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3-some question

Alkybanshee

Alkybanshee

Active member
I have the best girl ever, she is absolutley beautiful, kick ass bod and gives me more sex than you could imagine. Both of us are 24, work out all of the time and are in very good shape. We have been together for about a year and we have a very physical relationship (always have). Heres the deal, we have been discussing a possible threesome, with another woman I'm definatley straight, shes has never been with another chick before and wonders about it. We often visit the local topless establishment and she wants to start going to swingers bars to look for girls. Of course I'm all for it in the aspect of 2 chicks at once, hell yea! But, we are planning on getting married and I dont want this to be an issue. She is the very secure with our relationship but she is the jealous type. My question is should we go for it? And if so, should it be with a stranger or someone we know. She has a friend who is hot and they like to get drunk together and kiss, shes a slut and I know she would do it and me if the three of us were drunk, ect, ect ect..... Please help, I like hearing what everyone has to say!!
 
I feel where you are coming from, I am kinda in the same position. My girl tells me that she is afraid that I would enjoy the other girl too much. I know that's the point but she means enjoy like want to be with. It is like playing with fire. If you were not thinking of getting married I would say go for it, but since you are I would be rather weary. If you decide to go with it then I would go for a stranger. The friend thing might mess with the whole friendship in the long run, I would always feel weird if it didn't go well. But if it went well, hell hold on for the ride. You struck a goldmine my friend. Talk to the Kronks, they have exp. with this stuff!
 
in your situation, it sounds like one of those things that could come bite you in the ass somewhere down the road.. but only because you are planning to get married.. if she is even a little jealous, she could come out of the experience with a real bad taste in her mouth.. because i gaurantee that you will be probably be paying more attention to her friend because she is something different and new/exciting.. if you are crazy about your girl, there is no reason to risk it IMHO
 
I will tell you what I did when the idea of inviting a female came up. I have never been involved in a threesome but my ex and I talked about it the last year of our relationship.

Hopefully this will help in answering all of your questions and providing advice.

The way your g/f feels is quite normal, I think. I also pondered about my partner being with person outside of what we would do together (the 3 of us). The best you can do is assure your g/f that you love her and you never plan on doing such thing without her there. (Provided you feel this way) That helped ease my worries and calm my fears. What also helped me was our decision to find someone outside of our local area and make it a one time thing as opposed to doing it with someone we knew or someone that may know people we knew. That may or may not be something you care to do. For us we felt this was best based on several other things.

Prior to ever doing this you and your g/f MUST discuss what you both see as acceptable acts during your 3some. For example, I at one point didn't want my partner to have intercourse even if he used protection with this girl. I did later change my mind. If your g/f doesn't want you to do certain things this should be discussed and vice versa. You may want to share "the list" of unacceptable acts with your 3rd party or you may not want to. It all depends. Some people feel its best to meet a random person whereas others feel its best to have a 3some with someone they already know. Talking about what you both expect and/or will feel comfortable with each other doing during a 3some will avoid problems in your relationship later on.

If you plan on just going out and meeting someone I would think that its best to go out to a club/bar. Have your g/f just dance by herself or vice versa. She is apt to find a girl that she finds attractive or vice versa. If you both have the same taste in girls then its even better as she(or you) can "make a move" without having to worry if the girl will be someone you will both like. You should sit somewhere were you can see your g/f dancing and picking up girls, this will also arouse you so you get something out of it as well. So your g/f dances with her and what not and then if she feels the girl is interested she can take it further and hopefully that will lead to you guys going home or somewhere else with this girl.

If you plan on doing this with someone you already know and have in mind. I would make sure that this girl is into 3somes. If you are certain the best way to make it happen without being blunt would be to invite her over for dinner at your house. Have some drinks, etc. and then take it from there.

Personally I would never go to a swingers club. But that's my own personal decision based on many things. If that's your thing then go for it, too!

If you plan on marriage down the road and you see this as a possible problem down the road but you both still want to try it I would suggest making the 3rd party be a stranger so that its less worrysome in some ways but then again it can be riskier in other ways.

