Bro, I NEVER ask for sympathy. I think anyone that knows me personally knows that I HATE when others try to feel sorry for me. With all the shit I've dealt with in the past year and a half, all I've ever wanted people to get out of it is that yes, you DO have the strength to do these things if you ever need to. Use me as an example if you need to of someone that has done what is right for those they care about. I don't need sympathy, I know that I've done what was needed to be done and I have tried my best to take care of those that needed me.
EnderJE - my grandmother passed away early Monday morning just a few days after hip surgery.
foreigngirl - it's ok and I will be fine. I promised myself I would NOT go into the alcohol induced binge I went into when my grandfather died. Of course, that was 8 years ago, I was only 20, and I took things a lot harder back then. Maturity and getting a little bit older has taught me a lot. The alcoholic binge, well, that's over as of tomorrow. I've had at least 1 drink every night this week, but that's because I'd rather celebrate life than mourn death. I'm alive and I can, so I will.
After the past few weeks of a fucked up gym schedule, I will hit the gym again Monday and use that time to clear my mind and keep on moving in life. Death is just a part of life. While I'll go on without them, both of my grandparents will never be forgotten.
Yeah, that's right, I said knit, go ahead and laugh, but it's so hip right now. Saw a cute shrug @ Urban Outfitters I liked, but why spend $54 on something I can make in a few hours with $4 worth of yarn?
It's like a huge trend. I get together with this group of chicks (all of us in our 20s and cute!) once a week or so, we all meet at a coffee house or somewhere like that and knit and gossip while doing so. We get so much attention from guys it's not even funny. We went to a bar once on a Thursday evening, people there didn't know what to think of us.
It comes in handy if you have ADHD. I have so many scarves and stuff I made during class in college, otherwise I couldn't pay attention.
I tried my best to keep the mood light today, especially with my one sister who was hit with this very hard. My brother, the man of 5 words, was ready to start crying when I said goodbye to him today. I spared him and didn't let the moment go on longer than it needed to. I told him to call me if he just needed to talk, and that I'd be here. Someone out of the 4 of us has to be the "strong one" and I'm taking that role as the oldest sibling.
Everyone that I met today, people that I havn't seen for over 20 years, all thanked me for everything I did for my grandmother. It was good to hear those things, but even if no one said a word, I know what I did for her.
My dad's mother told me that she really wishes she had grandchildren like me. My dad's parents don't need grand children like me....they have 6 living sons and 1 daughter that would do everything for their parents that I did for my grandmother.