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How To Make Your Relationships Succeed...Or Fail!

blueta2

blueta2

New member
I truly don't know many people who are happy in their relationships. Lots of people I know are divorced, cheating or really unhappy.

I had this in my bookmarks and it got me thinking.....Long to read, but if you have time, quite the read!

How To Make Your Relationships Succeed...Or Fail!

My new relationship has many good moments, but we both struggle with trying to make it work well.

What are your tips for a good relationship? Besides anal ;-)
Does your r/s struggle or are u truly happy?

Discuss
 
i love my marriage.

there are hard times, but you learn to grow closer through rough times

communication creates 99.9 percent of relationship issues, so learn to communicate
 
ER, that's all you got? Come on, there has to be more!

I'm a great communicator, the other persons, well not so much. You cannot make someone else communicate
 
blueta2 said:
I truly don't know many people who are happy in their relationships. Lots of people I know are divorced, cheating or really unhappy.

I had this in my bookmarks and it got me thinking.....Long to read, but if you have time, quite the read!

How To Make Your Relationships Succeed...Or Fail!

My new relationship has many good moments, but we both struggle with trying to make it work well.

What are your tips for a good relationship? Besides anal ;-)
Does your r/s struggle or are u truly happy?

Discuss
Click to expand...
ana...wait...you covered that

Each person is slightly different. My SO and I have our good days and our bad days. Who knows what's going to happen long term? Nothing is forever, so we're taking it one day at a time. :)
 
why do people feel the need to coexist to get through life? im happier when they are at arms length...friends with benny's is where its at
 
EnderJE said:
ana...wait...you covered that

Each person is slightly different. My SO and I have our good days and our bad days. Who knows what's going to happen long term? Nothing is forever, so we're taking it one day at a time. :)
Click to expand...

Spoken like a true long term married man ;-)
 
blueta2 said:
Spoken like a true long term married man ;-)
Click to expand...
The interesting time is when the kids leave. At that point, we'll re-evaluate what each other wants and decide from there.

Who knows? I might be in Montreal looking for naked women to spend time with. :)
 
blueta2 said:
ER, that's all you got? Come on, there has to be more!

I'm a great communicator, the other persons, well not so much. You cannot make someone else communicate
Click to expand...

my point exactly, you can communicate but your shithead bf can't


so communication is the problem

fuck i'm drunk
 
i am bro, wife is driving me fucking nutz so i'm drinking, hahah
 
i have someone hired to make those got damn things in the morning. plus i plan to pass out less than an hour
 
secret to relationships? remember the good, stop maximizing the bad, be realistic and remember no one is 100% happy 100% of the time, compromise and pick your battles.
 
Ok so I'm obviously no expert but....


Mutual respect is huge to me. And listening to the other person's needs. I think a lot of times we are not actually hearing what is being said, just waiting for the other person to shut up so we can talk.
 
just...v said:
Ok so I'm obviously no expert but....


Mutual respect is huge to me. And listening to the other person's needs. I think a lot of times we are not actually hearing what is being said, just waiting for the other person to shut up so we can talk.
Click to expand...

it's a partnership and respect is a big deal...plus, complementary theories about...

1) money,

2) kids,

3) religion (or lack thereof)...










































4) everything else.
 
The ex was always on my ass about not being pretentious enough for her snooty friends...Why do you write software as opposed to practicing law...it was more prestigious for her...
 
Mel and I understand one another but maybe that was worse... we would send songs back and forth...





Apparently I'm a terrible mate when it comes to emotion.
 