I hope this helps. If you wondered about something else that I didn't cover or have any other questions feel free to ask.

Enjoy your possible threesome!
 
OUCH

already sounds BAD> Ive been through this... girl and I had a threesome with another girl and when she saw me inside her got very upset (waited till after to say anything though)


Explain to her VERY clearly that she has to leave her jealousies at the door... start slow and see how she responds... go down on the other chick WITH your girl... maybe fuck your girl while she is going down on the other then slowly work your way in... if she scoffs... back off.

But talking about it beforehand is utmost important.


BTW Swingers clubs are fun... but if your girl has a problem with a threesome... she would lose her fucking mind in a swingers club. Women will be all over you.


Have fun... its an experience you'll NEVER forget.
 
My girlfriend and I have discussed this very topic. I've never hada 3 some and she's been with women in her past. We dont want to do it with one of her friends because of the obvious problems it would cause. We've gone to swing clubs (Lush-SF) in san francisco, but we either just fucked eachother, we didn't feel comfortable with anyone there. It was an experience, we've gone back a couple of times I cause we like doing shit infront of people. A few times women touched and sucked her tits (which are nice) that was kinda cool. I just want the hole shabang (3some) to jump off one day.
 
Is it worth the RISK of losing this relationship???

B True
 
joack said:
My girlfriend and I have discussed this very topic. I've never hada 3 some and she's been with women in her past. We dont want to do it with one of her friends because of the obvious problems it would cause. We've gone to swing clubs (Lush-SF) in san francisco, but we either just fucked eachother, we didn't feel comfortable with anyone there. It was an experience, we've gone back a couple of times I cause we like doing shit infront of people. A few times women touched and sucked her tits (which are nice) that was kinda cool. I just want the hole shabang (3some) to jump off one day.
Click to expand...

My wife and I have never been to a lifestyle club. Where we're at there's nothing other than occassional parties -- no full or part-time clubs. Occasionally we talk about visiting a club when we're out of town -- we're a pretty sexually charged couple, we'd go more for the atmosphere, the experience, than anything else. Not to meet people, etc... I guess you'd call us more voyeuristic/exhibitionist than anything else... No guy is coming near my wife, that is for sure...

I've heard most of the people in the clubs are pretty nasty (is this true?); that would kind of harsh our vibe... so we'd try to be pretty selective if we ever were to go. Most of the time we keep ourselves pretty stimulated at home and don't need the outside help -- the occasional strip club together is fun though.
 
Thanks for all of the input, no I don't think its worth losing the relationship, but she brought it up. Its not like I'm the one pushing this. I guess we'll probably go to one of the swingers clubs around here and see what happens. I guess the worst is some people coming on to both of us which I don't think would be that bad (probably make for some good sex when we got home).

Whats the diiference in an on-premise and off-premise club?!?!

Thanks again, Idon't know how I went without EF!!:D
 
Alky -- read that link I gave you above -- it will explain a lot, especially about clubs and socials.

On-premise is where there is sex on premise, usually a full-scale club devoted to the "lifestyle" on given nights; off-premise there is no sex allowed and the participants make their own arrangements for after the party, usually held in hotels where rooms are nearby.
 
Cool Machine, there is a club here where its on the top floor of a hotel, is that off premise? I've got one friend who went with his girl and he said people all night would come up and give them a room number like, "We're in room 1504" come see us. Is that kinda what happens? I just got to work so I'll read the link sometime today. Thanks for the info!!

Can I give Karma if I'm not plat? I'd like to throw some your way for the help.
 
Well, you'd have to find the particular club that is hosting the event and find out what their rules are. Chances are it's a monthly, couples only and select females gathering that you'd need to register for. As for after the party, I suppose anything goes that all parties involved agree to. Think it through first and make sure you both want to do it; have ground rules in place and ways of communicating to one-another if you or your partner is doing something that is unacceptable to the other.

