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Most embarassing gym moment...?

P

Phil King

New member
A little healing humor...

I was working out at a twenty-four hour gym, at two in the morning due to job constraints. The only person there was this cute little red headed nursing student who works the desk. I'm in week three of my first Sust/ Eq cycle, so I'm just starting to feel invincible, and horny as hell. Now I've got your attention, right.

So, I'm warming up for my heavy bench day and my joints feels great, the bars just flying up, and its one of those days, or nights, when you really don't even know how much you can lift. You just know it's more than you've ever done. Well, as I'm working my way up I notice the nursing student staring at me, "You need a spot" she says. "No, it's alright", I say, and bang out a set with a little extra snap at the top, so the plates make that sweet music.

Then I watch her walk from behind the desk to get a drink of water, and she's wearing a pair of those running shorts with the slits yo the sides, kind of like those old Dolphin shorts for the other old timers. Immediately, I realize I'm going for a max an I'm sure as hell going to need a spot!

On go more plates and change. "Don't worry," I say, as she squats down over me, looking nervous, "I feel strong tonight."

Enjoying the spectacular view the whole way, I lower the bar, pause it on my chest (bouncing is for the club kids) and blast it up. The thing is, I'm feeling so go, and the view is so great, did I mention the view, that I decide to go for a couple more reps. Half-way down on the second rep, feel my pec tear. WHAM! The bar lands on my strenum, kocking the wind out of me, and I'm pinned, totally helpless. The nursing student, who can't even budge the bar, is yelling for help, but there's no one else there!

To add insult to injury, I've got collars on the bar, so I can't just tell her to back off and dump the whole thing off. She shrieks, "I'm going to call 911!" Shit, I'm thinking, I'd rather die than have a firetruck pull up with sirens balsting and have a bunch of firemen stand around laughing at my pathetic ass! As calmly as possible, I gasp, "No...don't...just take off the collars. She understands what I'm saying, as soon as she gets them off, I dump the bar. BANG!!!

I sit up, sweating, and feel my pec, just praying the thing hasn't rolled up like a window blind, but damn, it feels fine! Just a strain. "Are you, okay?", says the little red head. "Uh," I'm just dying for something witty to say, but before I can, the Mexican family who cleans the bottom floor, busts in all wide eyed. When the red hed explains what happens, they just give me a crazy gringo stare.

I cut my workout short that night.

Thirty-seconds later, the
 
son of a bitch, you got me pumped when you said you were horny as hell, there was a hot red head, and no one else was in the gym. piss poor story, i was hopin you nailed her on the weight bench. :o
 
speaking of doing girls on weight benches- here's my story. my girlfriend has a little home gym in her house and it was kind of late at night and i was working out there while she was walking on the treadmill. So i'm on the bench press doing a few sets and she comes over and starts talking to me in the middle of a set. she asks "what muscles does this all help besides your pecs?" i say, "basically it works 3 muscles, chest, shoulders, and triceps." she stands there for about 45 seconds while i'm doing another set and doesnt say anything then all of a sudden she throws one leg over the bench and straddles me. then says, "want to work a fourth?" The only problem was i didnt have a condom on me! talk about a fuckin nightmare.b :horny:
 
OK, I'm just finishing a cycle, doing the HCG, Proviron & clomid!! Doing pulldowns and this little hottie asks to work in. Well, how can i turn down a smooth talker like that!! So, I'm watching her to some pulls behind the back, she's arching her back pushing her perfect chest out, and it's bustin out the sides of her little tight top, no bra, just tits and Nips!! as anyone whohas ever watched a girl do behind the back pulls knows what I'm sayin. So she finishes her set and says. " You're up." well, i move to stand and have to sit back down cuz I realize I'm sporting a major Chub!! She's lookin at me kinda wierd as I sit back down kinda turning sideways... "uh, you go ahead, I needa few more minutes to..uh... well, pshyc up" She figured it out, and i dont know who was more embarassed!!!
 
This is going to be a funny thread with a lot of hilarious experiences.

