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Define cheating.
- Thread starter gstacker
- Start date
If she's just a friend, then there's no problem aside from the lie though right?
gstacker
New member
Have u ever tried to forgive someone before?
L
lartinos
Guest
You're fucked and she has the right to be mad.
If the girl is totally in love you may take you back, otherwise no.
I would tell her that no sex took place.
If the girl is totally in love you may take you back, otherwise no.
I would tell her that no sex took place.
Yes, I was cheated on about ten years ago by a guy I was living with for two years. He went out and partied with an old friend, and one thing led to another.
He told me the next day they had slept together.
We tried to work things out after, and I forgave him, but it was not to be in the end for different reasons.
I think that if cheating happens, then it is for a reason. Somethings wrong in the relationship.
I actually regret forgiving him because it prolonged the inevitable.
gstacker
New member
Ya she's pissed matter fact well jus refer her as the x gf right now, we did try n work it out and saw each other a copule times after but the trust is gone and ya I'm a jerk... Anyways I'm going to give her space n see what happens, the next guy or two may or may not make her as happy as I did well jus have to see...
gstacker
New member
Ya i understand what ur saying... Her idea was we don't have any contact for awhile n see what happens I wasn't really down for that but she told me she loves me an she said it in a way that made alot of sense so we both agreed it was the best thing, problem was we both kept giving in and seeing each other and it seemed as if this was all bringing us closer (weired) but the trust was totally gone and we ended it a huge argument. Haven't talked to her since... 2 days now.... Hella depressed, I'm
sure it's over for good, I wish I would of jus gave her her space like we planned on
KillahBee
New member
To me, the ongoing flirting is worse than the random one night fuck. Ongoing flirting shows a CLEAR pattern of neediness above and beyond the existing relationship and thus, that's a MAJOR sign to end things. Not talking once in a while normal flirting, but a consistent pattern.
On the physical, really anything is cheating (kissing, whatever).
And no, you're gone if you cheat. It's that simple.
On the physical, really anything is cheating (kissing, whatever).
And no, you're gone if you cheat. It's that simple.
Actually, my(current) bf and I took a break for a while last year , and got back together again. We are engaged now. We never cheated on each other or anything like that (as far as I know), but we both had issues to deal with in our personal lives that were keeping us from having a great relationship.
It was hard being apart, but I tried to keep my thoughts positive and say "if it is meant to be, it'll happen". It took some time.
2 days isn't very long. Just give her space and see what happens. She'll let you know what's up when she's ready.
I'd recommend you don't sleep with anyone else if you have hopes of getting back together, you know she'll ask you about it.
gstacker
New member
Harsh but alot of truth in there...
gstacker
New member
Congrads on ur engagment! Well I deff don't want to get involved with any type of relashinship right now, that's like imposible my hearts still with her.... I'm
a man so no comment on the sex part but I will try n take care of myself for as long as possible but honestly I'm thinkin it will be at least 6montjs to a year an ya I'm a man with man needs... She's very smart n understanding an mature when it comes to that kinda shit anyways so I do t think that would be a isue....
I dont think u cheated, u lied but u didnt cheat, if I were in ur GF's case Id be pissed and may have trust issues but cant say u cheated, if u were just hanging witht he girl and nothing happened there is no cheating, if you like her there is, if u just lied because u thought she'd be mad or wouldnt understand I totally get you...
gstacker
New member
Thanks for siding but I was cheating i new it was wrong right from the start... I tried arguing it but it's not a winning battle I just have to admit it.
sardonicone
New member
Cheating is whatever my wife tells me it is, that way I stay clear of trouble.
And considering I've had transgressions in the past I was forgiven for, I'd like to believe I could do the same.
mustang_00
Well-known member
so your gf's friend told her that she saw you out with some other girl? so YOU didn't get a chance to tell your gf?? what exactly happened.
your gf asked about it and you lied i take it?
your gf asked about it and you lied i take it?
gstacker
New member
was pre meditated and i told her i was going to be home so ya im hella gukity on this one
gstacker
New member
Jimmy I am going to help you out for your next relationship... hopefully it will be useful for you.
Dont have pictures of other girls in your phone - IF you are serious about the person you are dating.... it will cause problems (which I hope you now know)
Do not talk mention how you are embarrassed to be since with any chick you are seen with by an ex AND get caught saying so.
