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Motivation/HIV/Forced Workouts

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Author	Topic: Motivation/HIV/Forced Workouts
crnetxia Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 11)	posted January 24, 2000 10:47 PM I have a few things to talk about. 1. Lack of movtivation to be a HUNK. 2. The need to workout due to HIV/AIDS 3. The need to be lean due to a family history of heart attacks. 3. Alternative lifestyles resulting in being a HUNK. I have always dreamed of being 4% body fat and 200# and extremly flexable ie.( able to do the split painlessly). Since I have HIV, work 60 hours per week, and come from a family that does not exercise, it is extremly hard for me to ever fullfil my dream. I have many pictures of muscular guys of ALL KINDS in my home. I was hoping that seeing those pictures would focus my energies to start and commit myself to being a HUNK. It has not happened. The pictures did not motivate me to exercise. The pictures only motivated me for something else. Having HIV almost demands me to do something ASAP if I intend to stay alive. Depression/considering hurting myself and being alone due to many guys rejecting me due to size (ie.36 waist, flat chest, small arms) , terminates all thoughts of me being a HUNK. I exerise when my pants will not fit or I can't bend over, or my chest hurts like a heart attack. By that time, I am almost always back in my doctor's office and missing work. Doctors have told all the men in my family to exercise but we never did. I come from a family of HARD workers but not SMART workers. I have modified my diet. I eat a low fat and a low suger diet. I am the oldest male now in my family. ALL the men have died at a young age due to heart problems and high blood pressure. I guess I am NEXT to die that same way. I looked into asking gay men to give me FORCED WORKOUTS. I placed ads all over the internet. Nothing ever happened. No one cares what I do with my life. I was hoping to find some kind of str8 military camps that would train me to make me a HUNK. Never found anything. I am very lonely in need of love and would want some guy to help me. Does anyone have some advice for me? What is anavar. My docotr will not give me deca or roids. How can I get them? Also even when working so hard 60 houres per week I still have to file banructpcty Thanks for the positive input but I guess the feeling of being without a man and in COLD IOWA where there are NO men that like me makes it very hard for me. My doctor and scrink would NEVER give me anavar or deca. I already asked. THey said NO. I guess my need for a MAN right now is a loop 22. I can't get angry at anything. If I have extreme emotions I get SHINGLES. I Must stay calm. But I Can't SLOW DOwn either or I get VERY VERY VERY ill. You people have so much inner energy and self movitation. I wish I did also. I am taking medication for Depression. EFEXSOR. [email protected] ------------------ Jose Martinez [This message has been edited by crnetxia (edited January 25, 2000).] IP: Logged
George Spellwin Administrator (Total posts: 82)	posted January 24, 2000 10:51 PM With all respect, it sounds like you have lost your will to fight. I would strongly advise you to try therapy and an SSRI. Also, personal training is a good way to make sure you get to the gym. ------------------ Yours in sport, George George Spellwin Research Director Elite Fitness: Online Bodybuilding Magazine: http://www.elitefitness.com The Most Controversial Bodybuilding Site on the Internet. 217 West 18th Street, P.O. Box 1264, New York, NY 10113-1264 George Spellwin [email protected] Research Director Phone: 212-823-1000 Fax: 212-208-2531 IP: Logged
300 kleen Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 156)	posted January 24, 2000 10:53 PM The best advice I could give you is to get yourself informed as much as possible. Do a lot of research because that's the only way you will find the answers that your looking for to reach your goals. 300 ------------------ www.angelfire.com/pokemon/gear IP: Logged
BIZ Moderator (Total posts: 273)	posted January 24, 2000 10:54 PM DAMN BRO WHAT THE HELL?????? I FEEL LIKE SHIT AFTER READING THIS............. BRO ALWAYS KNOW YOU HAVE A HOME HERE BRO AND I MEAN THIS FROM INSIDE...I AM A STRAIGHT MARRIED MALE WITH MANY GAY FRIENDS THAT I AM REAL KOOL WITH ,AND THAT SHARE SOME OF YOUR JOURNEYS BRO...ANYTIME YOU HAVE A QUESTION ALL HERE WILL HAVE THE RESPECT TO TREAT YOU AS ONE OF US CAUSE YOU ARE AND WILL BE WILLING TO HELP YOU BRO WITH YOUR QUESTIONS! TAKE CARE OF THAT DIET AND ALWAYS KNOW THE ELITEFITNESS FAM CARES BRO THIS IS YOUR HOME BRO......... WITH MUCH RESPECT, BIZ! ------------------ GET BIG BRO'S! IP: Logged
CRYPTONITE Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 171)	posted January 24, 2000 11:16 PM CANNOT SAY MUCH EXCEPT RIGHT ON!! AND GET YOUR HEAD UP, IT'S THE ONLY WAY IN ORDER TO MAKE IT! ------------------ CRYPTONITE IP: Logged
Big Tex Levi Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 71)	posted January 24, 2000 11:16 PM Guy this is going to sound bad but you need to get rid of the i feel sorry attitude and change. You do have probs bro but you have to get MEAN!!! to live...Go after life and enjoy what you do have no matter what!!! My wife has a friend that is hiv pos and was going down bad, he got a script for anavar and some moral support and he looks really good again and has aquired a new zest for life...dont give in!!! IP: Logged
E2 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 867)	posted January 25, 2000 12:22 AM Get some anavar and some deca for sure it'll make you feel better, will help with the aids too take 400mg deca/week and 25mg anavar a day E2 IP: Logged
