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Crazy/funny one night stand stories

downunder hunter

New member
Lets hear it!

What was a funny/weird/crazy/memorable story?

Now i want to hear the craziest most fucked up experiences some of you other peeps have had!

LOL im bored
 
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Never had a one night stand, always wanted one :( in all fairness I never went out much, hence the lack of opportunity...
 
mine..i was 17 just abotu to turn 18,i had my male cusin with me he was 16..it was a normal night we were high,drunk,just got some smoke and sold some,was killing time so i said hey cuz ima jump on a yahoo chat room see if any chicks are local..BINGO found one chick in like 10mins..she was 28 red hair,recently sperated..went picked her up(its like 1am).all loaded..went to the local baseball field tag teamed her in the middle of the field,then hit it in my car..ony thing is i was kinda passing out at the same time,ben up for a couple days drinking i was running on low energy,eventluy i was liek yo,fuck my cuz i cant go..driving her home and she was giving me road head,busted all in her mouth,lmao...then my cusin made out wiht her,,SICK
 
Wow... good stuff bro. You got it all.

Road Dome
Threesome
Statitory Rape
Casual Sex
Illegal Drugs
Sex in Public

Among other things haha.
 
usually when i have one nighters its with a girl i already know but we are so fucked up we have sex. but one time i met this girl through my roomates girlfriend. talked to her one time at a party. called her friday night. said wanna come by and chill. she came over we ended up having sex and i never talked to her again.. my roomates girl still thinks im the biggest douche ever bc of it. i had a girl i was more into at the time so she got brushed aside.

nothing really special..
 
When you've had so many, it's hard to pick just one. It was titillating getting it on at work on my boss's desk. I was the night supervisor at the time so just the thought that anyone could walk in on us was arousing. Another time I almost got caught at a bar.
 
When you've had so many, it's hard to pick just one. It was titillating getting it on at work on my boss's desk. I was the night supervisor at the time so just the thought that anyone could walk in on us was arousing. Another time I almost got caught at a bar.


u can be my boss:chomp:
 
I went to a bar one night in San Antonio, just there to have a few beers. Noticed one dude so drunk he couldn't say his name. He was all decked out like he was going to be on TV, he was trying hard to get with this chick. I was just standing there in my jeans and t-shirt. Well, the girls friend came over and asked if I would go talk to her to get the drunk idiot to leave her alone. Long story short, I ended up banging both of them together. They loved it, and I was very well taken care of that night. I was 29, they were both 40'ish. Unreal!
 
hey, those are normal stories, tell some better ones. with details....
mine are all long, I have written them here before so I'm trying to locate them. If not I'll hunt& peck them out again if I have to.... I'm wanting to find the one with the chick and her knives...
 
I went to a bar one night in San Antonio, just there to have a few beers. Noticed one dude so drunk he couldn't say his name. He was all decked out like he was going to be on TV, he was trying hard to get with this chick. I was just standing there in my jeans and t-shirt. Well, the girls friend came over and asked if I would go talk to her to get the drunk idiot to leave her alone. Long story short, I ended up banging both of them together. They loved it, and I was very well taken care of that night. I was 29, they were both 40'ish. Unreal!

The chick and the drunk dude?
 
hey, those are normal stories, tell some better ones. with details....
mine are all long, I have written them here before so I'm trying to locate them. If not I'll hunt& peck them out again if I have to.... I'm wanting to find the one with the chick and her knives...

Chick with knives? LOL

Ive got a few, Ill share one of mine

I was at the horse races it was the spring carnival so it was packed! I always like going to the races because you can get suited up and wasted and all the fine ladies are dressing to impress with their races dresses and headpeices and such.

Well I was ther with my buddies and their girlfriends, which all happen to be friends with my girlfriend who didnt come we were on the rocks at this point in our relationship.

I notice this gorgeous girl talking to a girl from my group, shes blonde, natural tan, natural big boobs, fit as fuck. My type of girl! they had the same dress on so there talking shit. then she comes and sits next to me and were flirting like crazy and im tryin to keep it on the down low cause I didnt want eveyone seeing naturally

I ask her if she wants to go get a drink from inside the stadium shes keen its almost like she knows whats going to happen next because she makes the first move! we get to the end of the massive drink line and start making out. shes grabbing my hand and puttin it up her dress and im thinking in my head this is fucking incredible!! I grab her hand and i say lets go find somehwere to fuck. I see a service elevetator so im like hell yeah havent done this before!!