My worst experience was one night, when I was going to work biceps. I go to the squat rack to get ready to do some barbell curls to start out with. I had to adjust the bars on the sides to get the right heigth, so I could rest the barbell on it after each set. So, I set the barbell upright, one end on the floor, and the other end leaninig against the rack, for some stupid reason, as I figure it would be ok for just a minute. Then, it rolled right off, and crashed in to the mirror and totally destroyed it. Pieces went everywhere. It was so fucking loud you could have heard it from the next zip code. Everybody on the treadmills, lifting weights, etc., stops and stares, some were laughing. Fortunately, there weren't a hell of a lot of people that evening, as it was a Friday. I ended up paying for half of that mirror. :rolleyes:
 
:FRlol: :FRlol.

I've lost my short while Squatting! :(
but worst last months, im doing some cycling, there a stair next to the cardio
so I saw a guy watching between my legs and laughing, im like WTF
then a girl passed look at me and a big grin! Im like hmmm cool.
then a guy pass and shook his head while he look at me, then another girl pass
and smile from ear to ear while she look at between my legs
So I sled my hands up to the middle of my legs, then I felt something WRONG
ONE OF MY FUCKING BALL WAS STICKING OUT OF MY SHORT!!!
: :mad:
 
ewwwwwww 3vandoo. that's sick, we said humor not perversion.:mix:

One time at my gym some 15-16 year old was on the decline ab bench and his shorts fell down and his package was exposed to about 5 people, that was pretty funny. i kinda felt sorry for the kid, 3 girls about his age busted up laughing at him.
 
I was doing back one day, and the gym was packed with hot chicks. I was pretty psyched because I can move some decent weights when it comes to pulling stuff. After working up to 365 on barbell rows I swaggered over to the cable row machine and told some scrawny dude who was using about a quarter of the stack to get out of my way. I then pulled the pin out and with a loud thunk jammed it into the bottom of the stack. The whole stack weighs 340 or something, and I am only about 195, so to get the heavier weights in position I have to balance on top of the foot stirrup thingies and then use my legs to violently throw myself back and down into the seated position. After much pacing and growling I jumped up on the machine, grabbed the handle and with a loud scream and threw myself back.

(It should now be noted that after the 240lb plate, the weight stack changes to 20lb plates, which are thicker at the base and require a long pin. The scrawny dude was not using the long pin.)

So with the loud scream I straighted my legs with plenty of force to throw the 340lbs + my own 195 into position. As we know though, a short pin in the bottom of the stack engages exactly zero lbs. When a 195lb individual suddenly exerts 535+ pounds of force, they become....airborn. In my case the trajectory was at a 45 degree angle, permitting a beautifully arched flight path that ended 7 feet behind the row bench when my head made impact with the gym floor.
 
Mine isnt anywhere near as funny as your guys' stories are but oh well.


Somehow I went to the gym wearing khaki shorts a white t-shirt and mickey mouse ankle socks today. I have no idea how.
 
SoCo4Fun said:
Mine isnt anywhere near as funny as your guys' stories are but oh well.


Somehow I went to the gym wearing khaki shorts a white t-shirt and mickey mouse ankle socks today. I have no idea how.
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:FRlol: :FRlol: :FRlol:
 
Somehow I went to the gym wearing khaki shorts a white t-shirt and mickey mouse ankle socks today.
Click to expand...


It feels soooooo good to laugh right now!

So you must truly have big huevos if you stayed for your whole workout! That's a true tuff guy! :FRlol:
 
I was on a business trip in another city and used a local gym when my flight arrived. Got to the gym around 11pm (closed at midnight) so I was hustling to finish in time, plus I wanted to get to the hotel and go over some of my notes. Anyways, the place was practically empty and it was exactly like my gym (same chain) EXCEPT the locker rooms were reversed. I must have been jet lagged or something because I went into the wrong locker room and took a quick shower. All my shit was in my luggage and this gym didn't have any towels, so I thought I would just air dry and put my old shorts back on and go to the rental car shirtless. Well I walk into the stall after my shower to take a piss---naked as a jaybird, and 2 women walked in the bathroom just as I was walking out. My gym clothes were still hanging by the shower and I was so stunned I just froze. One of them was about my age, so her eyes go straight down to Mr. Droopy, the other one was about 60 and she ran out of there and reported me as a pervert or something.

