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My boyfriend is an ASSHOLE!!!

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NubianBeauty

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Girls, I called him @ 3:30 pm(EST) on Wed. Oct 10, to ask him to pick me up from school @ 10:30...had to leave him a message on the C-phone because he did not answer.... I left home @ 5:45, he had not called yet:( :( So, I called him back in between my classes @ 7:45, I started not to call back because I just knew he would be there.....BUT guess what he told me!! "I'm not going to be able to pick you up because I am going to HOOTERS with the guys that I work out with":( WHAT IN THE HELL!!! IS WRONG WITH HIM!!:mad: :mad: :mad: I was speechless, ALL I managed to say was a very attitudenal "ALRIGHT" He called me back about 8:30 and asked why was I mad? I let him have it!!:D I then told him I had to go because I needed to call around and get someone to pick me up. He called back again about 9 and said he would pick me up, by that time I was stark raving mad!:mad: and did NOT want to even look @ him, so I told him "NO" so, he did not show up, or call me the next day which was Thurs or today, Fri before 3pm so guess what??? I changed the Home number and the C-phone... Now he CAN"T call!!:D :doublefi: him!
 
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if he already had plans before he had your message, too bad. Is he your pet? Even if you are dating, he should have a life apart from you. You are going to school, and unless you already have plans that he picks you up, you have no reason to be pissed at him.

Boyfriends do not have to be on call for whatever whim you have.
 
if he already had plans before he had your message, too bad. Is he your pet? Even if you are dating, he should have a life apart from you. You are going to school, and unless you already have plans that he picks you up, you have no reason to be pissed at him.
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 First of all, He SHOULD have been there for me REGARDLESS of WHAT he had previously planned!!! :mad: :mad: :mad: I have ALWAYS been there for him, I do not care about him going to Hooters, he could have gone there, come pick me up, then drop me off and in less than an hour back @ Hooters... Second of all, YOU DO NOT KNOW THE HISTORY OF OUR RELATIONSHIP!!!:mad: :mad: I have EVERY right to be PISSED, and HE knows that!!! I was glad he had a life outside of our relationship because that means that I DO NOT have to deal with the pressure of being his only outlet. So karde, DO NOT tell me "too bad" I did not ask for YOUR input... The thread started off with "Girls", do you fall into that category? I do not think so!!!!
 
Sorry, but you are an idiot. You will keep having shitty relationships until you learn something from this.

Especially since you say "He SHOULD have been there for me REGARDLESS of WHAT he had previously planned" This obviously wasn't an emergency, it was only school and you found a way home. You sound like you try to be very controlling. That will wear on any man.
 
she had no right to take her situation out on him.
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 WHO IN THE HELL ARE YOU!! to say what I have a right to do and NOT to do!! :mad: You do not know me!! I had EVERY right to be angry, HE knows it and will come crawling back, I was VERY good to him and for him, I have HELPED him out many, many, many times without EVER asking him for anything!!:mad: We have been dating for a little over 2 yrs now and I have dealt with ALOT!! HE NEEDS to make me a PRIORITY!! BOTTOM LINE!! I do not ask alot of him, as a matter of fact, I have never asked him to do ANYTHING for me until just recently when my car broke down.... I would ask other people for a ride from school and not him, he should have been the one I called but I chose not to(he has only picked me up twice, and I go to school 4 nights per week!!, I have only asked once the other time he asked me).. but the second time I do, he tells me NO!! That is NOT acceptable especially since I have been there for him each and every time he has asked and when he didn't!!
 
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Wow the problems run so deep with what you have said, I don't even know where to begin. I wouldn't be surprised if you were codependent.

I am being serious, and not trying to insult you. Have you ever read up on codependency?
 
You sound like you try to be very controlling. That will wear on any man.
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 There you go again!! Jumping to FUCKING conclusions!! :doublefi: I am not nor have I ever been controlling!! HE is DEFINITELY not a man a woman can control!! I would not want to be in a relationship with a WEAK man anyway!! And it seems to me as if you are the idiot!!
 
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Nube..... you dont need to explain anymore of the situation on here.....most of the girls on here, I am sure, understand and know where you are coming from !!

I think someone in particular is just f@#$ing with you anyhow....dont stoop to their level.

Be cool girl...... no man is worth the stress.....it causes pimples ;)
 
I am being serious, and not trying to insult you. Have you ever read up on codependency?
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 First you call me an idiot, now codependent ALL of this while trying NOT to insult me!! You are hilarious!! :bawling:

reprint.....
The following are some common characteristics of the codependent person.
1. We have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility and it is easier for us to be concerned with others rather than ourselves. This in turn enabled us not to look too closely at our faults.
2. We "stuff" our feelings from our traumatic childhoods and have lost the ability to feel or express our feelings because it hurts too much.
3. We are isolated from and afraid of people and authority figures.
4. We have become approval seekers and have lost our identity in the process.
5. We are frightened by angry people and any personal criticism.
6. We live from the viewpoint of victims and are attacked by that weakness in our love and friendship relationships.
7. We judge ourselves harshly and have a low sense of self esteem.