We wait for the elevator but there a is a cleaner insde so we go down to the bottom level and it takes us to a little passageway that leads to under the stadium stairs, so we can see hundreds of people around but no one can see us, or so we thought. I lift her up on a ledge get her boobsd out drop my pants and start doin the damn thang!! She is absolutely smoking her boobs were perfect vajaja was tight and so pretty she was moaning I was loving life! I was that excited It didnt take me lond to bust my nut I peer to my left and just as i bust 6 security guards come rushing around the corner "you cant fucking do that here mate!' LOL So im standing there with my mauve shirt on pants around my ankles, split second after i bust my nut and my big boner was out for all to see I turn to the chick in front of me and all I can do is laugh

The girl was so embarrassed, they threatened to press charges as they escorted both of us from the venue by that stage there were about ten of them It was a long ass walk threw thousands of people I didnt care though i was as proud as can be, i was even sharing my story with one of the cool maori security. I had to tell my friends that I got kicked out for bumpin some charlie in the toilets and none of them suspected anything lol the perfect crime, ahhh the memories :D
 
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Chick with knives? LOL

Ive got a few, Ill share one of mine

I was at the horse races it was the spring carnival so it was packed! I always like going to the races because you can get suited up and wasted and all the fine ladies are dressing to impress with their races dresses and headpeices and such.

Well I was ther with my buddies and their girlfriends, which all happen to be friends with my girlfriend who didnt come we were on the rocks at this point in our relationship.

I notice this gorgeous girl talking to a girl from my group, shes blonde, natural tan, natural big boobs, fit as fuck. My type of girl! they had the same dress on so there taling shit. then she comes and sits next to me and were flirting like crazy and im tryin to keep it on the down low cause I didnt want eveyone seeing naturally

I ask her if she wants to go get a drink from inside the stadium shes keen its almost like she knows whats going to happen next because she makes the first move! we get to the end of the massive drink line and start making out. shes grabbing my hand and puttin it up her dress and im thinking in my head this is fucking incredible!! I grab her hand and i say lets go find somehwere to fuck. I see a service elevetator so im like hell yeah havent done this before!!

We wait for the elevator but there a is a cleaner insde so we go down to the bottom level and it takes us to a little passageway that leads to under the stadium stairs, so we can see hundreds of people around but no one can see us, or so we thought. I lift her up on a ledge get her boobsd out drop my pants and start doin the damn thang!! She is absolutely smoking her boobs were perfect vajaja was tight and so pretty she was moaning I was loving life! I was that excited It didnt take me lond to bust my nut I peer to my left and just as i bust 6 security guards come rushing around the corner "you cant fucking do that here mate!' LOL So im standing there with my mauve shirt on pants around my ankles and a big boner I turn to the chick in front of me and all I can do is laugh

The girl was so embarrassed, they threatened to press charges as they escorted both of us from the venue by that stage there were about ten of them It was a long ass walk threw thousands of people, I had to tell my friends that I got kicked out for bumpin some charlie in the toilets and none of them suspected anything lol the perfect crime, ahhh the memories :D

LMAO! thats more like it!! good one.... mate

I have one here also about fucking this chick in a club on the dance floor, that one was funny as fuck too, atleast for me.... lol
 
mine..i was 17 just abotu to turn 18,i had my male cusin with me he was 16..it was a normal night we were high,drunk,just got some smoke and sold some,was killing time so i said hey cuz ima jump on a yahoo chat room see if any chicks are local..BINGO found one chick in like 10mins..she was 28 red hair,recently sperated..went picked her up(its like 1am).all loaded..went to the local baseball field tag teamed her in the middle of the field,then hit it in my car..ony thing is i was kinda passing out at the same time,ben up for a couple days drinking i was running on low energy,eventluy i was liek yo,fuck my cuz i cant go..driving her home and she was giving me road head,busted all in her mouth,lmao...then my cusin made out wiht her,,SICK

Did your cousin know when he was making out with her that you just busted in her mouth? lol
 
