for a while, that's cleared out, but my life is very sheltered, and yet there's a part of me that's just overwhelmed. Take today, a beautiful day, PERFECT weather, we're only gonna get a few more like these, and it STILL took me two times to get the moxie up to tie on my sneakers and go for a nice walk.

Disassociate is a good word, you want to find a way to be connected, at least to find and build some good friendships, because it's nearly impossible to make friends once you get past a certain age.

My problems run deeper than just phobia, that's the worst part, I have chemical problems and apparently a nose like a bloodhound. I'm sensitive to perfumes and colognes, and I can smell the damndest things ... I am a freak, no question. If it weren't for the virtual world I'd have no contact with humans other than my husband ...

But I kind of know how I ended up here, I was isolated as a child, isolated as a young wife and mother, isolated in my last job and isolated in my current job. I've kind of lost the touch for staying connected, I get too wrapped up in people's lives, care too much and it stresses me emotionally ... what cut you off?
 
I was diagnosed with Generalized anxiety disorder, but i dont have anything close to what you guys have. i wish you all the best of luck. I think forums such as this are good for people to reach out with similar problems and aspirations.

mike
 
Medication can help but I think it's inifinitely more helpful if you see a therapist who can teach you coping strategies for dealing with that kind of anxiety.

I've dealt with a whole mess of mental issuse for as long as I can remember. I have generalized anxiety and panic disorder. It can be crippling. Sometimes it's really hard for me to function anywhere near normally at work. When things are a little more under control with me I can go out and be around people and be fine. But sometimes it puts me in a total state of terror for no reason.

It's a really frustrating thing to deal with since it's not rational. There's help out there though if you want it. I'm not "normal' by any means but at least I know I'm trying.
 
Raina said:
Medication can help but I think it's inifinitely more helpful if you see a therapist who can teach you coping strategies for dealing with that kind of anxiety.

...

It's a really frustrating thing to deal with since it's not rational. There's help out there though if you want it. I'm not "normal' by any means but at least I know I'm trying.
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I didn't intend this to be as long as it turned out but it's sort of a stream of consciousness thing ...

Raina, I'm surprised at how many people on the board have social issues (percentage wise ... I guess I thought it was one of those rarities, but I'm thinking I was wrong). Weight training is almost an antisocial sport, isn't it? I guess it's one of the reasons why it's always been something I've enjoyed. There is no true competition, except with yourself, even if you're working out with the goal of competing in a BB/fig/fit contest, the real competion is against yourself, the determination to do the cardio, sticking with the regimen of working out, the dieting, that's all more of a personal challenge and a test of personal determination.

But to your statement and what I'm trying to say to the others, it's much easier to try to fix this problem (agoraphobia, panic disorder, social anxiety) when you're younger (and I'm not trying to be dismissive of what anyone who's living with this right now is dealing with), first of all, youth brings resilience, but also you'd be surprised how you can craft your life to slowly cut yourself off from people ... I'm at the point now where, between the kind of job I have, what my financial situation is, where my relationship is -- I really DON'T need to set foot outside the door ... EVER ... I have the internet for shopping, reference, and virtual contact with the human species, I have a very complete weight training setup in the basement, two types of cardio equipment, my cats, and for anything needed that I can't order from the internet -- like grocery shopping -- my husband is sweet about picking things up. I don't need to fix this anymore, it really doesn't matter.

Oh, there is a plus side, my anxiety levels have reduced 500% (I used to either get shooting pains in my stomach, have IBS or be nauseous and vomiting before going to work, and that was when I worked in a TINY office, just me and three other people and I was left alone most of the day. Then I went and accepted a position in a county job and was one of 20 people in the office, and I lost 5 lbs. in two days ... I was back to having panic attacks walking down the hall to the office ... I had to resign, I just couldn't take it).

On the minus ... I guess the best way to sum it up is to tell you simply that when I buried my mom last year my best friends were reduced in number by half; the only real best friend I have now is my husband. It would be nice to have someone to go shopping with (it's such a chick thing) I know that sounds stupid but ... you know how it's fun to go shopping with a friend looking for just that perfect gift for your kid or your husband? I really miss that ... :( (for guys, think of watching your favorite team in a really important kick ass game ... alone versus with your best buddy).

And I loathe the holidays ... it really blows at Thanksgiving and Christmas, both my husband and I are only children, we have NO close family, and he doesn't have any friends either (he didn't get custody of any friends in the divorce, either). I hate the holidays, I hate having it shoved down my throat at every t.v. special and every commercial that I have nobody to cook for and nobody to sit down and enjoy a meal with other than my husband and son, and my son is young man moving on with his life. I don't want him to end up like me, disconnected and isolated, and I refuse to play the guilt mom martyr trip. If he wants to spend the holidays at a friends house or with his father I really want him to have a good time.