You can visit here to see if the club is listed:
http://www.nasca.com/states/nasca_clubs.html

As for karma, you can give it, but it won't "count" till you have 100 posts. Thanks for the thought though...
 
I've been reding over some of these links and some of it is a little to heavy for me, I don't think I could stand there and let guys line up to bang my girl (and I mean sex not finger like that 12 year old posted in another thread). I don't think she wants another guy, she just wants to expeirement with another chick. I guess we'll go and check out one of these bars soon. I think these peoples house parties are a little too hardcore at this time for us.
 
Heya

On premise clubs...


I dont care what anyone says.. there are some very hot women in some clubs.

Room fullls of people fucking and sucking... it just doesnt get much better than that
 
had a couple 3 somes. #1 was with the wife. same deal. she was all about it until i started screwin the other chick. this also led down a slippery slope of me cheating on my girl. that was 1.5 yrs a go and have been totally dedicated for 10 mos. Well ok 1 screwup 4 mos ago. But anyway, things are finally returning to normal around here and I love my wife more than anything. I wouldn't even dream of LOOKING at another woman. It's no where near worth losing her. i almost did twice.
 
THeMaCHinE said:


My wife and I have never been to a lifestyle club. Where we're at there's nothing other than occassional parties -- no full or part-time clubs. Occasionally we talk about visiting a club when we're out of town -- we're a pretty sexually charged couple, we'd go more for the atmosphere, the experience, than anything else. Not to meet people, etc... I guess you'd call us more voyeuristic/exhibitionist than anything else... No guy is coming near my wife, that is for sure...

I've heard most of the people in the clubs are pretty nasty (is this true?); that would kind of harsh our vibe... so we'd try to be pretty selective if we ever were to go. Most of the time we keep ourselves pretty stimulated at home and don't need the outside help -- the occasional strip club together is fun though.
Click to expand...
My girlfriend doesn't want to be with another guy, so thats cool. We get more excited talking about the shit at home than we do when we''re there because we're still a little nervous. We always start off by watching and we never become the main attraction. We're either in a little cubby (which is clean) or on the side somewhere in the room fuckin doggy style or having oral sex.

Definitely go with your woman if you get a chance. Alot of couple go just to watch. Only on one occassion I've noticed someone touching another woman without her knowing and she was offended, and just scooted over and her and her man continued fucking.

Usually the etiquette is to ask first before you touch. Sometimes you'll experience someone getting fucked or fucking and just reach their hands outward to touch the nearest person. This happened to me and I damn near nutted right then and there just over a woman's touch and grab of my hand. I know that doesnt' sound like nothing but it was kinda intense for me since I've never had contact with more than 1 woman while having sex.

One time, my girlfriend was going down on me and there was a blonde mid 30s woman just watching her suck my dick. I would look away and look at her again so she started masturbating while she watched. I was like fuckit, I waived her to come over and she did. We went into a cubby and long a behold her fuckin man comes in to (he was in bathroom shower when she was staring at us). That kinda blew it for me. I ended up fuckin my girlfried in front of them while they touched her and she was sucking my girls tits.

Whats funny now but wasn't then was that I was fucking my girl from behind for a while and looked over. This happned like slow motion, I looked at my girlfriend's arm and it was moving, then I slowly followed her arm - to her forearm then to her hand - she had a dick in her fuckin hand! It made me feel funny and she saw the look on my face and grinned and gave me some reassurance. She later told me that the woman grabbed her hand and placed it on his dick. I was like oh well. We switched positions and they watched and messed around with eachother.

We ended the session by fucking doggy style and right when I nutted I ask the woman could I release it on her ass (nice big round ass) and she let me. Even steven.
 
So we can actually go and not join in? I thought if we went and did nothing that people might be thinking we were wierd or something. The thought of fucking my girl while others watch is cool, hell its all cool except some dude doing my girl in front of me or not in front of me for that matter.
 
joack -- sounds like (mostly) a good time; did you have to register or was the club a walk-in type of club?