The young chick just giggled uncontrollably for the most part, and wouldn't leave as I scrambled to locate my clothes, while grandma was summoning the local police to arrest me for my perversion. My shorts were grey and I was still wet, so when I put them on (free balling of course) it left some nice big wet spots on my crotch and ass. A local cop got me in the parking lot and busted my balls for about 10 minutes while repeatedly looking at the wet spot in the front of my shorts. The young chick came over and told him I wasn't a pervert or a flasher, but just made a mistake, so he let me go. I might have asked her to go out with me, but I was so embarassed I just wanted to get the hell out of there.
 
okay here is my story

I just started to work out....and I was at this little piss gym at my girlfriends dorm, Well luckily we were the only one there....and after benching a couple of times, I took on all the weight there was, something like 233LB, wich was alot for me at the time, so I benched it a coulpe of times...then after that I went dead....and it landed on my throat...luckly nothing happened...but that has to be the most embarrassing things I've ever tried....://

- Someguy
 
alright here's a lil something. About three years ago in 98 I was just starting to workout not knowing really the right posture on the moves. So anyways i had a weight training class in highschool, well as I was about to squat a buddy of mine who was spotting me put on 230 and said that I should be able to squat it with no problem so i was like yeah it don't look like much so i will give it a try, and plus there were girls that were seniors that were so hot, so I tried it and as I got the bar on my shoulders I backed up a step and as I was going to squat me not keeping my chest out and my head up decided to put my head down, well a second later the shit rolled off of me straight and hit the lower bars, and the girl that I liked she started laughing because I was in total shock anyways after that we talked and now she is a vikings cheerleader and I am really "good" friends with her.
 
I'm doing chest one day and I'm on my last set of incline bench. I go to rack it and I missed on of the sides, half the bar with 225 on it comes crashing on my face I layed there for a minute with my face turned to the side from being smushed by the bar until some guy ran over to help. I wasn't as embarresed as I thought I 'd be until I looked in the mirror and realized I had an indent of the bar grip and all on my face which didn't go away for about a week.
 
I was doing shoulder presses on the back side of the preacher curl seat. Well when I go heavy while I am standing up I clean and jerk the dumbbells into position and then back up and sit on the seat. Well one day I was on a couple of pain pills and you guessed it I missed the seat. I went down to the ground pretty fast and dropped the dumbbells from about 2 ft and they of course made a loud noise. Everybody in the whole turned to see and laugh. And I could come back with was "whoops" and started laughing myself.
 
I fell asleep in a tanning bed once , then was awakened by the smell of smoke .The outlet that the bed was plugged into was burning.
Out of panic and disorented from sleep I jumped up and ran out of the room , to get a fire extinguisher , naked.
the lady behind the counter was the only person that saw me so it wasin't that bad .

that and farting when doing lying leg curls
 
Recently, one of the hot chicks at the gym asked me to spot her doing squats so I did. There was some other chick next to us doing squats too. All of a sudden the other chick left abruptly. Next thing I know, I'm smelling a pretty hard core gasser. I knew it was the chick next to us but I'm sure the chick that I was spotting thought it was me. I didn't know what to say so I just didn't say anything and just hoped it would go away but the hang time on that sucker was unbelievable.