I have to stop this ... this isn't a good week for me anyway but I'm getting myself awfully maudlin ... what I'm really trying to point out is that it is POSSIBLE to live a life that's very isolated, situations and even you yourself can disconnect you from people and it can happen in such subtle ways, over the course of a long time, that one day you turn around and go, "I'm alone, I have no one to share this with," and when you get old enough you go, "f**k it, what's the difference," and this is a precarious existance. I have NO support system, no one to turn to, no sounding board.

So if someone out there reads this and goes, crap, that's what I'm doing to myself ... you don't want to be here, fix it while you can and while the fixing will make a difference. It's not going to make any difference if I fix it in my life now, that's the point I'm trying to make. I'll just be isolated and wishing I had friends and feeling REALLY lonely ... because how do you go out and build solid friendships when you're in your 40s or 50s??? Think about it. It doesn't happen, trust me. Other people are either raising their kids or their stepkids, getting those kids through college, and doing this while taking care their home, maybe a vacation home, and definitely their parents who are usually in failing health and their parents house, meanwhile their jobs are on the fasttrack to sock that last bit of cash into the 401K before they hit their 60s ... I'm at the time of life when friendships generally get a little sidelined but they're still there. Good, solid friendships can last through the dry season; people still get together for holidays and special occasions. Down the road these friendships rebloom when there's time to apply energy to them, but you don't go out and build these kinds of friendships now, it's just too late. People in my age group are just too busy to add new relationships to their lives, it's too much of a distraction and calls for too much energy.

So, guys, do you want a reason to take care of your social anxiety disorder? Do it when you're young and going out and meeting new friends is something you can do ... becuse if you don't, you better decide right now that you are comfortable with being an island, you'll be okay spending a lot of time inside your own head, and you can be your own best counsel.
 
thats what i wonder about though sometimes, musclemom. like you described how you can be your own island. slowly i have stopped speaking and socializing in public (im 23 and havent went out for over 2 years, whereas i was always partying and having fun in highschool) and im happy by myself. but you have to force yourself to go out into public because you have to go to your job, or class, or to get food. the more i stop trying to contend with peers and interact in society the more i want to be alone and long to live by myself one day. for some reason i have become an introvert.
 
reck said:
One of the best things for it is to try to keep breaking out of your comfort zone. Set some goals for yourself and if they seem too big break them down into smaller more managable ones. I also helps if you have someone to talk to (i.e. a family member, girl friend .....) that you can talk to and tell them what you are thinking and going through. A different perspective is always helpful. Also read up on social phobia, there is a ton of books out there dealing with your challenges. I hope this helps you. good luck!
Click to expand...

This is what I did. I suffered anxiety at my last job. So much so it lead to a severe case of depression that I never sough treatement for. I handled it on my own and came out of it (running helped ALOT).
 
markshark said:
thats what i wonder about though sometimes, musclemom. like you described how you can be your own island. slowly i have stopped speaking and socializing in public (im 23 and havent went out for over 2 years, whereas i was always partying and having fun in highschool) and im happy by myself. but you have to force yourself to go out into public because you have to go to your job, or class, or to get food. the more i stop trying to contend with peers and interact in society the more i want to be alone and long to live by myself one day. for some reason i have become an introvert.
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Exactly, you hit the nail right on the head, the less you interact with other people, the less you want to interact with people and then less they want to interact with you. When you're older, like me, your kids are grown, you have a loving spouse and a career, that's one thing ... but you're a very young man to be isolating yourself now when you should be out having the best time of your life.

PM me if you'd like to chat :) You bring out the Mom in me, Mark, you're only a little older than my own son (he'll be turning 21 very shortly).
 
I'm so glad to hear you guys discuss this. I thought I was a rare freak with my social anxiety. It's nice to know that it's more common than I thought. My social anxiety is weird because sometimes I do some of the most extroverted things. I entered an amateur male stripper contest one time. That's not something a shy social phoboc person does. However, if I have to converse with someone I don't know very well, I start sweating buckets and basically freak out. It's killed my social life. Women think I'm stuck up because I don't talk a lot. I've honestly never had a long term relationship with a female. It also holds my career back. There have been times when I passed on better jobs simply because I was afraid of having to meet new people.

I'm trying to change things. I just applied for a transfer at work to an area that's 2500 miles from my home now. It scares me to death but I want to do it. Maybe if I jump in the deep end and start facing all of my fears, things will get better for me.
 
I also have social anxiety. I can´t talk to girls that I find attractive. If I see a girl that looks good my heart beats fast and I almost can´t look at her.
 
I went through a particularly stressful period and my doctor prescribed a short acting beta blocker called metoprolol. It blocks the receptors that cause your heart rate to increase and in general really smooths you out without any addiction, rebound, or side effects. It was a super small dose so small that the pharmacy had to special order the pills and then I had to break them in half.

Interesting drug. It turns you into a cool customer in the most critically stressful of situations.
 