lol well i guess i got to since your calling me out

it was a stormy night in blahblah,mississippi another noraml rainy night like the last 6months have been so a boy got bored and made his way to manhood once again,he orginally posted an add on craiglist for shits and gigles,after about 4hours of getting fake bots and scam email ,i seen an real email,and she wa slike hey whats up sexy(ok i threw that part in there haha) she was like hey i live near blahblah,ms i was like hey that 6mins away,she was like i am married but i need something else on the side i was like hey i need a nut,she was like my husband is cool with it as lonbg as he can watch,i was like woah thats wierd him just staring at me,then she was like well i always wanted 2 dicks in me,i said well atleast thats not as wierd?is it wierd? so i was like game im sold ,so the night goes by then the next day comes and at 3pm we meet up(i debated afor a lil while before meeting up,what if it was a set up,etc.i mean i grew up in the gethoo i know how this shit works lol and i know people are crazy)so i was like well ill go and ill just take whatever comes my way,so i get there and she walked out in this smoking tight yellow shirt,and white booty shorts,cam up to me huged me,meet her husband(who is like 120 lbs looking gooffy ass crack dude,so i was like to myself lol im not worried about this,we talked outside for a couple mins,then went inside sat on thier big sofa watching thier 50 inch plasma she sat next to me layed down on her back and said start whever you want and have fun,(in my head i was like oo yea)so the shirt came off,i sucked on those sexy nipss for a sec felt my way down,boom her shorts and thong on the other side of the room that shit came off quick,she layed on this liek stool thing,so i went down on her,ate that pretty pink out,lol no lie she was like oo that feels so good never had that done before,she cam a couple times within 10mins,ummwell her turn to return the favour so she got down on her knees swallowed my cock and balls,shit felt good,umm ti didnt get to hit it,thier neighborhor called them and said they were going to bring some food over and they paniced said ill have to go,and we can meet back up,but before i left,i busted all up in her mouth(i dont care if i never hear back from her)umm ehh thats about it lol,,i fucke dup tho,i took some nyquil that morning and i think that helped me not get it up idk what the fuck happen lol first time i had troubleanyway it was an interseting oral session,was fun tatay fucking her tho,that was a first for me..I LOVE BIG FAKE BOOBS


lol funny side note they were gonna meet me at the end of the road becuase its alot of dirt roads out here easy to get lost,and i seen someone thier(didnt dawn on to me they were just checking there mail)so i htought it was them and started to follow em and i got all the way up to thier house i followed em,then she called me and was like where are u at,lol i thought that was funny so i just hit that baby in revers and left i know those people where like who the fuck is that and why they following me


weird thigg was messing with a married women in front of her husband,if he wasnt there i would have had her doing all kind of freaky kinky things,

hey u go nan just for you lol here what she looks like

http://i957.photobucket.com/albums/ae53/buddycoolj101/me053.jpg
 
I aughta just get Nan to phone me and transcribe this. I'm a horrible typist person. It tkes me so long I give the Cliff's Notes as not to have to write it all out. I have so many thereads and posts I couldn't find the stories using the search... I'll type one.

It was at a club, I was eyeing this hawt blond, short minidress, skintight, FMPs, I thought she was prol;ly a stripper, and she turned out to be. We were talking, she was gorgeous, but seemed a little aloof, distant, but not in a bad way, she was just different. Sexy as hell, just a little strange. We danced, and had a good time, but we didn't have the "connection" thing that you sometimes get, she wanted to fuck me and I deffinately wanted to fuck her, but that was about it. Kinda funny really.

We went to her apartment, it was in a bad part of the city, but at that point I didn't care. her apartment was decent, clean, she obviously had a roommate from the looks of things. She asked me to come back to her room, she wanted to show me something. I thought I heard he say, "My collection of knives...". knives?, humm, there's the door, it's not to late, all that was running through my mind. I wasn't really scared, it was just wierd, I don't know a better word to describe the whole thing. Well, anyay, i walked back to her room and she was getting this small locker out. She sat on her bed, dress up to her thighs, I had no problem seeing her tiny white lacy thong, shaved bush, and it looked good. She was talikng to me, but not looking at me, all the while pulling out these knives and telling me who made them, what they were used for, etc. She opened everyone of them up and handled them, not just normal like, but with a sexual mannor, lustful, running them down her arms, legs, always talking. I was just sitting there dumnfounded. She must have taken out 25 or so and then she said that she wanted to show me her favorite. It was a curved bladded single blade, it looked like a cat's claw, sharp pointed, razor sharp. She actually shaved her arm hair with the damn thing. She had some sexual need for this knife. She stood up off the bed and had me unzip her dress and let it fall to the floor. She was freaking banging, her body was muscular, her tits were natural full C's or small D's, just fuckin awsome body. She fixed the pillows behind her and lay back against the headboard, pulled her panties off and handed them to me. I watched as she took the knife and ran it all along her arms, neck, down her legs, her eyes closed, just breathing hard and sliding the knife along her. She was looking at me from time to ime, I was sitting there fully clothed, with the other 30 or so knives all open on this bed, watching. She pulled her knees to her and opened her legs to expose her pussy. With one hand she carressed her skin and the other took the point of this freakin knife and started at mid thigh drawing the knife across her skin. She moved her hips as if she was getting fingered, she inched the blade closer and closer to her pussy up one leg to her inner thigh, then the other. She was using enough force to leave blood trails but just soft enough not to cut the skin, but you could see the tracks she left. She got all the way to her labia and still pushed the knife into her skin, loving every minute of it. I was in a trance, I just sat there, it was sexy as hell. She finally sat up and asked me to touch her skin and feel the marks. I did as I was asked as one well placed swipe of the knife and I would have been decapitated. I felt her upper thighs, felt her wet pussy, licked my fingers and pushed them in her. She sat there and stared at me as I did all this and never said a word. She got up and led me into the bathroom, she started the shower and started taking my clothes off. When she got to my underware she grabbed my major hardon and dropped to her knees and started giving me head. My knees were shaking as I started to cum and she stopped and led me into the shower. We touched each other, soaped and washed each other, kissed, and did alot of sexual things short of fucking. We got out and dried off, I picked her up and placed her on the bed, I pushed her legs apart and started to eat her pussy like a madman. She came extreemely hard and I was loving every minute if it. After a few seconds, she through a comforter on the floor and pulled me down and mounted me facing me. She had some excellent pussy, she was just a freaking sex machine. It obviously wasn't her first rodeo, that woman could fuck. She knew tricks that I haven't seen since. It was simply marvelous. Her perfect tits, small tight stomach, muscular legs and pussy. It was sexy, it was raw, very physical, fingernails, biting, sweaty, it was extreemly exciting.