I couldn't talk to her for a while. I felt like I was framed.
 
ok, Let me give ya some quick background for a source of 100's of good stories! 5 years ago I owned an all womens gym at the beach, Yes ALL WOMEN!! Made no money but what a great time!
Anyway, I bring this girl back from this bar to the gym. All chicks wanna get banged on the machines!! So We are 2 drunk fools and after giving her the grand tour!! HeHe He, we pass out on the floor. So In the AM (sat) I dont wake up so i can't open. well the 6 AM aerobic class is waiting outside. The instructor shows and she has a key, So she and the group come walking in and find me and this chick passed out on the floor on a pile of aerobic mats, gym towels and beer bottles all over!! Talkin about the mad scramble!! It wa a small club and i was frinedley w/ all members so all i got was alot of harrassment & laughs from them.
The girl though was hating it, never saw her again. One of the members came over and handed her the pair of CFM high heels she was wearing the night before! Talk about the walk of shame for her leaving!! That gym was alot of fun!!!
Every body should jhave as much fun at their gyms as all of us!!
 
ONCE I WAS DOING MY ALL TIME MAX LEG PRESSES(AT THAT TIME).I HAD 16 PLATES ON THE PRESS FOR MY LAST SET. BY THE TIME I FINISHED I COULD HARDLY STAND UP AND FELT PRETTY LIGHT HEADED.IN THIS STATE OF MIND I JUST WAS'NT THINKING.UNLOADING THE PRESS WAS A WORKOUT IN ITSELF AT THIS POINT.SO I TOOK ABOUT 6 PLATES OFF OF ONE SIDE AND WITH A VERY LOUD NOISE OF 45lb PLATES CRASHING , THE LEG PRESS TIPPED OVER ONTO THE HEAVY SIDE.EVERYONE LAUGHED AND I WAS EMBARRASED AS HELL.BUT AT LEAST I KNEW EVERYONE THERE. A COUPLE BROS HELPED ME SET THE LEG PRESS BACK UP.
 
I was doing shrugs with some fairly heavy dumbbells, i think they were 100's. Well my gym has dumbbells that go up to 150, and they don't fit on the rack. They just store them under the rack so that when you're grabbing dumbbells off the rack or putting them back on, you have to lean over the dumbbells on the floor. I was finished with my set, and i went back to put the dumbbells back on the rack. I couldn't get close enough to just drop them on the rack, so I just tried to swing them up there. Well, I guess my arms weren't long enough because I couldn't get them there, so they came swinging back. When they swung back, they came together and squashed the tip of my dick between them. I literally thought that the head of my dick had exploded. I screamed in pain, and the whole gym just went silent.

Funny thing is, I saw the same thing happen to this 250 lb. monter about two weeks ago.
 
I grabbed a pair of the hundred lb dbells and placed them on my thighs. When I went to lean back to start my reps I slid of the bench and on my ass. The dumbells slammed to the ground and rolled away and knocked over this hot chicks water bottle. Had to wipe up the floor and weights. Pretty funny shit.
 
Ok if you must know ...When I was laying in the tanning bed with a girlfriend when my kind of X girlfriend beats on the door mad and wanting in. Door was locked, so she said she was told this @$%^% girl was in there with me and if I didn't open she was coming over the wall. Well she made it over the wall and lets just say we didnt have enought time to get dressed. I ended up with a black eye and the door opened with my self half way dressed in front of everyone. Damn it was funny now that I think about it. Yenko
 
I was at the gym one day and was having a really good workout. I was feeling really good about myself - everything was cool. I walked up to the water fountain got a big mouth full of water to cool down. As I turned around, somehow the water I was trying to swallow went down my windpipe. I tried to cough and hold my mouth shut at the same time but I ended up spitting/spraying a mouthful of water on the biggest fuckin' mutant in the gym who was behind me at the water fountain. Boy was I embarrassed when everybody started laughing and the mutant got really pissed. Well I am still alive - so I guess he must not have been on a heavy test cycle.
 
This fine chick was wearing gray spandex shorts one time at my gym. She has a tight body and knows what she's doing, she gets through her workout with no bs. Well when she was doing tricep kickbacks I was on a bench right behind her doing concentration curls and I noticed a hole in her shorts about the size of a quarter right in her crotch. She was wearing nice pink undies. I didn't want to be the one to tell her, so I got the attention of this other good-looking girl there whom I had wanted to meet anyway. I asked her if she could mention the hole to the other girl when she went into the locker room.