Mike_83 said:
I also have social anxiety. I can´t talk to girls that I find attractive. If I see a girl that looks good my heart beats fast and I almost can´t look at her.
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Try the beta-blocker. Just tell your doctor and he should be more than willing to try it.
 
nuevo laredo said:
Try the beta-blocker. Just tell your doctor and he should be more than willing to try it.
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not trying to sound like a know it all, but that beta-blocker, is that in any way relation to meds like zoloft? i know my doc had me on that only like a half a pill a day and had to quit it after 4 days i had the worst stomach aches ever, sweats and during the day walked around like i was out of it (not drowsy, just like everything was a daydream, like shit didnt even seem real around me) and insomnia.
 
I see that I am not alone either, feels good. I think I may have Asperger's Syndrome(AS). I have taken online tests for it and have failed so I believe I have it, it has some positive elements 2 it though(increased concentration,intelligence).
 
markshark said:
not trying to sound like a know it all, but that beta-blocker, is that in any way relation to meds like zoloft? i know my doc had me on that only like a half a pill a day and had to quit it after 4 days i had the worst stomach aches ever, sweats and during the day walked around like i was out of it (not drowsy, just like everything was a daydream, like shit didnt even seem real around me) and insomnia.
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Totally different class of drugs than SSRIs (which Zoloft belongs to). Beta blockers are not a psych drug, they are used to block the receptors in your vascular system that respond to adrenalin. Just go to www.rxlist.com and lookup Metoprolol.
 
nuevo laredo said:
I went through a particularly stressful period and my doctor prescribed a short acting beta blocker called metoprolol. It blocks the receptors that cause your heart rate to increase and in general really smooths you out without any addiction, rebound, or side effects.
Click to expand...

Generally propranolol is better. Metoprolol crosses the blood-brain barrier and has been known to cause depression. Propranolol has the added benefit of less selectivity of the beta receptors, thereby eliminating tremors as much.

Any beta blocker will decrease your heart rate, the force of contraction of your heart (inotropy), and hand tremors (the jitters), giving you a sense of calm. This is why they work so well in social situations, especially if you have an isolated phobia (i.e., public speaking).

If your anxiety disorder is generalized, then an SSRI like paroxetine (Paxil) would be ideal until you are able to get counseling and overcome your anxiety naturally.
 
I tend to be very withdrawn in social situations. I used to practice law, and I was not shy in court because I sort of had something planned to say. However, in social situations where I have to make small talk with strangers, I get very anxious. I read a book called "How to be a people magnet." I know it sounds stupid, but it gives suggestions about how to cope with making small talk, what to do if you walk in and know no one in a room, etc. It helped me. I also did toast masters group.

I don't know anything about the effectiveness of zoloft, paxil, etc. My self help remedies helped enough for me to get by in a pinch.
 
Stillhere7 said:
Why would anyone want to take dangerous drugs so that they can come out of their home?

Meditate
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You can't know until you walk a mile in another man's shoes whether they need the meds or not.
 
wow...ive been on this board for a year now and i never saw this thread...i have the same problems...i can leave my house and all but i guess i might not have it as bad as some of you...for example: sometimes when people call me i dont want to pick up the phone because i dont want to do anything...its not that i dont like them its just...i dunno...
 
HeatherRae said:
You can't know until you walk a mile in another man's shoes whether they need the meds or not.
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That sounds familiar.

I too have social phobia but I have learned to live with it; without using dangerous drugs with more side effects than winny.
 
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social phobia, agoraphobia

asperger's syndrome, schizoid personality disorder disorder, all are somewhat similar anyone ever go in for a diagnosis and if so what came of it. I would love to hear more about people's experiences with a psychologists treatment etc.
 
Stillhere7 said:
That sounds familiar.

I too have social phobia but I have learned to live with it; without using dangerous drugs with more side effects than winny.
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How did you learn to live with it? I am on meds and still I have a hard time leaving the house and talking to people.
 
salemlot said:
How did you learn to live with it? I am on meds and still I have a hard time leaving the house and talking to people.
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you don't. you get numb to it & maybe find a routine that isn't threatening. or you do like i do and become a pill popper. but one thing, bud, it ain't your fault. you don't deserve it & you didn't ask for it. don't ever forget that.
 
musclemom said:
You get to the point where YOU LIKE IT, where you can't relate to people, can barely stand your own species
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I've ventured into that mental territory, but I'm not sure that I as an individual am entirely to blame for those episodes, since a basic comparison of our lot to various times in history reveals the extent of the shortcomings of modern Western homo sapiens as a whole, making it easier to withdraw. I'm referring to obesity, toxins in food, an aging population, environmental pollution, egotism, materialism, narcissism, conformity, stress- and for what? To live comfortably, and breed even more wasteful generations. No noble ideals whatsoever.