I know what not to do in a relationship.

dont stop communicating
everyday make your partner fall in love with you again
dont stop caring for yourself and your appearance,it affects your attitude and if you dont love you I wont either.
never use sex are a reward or bargaining tool, this breeds resentment and then your partner wouldnt fuck you with a stolen dick and pick3 pushing

fuck I could do this all day, and its funny that in theory I know the right shit to do but at the end of the day I cant get my shit together.
 
javaguru said:
The ex was always on my ass about not being pretentious enough for her snooty friends...Why do you write software as opposed to practicing law...it was more prestigious for her...
Click to expand...

so beating her was probably your first option then?
 
theoak01 said:
I know what not to do in a relationship.

dont stop communicating
everyday make your partner fall in love with you again
dont stop caring for yourself and your appearance,it affects your attitude and if you dont love you I wont either.
never use sex are a reward or bargaining tool, this breeds resentment and then your partner wouldnt fuck you with a stolen dick and pick3 pushing

fuck I could do this all day, and its funny that in theory I know the right shit to do but at the end of the day I cant get my shit together.
Click to expand...
We all know what should be done bro, but we rarely do it...
 
I'm guessing relationship advice from anyone other than digi or plunkey probably =fail
 
ceo said:
extremely low expectations. That way you're very rarely if ever disappointed.
Click to expand...

I think this is safe way to live life, not just r/s.
But it's a cold way to be also. I expect certain things, as should my partner.

Now if Digi and Puke are the only two who are "happily married" here, that proves again, not many r/s work well.

My parents have been happily married for 55 yrs. My Mom says "It's how much one can tolerate cause I've wanted to set your Dad on fire many times"
 
blueta2 said:
I think this is safe way to live life, not just r/s.
But it's a cold way to be also. I expect certain things, as should my partner.

Now if Digi and Puke are the only two who are "happily married" here, that proves again, not many r/s work well.

My parents have been happily married for 55 yrs. My Mom says "It's how much one can tolerate cause I've wanted to set your Dad on fire many times"
Click to expand...

Plunkey does not count. He did a catch and release when he saw that someone was going to get set on fire. Smart thing to do.

I am sure CEO is happy. He is married to an Asian and they tend to please. AMIRIGHT??

Digi is the stud. Couple of fine talented girls, wife that still gets his old peen hard, and loves his young son even though he is going to grow up and be a figure skater.
 
blueta2 said:
I think this is safe way to live life, not just r/s.
But it's a cold way to be also. I expect certain things, as should my partner.

Now if Digi and Puke are the only two who are "happily married" here, that proves again, not many r/s work well.

My parents have been happily married for 55 yrs. My Mom says "It's how much one can tolerate cause I've wanted to set your Dad on fire many times"
Click to expand...


Bitch, I'm quite happily married.
 
Happily married 17 years.

A healthy sex life is key; and often underrated because this country has puritanical roots and we're brought up to believe sex is bad.

That and communication.
 
EarthRider said:
i love my marriage.

there are hard times, but you learn to grow closer through rough times

communication creates 99.9 percent of relationship issues, so learn to communicate
Click to expand...

Our marriage lives off of 4 simple words...love, honesty, trust, and communication. The promise ring I gave my wife 9 years ago has 4 diamonds...that is what their meanings are, still going strong...and the sex is too :D

Sent from my DROID BIONIC using EliteFitness
 
muscleaddiction said:
Our marriage lives off of 4 simple words...love, honesty, trust, and communication. The promise ring I gave my wife 9 years ago has 4 diamonds...that is what their meanings are, still going strong...and the sex is too :D

Sent from my DROID BIONIC using EliteFitness
Click to expand...

that is so sweet! Men like you are rare
 
muscleaddiction said:
Our marriage lives off of 4 simple words...love, honesty, trust, and communication. The promise ring I gave my wife 9 years ago has 4 diamonds...that is what their meanings are, still going strong...and the sex is too :D

Sent from my DROID BIONIC using EliteFitness
Click to expand...

Fuck that noise
 
javaguru said:
The ex was always on my ass about not being pretentious enough for her snooty friends...Why do you write software as opposed to practicing law...it was more prestigious for her...
Click to expand...

The downside of being better than everyone else, is that people tend to assume you're pretentious.
 
ceo said:
The downside of being better than everyone else, is that people tend to assume you're pretentious.
Click to expand...

lolol..I'm from a blue collar background, first one to attend college, and I'm self-educated in my career. The ex has an educational pedigree, a mother with two masters, one being a JD, and her professor father ran a liberal think tank....two different worlds.
 
javaguru said:
lolol..I'm from a blue collar background, first one to attend college, and I'm self-educated in my career. The ex has an educational pedigree, a mother with two masters, one being a JD, and her professor father ran a liberal think tank....two different worlds.
Click to expand...

