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 Elite Fitness Bodybuilding, Anabolics, Diet, Life Extension, Wellness, Supplements, and Training Boards
 Chat & Conversation
 What do you say to someone who is dying?
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| Author | Topic: What do you say to someone who is dying? | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder 
Posts: 205 |
What do you say to someone when they tell you they are dying. A female friend of mine from work has cancer in her pancreas, and it has now spread to her lungs. shes goin in for kemo, but they say she has little time left. shes has 2 little kids who she will never seee grow up, shit, shell be lucky if she see's christmas. she seems healthy, and i never paid close enough attention, to where she has gone on vacation 3 times this year (hospital) or why she only works part time these days. i cant even talk to her now, you look at her and she still seems happy, but the pain and fear she must have on the inside, is too much. god, when ever you think you have it bad, you meet someone that has it way worse. makes you feel guilty for all the shit you bitch about.     | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder 
Posts: 471 |
A girl I have been talking to.... her father is dying of colon cancer. About a year ago they gave him 2 years to live, so he has a little less than a year to go. Im not going to know what to say to her if Im still seeing her then. I guess I will just be a shoulder for her to cry on. NIck | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 192 |
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO SAY ANYTHING? JUST BE HER FRIEND AND BE THERE IF SHE WANTS TO TALK. SHE WAS TOLD SHE IS DYING... NOTHING YOU CAN DO OR SAY CAN CHANGE THAT... JUST BE HER FRIEND. | ||
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Moderator 
Posts: 2290 |
I unfortunately have a lot of experience in this, and I always just try to be myself.. joke.. and generally try to have a good time with them.... in other words enjoy the time we have together. | ||
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Freak 
Posts: 1944 |
There is nothing you can say....nothing can make the pain or sorrow easier...what you can do is make her time left as enjoyeable as possible....she thinks about death all teh time...help her to think about and enjoy life while she has it...any type of laugheter you can bring to her life would be the best thing you could do. My mother has cancer and her friend recently died from breast cancer. She was in her 30s and had a little boy 8, and girl 5. They think about the sadness of not seeign their children grow, dieing, leavign their husband, etc all day and night, it is the individuals that allow them to escape these thoughts that make their remaining time enjoyable. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 74 |
I never knew what to say to my dad, so I just avoided him.. I regret that now. My mom and bro just acted normally...I couldn't. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 205 |
Me personally, i could never deal with it, this woman, you look at her, and you just dont see it. she seems so normal, even when she knows she has so little time left. god i hate this kind of thing, ive been through this only a few times, its never easy. and i cant talk to her the same way, i only wish there was somthin i could do, donate a kidney, a liver or somthin. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 72 |
I know one thing you should not say. " I know what you are going through" No way possible, you are not that person. I had a Death education class and have lots of experience with this area. Just be a freind and if they want to talk be there for them when they are ready to do so. I know when my best friend died several years ago people were always trying to get me talk. " let your feelings out" I was quiet throughout the whole process. everybody deals with death different. let them deal with it on their terms not yours. | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 302 |
I held both of my parents in my arms as they took their last breaths. they both had cancer. Like Johnny O said, be yourself, if they want to talk about it they will. Be as happy as you can because these are the memories you will carry with you. I wish I could tell you more but it is not easy, just be there...... take care | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder 
Posts: 861 |
i would say be there for them and be sure they have made peace with god ------------------ http://pub33.ezboard.com/bburnboy check this board out its just gettin started | ||
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Cool Novice 
Posts: 35 |
Find some unfullfilled wish of hers and make it happen. That will speak for itself.Sorry to hear this bud. | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 959 |
King, Let her know that you care. And tell her you will be there if she ever needs anything. Its human nature to avoid things like this because death is something we dont think about. ------------------ | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 502 |
I wouldn't say much. Just a few words ------------------ | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 215 |
I cried when I read your post. I have had some experience with this, and the best thing you can do is to share the time you have left with her. I know that this is the worst time of year for such a loss, for her children will ALWAYS remember the loss, but be there for her and try to be the best you can for support. She must be very scared inside, I really can't type anymore right now.... | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 330 |
I'm sorry about your friend bro. Try to be encouraging to her. With a positive attitude the mind has been known to beat cancer. Then again alot of times people who are dying like to have a good listener to talk to. ------------------ |
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posted December 04, 2000 10:49 AM