The Ranger Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 255)	posted January 25, 2000 10:04 AM Hey Bro, I agree with Big Tex Levi...You gotta get mean...I mean mad dog fuck'in mean!!! That don't mean go out and hurt someone. Channel all that inner pain to aggression in the gym. Being a HUNK....HELL man just be yourself. Where I work out, I'd much rather train with smaller guys. It's not a complex thing, it's they're more sincere in their workouts, not standing in front of the mirror thinking HOW GREAT I AM!! Discpline...The most under used word in the dictionary. It's not a once in a while thing...It's an everyday thing. Don't see your goals as out of reach...make them a reality. Feel bad...Hell go for a walk. World got you down...Go to the gym. You'll find most will accept you for who you are. When results start to show you'll feel better about yourself. Pretty soon you'll realize being a HUNK is just a picture on the wall after all. That's the illusion my man. Motivation starts in the heart...discpline in the mind......don't ever let anyone tell you...you CAN'T!!!!! Peace Bro, The Ranger IP: Logged
crnetxia Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 11)	posted January 26, 2000 12:01 AM thank you for your replies everyone I guess I have given up I taking EFFEXOR XR 75mg to not get too depressed and try take my life and hurt my fat body. I feel they only way I can do anything is with a gay roomate that would "KICK MY ASS" to get big. thanks a lot for your input It is too cold outside with too much snow. OK..that is an excuse. I just don't see my dreams coming true. No self esteem I guess. ------------------ Jose Martinez IP: Logged
Apoptosis Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 2)	posted January 26, 2000 01:27 AM Hey bro, I'm sorry to hear about your problems, that really sucks, but ou can't let yourself be depressed, and you can't look to other people to make you work out. Right now your have the chance to greatly improve the quality of your life to come. Do a little research. Check out http://www.medibolics.com --This site is about AIDS research, and the use of ergogens to combat muscle degeneration. Look at www.brinkzone.com --there is an article there about the supplementation to combat HIV. If your doctor isn't willing to help you with steroids, then find one that will. Don't wait on somebody to kick your ass into working out, only you can make your make your life better. The future looks good as far as treating AIDS, its just up to you to take care of yourself until a cure is found. If I can help in anyway drop me an email. IP: Logged
WCP Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 162)	posted January 26, 2000 01:55 AM Wow, thats hardcore dude. I have to agree with the rest of the guys. Keep this in mind dude, life aint no dress rehearsal. Putting pics of big dudes on your wall wont do anything but get you down because you dont look like that. Motivation is a simple as this...how bad do you want it? You want it? Get after it, like the bros said..get mean, like a machine man, unstoppable. Theres alot of bad four letter words out there, but the one I hate the worst is "quit". Dont worry about being a "hunk" thats completely superficial and wont help you in the least, instead focus on what you can do now, and now you can live, live healthy, strong, and wise, cause Ill tell you this man, I think that type of courage would be admired by anyone in this forum hands down. Until you can get a doctor to provide you with what it is you need, I suggest going on some glutamine. Its being used on HIV patients in hospitals and in most case studies have shown a 67% increase in muscle growth as opposed to degredation. Its available over the counter at any health or fitness store. Good Luck Bro, my prayers are with you....Godspeed IP: Logged
crnetxia Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 11)	posted January 26, 2000 07:27 AM Thank you guys I guess I lost the will to live Only pills are long hours at work are keeping me alive. I look for guys to motivate me since I am VERY GAY. Yet no guys come around to help me. AS for my doctors, I am limited by my HMO as to where I get medical care. If the doctors don't want to give it to me then I am screwed. I don't have much choice. I see all the other gay guys having fun but they are all MASSIVE HUNKS. Ii guess I will follwo inmy DAD's footsteps and die a FAT ASS. ------------------ Jose Martinez IP: Logged
cuerpudo Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 18)	posted January 26, 2000 07:46 AM I will tell you a brief history. Once when i was in a university, some guy came to the class a began to talk his history, he was a good guy but one night he knew a beautifull women and he did what erery guy had done, but without protection. Then he get aids. His life was horrible with a lot of depression, he almost kill himself, but a girl save her, she took him to a chuch, and talked to him about god and feith, and he is one nowday one of the 5000 person that could cure his aids because of faith, and this is true, in all the world this was the only true cure to the aids, and curiosly, noone other religions that Believe in Jesus and in his father could do the same. I tell you this because i know one guy that also get the cure because of faith, man faith can do thing that we never seen, it all depends of you. I always read a technical research papers about aids and all the people and doctors are very interesting in the aplication of Decadurabolin like a posibble "cure" of aids, it doesnt cure but it make syndrome to act very very slow. If you need anything you are in the right discusion forum. Have a lot of hope.... ------------------ Hi, i would like to share my experience and knowledge with you, and, of course, learn from your experience and knowledge of bodybuilding, make contacts and friends. IP: Logged