I heard you have your masters in choking out sleeping women
 
the.gladiator1987 said:
fuck everyone that is happy in their relationships, fuck you, i get stuck with teh gayest girls, attitude, breaking ps3's, cutting themselves, eat like shit, no morals, in debt, horrible credit, this is horrible why am i saying all of this i mean to say I love her and were completely happy
Click to expand...

Damn bro...stop finding girls in bars or clubs, I agree that I would not want to date in this day and age, I'm fortunate to have found my soulmate, you will find yours...

Sent from my DROID BIONIC using EliteFitness
 
the.gladiator1987 said:
fuck everyone that is happy in their relationships, fuck you, i get stuck with teh gayest girls, attitude, breaking ps3's, cutting themselves, eat like shit, no morals, in debt, horrible credit, this is horrible why am i saying all of this i mean to say I love her and were completely happy
Click to expand...


Your girl is some sort of emo cutter?

I am dead serious on this - you need to lump that bitch up.
 
It was a good read blue though I don't know how much I like the idea of training a man to appreciate and value me. All they simply have to do is love. I think they forget that sometimes, but who wants to remind your man to love you and value you as much as he does himself? I think women are reactionary; we respond and we react. When we receive love we react with love like flowers leaning toward the sun and blossoming. I'm not interested in taking a leadership role anymore, that sucks. Probably why things always fall apart for me. Lol.

I liked the suggestion of the reading material at the end of the list, especially the book by Scott Peck.
 
Last edited:
I know what you mean about a leadership role. The thing is some women want the man to lead, but when the man doesn't lead exactly the way she wants, she gets bitchy. Finding the right partner is a long experience. I think it's possible to find someone that's either laid back enough to go with the flow of my style, or someone that I really click with--either way I'm not going to try to be someone I'm not. At the same time I have room to grow just like everyone.
 
I'm young and I'm obviously not in a long term committed relationship right now, but I have noticed people's communication problems usually aren't due to a lack of communication. In my experience, they happen because the two people involved don't communicate the same way.

You might think you're doing it well, but if that's not how the other person likes to communicate, they won't agree. All humans communicate. I would think its more important to learn to understand how your partner communicates than to be lazy and assume they aren't or try to retrain them to communicate like you want them to.
 
AFeedz said:
I'm young and I'm obviously not in a long term committed relationship right now, but I have noticed people's communication problems usually aren't due to a lack of communication. In my experience, they happen because the two people involved don't communicate the same way.

You might think you're doing it well, but if that's not how the other person likes to communicate, they won't agree. All humans communicate. I would think its more important to learn to understand how your partner communicates than to be lazy and assume they aren't or try to retrain them to communicate like you want them to.
Click to expand...

what do you mean "different ways of communicating"? my wife hates me lately and I admit I'm a terrible communicator.

school me with your smarts
 
AFeedz said:
I'm young and I'm obviously not in a long term committed relationship right now, but I have noticed people's communication problems usually aren't due to a lack of communication. In my experience, they happen because the two people involved don't communicate the same way.

You might think you're doing it well, but if that's not how the other person likes to communicate, they won't agree. All humans communicate. I would think its more important to learn to understand how your partner communicates than to be lazy and assume they aren't or try to retrain them to communicate like you want them to.
Click to expand...

How old are you?
 
AFeedz said:
I'm young and I'm obviously not in a long term committed relationship right now, but I have noticed people's communication problems usually aren't due to a lack of communication. In my experience, they happen because the two people involved don't communicate the same way.

You might think you're doing it well, but if that's not how the other person likes to communicate, they won't agree. All humans communicate. I would think its more important to learn to understand how your partner communicates than to be lazy and assume they aren't or try to retrain them to communicate like you want them to.
Click to expand...

I'm sorry, I didn't catch any of that. What were you saying?
 