I know it's not right to paint things with such sweeping brushes (and in so doing pretentiously exalt oneself above it all), but it is difficult to adopt a mindset where you are non-judgemental and blindly respectful towards anyone and everyone, all day and all night, while underneath you want to lash out at others' depravity. It can eat away at your soul, and makes it all the easier just to avoid unnecessary social interaction.
 
I am really confused at this point, I believe that I have multiple phobias. I do have social phobias that cause anxiety, but I am also very depressed and feel like I dont belong in society. I am finding it very hard to leave the house now and Im not working. Im terrified that I will never make something out of my life and I will end up being that crazy and weird middle aged man living with his parents. I sleep about two hours a night because my mind is constantly racing and I am embarassed to say this but sometimes I just sit and cry about how screwed I am.
 
so has anyone tried therapy for their phobias and saw an improvement? Meds work long term? I am long overdue, I am 27 now and need professional help and some kind of diagnosis.
 
Same here, Im turning 26 this month and have never pursued therapy or meds. I kept thinking it was going to go away on its own but I guess its not. I have grown up wanting to be a Fireman and I knew that if I ever went to therapy that would be it for me ever following my dream, I would never be able to pass a background investigation. But my life is so bad right now I guess it doesnt matter any longer and I am going to need some help with my problems to even hope for any kind of regular life, let alone the perfect one. Any suggestions are welcome.

Thank You.
 
you guys are both young. you life is far but wasted. you would be amazed what a couple of months could do, how much can change and how much of that can be done by a handful of complete strangers. you've got to take a step towards something, though. whether it be some therapy, going to your local community mental health agency and asking them for help, etc. you can get help for free. there are a lot of people out there that are willing and will gladly try to help you. fuck, it's what i do for a living now, after going thru exactly what you 2 fellows just described. you need anything, PM me.
 
I am in the process of setting up an appointment with a psychologist that was recommended to me by a family member. Hope it helps me. It seems like a very nice guy and he says I can call him anytime, day or night when I feel like I need someone to talk to.
 
supershooter said:
I am in the process of setting up an appointment with a psychologist that was recommended to me by a family member. Hope it helps me. It seems like a very nice guy and he says I can call him anytime, day or night when I feel like I need someone to talk to.
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good to hear. hang in there, as gay as that sounds...
 
HumanTarget said:
good to hear. hang in there, as gay as that sounds...
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Doesnt sound gay, I appreciate that there are people that care. There are a lot of people out there that dont give a damn about anyone but themselves, glad that you guys are posting. I will let you know how the visit goes.

Thanks
 
supershooter said:
Doesnt sound gay, I appreciate that there are people that care. There are a lot of people out there that dont give a damn about anyone but themselves, glad that you guys are posting. I will let you know how the visit goes.

Thanks
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cool. i'll be waitin'. good luck.
 
well, guys, i had my appointment on Wed. wasn't as bad as i thought it might be. the only part i was uncomfortable with was sitting in a waiting room with plenty of droolers & having an office full of sexy women on the other side of the glass.
it's not what you might think. no laying on a couch talking about Mom. just basically asked what brought me this way. and when the subject of meds came up, everything was explained in detail. pretty cool, understanding what a compound does and why. and also why the others i took wouldn't work. so, i hope you guys are sticking to it. i feel a helluva lot better than i did 3 days ago. did i mention i hit 420 on the bench last night? woot. so, this stuff won't/shouldn't interfere with training....
 
So I had my first visit with the psychologist yesterday, he is a very nice guy but I dont think he is the one I will be seeing again. He asked a couple of questions and then let me talk, nothing spectacular. I was still holding up some what of a front, maybe its my fault it didnt go like I would have liked. Its hard for me to really tell someone all the things I am thinking and feeling.
 
supershooter said:
So I had my first visit with the psychologist yesterday, he is a very nice guy but I dont think he is the one I will be seeing again. He asked a couple of questions and then let me talk, nothing spectacular. I was still holding up some what of a front, maybe its my fault it didnt go like I would have liked. Its hard for me to really tell someone all the things I am thinking and feeling.
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that's fine. i had a hard time talking about family/relationships, that type of stuff. next time, maybe write down what you would like to talk about. kinda plan it out, and tell him, eh, this is something i'd like to address. they usually ask if you prefer women or men and ethnicity before assigning someone to you......
 
newbiebynature said:
wow you guys got appointments that fast? they scheduled me for july 26th...hopefully its a good experience...
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yeah. you're in a big city atmosphere aren't you??? maybe thas' why?
 
could be...did you guys see psychiatrists or psychologists? my appointment is for a psychiatrist...could that be the reason maybe? oh yea and happy bday
 
newbiebynature said:
could be...did you guys see psychiatrists or psychologists? my appointment is for a psychiatrist...could that be the reason maybe? oh yea and happy bday
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thanks for that. um, i had to make a shitload of calls, and that was with a referal. it still took me a week to see someone, a psychiatrist. sometiimes it depends on your insurance. i have a lower eschelon insurer. if you have medicaid or medicare, that could be another reason...
 
