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Need some help with the GF

artrius

artrius

New member
Ok ok ok, heres the deal. My gf doesn't want to have sex very often any more. Hell, she doesn't even bug me for oral like she used to, which is very odd. She said it wasn't anything personal, but I'm not so sure. Even if its, not, its been going on for a few weeks now. I can go without sex fine, but it IS a good thing, and I happen to like it... so, any of you have any ideas of getting her in the mood in a regular basis? I know all the romantic stuff is good, but even that doesn't work very well.

For example, when she was asleep, I went out and got a rose in a small vase, some rose petals, and a big teddy bear (about 2.5 ft tall). I had it set up with the bear sitting in the middle of my round table with the rose vase in between the bear's legs and the rose petals surrounding the bear and vase, all around the table. She has a fetish for guys in the cami uniform (you know, the camoflauge stuff), so I went and bought a set for her. I put that on, woke her up, and had her close her eyes as I led her to the table. I then took the rose and gently grazed her skin with the rose, all over her body. After that, I had her open her eyes, and I presented the rose to her, and put it in the vase. She loved every second of it, and was extremely happy... but still, she wasn't in the mood for anything other than cuddleing.

Am I doing something wrong? Any ideas? I'm confused :xeye: :confused:
 
oh yeah, and then after that, I made her home cooked vegetarian lasagna, which, if I say so myself, came out pretty damned good.
 
How long have you been together? I hope she's not getting it somewhere else. :Chef: :tuc:
 
chefbone said:
How long have you been together? I hope she's not getting it somewhere else. :Chef: :tuc:
Click to expand...


Definite possibility. Also I'm not sure how long you have been with her but when girls get things like yeast infections, they can get pretty self conscious about themselves and may not want to tell you about it. Plus you'd rather not go there if that's what she has anyways
 
Delinquent said:
Definite possibility. Also I'm not sure how long you have been with her but when girls get things like yeast infections, they can get pretty self conscious about themselves and may not want to tell you about it. Plus you'd rather not go there if that's what she has anyways
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He should just talk to her and see what's up. Man up to the responsibilities of having a woman. They want you to ask ?'s and shit. They want you to care. :Chef: :tuc:
 
yeah, man, gotta talk to her. Ask her whats up. She'll tell you when she sees that you care. Just dont make it sound like you are desperate for sex
 
Screw it. It's stories like these that make me think I'm more fortunate than I realize.
 
I've been talking to her, and we have very good communication in our relationship, and she swears its that she just doesn't need it. Also, we've been officially a couple for a month, but dated for 2 or so months before that. She lives with me now, so she can't really go anywhere without me since she can't drive (so that means she isn't cheating on me). I guess I'll try not pursuing sex for a while. :(
 
artrius said:
I've been talking to her, and we have very good communication in our relationship, and she swears its that she just doesn't need it. Also, we've been officially a couple for a month, but dated for 2 or so months before that. She lives with me now, so she can't really go anywhere without me since she can't drive (so that means she isn't cheating on me). I guess I'll try not pursuing sex for a while. :(
Click to expand...

That's incredilby selfish of her unless it's because of religious beliefs. How does she expect you to get satisfaction? She should at least jerk you off. Pretty soon you'll be looking for it on the side.
 
Isnt this a red flag or something? I mean...you're not even married yet ;)
Hmm that's pretty selfish not satisfying you saying that 'she doesn't need it'
 
I would be up front and ask her. If she isn't experiencing any stress (mental, emotional or physical) or some other logical reason. Then she is either getting it from someone else or she isn't into you any more and is bored. When I started thinking about posts on EF during sex, I knew it was time to end the relationship.

That said, isn't this the chick that was confused about being with you or going back to her ex?
 
nycgirl said:
I would be up front and ask her. If she isn't experiencing any stress (mental, emotional or physical) or some other logical reason. Then she is either getting it from someone else or she isn't into you any more and is bored. When I started thinking about posts on EF during sex, I knew it was time to end the relationship.
Click to expand...

Good point. Like I said, she isn't able to see anyone else right now, because she lives with me, and she can't drive. She's kindof stuck at my place until I take her out. For the last part... you may be right, I don't know.

nycgirl said:
That said, isn't this the chick that was confused about being with you or going back to her ex?
Click to expand...

She's over that for good now. She acts like it, at least. She knows now that he was using her.
 
biteme said:
That's incredilby selfish of her unless it's because of religious beliefs. How does she expect you to get satisfaction? She should at least jerk you off. Pretty soon you'll be looking for it on the side.
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word, biteme got a goo dhead(on his shoulders) i love his posts.

sounds like u got fat orb
 
SublimeZM said:
word, biteme got a goo dhead(on his shoulders) i love his posts.

sounds like u got fat orb
Click to expand...