Hmmm... perhaps the wifey and I are going to have to take an out-of-town trip to a club soon...
 
Alkybanshee said:
So we can actually go and not join in? I thought if we went and did nothing that people might be thinking we were wierd or something. The thought of fucking my girl while others watch is cool, hell its all cool except some dude doing my girl in front of me or not in front of me for that matter.
Click to expand...
I feel you bruah. Yea, you can go in and just watch at the one that I went to. I've heard of some that require everyone to change into sexy under-garments or just a towel, but that was at the more cheesier places in S.F. (Power Exchange). If you dont wear a towel you have to pay more $. Never been to PE but heard horror stories of little single men watching others and jacking off in the corner and standing behind your woman. I wouldn't have any of that! I'd be a bit unruly up there in a minute!
On cetain nights its ok for single men to go so alot of pervs show up.

But this other place in the city is cool. It just moved to a new location, ventilation is better, more spacious, clean and best of all its a younger crowd 50% 20s-30s when we went. Definitely surf the web call around.
 
THeMaCHinE said:
joack -- sounds like (mostly) a good time; did you have to register or was the club a walk-in type of club?

Hmmm... perhaps the wifey and I are going to have to take an out-of-town trip to a club soon...
Click to expand...
Yea we called a number, they called back and talk to us about the club. We first found the club online. It cost us $80.00 the first time then 60.00 each time after that. We try to go once every couple of months but lately I've been workin a second job and we stopped going for about 3 months or so.

Yea, you and wifey will have fun. Bring your favorite drink (or drug-keep that on the low-low). Talk about it first if you're going to do anything. You probably wont the first time, then you two will talk about it all night and say that shit was crazy.

Ya'll be hooked and wanna go back and as you do, do something each time you go (oral sex, fucking doggy style is convenient and fun because you have a good view of everthing, then flirtin with others but not taking it too far, then gradually allowing touching and feeling) Thats where we are touch, feel, kissing (recently).

This one guy told his girl (20 something hottie) to kiss me. I almost tripped out. They were a young couple, both white, & didn't trip that I was black and my girlfriend is white. My girl said go ahead. So we tounged while my girl suck my dick. He later returned the favor and kissed my girl (I was cool until they didn't stop...lol...) I squeezed my girl's hand and she stopped. I was kinda turning me on tho.
 
...

Joacks experience with clubs sounds familiar.

People wont think you're wierd if you dont join in.... a lot of people expect to just be watched.... Ill tell you this... having sex with people watching is a huge turn on.

I would just avoid clubs that allow single men.
 
Re: ...

Milo Hobgoblin said:

I would just avoid clubs that allow single men.
Click to expand...

I hear that -- if we were to look at clubs, we'd probably look at clubs that only allow couples and select single females. There are quite a few that operate that way.
 
Well we went out this weekend and things got a little heated. My GF was dancing all over me while I was in a chair (like a stripper lap dance) and another girl came over and told me how beautiful she was and how lucky I was to have her. I said thanks and then the chick told me she wanted to take her home and I said well, she doesn't go anywhere without me. So now the girl says okay and my GF told her to kiss me and she started to, then I had the two girls sitting in my lap making out, IT WAS GREAT. We didn't take anyone home with us or go with anyone, but we had some unbelievable sex when we got home. The next day I asked her if she liked seeing me kiss the other girl and she said yes. I told her that I would not like her kissing another guy and she said okay she wouldn't. I can't wait till next weekend, this could get really fun!! I'll keep you guys posted....
 
THeMaCHinE said:


Hmmm... perhaps the wifey and I are going to have to take an out-of-town trip to a club soon...
Click to expand...


Machine, I would suggest not going unless you want to be following the link in your signature. It sounds good in theory but in reality it's two different things.
 
Devastation said:



Machine, I would suggest not going unless you want to be following the link in your signature. It sounds good in theory but in reality it's two different things.
Click to expand...

lol ... excellent point, I appreciate the words.