when i called to make the appointment they had me call my insurance company to get a autorization code cuz i guess you need that when it comes to mental health...and the first 5 visits are covered then after that its a small copay...and no deductable...i dont think my insurance co. had anything to do for when i was scheduled
 
newbiebynature said:
when i called to make the appointment they had me call my insurance company to get a autorization code cuz i guess you need that when it comes to mental health...and the first 5 visits are covered then after that its a small copay...and no deductable...i dont think my insurance co. had anything to do for when i was scheduled
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u got a good deal. most people only see a shrink long enough to figure out a good med for them. that's what i plan on doing. i can't afford a $65 co-pay every 3 weeks. between my other docs, it's like a car payment...
 
C3bodybuilding said:
Lexapro works wonders. You will love it.
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it's pretty mild, compared to many of them. but i read that whole article and it has it's drawbacks.......we'll see.
 
lol @ them comparing depression like whales shit at the bottom of the ocean...i got my psychiatrist appointment this week. cant fuck wait man. thanks to all the peeps posting up their probs too...i thought i was the only 1
 
newbiebynature said:
lol @ them comparing depression like whales shit at the bottom of the ocean...i got my psychiatrist appointment this week. cant fuck wait man. thanks to all the peeps posting up their probs too...i thought i was the only 1
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bro, there are around 1500 views on this thread. a lot of guy/gals aren't ready to talk about it, let alone do anything about it. glad to see you are stoked about moving forward. everything that happens this week should be like a new experience afterwards....
 
i was on that med, i can't remember if it help me or not. The worse med i took is Paxil, the side effects when missing a day is horribile. Hopefully lexapro will help you better then it did me.
 
salemlot said:
i was on that med, i can't remember if it help me or not. The worse med i took is Paxil, the side effects when missing a day is horribile. Hopefully lexapro will help you better then it did me.
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the sides for stopping it are kinda scary. painful electric like shocks. not fun sounding.
 
HumanTarget said:
the sides for stopping it are kinda scary. painful electric like shocks. not fun sounding.
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tell me about it. i used to have to sleep all day to make them go away, any movement it felt like my brain was getting zapped. i wonder what causes that?
 
salemlot said:
tell me about it. i used to have to sleep all day to make them go away, any movement it felt like my brain was getting zapped. i wonder what causes that?
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withdrawals. they're a bitch. i've had a few episodes of dumping a med completely, it's not pretty.
 
newbiebynature said:
lol @ them comparing depression like whales shit at the bottom of the ocean...i got my psychiatrist appointment this week. cant fuck wait man. thanks to all the peeps posting up their probs too...i thought i was the only 1
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You are by far not the only one with these kind of problems, it is not uncommon for you to feel like that though, it seems that it is something we all think from one time to another. I did a google search for support forums a year ago and found forums with thousands of members that were in the same boat as me. I have always had some forum of anxiety and depression and would think to myself what a freak I was, like I had some special curse that no one else had, lay in bed and compare myself to "regular" people and hate myself for not feeling good or doing the things they do. There is a reason why pharmaceutical companies are in the psychological medication business and why psychiatrists have fancy houses and cars.
 
supershooter said:
You are by far not the only one with these kind of problems, it is not uncommon for you to feel like that though, it seems that it is something we all think from one time to another. I did a google search for support forums a year ago and found forums with thousands of members that were in the same boat as me. I have always had some forum of anxiety and depression and would think to myself what a freak I was, like I had some special curse that no one else had, lay in bed and compare myself to "regular" people and hate myself for not feeling good or doing the things they do. There is a reason why pharmaceutical companies are in the psychological medication business and why psychiatrists have fancy houses and cars.
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some people won't take their meds out of spite, i have a few guys at work who have done that. and they think they're perfectly normal. but they're not, they're quite bad off. a guy was showing me Scientology brochures, because they don't believe in medicating mental illnesses. it was kinda pissing me off, but what the hell am i supposed to do???
 
HumanTarget said:
some people won't take their meds out of spite, i have a few guys at work who have done that. and they think they're perfectly normal. but they're not, they're quite bad off. a guy was showing me Scientology brochures, because they don't believe in medicating mental illnesses. it was kinda pissing me off, but what the hell am i supposed to do???
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Well there are all different kinds of depression and anxiety, but it really comes down to two catagories in my opinion. There is Situational, as in you are depressed on where you are in life, work, relationships, weather, your dog died, you are stressed about an upcoming situation. Then there is just plain old crossed wires, and people cant help it, its not certain situations that cause it or trigger it. I have a little of both, sometimes I get really depressed/anxious over stuff thats just part of life, and that is where people start talking about religion being the cure or they give you someone advice like it can always be worse. I dont think that people should take psychological medication just for situational depression/anxiety, and thats what the Scientology BS is going after. But its a huge difference if you cant help it and you get depressed and anxious for no reason, it just happens. Some people need the meds, it keeps them alive and no one has the right to tell them different if it helps their situation.
 