Anyway, they both disappeared into the locker room and then the one with the hole emerged, red-faced, straight for the parking lot.

Best part is I got to know the other girl and now she thinks I am a sweetheart for not wanting to embarrass the girl with the pink panties.
 
3Vandoo said:
[BSo I sled my hands up to the middle of my legs, then I felt something WRONG
ONE OF MY FUCKING BALL WAS STICKING OUT OF MY SHORT!!!
: :mad: [/B]
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Oh shit I just read this......Dude, I hope you're not one of those fuckers who wears short cut-off Daisy Dukes to work out in, or Richard Simmons shorts, because that is really gay, even to gay people.
 
PimpnAintEasy said:
Oh shit I just read this......Dude, I hope you're not one of those fuckers who wears short cut-off Daisy Dukes to work out in, or Richard Simmons shorts, because that is really gay, even to gay people.
Click to expand...

LMFAO!!!
 
Here's Mine...

One time, I was just getting over the flu and I decided to hit the gym for the first time in a week or so. I headed straight for the power rack to hit some squats. In the middle of one of my sets, I kinda feel like I have to fart or something. I also notice this kinda shitty diaper smell.
I go off and hit some curls or whatever I was doing that day, and about 10 minutes later, one of the bros I sometimes work out with told me to turn around and look in the mirror. I look, and there's this brown shit spot on my buttcrack seeping through my pants!! In the reflection of the mirror, I can see a bunch of dudes fucking laughing at me. Sure enough, I got the hell outta there.
The worst part about it was not having to go back and see everyone, but the fact that while I was driving home, some of the shit seeped through my sweatpants and onto my carseat!! Now there's a permanent shit-stain on my carseat!! (I just tell people it's coffee hehe)
 
When I was 18 and a freshman in college, I joined the local meathead gym. Keep in mind, I'm 6'2" and at that time about 165 lbs. I was warming up for bench press and started stretching. So I raised my arm over my head in a circular fashion. Well, this gym had kinda low ceilings and I busted a fluorescent light right above me. I was showered in glass! The mutant that was working the counter wasn't happy about having to clean up the glass. I quit that gym soon after.

That can't beat the guy shitting himself, but I still thought I'd share.

Sniff, sniff. You guys smell something?:D
 
After having a huge bench workout, I decided to do push-ups. So I am doing my push-ups and I decided to go until failure. While I was doing it, a whole bunch of people were watching me cause I was really going at it. I lost count but I decide to keep going and as I push myself to do one more, on my way up my arms give out on me and I do a face plant onto the floor at full speed and everybody says, "Ewwwwwwww," at the same time. I felt like a moron and my nose hurt and I thought I broke it. But what the hell, no pain no gain!!!!

Btw, NO MORE PUSH-UPS TILL FAILURE!
 
Re: Here's Mine...

MaxBiceps said:
One time, I was just getting over the flu and I decided to hit the gym for the first time in a week or so. I headed straight for the power rack to hit some squats. In the middle of one of my sets, I kinda feel like I have to fart or something. I also notice this kinda shitty diaper smell.
I go off and hit some curls or whatever I was doing that day, and about 10 minutes later, one of the bros I sometimes work out with told me to turn around and look in the mirror. I look, and there's this brown shit spot on my buttcrack seeping through my pants!! In the reflection of the mirror, I can see a bunch of dudes fucking laughing at me. Sure enough, I got the hell outta there.
The worst part about it was not having to go back and see everyone, but the fact that while I was driving home, some of the shit seeped through my sweatpants and onto my carseat!! Now there's a permanent shit-stain on my carseat!! (I just tell people it's coffee hehe)
Click to expand...