After we finished, she got back on the bed. As "into" me and the sex as she was 3 minutes before, she was now just as sepperated mentally. She went back to the melancholy, aloof, distant mindset that she had earlier. I stood up and sat on the side of her bed. She sat there, and with a calm voice, said, "I'm going to bed, you can go or my roommate will take care from here if you want." "Roommate? what roommate, and who is it, is it a he or a she? And where is this room mate? 'I asked her. " IDK, your roomamte, where is she? She said, "she's home now, she looked in the room and saw us, she'll like you." She went to her bedroom door and called her name. ( now remember, I just got through with some WILD ass sex a few minutes before, still standing there in my underwear) When she called for her roomate, this tall freaking sexy ass brunette walked out of her door and over to us. She was awsome, I shit you not. (holds hand up) She had long cold black hair, must have been 5'8" at least, and nice, nice body with bigger tits than the other girl. All I can do is stand there and try to look like I'm not shitting all over myself. She told her roommate my name and that I was a nice guy and she would like me. With that, she grabbed my hand and walked off towards the living room area. I gave the other girl a last glance as she closed her door. The new girl, was super nice. Seemed like a smart regular type of person, polite and all. She was dressed in a see-through black nightgown, but she was just as comfortable as if she was fully dressed and we were long time friends, even though she just met me and didn't even know my last name, just I was Tom. She kinda laughed, and said, " I see you met my roommate. I bet she showed you her knife collection...huhh" I just smiled and said yeah, she did. We made small talk and sat on the sofa. I couldn't help but drool over her, she was simply stunning, and normal. lol She moved closer to me and started to kiss her way down my chest to my growing hardon. She had my dick in her mouth and it was good, she was good, IT was good. I started to feel her body, it was hard, tight, she obviously worked hard on it to keep that fit. ( it turned out that they were both strippers, made all the money they needed during the week with their regulars and didn't have to work weekends ) I have a thing for long black hair, she gave me the full stripper dance, grind, hair wipe like they do, it was really cool. It was funny, I just met this girl 20 minutes ago, but the "connection" thing that I never got with the other, we immediately had it. I really '' in lust" and like with this person. We made love in every imaginable way on the couch, the easy chair, the floor, she was simply fantastic. She was the first girl to ever tell me "fuck me in my ass", it was always such a taboo thing that I had only had a couple of GF's let me, muchless tell me to. We genuinely had a fun time, she was a great girl. We sat ther talking after a while, I really did enjoy her company, so I wasn't like looking for an excuse to leave. We looked up and the first girl was walking into the room, she just smiled and told her roommate, "I told you that you'ld like him", smiled a bit and left. I coluldn't leave without having another round with this sex goddess, she was willing and ready too so we fucked again and I did my best to be polite and say good bye. I mean what do you say, " Nice fucking you both, see yall later."

That's a true story, oh the days of my youth. Drugs, sex, whiskey, all my other money was just wasted....

I hope yall like the story and appreciate the amount of time and energy it takes for me to write something that long....