supershooter said:
Well there are all different kinds of depression and anxiety, but it really comes down to two catagories in my opinion. There is Situational, as in you are depressed on where you are in life, work, relationships, weather, your dog died, you are stressed about an upcoming situation. Then there is just plain old crossed wires, and people cant help it, its not certain situations that cause it or trigger it. I have a little of both, sometimes I get really depressed/anxious over stuff thats just part of life, and that is where people start talking about religion being the cure or they give you someone advice like it can always be worse. I dont think that people should take psychological medication just for situational depression/anxiety, and thats what the Scientology BS is going after. But its a huge difference if you cant help it and you get depressed and anxious for no reason, it just happens. Some people need the meds, it keeps them alive and no one has the right to tell them different if it helps their situation.
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not all of these are life meds. a lot of people can stop taking them after some time and be fine.
 
HumanTarget said:
not all of these are life meds. a lot of people can stop taking them after some time and be fine.
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Yeah, thats why getting a good therapist is so important. The meds get you over the hump. I just cant get myself to start taking them, I guess I am afraid of all the side effects people talk about.
 
supershooter said:
Yeah, thats why getting a good therapist is so important. The meds get you over the hump. I just cant get myself to start taking them, I guess I am afraid of all the side effects people talk about.
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if you read that link, it kinda puts things in perspective. some things you can live with, some are unbearable. but you have to give them a chance.
 
well i went...wasnt really what i was expecting...it was pretty cool cuz he prescribed me ambien and trazodone for sleep and he also prescribed me lexapro for depression...he gave me the number of a good psychologist...seems like psychiatrists are only interested in the medicine aspect..
 
newbiebynature said:
well i went...wasnt really what i was expecting...it was pretty cool cuz he prescribed me ambien and trazodone for sleep and he also prescribed me lexapro for depression...he gave me the number of a good psychologist...seems like psychiatrists are only interested in the medicine aspect..
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Yeah, thats what I always heard about psychiatrists. They are really not in the talk therapy business, I guess some maybe different, but most will just put you on the meds they think you should be using and each visit will be a check up to see if the dose and meds are working for you, then adjust. To me it seems that seeing a psychologist and then the psychologist working with your general doctor to prescribe meds if needed is the best way to do it.
 
newbiebynature said:
well i went...wasnt really what i was expecting...it was pretty cool cuz he prescribed me ambien and trazodone for sleep and he also prescribed me lexapro for depression...he gave me the number of a good psychologist...seems like psychiatrists are only interested in the medicine aspect..
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hey. you took a step in addressing something you're not happy with. that's a good sign. you won't regret the fact that you tried. now give this stuff a chance. i'm taking Lexapro right now, it's pretty effective. and i'm not seeing any serious sides. hope the same for you.
 
i just wanted to bump this and see how everyone is doing. i know it's hard talking about these things in a forum, but sometimes it helps. i won't be saying much else on my situation, i've had the "go take your meds" or other jokes made at my expense recently. so i feel i shouldn't further open up for insults. i hope you bros are doing ok.....
 
im doin a little better i guess...i had a therapist appointment last week...it went ok...seemed like he was more interested in sizing me up than anything...kept asking what my workout routine was. its hit and miss i guess...ill try a different one in a few weeks, just gotta find the right one
 
newbiebynature said:
im doin a little better i guess...i had a therapist appointment last week...it went ok...seemed like he was more interested in sizing me up than anything...kept asking what my workout routine was. its hit and miss i guess...ill try a different one in a few weeks, just gotta find the right one
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hell, mine gave me homework. but it was good for me. got me away from the routine that helped me become the way i am. a decent therapist should at the least give you some answers.
 
HumanTarget said:
i just wanted to bump this and see how everyone is doing. i know it's hard talking about these things in a forum, but sometimes it helps. i won't be saying much else on my situation, i've had the "go take your meds" or other jokes made at my expense recently. so i feel i shouldn't further open up for insults. i hope you bros are doing ok.....
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Some people will never understand, or maybe they will, you never know when depression/anxiety will hit. As for me, I have been doing a little better, but I have been depressed about my hair. I was diagnosed with Alopecia Areata at the end of last year, which started with two bald patches, and now I dont have any hair left, so that doesnt really help me battle my depression. Some say its caused my stress.
 
supershooter said:
Some people will never understand, or maybe they will, you never know when depression/anxiety will hit. As for me, I have been doing a little better, but I have been depressed about my hair. I was diagnosed with Alopecia Areata at the end of last year, which started with two bald patches, and now I dont have any hair left, so that doesnt really help me battle my depression. Some say its caused my stress.
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people generally have the i'm ok, you're ok attitude. they won't give you a listen until their world crumbles. and typically, they're never responsible for holding it together in the first place.
 
