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I've done it twice and both times I just laugh uncontrollably to the point of crying. It's always been with a group of my best bros and they all reacted the exact same.
We thought it would be a good idea to drive through Tijuana into Rosarita where we planned to party/shroom, smoke, surf, skim board and swim at the nearest accessible beach we could find. After we set up camp and were fucking around on the surf boards, we all ate a couple caps and stems. 15min later we are all in absolute hysterics. We kept seeing a water spouting up in the middle of the ocean that we thought was a whale so we fucking concentrated on the thing like our lives depended on it and everytime we saw a geyser we would scream, chest bump, reach arounds and then we would chug tequila.
We are on this beach just as dusk was approaching when we start seeing a lot of Mexican sketch activity. A pack of 5 kids on 4 wheelers started racing by us at top speed and getting closer and closer with each pass up until the last pass where he was coming directly at us, full throttle. He slammed on the brakes and slide right into the middle of our camp site. This kid stands up on his bike, shotgun in his hand, and just stares at everyone of us devoid of any emotion. As he was backing his 4 wheeler out some fat wetback was on some motorized one man plane. It was like a hang glider but with wings. This motherfucker kept buzzing our fucking heads. Just like the other Mexican punk trying to intimidate by flying closer and closer to our heads with an AK around his back....then, within a blink of an eye...gone.
We were getting ready to pack up and get the fuck up out of this place before we could leave my friend was approached by a very random vendor asking us what we want. He opens his jacket and this dirty spic had pockets on the inside of his jacket, he had weed, hash, meth, crack, coke, white china( but who the fuck knows), Cuban cigars,cigarettes, blunts, papers, and all kinds of liquor. Dood even had condoms. He handed me one and I laughed down at him in a way to show him how fucking ridiculous he is for thinking I would fit in his disgraceful Mexican thimble condom. What a jerk. My friend asks his guy for a blanket, the one fucking think this guy did not have. My buddy pulls out his wallet and flashes a stack of hundos to this sketchy as fucking Mexican mule. So after he saw the cash he stood up and took off in a full out sprint to when we couldn't visually see him down the beach any longer.
We pack up, pile in and getting ready to pull out of the beach when this burly Mexican guy comes up to us with a nine in his hand pointed directly at my forehead. He says to me in very broken english "Gate out closed, money to leave." This fucking cocksucker is holding us up! My one friend that was with us, a marine that was suffering from severe PTSD ever since getting back from Mid East. He gets out of the car slowly, the same time pretending to be reaching in his back pocket for his bill fold. The robber says nothing but you see his suspicion written deep in his face. My friend walked to within an arms length of this guy. He took one more step forward and the guys gun raised up to my friends head. With no second thought my buddy knocks the gun away from the guy where my friend quickly recovered it. He held the gun up to him and we are all thinking 'oh he's just going to scare this asshole.' He fires a round right at the guys crotch without any warning whatsoever. You would think there was a pig being butchered with the sounds of those empty high pitched squeals coming from that guys fat mouth hole. Well I though that was the end of it...it wasn't. My friend grabs the guys pants and yanks them down in one swoop of a motion. Blood was beginning to pool around his cock and streaming down the sides of his injured ball sack. My friend pulled a hunting knife from his pocket, walks over to the bleeding heffer, grabs his entire ballsake and cuts them off in one fail swoop. He swung them around for a second as we all started laughing hysterically. The balls were shoved into his mouth and my friend recited some patriotic war quote while doing a burnout right next to the guy. Yes, cool fucking story
Lets hear them brahs
We thought it would be a good idea to drive through Tijuana into Rosarita where we planned to party/shroom, smoke, surf, skim board and swim at the nearest accessible beach we could find. After we set up camp and were fucking around on the surf boards, we all ate a couple caps and stems. 15min later we are all in absolute hysterics. We kept seeing a water spouting up in the middle of the ocean that we thought was a whale so we fucking concentrated on the thing like our lives depended on it and everytime we saw a geyser we would scream, chest bump, reach arounds and then we would chug tequila.
We are on this beach just as dusk was approaching when we start seeing a lot of Mexican sketch activity. A pack of 5 kids on 4 wheelers started racing by us at top speed and getting closer and closer with each pass up until the last pass where he was coming directly at us, full throttle. He slammed on the brakes and slide right into the middle of our camp site. This kid stands up on his bike, shotgun in his hand, and just stares at everyone of us devoid of any emotion. As he was backing his 4 wheeler out some fat wetback was on some motorized one man plane. It was like a hang glider but with wings. This motherfucker kept buzzing our fucking heads. Just like the other Mexican punk trying to intimidate by flying closer and closer to our heads with an AK around his back....then, within a blink of an eye...gone.
We were getting ready to pack up and get the fuck up out of this place before we could leave my friend was approached by a very random vendor asking us what we want. He opens his jacket and this dirty spic had pockets on the inside of his jacket, he had weed, hash, meth, crack, coke, white china( but who the fuck knows), Cuban cigars,cigarettes, blunts, papers, and all kinds of liquor. Dood even had condoms. He handed me one and I laughed down at him in a way to show him how fucking ridiculous he is for thinking I would fit in his disgraceful Mexican thimble condom. What a jerk. My friend asks his guy for a blanket, the one fucking think this guy did not have. My buddy pulls out his wallet and flashes a stack of hundos to this sketchy as fucking Mexican mule. So after he saw the cash he stood up and took off in a full out sprint to when we couldn't visually see him down the beach any longer.
We pack up, pile in and getting ready to pull out of the beach when this burly Mexican guy comes up to us with a nine in his hand pointed directly at my forehead. He says to me in very broken english "Gate out closed, money to leave." This fucking cocksucker is holding us up! My one friend that was with us, a marine that was suffering from severe PTSD ever since getting back from Mid East. He gets out of the car slowly, the same time pretending to be reaching in his back pocket for his bill fold. The robber says nothing but you see his suspicion written deep in his face. My friend walked to within an arms length of this guy. He took one more step forward and the guys gun raised up to my friends head. With no second thought my buddy knocks the gun away from the guy where my friend quickly recovered it. He held the gun up to him and we are all thinking 'oh he's just going to scare this asshole.' He fires a round right at the guys crotch without any warning whatsoever. You would think there was a pig being butchered with the sounds of those empty high pitched squeals coming from that guys fat mouth hole. Well I though that was the end of it...it wasn't. My friend grabs the guys pants and yanks them down in one swoop of a motion. Blood was beginning to pool around his cock and streaming down the sides of his injured ball sack. My friend pulled a hunting knife from his pocket, walks over to the bleeding heffer, grabs his entire ballsake and cuts them off in one fail swoop. He swung them around for a second as we all started laughing hysterically. The balls were shoved into his mouth and my friend recited some patriotic war quote while doing a burnout right next to the guy. Yes, cool fucking story
Lets hear them brahs