I am never going to ride in your car bro'. :FRlol:
 
Alright, I'm working at the local gym as a floor trainer. We've got those DB with the bolts on the sides and I'm doing DB incline with like 65lb DB's or so. It wasn't much weight for me at the time, barely a warm-up now, so my spotter wasn't paying much attention. Of course there's hot chics all over and they all know me cause I work there. I'm doing a burn-out set and I kinda died in the middle of a rep, but was stubborn enough to keep holding it and trying to push it out. My spotter turns around and is stunned that I'm turning purple and stuck, so he really quickly goes to push my elbows. My elbow just bends in and I thumped that thing right in the middle of my forehead, leaving a nice indent of the bolt and a good headache. Nobody laughed at the time cause I through a fit, but it seemed like every girl I worked with the next day had to giggle at me before asking if I was alright.
To make things worse, the next day I ripped my pants on squats while simultaneously having a shit fart. Needless to say, that was not pretty either. At least the huge bruise on my forehead drew some of the attention away from my ripped pants and stank ass.
 
Alright I got a story or two to share. I'll start with one about farting cause those bad ass are the best.

My old training partner and I are both well known for having a flatulence problem. In fact, there was a time when people who came into our apartment (we're roommates) would say, "It smells like shit in here." I always responded with a quick pantsing and a rabbit punch to the groin. Chicks aren't especially impressed with that maneuver but they always forget about the smell. Anyway, when at the gym, we'd very frequently have to expel nauxious chemicals through our anuses in between sets, so we'd always slither back into the back corner of the Nautilus equipment room which isn't heavily occupied normally and pollute the air without a second thought to the durability of the paint on the machines. Basically, he'd do a set and excuse himself, then I'd do a set and excuse myself. The plan was flawless really. Never got caught that way. However, one time during the climb up the stairs on the way to the weight room I couldn't wait and let fly in the stairwell. Just as the door to the weight room closed after we had passed through one of the female personal trainers who worked there at the time - who by the way was blonde with the tightest body you ever did see - came through behind us. She looked less than impressed and said, "You guys stink." Being the quick witted fuck that I am (humor me on that one), I turned to my training partner and shouted, "Fuck you loser. You do stink. Go home. No one appreciates that kind of shit round here." He got so red that I actually got a little scared. He didn't talk to me for a while but just kept mumbling on the way home, "You're dead, do you hear me?" Well, hoping to lighten the mood a little, I asked him if he knew that he had a weird sounding voice and always did and if anyone had ever told him that before. This guy is so vain it's disgusting and he didn't take that well either. "Shut the fuck right up," he said using a completely different voice than usual. "I do not. My voice sounds just fine. Leave me alone." He doesn't go to the gym with me anymore.
Moral of the story: Stick to the corners of rarely occupied, dimly lit rooms and everything in life will turn out just fine!
 
Maxbiceps..that was FUKKIN the funniest shit i have heard all day! I feel for ya..

I guess I will tell you all mine really quickly. In a nutshell I hit the gym a few weeks back. I didnt even feel like hitting the gym that day but I thought, "what the heck, just a quick one." Well i couldnt find my normal warmups to wear so I just grapped an old cheap pair. Twenty minutes into the workout, i see everyone kinda looking at me in a strange way. I thought they were a bunch of haters or something, so I continued. Then, I took a look in the mirror and I noticed that the cheap plastic -like nike warmups i had on were TORN UP from my back thigh to my ass!! lol I got soo fucking red-faced and pissed that I just went to the trainers station, grabbed some TAPE and just taped them together!!! and continued my workout! oh well my summer membership was almost up:)
 
Well here I was squatting about 395 lbs. Which is pretty heavy for me (im 16 and weigh about 165lbs and am 5'8"). Anyways, I am going for 8 reps, and I do two nice ones.

Then this hot red head that works the counter walks by to go and get a sip from the water fountain. Shes wearing these really short shorts and tight on the ass. So while she bends over for the water, I'm constantly starring at her lucious ass. Note that I am still with the bar half way into squatting. Then she gets up to leave, so I quickly go back into squatting but I lost my balance and dropped everything. BAM! Everything goes down. Everyone stops and looks at me. The only thing I said was "oh shit.. my bad". I couldnt speak. I was embarressed at the same time. Damn that was fucked up.
 