If we were to go, it wouldn't be to hook up; it'd be as flies on the wall -- don't really see us as the sharing type, maybe watch/be watched a little though. Hell, we probably won't ever get around to it. No big deal either way.
 
Oh, and trust me, been all through the site in my sig. The information there is better than gold. I would never put my marriage and family in jeaporady for a little piece of strange.
 
my view

this is my first post, so i guess im obliged to make noticeable first impression, so i thought i should post my views on this topic.

first, im english, univesity educated, and 33 years old, male.

i started experimenting with my g/f with 3-somes and swingers clubs a few years ago (about 5).

i did this because my previous EX girlfriend cheated on me, and when i was having sex with her (for the short time we were trying to "make up") i would fantasise about her screwing this other bloke and get really turned on (this is about my previous EX).

so when i was with my current g/f, and i still had these emotions, i was TERRIFIED>
i just had to find out if this would destroy me or whether it was a real part of my sexuality (ie, another man involved in my sexual contact with my loved one).

long story short (and its a hellebva long and thrillling tale), i got involved in it, and NEVER looked back.

any man, who has not experienced the IMMENSE sexual plerasure of multiple people sex, including sex with other people, INCLUDING SEX WITH YOUR PARTNER AND OTHER MALES, has never experienced the real pleasure of sex.

quite simply, with a great deal of open minded experimentation, i have come to the educated point of view, that sex should be enjoyed in a group environment, for the real thrillls.

i love my girlfriend and she loves me. we have been together for 7 years and i have NEVER been unfaithfuil, and i honestly believe she is always and always has been faithfil to me.

we go "swinging:" a coupla times a month. its totally amazing and neither of us would give it up... its just makes us closer.. we have reached a point where we can enjoy a sexual experience and know we are total;ly committed.

just one other point. we NEVER do ANYTHING sexual apart, always and ONLY in a swinging environment where we BOTH enjoy it.

thats the trust we have.

i love my girl so much.

i could NEVER be with anyone else, unless our relationship failed because of something i cant imagine now.

swinging is NOT evil, its NOT unfaithfil... its accepting we are human beings who enjoy physical pleasure.

no offence to non swingers..

you should really open your minds.. try it... but not if you dont love your partner equally and dont trust each other 10000000000000%%%%%


lecture friom the new english guy, over!!

thanks
 
Re: my view

FatStoner said:


first, im english, univesity educated, and 33 years old, male.
Click to expand...

Hmmmm, I guess that english UNIVESITY education ain't all it's cracked up to be anymore huh?
 
UPDATE:::

We went to an off-premise swingers club this past weekend. It was not quite what I expected, heres why. If I didn't know what it was (swingers club) I wouldn't have known, it was like a regular nightclub with a few exeptions.

1. Age difference. Most clubs don't have such a varity, young crowd or old crowd, ect. My GF and I are both 24, the ages in there were 21-60.

2. Girl on Girl dancing. There was quite a bit more of this than at usual clubs. Usually you have a couple of attention whores who freak on each other just so everyone will gawk, but here there were quite a few FF couples (which is cool).

3. Not a sausage fest. They don't allow single guys in so there was not the usual 5 to 1 ratio of guys to chicks. (I never really realized how off balanced it is a normal clubs until you eliminate the single guys).

4. More couples kissing freaking on each other and general making out on the dance floor than a normal club.

We did enjoy the experience and will probably go back, but now I am on the quest for an on premise club. We have already talked about it and we're definatly not into a full swap, but the idea of watching or being watched is a definate turn on.

End update::::
 
Listen my man, if you want a 3 some get 2 chicks bneither of whom you are attached to...having a 3 some with your soon to be wife is bad business...Something will happen, someone's feelings will get hurt, you'll put your dick in the wrong hole and when it's over whoo boy, let hte wierdness begin...example your wife after it's all over: did you like so and so, did you want to fuck her you rotten prick, oh yeah. If you value what you have, get freaky but keep it with her
 
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