Living with Bi Polar and NOT taking meds

[HappyScrappy]

when people say that one can just deal with it and don't need the meds, it is usually someone that hasn't ever been through it.

it is like if I kick you in the shin and your tibia shatters and you fall to the ground in agony, grabbing at it and moaning in pain.
I then walk up to you and sort of shift my weight around, noticing I have zero pain in my legs at all - but I have had a leg cramp before.
so I pull you to your feet and tell you that you are a pussy and what you need is not any drugs or medical attention, but in fact you just need to "walk it off" - it worked for that nagging cramp, so therefore the pain you have, since I don't feel it, has to be equal, and therefore walking it off will work for you.

the point being, if you have never been through it and are currently normal, then it is very easy to assume that the person is just a pussy and needs to just deal with it - after all, you have done that haven't you? but if they aren't normal, it is not an easy thing and they will need some help. at the very least counseling and perhaps even meds.

that said, I do think there are many people out there that are self-diagnosing themselves instead of confronting perhaps larger issues in their life and the ease of getting the meds is easy enough...

 

[musclebrains]

Groan. My first client today was someone with a bipolar partner who won't take her meds.

The treatment of bipolar disorder is not very exact because the disorder -- one of the three major mood disorders -- is so variable itself. SOme people suffer intense mania, accompanied by anxiety and self-destructive thoughts, while others have so-called hypomania, which is relatively mild and can often initiate periods of high creativity and productivity. Because the latter is so seductive, med compliance is a huge problem with many bipolar types.

Sometimes you get mixed-state bipolar disorder in which the patient is at once manic and depressed or oscilllates wildy in a day. Those who cycle moods more typically do it once or twice a year while others do it weekly. Nearly ALL patients can have extended periods of normal moods inbetween the highs and lows and this, too, seduces people into not taking their meds.

It runs in families and is thought to be neurochemical in origin. The main function of therapy is to help people adapt to the disorder, not to cure it.

 

[decem]

while others have so-called hypomania, which is relatively mild and can often initiate periods of high creativity and productivity. Because the latter is so seductive, med compliance is a huge problem with many bipolar types.


this is PRECISELY why i don't take my meds.. when i was on depakote and celexa.. i had virtually no creativity or imagination at all...


It runs in families and is thought to be neurochemical in origin. The main function of therapy is to help people adapt to the disorder, not to cure it.

is there any link to bi-polarism and autism or epilepsy? as in both or all three commonly running in families? just wondering.

 

[musclebrains]

I'm not aware of any correlation between bipolar disorder and epilepsy and autism (and I did work extensively with autistic children some years ago).

I would be mistrustful of a long-term decision to forego meds in order to preserve a hypomanic state, since those too usually end up accompanied by anxiety and eventually tend to escalate to mania or crash to depression. And the subjective report of the patient in this regard it not very reliable. They often mistake mania for creativity when it's no such thing.

Celexa should improve, not diminish, productivity, though it does have a mildly sedative effect on many patients (in which case it should be taken nights). It is also prescribed for the treatment of obessive-compulsive disorder so, of course, it's not attractive to someone spellbound in a manic episode.

 

[HappyScrappy]

when I was in the hospital in '95 for depression there was a guy in there that was there for having bi-polar and not taking his meds.
he did everything really quickly and talked loudly.
I envied him - he had so much energy. and he was so much fun to watch eat.

 

[casavant]

HappyScrappy-

Great post man. You put it into words perfectly.

 

[musclebrains]

when I was in the hospital in '95 for depression there was a guy in there that was there for having bi-polar and not taking his meds.
he did everything really quickly and talked loudly.
I envied him - he had so much energy. and he was so much fun to watch eat.

The denial of bipolar types is astounding,r eally. My client's girlfriend went off her meds and began having strange neurological symptoms, which, she became convinced, were due to a brain tumor. She has insisted on two MRIs in the last two months -- anything to protect her mania -- and has finally agreed to go back on her meds.

