help has arrived for those who posted on the sex/powerlifting thread

[IrishPower]

http://www.phallic.org/mormon-masturbation.txt

muahahahahaahahahahaha...

 

[endpoint]

I am going to use some of those tonight.

i think i will tie my hands to the bed post

 

[Geno_O]

Irish, that thread was great. I laughed my ass off. Too funny!

 

[LongBall]

Can it really be considered a full body workout unless EVERY muscle is trained?


LongBall

 

[brianmincher]

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I tried the tips from our Mormon Bretheren, and all it did was turn me into an S&M freak. I tied my hand to the bed, and involuntarily moved over and humped the shit out of it, while it was tied up and unable to get away from me. Now I can only get off when my hand is tied up. I may have to start burning my hand with candle wax for proper stimulation. I might use both hands . . . menage e twa? This paper has ruined my life!!!!

My hand is now crippled up into a claw shape, and is constantly rope burned. I have been having trouble maintaing my grip, maybe I should switch to a hook grip. I had not thought about my "problem" in some time, and had ceased admiring myself in the mirror, but that paper just brought all the haunting memories back, and I find myself lusting after my slutty hand!!

Maybe the next level of "suggestions" will include supergluing your hands together so it is impossible to touch yourself. I have been alone too long, I must go and be around some wholesome people.

B.

 

[Screwball]

Do not be ashamed, my brothers!