I even asked her that, you know, the whole "don't be afraid to hurt my feelings, I want the truth" shpeel, and she said she didn't care about that. :whatever:
 
one month and no sex?? very odd. def. something is wrong (more than "i just dont feel like it")

at that stage in the game, you should be having all sorts of fun sex
 
Smurfy said:
one month and no sex?? very odd. def. something is wrong (more than "i just dont feel like it")

at that stage in the game, you should be having all sorts of fun sex
Click to expand...
Yep. Even if you've been living together a year, you should be getting it twice a week.
If she insists that there is nothing wrong, tell her that "Men in a relationship look at sex the same way women look at cuddling. Bottom line, if you don't want to have sex with me, & you don't care that I want to MAKE LOVE with you, that tells me you don't love me. Period."
 
hidngod said:
Yep. Even if you've been living together a year, you should be getting it twice a week.
If she insists that there is nothing wrong, tell her that "Men in a relationship look at sex the same way women look at cuddling. Bottom line, if you don't want to have sex with me, & you don't care that I want to MAKE LOVE with you, that tells me you don't love me. Period."
Click to expand...
lolol thatl mindfuck her.

its like entraptment

"If you love me....youl let me touch it"
 
artrius said:
Ok ok ok, heres the deal. My gf doesn't want to have sex very often any more. Hell, she doesn't even bug me for oral like she used to, which is very odd. She said it wasn't anything personal, but I'm not so sure. Even if its, not, its been going on for a few weeks now. I can go without sex fine, but it IS a good thing, and I happen to like it... so, any of you have any ideas of getting her in the mood in a regular basis? I know all the romantic stuff is good, but even that doesn't work very well.

For example, when she was asleep, I went out and got a rose in a small vase, some rose petals, and a big teddy bear (about 2.5 ft tall). I had it set up with the bear sitting in the middle of my round table with the rose vase in between the bear's legs and the rose petals surrounding the bear and vase, all around the table. She has a fetish for guys in the cami uniform (you know, the camoflauge stuff), so I went and bought a set for her. I put that on, woke her up, and had her close her eyes as I led her to the table. I then took the rose and gently grazed her skin with the rose, all over her body. After that, I had her open her eyes, and I presented the rose to her, and put it in the vase. She loved every second of it, and was extremely happy... but still, she wasn't in the mood for anything other than cuddleing.

Am I doing something wrong? Any ideas? I'm confused :xeye: :confused:
Click to expand...
Awww that is so sweet. Well it could be one of two things. She could be having sex drive issues in which case she should see a Dr. about it. The other thing your not going to like but she may want to break up with you and doesn't know how to do it. Only time I have ever been with a boyfriend and not wanted to have sex is near the end when I knew I wanted things to end.
 
superqt4u2nv said:
Awww that is so sweet. Well it could be one of two things. She could be having sex drive issues in which case she should see a Dr. about it. The other thing your not going to like but she may want to break up with you and doesn't know how to do it. Only time I have ever been with a boyfriend and not wanted to have sex is near the end when I knew I wanted things to end.
Click to expand...


I think its probably the first thing. She told me that even with her exes, she didn't have all that much sex (except for with the last one, where she felt the only way to make him happy and keep him was with sex). :whatever:
 
artrius said:
Ok ok ok, heres the deal. My gf doesn't want to have sex very often any more. Hell, she doesn't even bug me for oral like she used to, which is very odd. She said it wasn't anything personal, but I'm not so sure. Even if its, not, its been going on for a few weeks now. I can go without sex fine, but it IS a good thing, and I happen to like it... so, any of you have any ideas of getting her in the mood in a regular basis? I know all the romantic stuff is good, but even that doesn't work very well.

For example, when she was asleep, I went out and got a rose in a small vase, some rose petals, and a big teddy bear (about 2.5 ft tall). I had it set up with the bear sitting in the middle of my round table with the rose vase in between the bear's legs and the rose petals surrounding the bear and vase, all around the table. She has a fetish for guys in the cami uniform (you know, the camoflauge stuff), so I went and bought a set for her. I put that on, woke her up, and had her close her eyes as I led her to the table. I then took the rose and gently grazed her skin with the rose, all over her body. After that, I had her open her eyes, and I presented the rose to her, and put it in the vase. She loved every second of it, and was extremely happy... but still, she wasn't in the mood for anything other than cuddleing.

Am I doing something wrong? Any ideas? I'm confused :xeye: :confused:
Click to expand...

Hookers are cheaper?
 
you should just start acting like you dont care about her and you dont have time for her.
girls like challenges just like you dudes do.
and most girls like to be treated like crap.
from the sound of it, you seem too nice, start coming up with more things to do and keep yourself busy, a few days she will be good to go.
 
artrius said:
I think its probably the first thing. She told me that even with her exes, she didn't have all that much sex (except for with the last one, where she felt the only way to make him happy and keep him was with sex). :whatever:
Click to expand...