TxB
 
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. She had some excellent pussy, she was just a freaking sex machine. It obviously wasn't her first rodeo, that woman could fuck. She knew tricks that I haven't seen since. It was simply marvelous. Her perfect tits, small tight stomach, muscular legs and pussy. It was sexy, it was raw, very physical, fingernails, biting, sweaty, it was extreemly exciting.
Oh my what a story, I almost need a cigarette and I haven't even smoked in a looong time :p

I'm sure it's hard to describe but what kind of tricks? :evil:
 
Oh my what a story, I almost need a cigarette and I haven't even smoked in a looong time :p

I'm sure it's hard to describe but what kind of tricks? :evil:

mainly body positions, but she had control over muscles in her pussy like one may have on their bicept or calf, She could grip my dick with as much strength as a good handshake. She was VERY limber ( they both were, I guess from dancing, using the pole, etc.) She knew when to hold/cup my balls to give the maximum pleasure sensation w/o causing an immediate ejaculation. She was ALL about the pleasure of sex, not necessarily just the orgasm. Nan, I remember her squatting over me, grinding hard on her clit, then she'd go for something like reverse cowgirl, just fucking the shit outta me. She was able to lean back and still bring her hips up and down with enough force to make it feel wonderful. The other girl was just as good, not as physical, but had a body that you could move in positions that would normally hurt or atleast be uncomfortable for a regular woman. If you could put in in her, she'd be able to hold the position and let me fuck her hard.
If there was ever 2 girls who thought a little pain was pleasure, it was these two. They loved oral, but they really wanted you to go to work.... and keep it hard. More ways than one.....
 
mainly body positions, but she had control over muscles in her pussy like one may have on their bicept or calf, She could grip my dick with as much strength as a good handshake. She was VERY limber ( they both were, I guess from dancing, using the pole, etc.) She knew when to hold/cup my balls to give the maximum pleasure sensation w/o causing an immediate ejaculation. She was ALL about the pleasure of sex, not necessarily just the orgasm. Nan, I remember her squatting over me, grinding hard on her clit, then she'd go for something like reverse cowgirl, just fucking the shit outta me. She was able to lean back and still bring her hips up and down with enough force to make it feel wonderful. The other girl was just as good, not as physical, but had a body that you could move in positions that would normally hurt or at least be uncomfortable for a regular woman. If you could put in in her, she'd be able to hold the position and let me fuck her hard.
If there was ever 2 girls who thought a little pain was pleasure, it was these two. They loved oral, but they really wanted you to go to work.... and keep it hard. More ways than one.....

Nice description:cool:, mastering PC muscle movement is hard, I can move them and the grasp is noticeable but not gripping but in all fairness I stopped using my keggel exerciser.... and reverse cowgirl position is THE best position, specially if you manage to have your feet touch the ground (like on the edge of the bed) :evil::chomp::biggrin:
 
Nice description:cool:, mastering PC muscle movement is hard, I can move them and the grasp is noticeable but not gripping but in all fairness I stopped using my keggel exerciser.... and reverse cowgirl position is THE best position, specially if you manage to have your feet touch the ground (like on the edge of the bed) :evil::chomp::biggrin:

These women were professional dancers, by that I mean it wasn't a side job, they made a living at it. Using the pole requires alot of strength and body control, and most good routines have regular splits (Chinese if they're really good), standing flat-footed w/ one leg straight up the pole, etc. That would have been these girls...

At 5'1", you may have better luck touching the sideboard on the bed, the floor might be a stretch. :) My bed is waiste level on me, just right for standing on the floor and doing major damage while on her back or I like it while she lays on her side and rests a leg on my shoulder. Great view that way, not as good as a reverse cowgirl, but good never-the-less....

I have a funny one, still sexy, but I don't have the time to write it right now. It has to do with fucking at a club... I'll try to get it written this afternoon.....

Ladies, yall feel free to chime in at any time... :-) Maybe we need to go recruit some thread members from C&C.... To bad GG isn't here, she had some DAMN good ones!
 
Well guys im at it again,it hasnt happened yet,but its suppose to happen tonight,,i been talking to this chick,:) got her wanting to get gangbanged by me my older brother and my best freind i grew up with should be fun tonight
 
lol strippers are fun,but gotta be careful with that hiv std herper shit

Ha ha. You're starting to sound like me. You keep that up and you'll get a scolding too. lol Irighti is from the 80s when things were still carefree...

I don't have any stories to match these as far as danger and public exposure, but I've heard the craziest most taboo thing from one BI guy I met. I wish I could flush it out of my head. I'll spare you the eye bugging facts. There's something out local's story w/his cousin that triggered a recall....