When in a relationship that you are doing things you dont want to get caught for - delete delete delete... voice mails, texts, emails etc... trust me... leaves no evidence
When you find someone you are serious about - talk to her about how you are feeling and what you expect from her and let her tell you the same thing.
Listen to what she is telling you - Saying it simple, if the relationship or person means anything to you and you know something you and doing or did bothered them, pay attention and address it
Take it slow - You will miss a lot if you don't slow down
If you really care about the person - going out with other girls is not ok.
Doing things behind the persons back is not ok at any point in a relationship Just be open and honest if you are going out
If you are going out with other more then one person you need to let them all know... it is only fair
If you dont trust the other person or vise verse - it is not going to work so move on to the next
If it aint love - beat the pussy until something better comes along does work but at the end of the day... you are still alone.
I don't know what happened with us and I thought this last week together was going really good. I was falling more and more for you everyday. I was beginning to miss you when you were only gone for an hour. In the beginning I trusted you. As time when on - I lost some here and there but thought you were sincere in everything and thought I had nothing to lose. I tried to keep myself emotionally distant so that I wouldn't get hurt at the end. I asked you one night if you were going to hurt me and you said no. Maybe it was never your intent to - I'll never really know. But I couldn't help how I was beginning to feel about you. Those feelings are the only reason why I was willing to work things out with you so many different times. I know there is no prefect relationship... All there is you as a person choosing what you are willing to work on and with who. I didn't want to believe what I heard about you being with another chick on Saturday... But that is something I will not tolerate. I have been on this side a lot and it sucks... yet still can't find myself for once to be the cheater vs the cheated. You may not have done anything with the chick but according your post it was a date. I am not even mad anymore. I doubt I was ever what you wanted - just that place holder until something better comes along.
Anyways, nothing can be changed now cause it's all in the past. I don't understand why you tried so hard to have me back.... doesn't make sense to me.... I guess you wanted the best of both worlds? Good thing you not much of a club goer - dont have to worry about running into you.
No hard feeling though Jimmy. wish you luck in life.
Oh please dont reply. let's just end it here. I am going to send you all the pics I have from your bday for you to have k.
Bye Hun.
Dont have pictures of other girls in your phone - IF you are serious about the person you are dating.... it will cause problems (which I hope you now know)
Do not talk mention how you are embarrassed to be since with any chick you are seen with by an ex AND get caught saying so.
When in a relationship that you are doing things you dont want to get caught for - delete delete delete... voice mails, texts, emails etc... trust me... leaves no evidence
When you find someone you are serious about - talk to her about how you are feeling and what you expect from her and let her tell you the same thing.
Listen to what she is telling you - Saying it simple, if the relationship or person means anything to you and you know something you and doing or did bothered them, pay attention and address it
Take it slow - You will miss a lot if you don't slow down
If you really care about the person - going out with other girls is not ok.
Doing things behind the persons back is not ok at any point in a relationship Just be open and honest if you are going out
If you are going out with other more then one person you need to let them all know... it is only fair
If you dont trust the other person or vise verse - it is not going to work so move on to the next
If it aint love - beat the pussy until something better comes along does work but at the end of the day... you are still alone.
I don't know what happened with us and I thought this last week together was going really good. I was falling more and more for you everyday. I was beginning to miss you when you were only gone for an hour. In the beginning I trusted you. As time when on - I lost some here and there but thought you were sincere in everything and thought I had nothing to lose. I tried to keep myself emotionally distant so that I wouldn't get hurt at the end. I asked you one night if you were going to hurt me and you said no. Maybe it was never your intent to - I'll never really know. But I couldn't help how I was beginning to feel about you. Those feelings are the only reason why I was willing to work things out with you so many different times. I know there is no prefect relationship... All there is you as a person choosing what you are willing to work on and with who. I didn't want to believe what I heard about you being with another chick on Saturday... But that is something I will not tolerate. I have been on this side a lot and it sucks... yet still can't find myself for once to be the cheater vs the cheated. You may not have done anything with the chick but according your post it was a date. I am not even mad anymore. I doubt I was ever what you wanted - just that place holder until something better comes along.
Anyways, nothing can be changed now cause it's all in the past. I don't understand why you tried so hard to have me back.... doesn't make sense to me.... I guess you wanted the best of both worlds? Good thing you not much of a club goer - dont have to worry about running into you.
No hard feeling though Jimmy. wish you luck in life.
Oh please dont reply. let's just end it here. I am going to send you all the pics I have from your bday for you to have k.