Looks like your on the road to impeding doom. Good luck! :argue:
 
you've been together just a few months but she lives with you?

my guess is that she's feeling suffocated, things came together so fast and now reality is setting in. She still enjoys you, but is questioning herself and her situation.

I don't think she's cheating on you.
 
nycgirl said:
I would be up front and ask her. If she isn't experiencing any stress (mental, emotional or physical) or some other logical reason. Then she is either getting it from someone else or she isn't into you any more and is bored. When I started thinking about posts on EF during sex, I knew it was time to end the relationship.

That said, isn't this the chick that was confused about being with you or going back to her ex?
Click to expand...

WTF??? Posts on ef DURING sex?

I hope at least were my posts...
 
ok. you sound like a good bor. i like you. so im going to help...ill send you a life sized photo of my face. stick it on your head whenever you want to send your girl into a frienzy of foam lipped lust. you have to be careful though...if she looks at it too long, she might die really happy and leave a corpse like the smiling corpses from Batman

PM me your adress :)

thank me later :)
 
Lestat said:
you've been together just a few months but she lives with you?

my guess is that she's feeling suffocated, things came together so fast and now reality is setting in. She still enjoys you, but is questioning herself and her situation.

I don't think she's cheating on you.
Click to expand...

Well, its more convenient for both of us that she lives with me. She lived in NY, while I lived in VA, so it was starting to cost me a lot to drive up there on the weekends. So we both agreed that it would be a good idea for her to stay with me since she was taking this semester off.

I'm not disagreeing with you, though, about the whole suffocating part. That is a good possibility.
 
GoldenDelicious said:
ok. you sound like a good bor. i like you. so im going to help...ill send you a life sized photo of my face. stick it on your head whenever you want to send your girl into a frienzy of foam lipped lust. you have to be careful though...if she looks at it too long, she might die really happy and leave a corpse like the smiling corpses from Batman

PM me your adress :)

thank me later :)
Click to expand...

gee thanks. :rolleyes:
 
Raina said:
Medication can kill her drive (bc pills and antidepressants are notorious for doing that). Stress can too.
Click to expand...

well she's not on any meds... but there has been some stress. I think its done and over with now, though.
 
artrius said:
Well, we finally had sex last night, woohoo!!! :biggrin: ;) Let's see if I can keep this up.
Click to expand...
In any case, if it comes up in conversation, I'd still menation what I said earlier about sex in a relationship. It's too early for this kind of drama. If you can at least talk about it, find out what may be the cause, & deal with it together.
It's not just about you getting laid, it's about both of you being happy together.
 
hidngod said:
In any case, if it comes up in conversation, I'd still menation what I said earlier about sex in a relationship. It's too early for this kind of drama. If you can at least talk about it, find out what may be the cause, & deal with it together.
It's not just about you getting laid, it's about both of you being happy together.
Click to expand...

True. It may not seem like it, but I don't care about sex as much as I probably come off. It just makes me wonder if I'm good enough, you know? Or if there is something wrong with us. Don't get me wrong, sex is great. For some reason, though, once I joined the military, my sex drive went to shit.
 
artrius said:
Ok ok ok, heres the deal. My gf doesn't want to have sex very often any more. Hell, she doesn't even bug me for oral like she used to, which is very odd. She said it wasn't anything personal, but I'm not so sure. Even if its, not, its been going on for a few weeks now. I can go without sex fine, but it IS a good thing, and I happen to like it... so, any of you have any ideas of getting her in the mood in a regular basis? I know all the romantic stuff is good, but even that doesn't work very well.

For example, when she was asleep, I went out and got a rose in a small vase, some rose petals, and a big teddy bear (about 2.5 ft tall). I had it set up with the bear sitting in the middle of my round table with the rose vase in between the bear's legs and the rose petals surrounding the bear and vase, all around the table. She has a fetish for guys in the cami uniform (you know, the camoflauge stuff), so I went and bought a set for her. I put that on, woke her up, and had her close her eyes as I led her to the table. I then took the rose and gently grazed her skin with the rose, all over her body. After that, I had her open her eyes, and I presented the rose to her, and put it in the vase. She loved every second of it, and was extremely happy... but still, she wasn't in the mood for anything other than cuddleing.

Am I doing something wrong? Any ideas? I'm confused :xeye: :confused:
Click to expand...

i´ll put it simple bor. she´s getting it somewhere else, especially if after or when she´s ragging it she´s not horny.
 
artrius said:
Good point. Like I said, she isn't able to see anyone else right now, because she lives with me, and she can't drive. She's kindof stuck at my place until I take her out. For the last part... you may be right, I don't know.