Funnt Story!

This was NOT FUNNY but FUNNY (because the guy did not get hurt) This happened at a small gym in W. Virginia. Well, there was a dude that was about 6'2" maybe 145 soaking wet with lead boots. My wife and I were doing squats and were about mid way through. I had 315 on the bar and he walked over and said "can I work in". (Please note that he was not even training legs or had even warmed up). Knowing this dude was a complete idiot, I said "sure dude help yourself" Well, this skinny, limber stick figure gets under the bar (Also, note that his neck was sooo long that you could land a friggin 737 on it). He backs up wobbling and his pair of pencils shaking. He starts (what appears to be be bending his legs - but actually was a Hyperextention with a 315 pound loaded bar. Well, needless to say WHHHHAMMM! His neck is pinned on the ground - it happened so fast that I was like "FUCK DUDE" This was an OLD STYLE squat rack with nothing to catch the bar. This man got up unhurt because his neck was so skinny there was room between the bar and the floor. The dude got up and his neck was purple and had permanent criss cross Knurl Marks from the bar. The whole gym busted out laughing (after he was OK of course). He slowly walked out with his head drooping (he he)..... pun intened of course!
 
I just watched a guy the other day doing dips with waaaaaaaay to much weight tied around his waist. His left hand slipped off the bar and he fell and smashed his head into it. He fell into a heap on the floor and I ran over there to help him. He was like "Yeah, I fell, so what?" and left. Next day he has a shiner on his face like you wouldnt believe.
 
bigguns7 said:
I literally thought that the head of my dick had exploded. I screamed in pain, and the whole gym just went silent.
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haha that has got to be one of the funniest things i have ever read :) :) :)
 
I was foolin around with an older woman after my divorce and she was flirty with me in the gym. Well she got all hot and bothered and started talking about masterbating if I wasn't going home with her, called it beating off. Then she tells me she want me to pound her in the ass again. I was all HOLY SHIT happy and then turn arounf and about ten others are looking at me. She was talking loud enough they could all hear her. I'm open minded as hell but getting tossed out on the stage like that blew my doors off. Embarrassed the shit out of me and fucked me up for the rest of the night. Done in that gym.
 
Re: Here's Mine...

MaxBiceps said:
One time, I was just getting over the flu and I decided to hit the gym for the first time in a week or so. I headed straight for the power rack to hit some squats. In the middle of one of my sets, I kinda feel like I have to fart or something. I also notice this kinda shitty diaper smell.
I go off and hit some curls or whatever I was doing that day, and about 10 minutes later, one of the bros I sometimes work out with told me to turn around and look in the mirror. I look, and there's this brown shit spot on my buttcrack seeping through my pants!! In the reflection of the mirror, I can see a bunch of dudes fucking laughing at me. Sure enough, I got the hell outta there.
The worst part about it was not having to go back and see everyone, but the fact that while I was driving home, some of the shit seeped through my sweatpants and onto my carseat!! Now there's a permanent shit-stain on my carseat!! (I just tell people it's coffee hehe)
Click to expand...

hahaha
 
Im laughing my ass off at this entire thread...Id tell my story but its not even close to being as fucked up as some of yours
 
Well......this story is more painful than funny, so it prolly shouldn't be here, but oh what the hell. This is why you should always clear out weights on the ground around you. I was doing dumbell flies (on my back), and I was going good w/ 2 40's. Then as I finished up my last couple reps, I tried to do one more......I got it halfway up, and was too burned out to finish, so I went to drop them on the ground. What I didn't notice was that there was a 65 on the ground RIGHT underneath, and my left index finger was completely crushed between the two. It all happened within a few seconds, and was over quickly, but I looked at my hand, and the nail was peeling off, and there was blood squirting from my finger. I tried to do some lat pulldowns afterwards, but each pull caused my finger to shoot out more blood, so I decided to quit for the day. My fingernail did end up falling off, and took a fuckload of time to grow back (it's been about 7 months now and it's just gotten back to normal). Knocked me outta my work out schedule for like 3-4 weeks. Needless to say, I now clear out ALL WEIGHTS when doing any kind of lifting.
 