Bye Hun.
mustang_00
Well-known member
yeah but did you bang this chick or just went out with her. what happened?? i want extreme detail. mainly for masturbational purposes.
gstacker
New member
lol thanks for your concern mustang An no i didnt fuk her. i fucked myself
please dont masterbate at that thought 
mustang_00
Well-known member
so if nothing happened why the f would you lie about it? is it one of those relationships were you're allowed to go out with friends just not girl friends??
I read her...email? as a chick with clear commitment issues and a hint of "poor me"
dude look...in what I'm about to say...clearly "he's cheating on [me]" but
once I saw an email to and from (no one deletes shit) between my husband and a co-ed
so...before he could deny it, I printed it
I'm a shit head so I called and asked him if he gave out his personal email as opposed to his school email out to anyone at school
"uhm, no?"
"really, no classmates? school project, nothing?"
"uhm .....no"
"nothing to victoria???"
long explanation about how he never talks to her etc
what got my panties ina bunch was that he ended the email with a cutesy little phrase he says to me in emails all the time
fessing up...I would've still been twisted, but was infuriated at the lie that he didnt email her
soyeah, I flipped...took a pic of the printed email and texted it to him...while I was on the phone with him
and proceeded to just in general be a crazy bitch
he saved it by telling the truth
shes a good lookin girl...he didnt want me to be jealous that he WAS talking to her about a school email...he was flirting in the email because no one talks to him at school
and uhm, he didnt think I'd find out and thought Id be furious if he was talking to a hot chick/assigned partner for a project
on honest reflection...he was right
hetried goin the no harm-no foul route and got bagged...and told me that lying to me wasn't the way to go cuz it made it look worse then it was
total bullshit?? IDK
but I bought it and chilled out
moral...DONT LIE YOU"LL GET CAUGHT AND LOOK GUILTY FOR LYING
ps...your girl isnt mature enuff to admit whats really bothering her...her own insecurity...provided your intention wasnt to cheat
dude look...in what I'm about to say...clearly "he's cheating on [me]" but
once I saw an email to and from (no one deletes shit) between my husband and a co-ed
so...before he could deny it, I printed it
I'm a shit head so I called and asked him if he gave out his personal email as opposed to his school email out to anyone at school
"uhm, no?"
"really, no classmates? school project, nothing?"
"uhm .....no"
"nothing to victoria???"
long explanation about how he never talks to her etc
what got my panties ina bunch was that he ended the email with a cutesy little phrase he says to me in emails all the time
fessing up...I would've still been twisted, but was infuriated at the lie that he didnt email her
soyeah, I flipped...took a pic of the printed email and texted it to him...while I was on the phone with him
and proceeded to just in general be a crazy bitch
he saved it by telling the truth
shes a good lookin girl...he didnt want me to be jealous that he WAS talking to her about a school email...he was flirting in the email because no one talks to him at school
and uhm, he didnt think I'd find out and thought Id be furious if he was talking to a hot chick/assigned partner for a project
on honest reflection...he was right
hetried goin the no harm-no foul route and got bagged...and told me that lying to me wasn't the way to go cuz it made it look worse then it was
total bullshit?? IDK
but I bought it and chilled out
moral...DONT LIE YOU"LL GET CAUGHT AND LOOK GUILTY FOR LYING
ps...your girl isnt mature enuff to admit whats really bothering her...her own insecurity...provided your intention wasnt to cheat
also...kissing the other girl counts as cheating....and my last post was too long, just read the last four lines or so
If you're gonna cheat, you have to use the same pet-names and cutsey phrases with all the chicks or else you'll never be able to keep it all straight.
So u didnt kiss the chick? I take it back about just lying, u cheated...
gstacker
New member
Is this somthing u can forgive and get past?
calveless wonder
New member
cheating is pretty much a betrayal of trust. physicality is usually the biggest indicator, but i agree lies can play a big component as well, especially if the intent is to deceive.
Cheating is horrible and of low character either way, but IMHO it's worse when it's more emotionally driven than physical. Women tend to be cheat more emotionally (and probably eventually physically) than guys who are often more physically motivated. Not excusing the behavior or limiting it to 1 sex, but emotional cheating is worse...and tends to be more common with women.