She's over that for good now. She acts like it, at least. She knows now that he was using her.
Click to expand...

sorry bor but she´s probably fuckin someone at ur place or he´s pickin her up... there´s ways if she´s bored or unhappy w u. take it from someone who´s been dicked before
 
tommy2tone said:
sorry bor but she´s probably fuckin someone at ur place or he´s pickin her up... there´s ways if she´s bored or unhappy w u. take it from someone who´s been dicked before
Click to expand...

Not possible. Well, if it *IS* possible, it is EXTREMELY unlikely for several reasons. 1) She just moved here (to VA) from NY. She doesn't have a job yet, and doesn't know anyone here. 2) I work about 4 hours a day right now, and she sleeps while I'm at work. She also has no transportation, either.

Not saying it isn't possible... but I think you can see about how unlikely it is.
 
artrius said:
Not possible. Well, if it *IS* possible, it is EXTREMELY unlikely for several reasons. 1) She just moved here (to VA) from NY. She doesn't have a job yet, and doesn't know anyone here. 2) I work about 4 hours a day right now, and she sleeps while I'm at work. She also has no transportation, either.

Not saying it isn't possible... but I think you can see about how unlikely it is.
Click to expand...

if she ain´t banging u atleast 3 times a month she doesn´t like u
 
tommy2tone said:
if she ain´t banging u atleast 3 times a month she doesn´t like u
Click to expand...


that is the hars truth of the matter...kick this chopstick chic to the curb. since you believe her not to be cheating, it is obivious she is not into you.
really, how can you have a gf or wife that doesn't want to tag you????
in my previous post here, of which I'm still gloating of my foreshadowing capabillity, you said that you weren't going to put up with much more of this...that was a couple months ago, looks like you are still putting up with this lol sucka
 
Gambino said:
that is the hars truth of the matter...kick this chopstick chic to the curb. since you believe her not to be cheating, it is obivious she is not into you.
really, how can you have a gf or wife that doesn't want to tag you????
in my previous post here, of which I'm still gloating of my foreshadowing capabillity, you said that you weren't going to put up with much more of this...that was a couple months ago, looks like you are still putting up with this lol sucka
Click to expand...

oi. boy that sure makes me think, believe it or not.

Yeah, I am a sucker. :worried:
 
artrius said:
oi. boy that sure makes me think, believe it or not.

Yeah, I am a sucker. :worried:
Click to expand...

dude fuck her in the ass.... make her suck ur dick before u blow... and tomorrow throw all her shit on ur front porch with a for free sign on it and tell her to get the fuck out
 
artrius said:
oi. boy that sure makes me think, believe it or not.

Yeah, I am a sucker. :worried:
Click to expand...


i can only speak so confidently because I've got the life experience to back it...don't be a pussy like me, you can still salvage your manhood
 
I know it's not what you want to hear man, but it sounds to me like something is up. If she is not cheating on you then maybe she has lost intrest, or feels like she needs some space. Being this early into the relationship, you guys should not be able to keep your hands off each other. Maybe she finds it hard to be 100% honest with you because of the living situation you guys are in ? like you said, she does really know anyone else. Hopefully it all works out for the best

M18
 
tommy2tone said:
dude fuck her in the ass.... make her suck ur dick before u blow... and tomorrow throw all her shit on ur front porch with a for free sign on it and tell her to get the fuck out
Click to expand...

lol
 
MUSTANG_18 said:
I know it's not what you want to hear man, but it sounds to me like something is up. If she is not cheating on you then maybe she has lost intrest, or feels like she needs some space. Being this early into the relationship, you guys should not be able to keep your hands off each other. Maybe she finds it hard to be 100% honest with you because of the living situation you guys are in ? like you said, she does really know anyone else. Hopefully it all works out for the best

M18
Click to expand...

It could be that she's lost some interest. To be honest, we happen to fight a lot these days, over stupid things (that and me poking fun at her sometimes). We've virtually been living together for three months. (sorta kinda not really though.) We've seen A LOT of each other, every waking moment for a while now. That could be part of it.

Like they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? Could that be it?
 
artrius said:
It could be that she's lost some interest. To be honest, we happen to fight a lot these days, over stupid things (that and me poking fun at her sometimes). We've virtually been living together for three months. (sorta kinda not really though.) We've seen A LOT of each other, every waking moment for a while now. That could be part of it.

Like they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? Could that be it?
Click to expand...

I think that is very possable. I know I was in a relationship for 2 + years and gradually we started to see each other every day, to the point where I pretty much lived there for a year (she didn't drive) It just became to much for me to handle, we faught all the time, I had no social life outside of her and I felt totally trapped. I ended up breaking it off and now I'm single and happy again. We are very close to this day but what happend was for the best. Maybe she just needs to get out with some of her friends and socialize outside of you to appriciate more of what she is coming home to. It is VERY easy to take someone/something for granted if you are always around it.

M18
 
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