Something just does not seem right here. How do you have all the money to purchase all of these items? If you are 18 where the hell are your parents in this situation as obviously you can't be hiding this can you ? Again something to me does not seem right about this post , but if it is on the up and up, I would personally be getting some serious ass help from Doctor's that will sure as hell have more info on this situation than anyone here would. Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of very smart people here with a lot of knowledge and experience and that's why I came here, but your situation if true , warrants way the F**K more attention than anyone on the internet could ever be trusted to provide !!!! You sir made a HUGE MISTAKE and plunged into something serious without understanding what you were doing and are still continuing to do so . STOP IT !!!Go to the doctor immediately this is not an appointment situation this is an EMERGENCY !!!