Intention is everything. If I have a girlfriend and some girl comes up to me and tries to make out with me or grab me and i wasn't on guard or willing, then that doesn't constitute cheating. So the physicality aspect alone doesn't neccessarily mean anything. same as if your girl gets her ass grabbed at a club just walking by when shes out with friends
Cheating is horrible and of low character either way, but IMHO it's worse when it's more emotionally driven than physical. Women tend to be cheat more emotionally (and probably eventually physically) than guys who are often more physically motivated. Not excusing the behavior or limiting it to 1 sex, but emotional cheating is worse...and tends to be more common with women.
Intention is everything. If I have a girlfriend and some girl comes up to me and tries to make out with me or grab me and i wasn't on guard or willing, then that doesn't constitute cheating. So the physicality aspect alone doesn't neccessarily mean anything. same as if your girl gets her ass grabbed at a club just walking by when shes out with friends
Unfortunately u wont find the answer to that question here because #1 most are amused with you and dont care and #2 we dont love you, we dont know you, we dont know how you are in real life therefore we dont know if you can be forgived, we're probably say no because we have no attachment to you, someone who does though might forgive you, but as per her email it seems she didnt so you should really move on, dont contact her for a week or two and see if she comes around.
gstacker
New member
K fair enough... Ima wait till valintines day I guess, seems like a ok day ya? Anyways I'm sure she will have some handsome guy take her out an I'll be lookin hella stupid but idk I fucked up I deserve it... I swear I'll never ever cheat again!!!
Do NOT wait til Valentine's as you said some dude's probably gonna as her out, wait until first days of Feb and then try a "Hi, Im alive, how u've been" message, if there is a place you are certain to bump in to her even better...
AztecWarrior
New member
No comment. :C
AztecWarrior
New member
Don't tease me, please me.
sardonicone
New member
It's not cheating if she doesn't wind up pregnant.
*ebony*
New member
totally agree.
as for forgiveness, i do forgive. its pointless to carry around all the hurt and resentment and anger that usually follows such an event. to my knowledge i have never been cheated on, but if it were to happen then it would be over. a book closed on that part of my life, yet that is not to say i'd rather not have diffrent, less intimate relationship with said person.
i also consider it cheating myself and the person i'm with if the relationship fizzles out and the only reason its continuing is for selfish reason. i used to be with an awesome guy who made feel so cherished, so valued and beautiful. and that was the only reason i was with him because at that moment in my life i needed so bad to feel that and i didn't want to be alone and he was always there, so dependable and solid and good to me. i couldn't stay with him like that, i couldn't live in such a selfish relationship, not when he offered so much and i was unable to give him what he wanted. i felt guilt and i felt shame. so i told him. i've never cried so much as i did that night, never felt so sad as i did that night. i couldn't continue cheating him out of a chance with someone else better.
gstacker
New member
That's a deep post, gettin a lil off topic but ya I've stayed with women for selfesh reasons too.... Pretty jacked up, nothing to feel good about.
*ebony*
New member
lol, was it off topic? sorry.
guess im just admitting to cheating. maybe the worst kind of cheating.
gstacker
New member
Na I ment I was gettin off topic...
Anyways guess this is a good time to update the situation, we kicked it a few times now and talking again, haven't actually made up and she's still mad but at least we can still laugh, talk and have sex.... But she's real quick to remind me were not together and how awful it was that I did what I did.... She makes no promises we will ever be together and she can never trust me again... This right here is either going to make us stronger or tear us apart, we need our space but kinda hard staying away from
each other, I almost want her to go have a fling or two an then come back to me... (weired hua?) anyways 3:35am I don't even know what I'm saying I'm so tired lol
Anyways guess this is a good time to update the situation, we kicked it a few times now and talking again, haven't actually made up and she's still mad but at least we can still laugh, talk and have sex.... But she's real quick to remind me were not together and how awful it was that I did what I did.... She makes no promises we will ever be together and she can never trust me again... This right here is either going to make us stronger or tear us apart, we need our space but kinda hard staying away from
each other, I almost want her to go have a fling or two an then come back to me... (weired hua?) anyways 3:35am I don't even know what I'm saying I'm so tired lol
KillahBee
New member
I'll give you one piece of advice here, for whatever it's worth - make it very clear that if she is going to "forgive" you and get back together with you, then she HAS to let it go 100%. Understand you're not in the position to make demands, but if she keeps it in the back of her head, then she's gonna use it against you every single time you fight and it'll be this little cloud hanging over both of you forever. That's no way to have a healthy relationship. So, if she can't move past it 100%, then it's probably not worth getting back together at all.
Easy. Cheating = anything you wouldn't do with another if your SO was present.