Something not so horrifying...um.... and innocent really-

I was in high school and just got devirginized at 17 by my best guy friend (we still keep in touch). I was volunteering at a camp and all the kids had gone home and all that was left was us high school volunteers and the hippy doping camp leaders who busted out champagne and let us have some. (No adult to kiddy action went on that I know of. But minor to minor ...well.... stuff was going down.) B/c of the hippy atmosphere we had all week long been showering together, girls and boys and such in an "open minded" innocent fashion.
There was a guy I had a crush on for a long time. Most of us knew each other and were friends from similar circles.

So, it was the last night of camp and the resident pyro made a huge bonfire out of shipping crate/planks. We teens were skinny dipping in the dark and running amok.

And, I got my wish... walked out into the pitch dark in the middle of a field with my gf and this guy. She got uncomfortable w/his vibe and walked away b/c he was too "animalistic" she said later told me. He was my 2nd guy and the first to try as many different positions as possible like carrying me in front of him and possibly the first I gave head to. That was so long ago. I think it was even the first time a guy used the word "bitch" during sex. So fuzzy....I'm getting old....

Most fetish sex: The BI guy liked to suck on my toes and he licked my ass which was pleasantly surprisingly pleasant.

Most odd sex: One bastard chatting up a storm during the whole thing like it was over coffee. I wanted to say STFU!

Most hard core: Typical really- hair pulling, ass slapping, telling me I'm a naughty little girl who likes to F. Can't stand any of that crap! But, geez louise he's the only one to make me cum w/fingers and mouth- FULL slot machine cash out. He was a lot fatter than I normally would have accepted, but I had a call girl fantasy I wanted to live out and so pretended he was a John I couldn't hand pick in order to get through it. That mind set has always fascinated me. Can't say I got a lot out of it now that I know what it's like. Was just curious.
 
lol well i guess i got to since your calling me out

it was a stormy night in blahblah,mississippi another noraml rainy night like the last 6months have been so a boy got bored and made his way to manhood once again,he orginally posted an add on craiglist for shits and gigles,after about 4hours of getting fake bots and scam email ,i seen an real email,and she wa slike hey whats up sexy(ok i threw that part in there haha) she was like hey i live near blahblah,ms i was like hey that 6mins away,she was like i am married but i need something else on the side i was like hey i need a nut,she was like my husband is cool with it as lonbg as he can watch,i was like woah thats wierd him just staring at me,then she was like well i always wanted 2 dicks in me,i said well atleast thats not as wierd?is it wierd? so i was like game im sold ,so the night goes by then the next day comes and at 3pm we meet up(i debated afor a lil while before meeting up,what if it was a set up,etc.i mean i grew up in the gethoo i know how this shit works lol and i know people are crazy)so i was like well ill go and ill just take whatever comes my way,so i get there and she walked out in this smoking tight yellow shirt,and white booty shorts,cam up to me huged me,meet her husband(who is like 120 lbs looking gooffy ass crack dude,so i was like to myself lol im not worried about this,we talked outside for a couple mins,then went inside sat on thier big sofa watching thier 50 inch plasma she sat next to me layed down on her back and said start whever you want and have fun,(in my head i was like oo yea)so the shirt came off,i sucked on those sexy nipss for a sec felt my way down,boom her shorts and thong on the other side of the room that shit came off quick,she layed on this liek stool thing,so i went down on her,ate that pretty pink out,lol no lie she was like oo that feels so good never had that done before,she cam a couple times within 10mins,ummwell her turn to return the favour so she got down on her knees swallowed my cock and balls,shit felt good,umm ti didnt get to hit it,thier neighborhor called them and said they were going to bring some food over and they paniced said ill have to go,and we can meet back up,but before i left,i busted all up in her mouth(i dont care if i never hear back from her)umm ehh thats about it lol,,i fucke dup tho,i took some nyquil that morning and i think that helped me not get it up idk what the fuck happen lol first time i had troubleanyway it was an interseting oral session,was fun tatay fucking her tho,that was a first for me..I LOVE BIG FAKE BOOBS


lol funny side note they were gonna meet me at the end of the road becuase its alot of dirt roads out here easy to get lost,and i seen someone thier(didnt dawn on to me they were just checking there mail)so i htought it was them and started to follow em and i got all the way up to thier house i followed em,then she called me and was like where are u at,lol i thought that was funny so i just hit that baby in revers and left i know those people where like who the fuck is that and why they following me


weird thigg was messing with a married women in front of her husband,if he wasnt there i would have had her doing all kind of freaky kinky things,

hey u go nan just for you lol here what she looks like

http://i957.photobucket.com/albums/ae53/buddycoolj101/me053.jpg

Dude, I don't mean to poke you with a stick or anything, but I can barely read a word you wrote. Is English a second language for you?

