That's bullshit bro. Some people have it worse, and some have it better. Do either of those things change YOUR situation? NO. So who gives a fuck

I'm not exactly having the best life right now either, but I'm doing what needs to be done to fix it. Just don't let yourself get caught in a loop of misery bro. Do what it takes to get out.

Get busy living,
or get busy dying.

quote:

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Originally posted by Frackal:
Some people have it worse, and some have it better. Do either of those things change YOUR situation? NO. So who gives a fuck

Get busy living,
or get busy dying.

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I agree w/ ya there Frackal. Did you get that quote from Shawshank Redemption?

I'm sorry if it came across like a dick - didn't mean it that way - but if it helps you to be pissed at me, go for it dude.

Some things I always think of from when I was in there, there was one dude that was in there my age - he had been a pro snowboarder and got kicked off the tour b/c he freaked out and trashed his room 3 days in a row. He then went home and od'd one some shit... fuck what was it.. I want to say perkeset... it was the shit I had when my wisdom teeth were taken out - anyway, it should calm you down, but he went nuts and trashed his house, broke all the shit in it - every lamp, punched threw the walls... this guy was intense. They brought him to the hospital, checked him in and locked him in a room - he punched through the wall and broke the lock on the door, then threw the metal chair through the window (it was safety glass so he couldn't cut his wrists and ther was wire mesh so he couldn't jump). finally they came in a sedated him and strapped him down. that was when I came in and they put my in that room. the door lock was busted and this girl came in that looked like she had down syndrome and without whatever medication she needed she turned into a nympho.. I didn't know that and was trying to be civil to her - until she put her hand down my pants - I told the staff that she kind of weirded me out with that and they locked her in a room and sedated her - I still remember her screaming and crying - I felt like shit after that. later they put my in a room with an old man that I couldn't understand a word he said, but he was nice -he was an alcoholic and had chronic pain... whatever that is - he shook all the time an dmumbled. when he slept he'd choke and it would set off and alarm and the nurses would come in and wake him up. I woke up one morning and he was gone, I thought his wife had finally come to pick him up, but when I went in to take a shower he was ther - he had hung himself with a shoestring in the shower (there was a metal vent grate thing above it). There was an older woman who had dementia and would constantly see "fire" and run around screaming we were all gonna die.
The scariest part is that we were in the low level ward and low security, the hardcore shit was on the floor above us, that was where the serial killer would be brought in initially if they had any injuries.

good luck with your shit man - again, I wasn't trying to be a dick.. I guess it just comes easily to me and I don't realize it

if you need to talk ever, I've been thoguh some rough shit and lots of conseling and am there dude.

I was lucky, I got's the smarts and went to one fo the top school in the country (at the time it was the top school, now it isn't... I like to think that was my fault) and I learned a lot there and went on to get a good job and stuff, so my life is coming together now. but it took me years of crap - and it wasn't until 3 years ago that I didn't think everyday about ending it all.

If people won't listen to your story, or if they listen and don't care... well, those might not be the people you want to be around. or it could be they are just lucky and can't understand it.
I've lived in a bnuch of different places and one thing that I've seen is that humans are fuckers - it used to really bother me, but not so much any more, I've just stopped expecting so much from anyone.
that sounds really jaded, but it is how I get by, and I'm happy now. I do what I want and I live.

you said something about your family not being with you for the holidays, and you say god has forsaken you, and you mention your high iq - 1) you are one of the few people I've ever "talked" with that has a high IQ and belives in god - I'm NOT trying to start a religious discussion here - but I would recommend that you take that high IQ and read some political science and religion books (not the bible - that's a story, but books on and discussion religions) and I think you will see some interesting things.
If your family won't be there for you, I really don't mean this in an asshole way - but maybe they don't matter this year? our situations might be nothing in commong, but when my whole family disowned me for a year (well, a litttle over a yea), I was totally on my own, I had a $30K a year tution to pay, perscription drugs to buy with no insurance, and nowhere to live - got me to grow up fast. I just thought to myself "fuck them" and moved on. after awhile they all saw that they were jackasses and they grew up and let me back in and now they all act like that never happened. not the best way, but I just want to point out there are scenerios where you can get by.
as for the holidays, they are just another day - and again, I'm weird - I don't give a shit about holidays - I look around at Christmas and see everyone claiming they have holdiay cheer - but look at the traffic at malls, they all hate each other, people are freaking out about bills - what the fuck - the holiday cheer is only there while you are eating and opening presents and then gone. I'd much prefer that "holidays" were the one day where you could tell people what you thought of them - "hey happyscrappy - you are a shithead man!" and then the rest of the year be nice to people. they are all just manufactured bullshit.
This Monday I'm going to volunteer at a soup shelter in the city - that should bring some shit back into perspective for me. I'm not saying that is for everyone - but if you are smart like you say you are (and I hear you - I'm above the "genius" rating for IQ - although you don't have to be too high for that), it makes it both harder and easier - harder b/c you are so aware of all the bullshit going on, but easier in that you should be able to be smarter than everyone, read up on shit, see what is really going on - learn about the chemcials at work if you are depressed - money probs, learn how to scam the sytstem

I wish you the best man - I've been there and I bet a whole bunch of others have as well, even the readers here.

Again, let me know if I can help.

we should have a "who's smarter" contest on the board - I still have a year or so with the muscles, but I'll outbrain anyone here... uh oh, I hear the stampede of throngs of women rushing to my apartment door already. hee hee. good thing I amuse myself eh?

now if only I could get to sleep. I had a nice 3 hour nap after my workout today and now I'm not tired. at least no work tomorrow, just a drive in the snow.

hope things work out - feel free to e-mail if you get in a bind and need a dickhead to talk to.

(oh yeah, that first line in your first post a limp bizkit reference? I used to love them before they got huge, saw them back in the day when they were first on the warped tour, it was awesome, nobody knew who they were and were booing them - the crowd had just moved over to their stage after the Might Might Bosstones were done and the limp rocked. they've since become sort of the boy band of the metal stuff... but I digress)

Okay, so you're up to your neck in shit. I care. Send me an e-mail with a specific list of the top 5 things that are making you unhappy.

I will respond with a list of how YOU can fix your problems. You may not like what I write to you but I'll be honest and objective and non-judgemental. You can either accept my advice or not but I'll do my best to be of help.

[email protected].

P.S. I make mistakes too. But, I'm a lot older than you so I've probably already made the mistakes you're making now. But, I've learned from them and remember, only YOU control your destiny.

So where are you on your way to being a lawyer - are you in law school, in undergrad, high school? where you at bro?

And if you want to be a lawyer, you better get used to the lying stuff
(Until my soph year of college everyone told me I should be a lawyer because I was always taling my way out or into anything <g> )

I'm off to drive up to Albany... and probably get lost like I do every other time.