AFeedz said:
I'm young and I'm obviously not in a long term committed relationship right now, but I have noticed people's communication problems usually aren't due to a lack of communication. In my experience, they happen because the two people involved don't communicate the same way.

You might think you're doing it well, but if that's not how the other person likes to communicate, they won't agree. All humans communicate. I would think its more important to learn to understand how your partner communicates than to be lazy and assume they aren't or try to retrain them to communicate like you want them to.
Click to expand...

It's true that men and women communicate in different ways. But the comminication I think most are talking about here is honest, open, direct communication.

Most people are afraid to bring up touchy or delicate subjects so they dance around them, temper what they say, and give subtle signals (which each sex does differently). When that doesn't work they get frustrated and blurt out their complaints in anger. Or wait until there is a fight and bring up all their complaints then.

It's best to be able to discuss things calmly before they blow up. That's what the buzzword "communication" means to me in a relationship context.
 
nydj66 said:
It's true that men and women communicate in different ways. But the comminication I think most are talking about here is honest, open, direct communication.

Most people are afraid to bring up touchy or delicate subjects so they dance around them, temper what they say, and give subtle signals (which each sex does differently). When that doesn't work they get frustrated and blurt out their complaints in anger. Or wait until there is a fight and bring up all their complaints then.

It's best to be able to discuss things calmly before they blow up. That's what the buzzword "communication" means to me in a relationship context.
Click to expand...

I guess, but that type of communication doesn't always work for me. Even calmly, having a conversation about every single thing stresses me out more than the problem itself.

That's not to say I don't discuss my feelings when I'm hurt or something because I do. But there's still more than one way to have open, honest communication.

If I have a problem I will tell you once, clearly and quickly. That's very different than needing to discuss at length every problem and concern all the time, but they're both open and honest communication...correct? But theyre different and neither one makes someone a better communicator than the other.
 
AFeedz said:
I guess, but that type of communication doesn't always work for me. Even calmly, having a conversation about every single thing stresses me out more than the problem itself.

That's not to say I don't discuss my feelings when I'm hurt or something because I do. But there's still more than one way to have open, honest communication.

If I have a problem I will tell you once, clearly and quickly. That's very different than needing to discuss at length every problem and concern all the time, but they're both open and honest communication...correct? And neither one makes someone a better communicator than the other.
Click to expand...

I'm on ignore :(
 
ladies, can we please keep the posts to a sentence, like

"that bitch pissed me off so i choked her in her sleep"

k thanks
 
muscleaddiction said:
Damn bro...stop finding girls in bars or clubs, I agree that I would not want to date in this day and age, I'm fortunate to have found my soulmate, you will find yours...

Sent from my DROID BIONIC using EliteFitness
Click to expand...

that is a combination of girlfiends, i forgot to mention butt pads to make your butt look bigger, 50 dollar lip gloss, and cheating on me every time

actually this bish just texted me i met her a while ago, might hit it, really thinking about it, the thing that sucks is that I feel stuck in my relationship because of my kids, and child support
 
I will freely admit to holding onto everyfuckinthing in the the entire history of the relationship that has ever pissed me off and dumping them all out at once like every three months or so in a small but loud and long tirade

I feel it keeps things open...so he knows I'm keeping score
 
just...v said:
What?! You're kidding me. That must have been chocolate truffle flavored pussy for him to go there twice.

Fuck Glad.
Click to expand...

pretty sure his dick doesn't have taste buds.
 
Glad if you are giving her child support WTF is she collecting shit from the government for the kidos? threaten to rat her out to get a child support reduction xD

just...v said:
What?! You're kidding me. That must have been chocolate truffle flavored pussy for him to go there twice.

Fuck Glad.
Click to expand...
where else is he gonna get a chick that he can slap the glasses off of?
 
the.gladiator1987 said:
fuck, she was on BC and it didnt work damnit, but yea V two babies, Im just an alphamale whos potent as fuck :evil:
Click to expand...

You know I love you, baby. But that bitch was not taking the BC right.

The first time it's an accident, the second time is intentional.


So you with her still?
 
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