B-
 
no its my first English,but my mind is like always on speed its zooming cant stay focus on one thing,and since then my fingers cant type as fast as my brain speaks..use to be on xanex to make me slow down but screw that
 
funny one.. I don't have alot of time but i'm gonna try to do it justice.

I met this Baylor U. chick, they are usually ultraconservative, and she was. As slutty as the other girls were in the other story, this girl was the polar opposite. Inexperienced, innocent, sweet, she could have been a poster child for Baylor. Really naturally beautiful, sandy blond shoulder leagth hair, about 110 lbs, fit like a cheerleader/ gymnast, she had 34 C's but she kept them very much hidden. I'm not sure how we ever got together, but we did. I was already out of school, about 24 or so, so why this 18 year old wanted to go out IDK, maybe the older bad boy thing, who knows. Anyway, we did have a few dates, she was very nice, we did "nice" things, ie, movies, dinner, and I'd take her back to her dorm, on time mind you. I was on my best behavior with her, I treated her well. ( little did she know that I went back to the club after dropping her off and took care of other business)
Any way, we had been dating a while and we were getiing to the point where there was heavy petting, hands into the pants. etc. I took her to my favorite dance club, it was kinda like a second home, I was there 5-6 nights a week. I knew everyone that worked there and most of the patrons. We sat at the table, ordered drinks, danced, nothing unsual. She wasn't a "drinker", and had never had more than one or two, but this night I guess she felt like partying. A few shots later, she was sitting on my lap, she was kissing me like "Yowzer!", seeming not to be thinking about the public display we were making. I wanted to keep kissing her and all, but not there. I knew that the dance floor wall was an accordian type, the type you can open and push together to open it, it slpit the dance floor in half if the other side of the club wasn't needed. The side door to get to the other side was never locked, so we stepped through it into the darkness. The music is thumping, the place is rocking, it has about 100 or so people in it. We stand there in the darkness, the only light was from under the thin accordion wall, it was about 1/2 an inch off the floor, so we had a little light. I proceeded to kiss and fondle each other, she was damn near animalistic, a side I never knew she had. We stood there groping each other, then I sat down on the floor, the dance floor, you could see under the wall and watch peoples feet as they danced. You could hear everyone just feet away. I put her on her back, unbuttoned her shirt and unclasp the front-closuer bra, lucky me. I had her magnificent tits in my hands and mouth, they were simply divine, rock-hard nipples and medium brown aerolas. As she lay there I could see her beautiful face, firm tits and flat stomach in the light, she was sexy as hell. I licked my way down her stomach, kissing, touching, rubbing, making her squirm and pant. We both glanced from time to time through the bottom of the dance floor. I could have easily grabbed someones toe or shoe. LOL
I had her really excited, I rubbed her pussy over her pants and finally she unbuttoned them to give me access. I pulled her hips off the floor and pulled her pants and panties to fer feet. I kiseed and licked my way to her cute little trimmed bush. I nibbled, teased, and sucked on her near pubescent vagina. I LOVE eating pussy, crave it, I've been told that I do a pretty fair job of it as well. I was going to town on that beautiful little box, her knees were spread wide so i could have enough room to suck her clit and put a finger in as well. She was going nuts. I stood up and dropped my pants to the floor, my dick was so hard that a cat couldn't have scatched it. I wanted to fuck this PYT. And I was going to. I kneeled down again covering her body with mine. I could feel her heart pounding, as we lay there in the moment. i wanted to make sure not to hurt her when i put my dick in her so I went down on her pussy again, this time I was trying to make her cum. And.....then. The manager opened the accordion door and there we were laying on the dance floor while he pushed the wall apart. It took about 5 seconds to realize that there were 2 people on the floor fucking , stop and close it again. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I looked up at the people and the looks on their faces were priceless! All I could do was laugh. I mean, what CAN you do. I was nekkid with my american average sticking up to the cieling. I was on the dance floor with a beautiful chick and everyone saw me. That pretty much tells it all. Now, SHE was mortified. Absolutely a wreck. I tried to console her as she pulled her clothes on a ran at full gallop out of the club. I tried to tell her it would be ok but she'd have none of it. I took her back to her dorm, she was not to be consoled. I felt sorry for her. Now, for me, who the fuck cares. I took my happy ass BACK to the club and walked in like I owned the place. I got a few high 5's from the guys and acouple of chicks smiled and made eye contact with "the look." The look that says, "I want you to eat my pussy on the dancefloor of a crowded nightclub and don't stop till I get mine" look. lol And yes, i did pick up, por got picked up as it was, from a chick who was standing over us as the door opened, she was impressed with my American average or either the wetness of the pussy I happened to be eating, no matter, whichever one it was, she wanted to fuck.... and I obliged,
 
. I tried to tell her it would be ok but she'd have none of it. I took her back to her dorm, she was not to be consoled.