this thread is funny as hell, but you guys that have problems with your sphincters, should really go see a doc. I know i dont wanna smell and farts or see a guy shit his pants when i go to the gym. and the guy with the ball hangin out of his shorts....the girls werent smiling at you THEY WERE LAUGHING AT YOU. what kind of shorts were you WEARING!!!!!!! lol you guys are a trip, and stop farting anywhere in my gym that is NASTYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYy
 
Ok, I don't know if I can compete with some of your sphincter stories, but I'll share anyway.

When I was a freshman in college I worked out in a hardcore, basement iron dungeon with some pretty big mofo's. Me, I was a massive 6ft 140lbs so mostly I just tried to stay out of the way. I did have a slammin' boom box at the time, so I think these mutants tolerated me becuase I brought some good tunes. Anyway, the gym had no windows and little did I know one light switch controlled the lights for the whole gym. I finished a set and decided to lean up against the wall to rest. As soon as I lean against the wall - poof - the whole gym goes completely dark. Picture these guys doing massive benches and squats, etc and the lights go out. The gym goes deathly quiet, and I didn't even realize I was the idiot who had turned out the lights. About 3-4 seconds go bye and some kind soul near me says, 'You turned out the lights fuckwad". I turned them back on, the whole gym is looking at me and I mumble, uh sorry.

I did finish my fucking workout - no way I was going to slink out of there. But I didn't say too much.
 
The forst time i attempted a 400 lb. squat, I let a REALLY wet fart go. I got the weight up, but that pair of underwear had to be flushed and that section of the gym was evacuated and fumigated!
 
I lift regularly at the gym the same time everyday so I usually see the same people day and day out - it's most convenient for my schedule. Well, anyways I had on an old pair of army fatigues - black ones that had seen better days. I was doing a good arm routine so I spent a lot of time in front of the mirror that day. Keep in mind that the whole gym, cardio machines and all faces this mirror - the cardio equipment is raised a floor so they get a really good view of the entire gym. As I was walking around during my workout I felt an unusally "breeze" but thought nothing of it. I was there for a good hour before I go to pick up a weight I dropped and just happened to look back at my ass in the mirror. I had a rip in my crotch that went all the way up to my belt straps - and I was going commando!!! Well, when I finally realized my ass was hanging out for everyone to see I packed up my bags and left. I was embarrased to all end. It pissed me off because I could tell some people were laughing at me - the same mother #%^&&* I see every day. They didn't have the common courtesy to tell me. The just stood there and laughed. Well, that was the last time I was friendly to them, now I'm a dick - now they gotta watch out for the asshole that can bench 375 - they don't come around me no more - weak and pathetic loosers.
 
Can't beleive I'm sharin this

I once rushed to the gym one day. After I was almost done with my workout I realized I had 2 different sneakers on. Both white, but different. Talk about feelin stupid.
 
During heavy legs days I used to wear compression shorts under my shorts. one day, while visiting my sister in DC, i was working out at her corporate gym, a bunch of suits crowded around the stairmasters and me, I really blended in well... I forgot the regular shorts and just had bike shorts on over the compression shorts which made things that much tighter than they should have been, had every plate i could find on the 45¢ª press, pushed it up, apparently my nads shifted place under the compression shorts and when i lowered the weight it felt like sombody latched onto my nad with a vise grip.

Of course I couldnt do shit, pinned in the chair by 700+lbs and unable to speak, couldnt do shit, face turning the color of a firetruck and my arms flailing around like Richard Simmons to "Its raining men"

Suits all hopping around trying to figure out what to do, trying to PUSH the rack back up... when a trainer calmly walked over and started slide/dumping the plates off.

The crazy part was once the pressure was off my legs, THATS when I just about blacked out.

All in all a very impressive session.
 
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