Wierd because my wife says I can get a handjob from another girl but only if she's there to watch.
Not a trick, getting a little jealous gets her off. She likes to watch me get lap dances at strip bars.
Fours years ago we were in Montreal and we were all set to go to the Grand Prix in Richelieu so she could watch me get a handie (no chance of VD with a handie).
Unfortunately, the Grand Prix had closed down and I wasn't familiar with any of the other whore houses around Montreal. So that fantasy goes unfulfilled.
if ur thinking it might be, it probably is
digimon7068
New member
very. . .i have a feeling that would wreck it for you too.
interesting....
gstacker
New member
you sound up for it lol
do i taste good??
gstacker
New member
well if it wrecked it then it would make it alot easier to move on.... im not saying for her to be with me and cheat on me too, ya that would jus fuck it all up n gross me out, but maybe jus split up for a min an let her go an if she comes back well then cool.... anyways we spent yesterday together again watgching football an really bonding.... as of now im not wantining her to go have flings lol
gstacker
New member
that would be nice!!! have some random chic jack me off while my gf watches...might be a min before i get that tho
ricco561
New member
I wouldn't know.
But I do know if you ever had me, you'd never go back to women. (no homo)
At first I was like WTF, but then I pictured it with my very vivid imagination and it went down petty well
So if when you blow dudes it's not cheating, I understand....
gstacker
New member
At first I was like WTF, but then I pictured it with my very vivid imagination and it went down petty well
I gotta double check to make sure it's cool but u ever visit California?
gstacker
New member
Damn fool u been dieting... Looking very lean right now!!!
canadianhitman
Well-known member
Here's a better idea. IF you want any chance of getting back together with this girl, you can only have sex with women she has ZERO chance of finding out about for the next three months (I say three months because after that, fuck her...that's too long a break to expect an abstinence). If you do get back with her before 3 months are up, and she looks you in the eye and asks if you've been with anyone in the interim...you tell her that crap you said earlier about how you couldn't possibly because your heart was still with her. That's right: you will need to lie, and very convincingly. Trust me on this...she will NOT be "understanding and mature" about it if you bang another girl in the near future.
(For those who will give me crap about this, remember the Ross/Rachael drama on Friends when he did a girl when they were 'on a break'.)
I can't lie to anyone I care about, especially if she looked me in the eye and asked me
gstacker
New member
Well thanks for the tips but ya, one lie turns into a snow ball of lies real quick n then I'm sitting here feeling like a jerk and really I'm a good dude...im gettin more in more confident were going to get past this everyday an I'm not going to fuk it up over some snatch... She's a nymphomania anyway can barly keep up with her as it is... Dnt know what the he'll I was thinking before...
At first I was like WTF, but then I pictured it with my very vivid imagination and it went down petty well
Thank God Nan's on this board to validate my deviance or I'd feel like a real freak.
gstacker
New member
Pfffft it jus confirms it
Lived in Downey/LA a while back (99')I gotta double check to make sure it's cool but u ever visit California?
Well I'm a hugy sicko so Im not sure if you want to be associated to my perversions
Well I'm a hugy sicko so Im not sure if you want to be associated to my perversions
Ya got nothing on me, darlin!
AztecWarrior
New member
Cool shit. I live close to that city.
AztecWarrior
New member
Bullshit. SO everyone here supposed to be angels now? Everyone has done something in somekind of shape or form. You can cheat in your mind way before every acting on it physically.
gstacker
New member
Ya I believe everyone in this threads cheated before... Deff nothing to brag bout so I don't blame anyone for not comming clean, but ya... Cheating sucks no matter what side ur on... Jus like that married chic that was on my nuts not long ago... Now that was some seriously scanless cheating shit right there, she should jus get a divorce n then go kick it, I'm glad I didn't go there with her.
"Ohhhh look at me, Ive got married chicks on my nutz"
Never cheated....
//
gstacker
New member
That what it sounded like? Wasn't trying to sound like that at all... Jus scanless, that's like ultimate cheating right there, if there is such thing
You haven't even been married a year yet.
It's not like my number of extra-marital partners is in the triple digits.
yet
Yet
atta girl
well you never know
Last edited:
Funny stuffgstacker said:
Brad.
AztecWarrior
New member
Now ain't that the truth.
AztecWarrior
New member
AztecWarrior
New member
See that's why I don't go judging people cause you can be the one to mess up. People say no but you really don't know if you won't. It's human nature. We all fuck up sometimes.
ricco561
New member
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