Need some damage control help.

[Dakotah]

Ok I have given up totally and become lazier. It has come down to where my man has started commenting on certain things. I have stopped following my diet in the last two weeks and i have dropped significantly my workouts. I am at a point where I am unsure what I want and feel like i have been so happy that i didnt care what my weight was. Ihonestly dont think that i am overweight or fat- I do know that I have put on 35 pounds since a year ago but my situation a year ago was 10 times worse; I was in an environment where I didnt have money for food so I didnt eat also I was too depressed to eat and I was using drugs; and my source of excercise was through my job which was dancing for up to 10 hours a nite. Then when I moved in with Devastation things has started changing and He helped me feel better about myself and makes some much needed and strong changes. I felt wonderful and comfortable and he helped me stop dancing also.

When I come to EF i feel that I can spill whats on my mind. I want to change things but just dont have the drive to keep at it.
honestly one year ago i weighed between 125 and 130 and now i weigh 170 - but i never worked out with weights before and my butt and legs have more shape and the muscles are firm and my butt is hard but my stomach and waist is thicker and I fit few pairs of jeans.
I feel happy and comfortable until certain moments. Anyone have some ideas or advice on how I can exercise my mind also?

 

[the-short-one]

The toughest thing is to get your mind in gear - it's way harder than anything physical you might come up against.

But here's the thing - you need to be certain of what you want,and you need to do ONLY what makes you happy.




What do you want?

 

[Dakotah]

I want to fit in my clothes and I want to get serious about getting fit


sorry i know i have alot of threads saying pretty much the same things but its just one of those emotional days

sorry to sound repetative

 

[the-short-one]

I want to fit in my clothes and I want to get serious about getting fit


sorry i know i have alot of threads saying pretty much the same things but its just one of those emotional days

sorry to sound repetative

It's OK. I've had a few of those days myself.

Do you want to fit into your old clothes? You mentioned that you'd been into drugs and that accounted for your low body weight. I had a similar problem about 10 15 + years ago. I was out of high school, on my own, and got into drugs. Lost a ton of weight. When I finally got out of my bad situation, I fought constantly for the next 7-8 years with my weight and self image. I didn't want the durgs, but I wanted that body back.

I finally realized that whie I was thin, I wasn't healthy. AND - I realized I could look good in a bigger size because of muscle.

I don't know how to help you with your mental focus. I can only tell you that one day it just clicked for me in my mind because I knew what I wanted.

 

[Gymgurl]

We have all been there D!! Make some goals for yourself....hire a trainer once a week...try something new..join a weight loss group...(but I think you look great in your avi) make yourslef go to the gym until you want to go....try a new class...get a new workout outfit.........

 

[*MissFit*]

I have been u too sweety.. 2003 is a big blur.. and when i stopped my little outings.. i did gain back the weight i had lost.. and it came back.. not int he way i had had it before..

I will never be the thin tihng i was when i did recreational drugs.. but i think i look better now than i did then.

The mind part.. it was alot harder to overcome.. and too be completely honest.. I had to get my mind int he right frame, prior to doing the fitness portion of ym life rehaul.

 

[jenscats5]

Well, if you were doing drugs, then the size you were was only because of the drugs. You are so much more than that. Dress yourself for who you are now, not who you want to be. You may not be able to be that size again -- especially without the drugs, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Women can be beautiful & healthy in all shapes & sizes.

You need to allow yourself to be OK with who you are now.....then if you decide you want to change, change for yourself & not Dev or us on here or anyone else. If Dev is the man I think he is, he will love you no matter what.

Take some time & figure yourself out and once you become happy with who you are, then you can work on the physical part. Take it slow.....

 

[Dakotah]

Well, if you were doing drugs, then the size you were was only because of the drugs. You are so much more than that. Dress yourself for who you are now, not who you want to be. You may not be able to be that size again -- especially without the drugs, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Women can be beautiful & healthy in all shapes & sizes.

You need to allow yourself to be OK with who you are now.....then if you decide you want to change, change for yourself & not Dev or us on here or anyone else. If Dev is the man I think he is, he will love you no matter what.

Take some time & figure yourself out and once you become happy with who you are, then you can work on the physical part. Take it slow.....

Wow Jenscats thank you very much for the best advice i have ever recieved. I truly believe in what you say and that is exactly what I was thinking when I made this thread but like you said I feel compelled or pressured in a way to lose weight not because of anyone in particular - actually it is something I dont care to discuss but anyways what i am trying to say is thank you for your words they put things in a whole new perspective for me.
Hugs to you sweetie

 

[Pamela]

Dakotah
I find that walking helps me so much.
It gets me out of the house and smell the fresh air and it makes me feel better about myself.
Then when you start feeling better you can add some different exercise.

 

[Miss Kittie]

in away i feel like you feeling like this is my fault. You've been hearing me talk about getting back into my cute clothes after having the baby. I know how it feels to feel over weight and very unhappy but doll you have to do what makes you feel good if it is working out than do it.If it's for yourself and only your self. I want to get back in my clothes for me not for eddie and not for work for me. You know I've always thought you were SEXY and nothing is going to change that, just do what is in your heart. try to write in your fairy book i gave you make it your place of thought. i love you girl.