 

[HappyScrappy]

I would love to be manic.

there were a whole series of fun people in the hospital - it made me feel so normal.

1) a woman that would wander around looking for her husband that recently died. every few hours she would see fire and "run" for her life screaming for us to save ourselves. she was old and couldn't run that fast. she was also paranoid and one of the other people there got in trouble for calling her over and telling her "they know, and they are coming for you" - she FREAKED.

2) there was a woman that would only talk to the piano. she would sit on the couch next to it and get into HEATED political debate over the Nixon and JFK years. You would only ever hear her side, so I was always curious if the piano could really put up a good arguement or not. other than that, she refused to talk to anyone else.

3) EVERYONE smoked. they were hurting b/c you weren't allowed to smoke until you had shown good behavior for awhile. one of the guys was convinced that he was not gonna smoke any more - he got out and went back to his house - an escape. he smelled how nasty it smelled from the smoke and came back. always thinking. he started smoking a week later.

4) my roommate for awhile was an old man that had sleep apnea. he was hooked to a monitor that would alert the staff because he would just stop breathing in his sleep sometimes or sort of wake up choking. he was very nice and really really quiet, hard to tell what he was saying. he was a recovering alcoholic and aside from myself, the only patient there that didn't smoke. I went to the shower one morning and he had hung himself with his shoestrings. kinda gross to see. the staff then took all of our shoes and belts away from us and I wasn't allowed a razor to shave with anymore. we got them back a week later.

5) there was a fat girl there with down syndrome that was a lesbian, but if she didn't take her medicine, she was a raving nymphomaniac. my first night there she came into my room and started rubbing me - I was scared out of my mind and didn't know what to do. I finally threw her aside and told the staff about her. they dragged her into her room, strapped her to her bed, and then sedated her. her room was right next to mine and it still gives me the chills hearing her screams as they tied her down. then she got back on her medication and she didn't remember any of that and was very happy when her lesbian girlfriend showed up to visit.

6) there was a pro snowboarder there that was really cool and I mostly hung out with him the whole time. he freaked out one night on tour and they sent him home and arrested him when he stepped off the plane and brought him to the hospital. he broke his hand and wrist the first night there punching through his door. they locked him up in a different room, strapped down, and I got his room with the busted lock b/c I had checked myself in and therefore was less likely to try to escape. he went three days strapped in and yelling before he was allowed to go get x-rays and was told how fucked up his hand was. then he got a cast. I got an MRI.

7) it RULED when we had to do arts and crafts. crazy people do the coolest shit if you give them arts and crafts supplies. someone always ended up with a bald spot after those sessions.

8) it also RULED when we were allowed to play basketball. I SUCK at basketball, but I totally schooled those losers.

9) the nurses were really hot. but kinda flaky.

10) every morning we would have to gather chairs around in a circle and they went around person to person and had them say what was on their mind while the staff stood around us and a doctor sat with us. they would have me take notes since I seemed to be the most mentally competant person there. for each person that would talk, I would write down their name - Rhonda: NUTS, Dave: NUTS, Joey: NUTS, etc etc.
then after it was over, I'd have to hand my "notes" over to the doctor. he never said a word about them.

11) Rhonda had no teeth and would frequently take off her shirt and sprint around the common areas and the staff would chase her... that was always fun.

there are like a million more. I'm really glad I talked my way out of that place. just tell them what they want to hear and they let you go quickly - because there are a million more waiting in line.

 

[casavant]

Well I'll be damned...

How did you end up in there in the first place, compadre??

 

[HappyScrappy]

Re: Well I'll be damned...

How did you end up in there in the first place, compadre??

attempted suicide.
there were three of us there that were roughly the same age that all tried to kill ourselves and we'd all sort of huddle in the corner and watch everyone else.

the floor above us was where they sent the serial killers, and they had 4 up there. Rochester NY for awhile had the highest serial killer/normal population ratio in the country.