well, this starts the 3 rd month of lexapro. i went thru a ton of sides and to be honest, don't feel a lick better. i'm just as depressed, maybe even worse, than i've ever been. i get xanax for anxiety, have been for 6 months now, and now they want to cut me off. worried about me getting addicted. well, too fucking late. i depend on them now. i can't understand how people expect to talk to you for 5-10 minutes and give you a bagful of pills and send you on your merry way. i get fucking headaches, everyday now, after not having any xanax in my system for X amount of hours. my range of emotions are angry to miserable. i don't feel like talking to anyone, i don't feel like doing anything. i have sex out of repitition, and have no real interest in it. in my free time, i do repetitive tasks or games on the pc, trying to avoid thinking about the next few minutes. 7 months straight of this shit. i've spent more time in waiting rooms than i have being treated. lack of the will to thrive.....
 
i feel physically ill from not taking any xanax. seriously, i feel like i should be in the hospital right now....
 
HumanTarget said:
i feel physically ill from not taking any xanax. seriously, i feel like i should be in the hospital right now....
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I guess its just like any other drug, your body wants and needs it now. I feel bad that you are going through such a hard time right now. Why have you not been taking Xanax?
 
supershooter said:
I guess its just like any other drug, your body wants and needs it now. I feel bad that you are going through such a hard time right now. Why have you not been taking Xanax?
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cuz i feel hasseled by the doctors who prescribed it to me. i use 1-2 mg's a day. they don't give me but 60/.50mg tabs a month. not really enough, i take them mostly to help bring me to sleep at night & occassionally during the day. i don't know why they prescribe you something for shit with no real cure.
 
I had the same problem (social anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder and panic attacks) and I was treated with 20mg Paxil for 9 months and a bit of lorazepam for the first three months.

Worked great, virtually no recurrence.
 
oh yeah. damn. here goes round 5. i got switched to Celexa, supposedly an older version of Lexapro. apparently won't leave me as manic or hyper. i was so wound up at the end of the day, i couldn't sleep. but i haven't really noticed a change, cuz i'm taking a mg of xanax a night still. the fucking moodswings are whats doing the most damage. i'm still feeling really depressed on anti-depressants. maybe i'm mis- diagnosed???
 
HumanTarget said:
oh yeah. damn. here goes round 5. i got switched to Celexa, supposedly an older version of Lexapro. apparently won't leave me as manic or hyper. i was so wound up at the end of the day, i couldn't sleep. but i haven't really noticed a change, cuz i'm taking a mg of xanax a night still. the fucking moodswings are whats doing the most damage. i'm still feeling really depressed on anti-depressants. maybe i'm mis- diagnosed???
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To me it sounds like these meds are not helping you, actually hurting you, and maybe you should do what is best to try and stop taking them.
 
newbiebynature said:
could be...did you guys see psychiatrists or psychologists? my appointment is for a psychiatrist...could that be the reason maybe? oh yea and happy bday
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it's not uncommon for a psychiatrist to not have appts available for 3-4 weeks (or more). psychologists and other therapists tend to have more open schedules, plus they tend to work outside the normal 8am-4pm hours. psychiatrists often work part-time and arent flexible with scheduling plus they have a lot more patients.
 
supershooter said:
Some people will never understand, or maybe they will, you never know when depression/anxiety will hit. As for me, I have been doing a little better, but I have been depressed about my hair. I was diagnosed with Alopecia Areata at the end of last year, which started with two bald patches, and now I dont have any hair left, so that doesnt really help me battle my depression. Some say its caused my stress.
Click to expand...
caused BY stress typically (or can be). which in turn causes more stress.
 
HumanTarget said:
oh yeah. damn. here goes round 5. i got switched to Celexa, supposedly an older version of Lexapro. apparently won't leave me as manic or hyper. i was so wound up at the end of the day, i couldn't sleep. but i haven't really noticed a change, cuz i'm taking a mg of xanax a night still. the fucking moodswings are whats doing the most damage. i'm still feeling really depressed on anti-depressants. maybe i'm mis- diagnosed???
Click to expand...
not uncommon to go through a whole miriad of different medications before arriving at a medication or course of medications that works best (or best of the worst in some cases). thing is, it is very dependent upon having a competent doctor. how many doctors (psychiatrists) have you seen? honeslty, they get paid A LOT of money for those short visits. if you feel like youre not getting quality care, I'd seek out another provider. call your insurance company.
 
Smurfy said:
not uncommon to go through a whole miriad of different medications before arriving at a medication or course of medications that works best (or best of the worst in some cases). thing is, it is very dependent upon having a competent doctor. how many doctors (psychiatrists) have you seen? honeslty, they get paid A LOT of money for those short visits. if you feel like youre not getting quality care, I'd seek out another provider. call your insurance company.
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i have HAP, which is worse than BC/BS, imo. they may as well ask me to take a homeopathic route. it's funny that the insurance companies seem to have the final say in what you get, script wise.
 