I wonder where she is now? In a convent? A missionary in Uganda? LOL! She at least has the "I was drunk." excuse. Wow, that could have sexually messed her up for life. Now evertime a guy goes down on her, she will always also see the faces of the people when that wall. opened! Oh, poor thing! And the guys won't understand why she doesn't like it...

Or, she will be forever disappointed that all the others aren't as good as you were and she's still looking for you? So, what was the song playing? Frankie Goes to Hollywood? "Relax"? Or was this the 70's? Donna Summer's "Love to Love You Baby"? (The raunchiest moans in a pop song EVER!) -1975- Must play while reading any future IRIGHTI stories...
 
I wonder where she is now? In a convent? A missionary in Uganda? LOL! She at least has the "I was drunk." excuse. Wow, that could have sexually messed her up for life. Now evertime a guy goes down on her, she will always also see the faces of the people when that wall. opened! Oh, poor thing! And the guys won't understand why she doesn't like it...

Or, she will be forever disappointed that all the others aren't as good as you were and she's still looking for you? So, what was the song playing? Frankie Goes to Hollywood? "Relax"? Or was this the 70's? Donna Summer's "Love to Love You Baby"? (The raunchiest moans in a pop song EVER!) -1975- Must play while reading any future IRIGHTI stories...


LOL, it was more like this...



or this:

 
OK. so i think this is a bit "funny". Meet a younger chick on line. Go out for a drink. Very reserved. Hardly talks. Back to my place. Sit on the couch. She is frozen so i say there is a spare bed for her. She says she DOES want something. She asks if i could "carry her" .I say yeah i guess so. She says, "but really - carry like a child". So a bit of weird silence. She asks again. So i go "ok" and carry her around the house like a child. We go to bed and she is silent. Im happy to go to bed and forget this one. But she wants the action. But is like one of those fake sleeping porno rape actors. She is still keen, so i undress this rag doll and fuck her more and more nasty. She continues silent rag doll pose. So i try pillow over face and fuck her that way until she finally makes a response (to avoid suffocation it seems). Ask is she ok. She says yes. Dont stop. So flip her over and finish from behind. I go to sleep. She remains silent and still. Drive her home in silence next morning.

If any members have psychoanalytic training id be grateful for analysis.
 
OK. so i think this is a bit "funny". Meet a younger chick on line. Go out for a drink. Very reserved. Hardly talks. Back to my place. Sit on the couch. She is frozen so i say there is a spare bed for her. She says she DOES want something. She asks if i could "carry her" .I say yeah i guess so. She says, "but really - carry like a child". So a bit of weird silence. She asks again. So i go "ok" and carry her around the house like a child. We go to bed and she is silent. Im happy to go to bed and forget this one. But she wants the action. But is like one of those fake sleeping porno rape actors. She is still keen, so i undress this rag doll and fuck her more and more nasty. She continues silent rag doll pose. So i try pillow over face and fuck her that way until she finally makes a response (to avoid suffocation it seems). Ask is she ok. She says yes. Dont stop. So flip her over and finish from behind. I go to sleep. She remains silent and still. Drive her home in silence next morning.

If any members have psychoanalytic training id be grateful for analysis.

LOL, that's TOO funny! thanks for that one....
 
OK. so i think this is a bit "funny". Meet a younger chick on line. Go out for a drink. Very reserved. Hardly talks. Back to my place. Sit on the couch. She is frozen so i say there is a spare bed for her. She says she DOES want something. She asks if i could "carry her" .I say yeah i guess so. She says, "but really - carry like a child". So a bit of weird silence. She asks again. So i go "ok" and carry her around the house like a child. We go to bed and she is silent. Im happy to go to bed and forget this one. But she wants the action. But is like one of those fake sleeping porno rape actors. She is still keen, so i undress this rag doll and fuck her more and more nasty. She continues silent rag doll pose. So i try pillow over face and fuck her that way until she finally makes a response (to avoid suffocation it seems). Ask is she ok. She says yes. Dont stop. So flip her over and finish from behind. I go to sleep. She remains silent and still. Drive her home in silence next morning.

If any members have psychoanalytic training id be grateful for analysis.

haha yeah thats a good one bro!!
 
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