NOT!!!!!
 
The following are some common characteristics of the codependent person.

1. We have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility and it is easier for us to be concerned with others rather than ourselves. This in turn enabled us not to look too closely at our faults.

"I have HELPED him out many, many, many times without EVER asking him for anything!!"
"I have been there for him each and every time he has asked and when he didn't!!"


4. We have become approval seekers and have lost our identity in the process.
Posting this whole thing on a board to try and get people to agree with you.

5. We are frightened by angry people and any personal criticism.
I don't think i need to go over this one by the amount of caps, and fingers you have posted in this thread to some minor criticism on my part.

6. We live from the viewpoint of victims and are attacked by that weakness in our love and friendship relationships.
This entire thread is about how much of a victim you are.

Thats quite a few criteria you fill there. I am sure if you looked more you could fill every single criteria you listed. Sorry.
 
HOW old are you? And HOW long have you two been dating???:spit:Sounds like crap to me, whatta prick! I think you went overboard on the changing your #'s part though.
 
I fail to see how a someone, anyone, wanting to be a priority to their significant other would make them codependent. I mean in a relationship you have put that person above all others. That is why you are in the relationship. They are someone that you can depend on. If you need something they are there...and vice verse.
 
WOW...karde..think you said enough??? We are here to support not bash each other. Nubian I can see where you are coming from, but dont sweat it. Asking someone to help you out, especially your boyfriend should NOT be a big deal and he should be more than willing to help ya out. I can see if he was working or not in town...but he could have taken an hour out of his guys night out to get you and drop ya off...not a big deal. You are supposed to do for each other and so on...but thats why most relationships suck...its a one way street. Dont get all in a frenzy over it...not worth the stress.

Ive found whenever I have gotten all worked up and pissed..it did no good at all..wasted my time and energy and changed nothing of the situation. And you cant make someone understand or see things etc. You just do your thing and let him be...it has nothing to do w/ being codependent...I would hope if I was dating someone and I asked a favor they would help me out. I know I have a few friends who would do anything for me. Keep your head up girl and rant on here. Dont let him see you so upset...and dont overreact. You should be a lil upset but dont let it consume you etc.

Go to bed....hit the gym and find a sexy muscular man to take your mind off things... PLENTY of fish in the sea!! You dont need to be tied down to 1 man anyways....so much to choose from....
 
karde said:
Sorry, but you are an idiot.
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That was funny.

Anywho, why don't you, instead of changing numbers and all that, go to his house (I assume he has a house) and tear his testicles off with your hands, sprinkle some corrosive powders (email for more info) in the scrotum, and shove it down his throat??!!

Simple and effective; cheap as well.

Can' t beat that with a bat.
 
Supporting idiocy does not help people.

And sorry if it sounds like I am bashing, but this kind of behavior only perpetuates problems. If she has really been dealing with a shitty guy for 2 years, then yes she has problems of her own. It's annoying to hear people present themselves as total victims when almost always the problem is pretty equal between the 2 parties.
 
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Oh ladies..... I am old enough to be most of yall's mother and have been married for forever so here is the bottom line as far as relationships go.

PEOPLE ARE WHAT THEY ARE.
ONCE THEY SHOW YOU WHAT THEY ARE YOU HAVE TO DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT YOU CAN LIVE WITH IT.
PEOPLE DO NOT CHANGE VERY MUCH EVEN IF THEY PROMISE THAT THEY WILL.

So.....what you have to decide is can you live with him going out with his friends instead of giving you a ride? If so, then don't be pissed about it and if not, realize that he ain't going to change and move on.
 
NB>>>>>>>>>>Girl, how you doing today? Just got on, seems like you had a rough night on here explaining youself. Here's a kiss for ya :kiss:

OK, here goes, my take on this is pretty simple. I have been to school full time while my BF worked or whatever. And we shared a car (not that it matters) and I had school late or whatever. Now because I was at school so much, he got to use the car for whatever reason as long as he made sure to pick me up and drop me off.

Now for Nubian here, i agree with her that it should be his PIRORITY to pick her up from school, not to go to Hooters. Some of you say he already had made plans or whatever, WELL he shouldn't have made thos plans b/c im sure he knew about her. It wasa bad call on his part. Now if something important came up and he couldnt make it, then I would understand. But not Hooters. And its not the fact that it is Hooters, im sure she doesnt care if he goes there after or whatever.

It's that SHE should be his number one prirority in certain situations. It's not that hard to pick her up and drop her off and then go about his business.