DoctorSavage Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 48)	posted January 26, 2000 09:43 AM Guy; No one can motivate you. That is something like stress and is supplied internally. You have to be willing, otherwise, it's like pushing string. If your HMO won't give you a refferral to ANY other doctors, get a lawyer to sue them. Everybody else does. If you get a few million off your HMO, I bet you will find someone to warm you up (just kidding). Anavar or Deca-Durabolin are great steroids for combating wasting associated with AIDS, but it doesn't sound like you are that far gone yet. Until then, don't mess around with steroids. Hormonal therapy of any kind can make your mood even more unstable and you already sound depressed. If you still feel you need some external motivation, try an exercise class or a martial arts class. When you are in a group, its harder to slack off, and you might meet someone you like. As to meeting someone, I have some unasked for advice. In any kind of relationship, you have to provide something of value. I hear all the time (usually from Women) "All the guys I meet are jerks". I usually tell them that I find that hard to belive, but if they pursue the matter I ask them "If you met the perfect guy, great personality, spiritually grounded, good job, good looks, what makes you think he would think you are good enough for him?" It's brutal but true, we usually end up with what we deserve. If you want to hook up with a better person, be a better person. My .02 ------------------ Dr. Savage, PhD. (I am not a bodybuilder, amature or otherwise) IP: Logged
cymric_knight Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 10)	posted January 26, 2000 01:16 PM I sounds like you really need to get your head together first. Get it together upstairs and the rest will follow. Gay OR streight, we all have problems. Don't misplace your faith in others, place it in yourself! Instead if having pics of other guys as modivation, get a pic of yourself. Kind of a 'before' and 'after'. That way you know how YOU are doing. Have some way of measuring your progress. It doesn't happen overnight. Don't look at it as if you're competing with the pro bodybuilders. Your compitition is yourself. It's placing an extra 5 lbs. on the bar or that extra rep! When I practice archery, I try for that extra bulleye. I don't care what everyone does, I want to know what I can do. Lifting weights is not a team sport. ------------------ IP: Logged
crnetxia Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 11)	posted January 26, 2000 09:34 PM The picture about myself sounds like a good idea. I will get a camera this weekend. As for GOd and religion..... Been there DOne that.. I use to preach the Gospel years ago on the streets of San Antonio and Dallas. I don't do that stuff anymore.I felt CONDEMNING, JUDGEMENTAL and HYPOCRTITIC. I just want to be happy with who I am. I don't like what I look like. I went to get a super short hair cut. Almost told the barber to cut it all off. As for sueing the HMO...... I don't think I could win and most likely I would get "LOCKED UP" for even trying that shit. I am at the mercy of the HMO plan. My old Doctor in Houston did give me LEGAL ROIDS I mean ALL THE SHIT! I got layed off and moved to IOWA and got screwed the BAD WAY! oh yea, WOuld like to find some man to warm me up! he he he he.. It will never happen. As far is getting "SELF MOVITATED" like "STRESS"... I don't see it happening. I guess my depression and being so alone in IOWA away from all my family and having no freinds and family locally to turn to makes exerciising almost impossible YET I dream of being a HUNK! I sure wish some of you guys could help me along. ------------------ Jose Martinez IP: Logged
BigPapaPump Moderator (Total posts: 101)	posted January 26, 2000 09:57 PM Call me cold hearted but...get a life ! You've spent alot of time making up an excuse for every suggestion that's been thrown to you. You either don't have enough personal fortitude to change your life or you're getting a real big kick out of reading these replies. I would suppose that at one point in your life you had enough courage to admit that you were gay, right ? Don't you think it would take less effort to get up off the couch and make an improvement ? If you want to lay around and feel sorry for yourself...you probably will die a lonely out of shape person. Instead of sitting around looking at the pictures on the wall....get up and work out. No one can make you do anything. Someone out there said "you're born small and weak and you die small and weak, how you live in between is up to you". Steroids are not the answer to your problems, if you don't atleast do something physical, you're done. I'm sure that someone involved in your lifestyle can get you your drugs...but they can't workout for you. ------------------ If the bar ain't bending, you're not lifting enough ! BPP IP: Logged
crnetxia Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 11)	posted January 26, 2000 10:22 PM I am not using roids at all. I just to have what it takes to make it. Thanks for you response. Have a nice day SIR. Jose IP: Logged
crnetxia Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 11)	posted January 26, 2000 10:22 PM I am not using roids at all. I just to have what it takes to make it. Thanks for you response. Have a nice day SIR. Jose ------------------ Jose Martinez IP: Logged
George Spellwin Administrator (Total posts: 82)	posted January 27, 2000 10:40 AM Moved to the HIV forum. ------------------ Yours in sport, George George Spellwin Research Director Elite Fitness: Online Bodybuilding Magazine: http://www.elitefitness.com The Most Controversial Bodybuilding Site on the Internet. 217 West 18th Street, P.O. Box 1264, New York, NY 10113-1264 George Spellwin [email protected] Research Director Phone: 212-823-1000 Fax: 212-208-2531 IP: Logged

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