HumanTarget said:
i have HAP, which is worse than BC/BS, imo. they may as well ask me to take a homeopathic route. it's funny that the insurance companies seem to have the final say in what you get, script wise.
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oh youre talking about medical insurance/pharmacy coverage for your scripts. i was talking about the option of finding a different doctor if youre not entirely satisfied with the quality of care youre receiving (I have no idea if you are or arent, just mentioning this as an option). and oh yes, insurance coverage will dictate what meds they prescribe for you in many cases, unless you want to pay out of pocket for something that isnt covered, thats an option too.
 
Smurfy said:
oh youre talking about medical insurance/pharmacy coverage for your scripts. i was talking about the option of finding a different doctor if youre not entirely satisfied with the quality of care youre receiving (I have no idea if you are or arent, just mentioning this as an option). and oh yes, insurance coverage will dictate what meds they prescribe for you in many cases, unless you want to pay out of pocket for something that isnt covered, thats an option too.
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my PC referred me to a shrink. and yes, like you said earlier, these guys can see 20 patients in an hour, easily. you really have to state your case quickly and eloquently to get them to stop/change a med for you. the therapist thing, well i did that for about 10 months, and after a while, i just thought it was gay. must be the man in me, i don't really enjoy sitting around talking about my feelings.
 
quality and competence varies GREATLY between doctors. There are many Ive come into contact with through my job that I wouldnt send anyone to. Just purely inadequate physicians. And that's just by having a short conversation over the phone. Frankly, Ive come into contact with very few who I'd say are good and who provide true quality care to their patients. Most just seem to shuffle patients in and out rather quickly. It's unfortunate and disenchanting. Luckily, I found a good doctor (excellent actually) for my son whom I am confident in.
 
Smurfy said:
quality and competence varies GREATLY between doctors. There are many Ive come into contact with through my job that I wouldnt send anyone to. Just purely inadequate physicians. And that's just by having a short conversation over the phone. Frankly, Ive come into contact with very few who I'd say are good and who provide true quality care to their patients. Most just seem to shuffle patients in and out rather quickly. It's unfortunate and disenchanting. Luckily, I found a good doctor (excellent actually) for my son whom I am confident in.
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that reminds me of my time in the emergency room. the doctor that operated on me was from Columbia and had an entire wall of framed accomplishments. the doctor who operated on the guy that died, he liked to say "like" and "dude" a lot.
 
musclemom said:
Mark, what happened to your friends? :worried: Y'see I NEVER had more than five or so at a time (I was a major freak and outcast in school) and my first husband disconnected me from all my friends when I married him, he didn't approve of them. You'll notice I said first ... when we divorced he got custody of all the friends we made DURING the marriage. It's so impossible to build good friendships when you already have kids, your job doesn't give you social contacts, and you don't belong to a group or church.

But yeah, I'm real close to being disconnected. I don't know if I have agoraphobia, social anxiety or I'm a natural born hermit, I used to have panic attacks and was on Xanax for a while, that's cleared out, but my life is very sheltered, and yet there's a part of me that's just overwhelmed. Take today, a beautiful day, PERFECT weather, we're only gonna get a few more like these, and it STILL took me two times to get the moxie up to tie on my sneakers and go for a nice walk.

Disassociate is a good word, you want to find a way to be connected, at least to find and build some good friendships, because it's nearly impossible to make friends once you get past a certain age.

My problems run deeper than just phobia, that's the worst part, I have chemical problems and apparently a nose like a bloodhound. I'm sensitive to perfumes and colognes, and I can smell the damndest things ... I am a freak, no question. If it weren't for the virtual world I'd have no contact with humans other than my husband ...

But I kind of know how I ended up here, I was isolated as a child, isolated as a young wife and mother, isolated in my last job and isolated in my current job. I've kind of lost the touch for staying connected, I get too wrapped up in people's lives, care too much and it stresses me emotionally ... what cut you off?
Click to expand...

is it hereditary?
 
blueta2 said:
Dr's have no proof, but if this is any indication. I have them, My Dad has them, My sister and my Aunts. Who knows really!
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i think it is, but any damage to the brain can bring this shit on.
 
HumanTarget said:
i think it is, but any damage to the brain can bring this shit on.
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I agree.....I got my first panic attack once I stopped doing drugs as a teen.
All I know is it's not important WHY, but how we overcome it
 
blueta2 said:
I agree.....I got my first panic attack once I stopped doing drugs as a teen.
All I know is it's not important WHY, but how we overcome it
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it's why i continue to do drugs now. fuck, if it weren't for the fact that i can take a pill and feel better, hell, i would have painted my walls with my brain by now.
 
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