And to make matters worst, which I think made NB fly off the handle, he didnt evern fucking realise this and wasnt sensitive to her needs or feelings.

If I couldnt get a hold of my man and then he calls from Hooters with the guys and tells me he can't pick me up....WATCH OUT BROTTHA!!!!!

It's mutual respect that counts in relationships. You give a lil and take a lil. Compromise is what people have a hard time with. He just said he couldn't pick her up, didnt offer any sort of compromise. Relationships are damn difficult, because it's NOT ALL ABOUT YOU, its about US and sometiems people are a bit selfish.

So anyways...how you doing girl? I got your back anytime :)
 
NB - hopefully you're feeling better today... I'm sure when emotions calm down you'll make whatever decision is right for you for the right reasons... try not to stress over it too much... vent out in the gym :) and take care of yourself...


Goatslayer: elloquently put...

i still love you... lets get married... no, even better, lets just particpate in ritual sacrificing of crossing guards...
 
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Phemomena said:

Goatslayer: elloquently put...

i still love you... lets get married... no, even better, lets just particpate in ritual sacrificing of crossing guards...
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You are soooo bad girl !!!!!! Good one ;)
 
Damnnnn... what a good for nuthin @@*&^!*^*@#!%#@^%* (those are a lot of bad words;) ) i try! HOOTERS!?! --->>>:sick:
haha...someones dumbass just got dumped!! :toilet: bye baby!
 
KBgrl said:
Damnnnn... what a good for nuthin @@*&^!*^*@#!%#@^%* (those are a lot of bad words;) ) i try! HOOTERS!?! --->>>:sick:
haha...someones dumbass just got dumped!! :toilet: bye baby!
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**Note to self**

NEVER make any of the women on this thread mad at me.

Hell hath no fury....:(
 
Phemomena said:
hehe for some reason i have a soft spot for GS (
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Yes. At one point in time for all the women who have known me, there inevitably comes the realization that they need a little Goatslayer in their lives. Perfectly normal. And I'm hoping that by "soft spot" you perhaps meant your skull. Yes no?
 
Satanic Goatslayer said:


Yes. At one point in time for all the women who have known me, there inevitably comes the realization that they need a little Goatslayer in their lives. Perfectly normal. And I'm hoping that by "soft spot" you perhaps meant your skull. Yes no?
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LMAO

oh, but of course!

alas, sadly our future is doomed, i have two kittens that i adore with all my heart and watching you mutilate and partake in their little helpless kitten innards would probably ruin it for me...

NB- where are you at? (maybe they made up and she'll be unavailable for a few days ??? or maybe she de-scrotomed him as earlier suggested and she's in jail.. hopefully whichever one it is, it was enjoyable?)
 
When I started this post I just wanted to rant a little… you know let off some steam,… couldn’t get to the Gym to do it, so I decided to do it here. I did not anticipate being insulted, especially by a man. You can not remotely comprehend what I am feeling in view of the fact that men and women react differently, think differently, are different. This occurrence was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. The fact that he did not call to apologize for not being there for me as usual, or try to explain his stance, which was something we just discussed recently, exacerbated the situation. Now I can not and do not insist on everyone agreeing with me…. Maybe someone saying that I overreacted or something to that effect. Not being called an idiot, controlling, or codependent. I do not need to be psychoanalyzed, especially by someone who can not identify with me (a Man) and who is not an educated professional on the subject matter. I am not a victim and did not intend to depict myself in that manner nor do I think that I have. Your observations are erroneous to me but accurate to you and you are permitted to have them, however, do not make assumptions and statements that could possibly cause offense to someone who is obviously hurting because of the actions of someone that she loves. The bottom line is my relationship is over. I now recognize that, and shall make the necessary steps to move on.

Another rant because I can't get to the Gym until later :)
 
As KB has said in the past : Make Those Weights Your BITCHES.......take out all that anger in the gym, and turn it into a positive experience for your body :)

Looking good and feeling good is a good revenge, and an awesome feeling :)
 
ann said:
As KB has said in the past : Make Those Weights Your BITCHES.......take out all that anger in the gym, and turn it into a positive experience for your body :)

Looking good and feeling good is a good revenge, and an awesome feeling :)
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Thanks girl!!:D
 
Keep your head up girl..and do not listen to insults from anyone from this board...we are on the outside looking in...we have no idea what is going on and details of your relationship...so what karde said was nothing....You do what you need to do and what is best for YOU. Only you know that.....All I can tell you is it WILL get better, and there is always something better out there, dont sell yourself short......Ive found if it gives me too much stress and its not doing much for me..i get RID of it..its not worth it. Go bang some weights!

:D
 
Shouldn't you have said, "My ex-boyfriend is an asshole?" Sorry about the male criticisms after you endured. Criticising someone in pain is very rude. Things will get better...they always do!;)
 
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