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 Elite Fitness Bodybuilding, Anabolics, Diet, Life Extension, Wellness, Supplements, and Training Boards
 Chat & Conversation
 Did You Ever Break Up With The One You Should Have Married?
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| Author | Topic: Did You Ever Break Up With The One You Should Have Married? | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder 
Posts: 238 |
I know its pointless to think about if theres nothing you can do about it, but I was stupid and left the girl I should have married 14 months ago. Now she lives outta town with a guy and I cant help but think what should have been if i wasnt so stupid. It sucks to get dumped, but it is a lot worse when you end up dumping someone only to realize later you should have stayed and possibly married. ------------------     | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder 
Posts: 312 |
I've never dumped someone like that. But 14 months ago I think the girl I was supposed to marry dumped me. I talked to her for the first time in 6 months this last week, and I can't stop thinking about her now. | ||
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Moderator 
Posts: 1672 |
Dave, I think perhaps I have done this. My last two years in college my best friend was a girl. It was originally a one-night deal but we just got to be really good friends. She was the kind of girl who - if she dressed up - could look really good, but also spent her Sundays in sweats watching football games. She was athletic - but not obsessive/anorexic type...she would go out and drink beers with me and not worry about the 8 ounces she might gain. We could do anything together. She was a year younger than I - and after I graduated she would come and visit like once a month. We saw a lot of each other - even after she graduated we did a really good job staying in touch. As we dated various losers, we always told each other that if we were both single at 30 - we should get married - it was kind of a joke but at the same time we both knew we could have done it. We just got along really well. Right now she's seeing someone - kind of serious - and I haven't talked to her in a while. I feel like the window may have closed - but rather than be upset, I see it as a lesson learned. Matt
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Elite Bodybuilder 
Posts: 626 |
THANKS... NOW I FEEL ALL HEAVY HEARTED... YES.. IT HAPPENED. SIGH..... I STARTED FEELING BETTER TOO. OH.. WELL... | ||
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Moderator
Posts: 5206 |
SEEMS LIKE WE'RE ALL IN THE SAME BOAT, I'M FEELING THAT WAY RIGHT NOW... ------------------ | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 238 |
Ive got her email addy and every once in a while she sends me messages and I send back, Its torture but I cant help it, I still believe she made a mistake moving out of town with some guy. From what was said in emails, she might want me still, and just not want to come out and say it in email because after all she lives outta town with a guy and she cant ecxactly pick up and move. Damn, I sound like a bitch but those who have been there know what I mean. ------------------ | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1069 |
Superdave...and you other guys.....then why don't you just put yourself out there and say something? You only live once and if you feel strong about what your feeling...then what the hell are you waiting for???...waiting untill she marries someone else so you can kick yourself for the rest of your life? GO FOR IT SUGAR...LIVE YOUR LIFE....  | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 228 |
DAVE I KNOW HOW UR FEELIN BRO. MY HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEART WAS ONE OF THE GREATEST GIRLS I EVER KNEW. AT THE TIME I WAS WAY TOO IMMATURE AND TREATED HER LIKE SHIT. WE SPENT THREE YEARS TOGETHER AND THEN AFTER ALL SHE DID FOR ME I STILL BROKE UP WITH HER. NOW SHES LIVING WITH HER CURRENT B/F AND SHES PREGNANT. KINDA HURTS WHEN I THINK ABOUT IT, BUT SHES HAPPIER NOW WITHOUT ME AND IVE FOUND A NEW GIRL IN MY LIFE. I KNOW NOW HOW TO TREAT WOMEN, EVENTHOUGH IT TOOK LOSING SOMEONE GREAT TO LEARN....ZEUS | ||
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Cool Novice 
Posts: 33 |
SuperDave, I'm 43 and happily married but I can tell you I've been in your shoes. Unless you think you have a chance I'd move on. No sense beating yourself up over it. I use to and sometimes I still wonder but you got to move on. There's other women out there that'll should take your mind off o her. | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 523 |
Well why not everyone just shut up and row since we all are in the same boat. I had the girl that I would have just dreamed into life had I never met her. She was everything I ever wanted, physically, intellectually, talent wise. God, I worshipped the ground she walked on, the only thing was that she had a couple of traits and habits that were totally destructive to the relationship, she could never accept the fact that she was much older than myself and she was very insecure and jealous. Not just a little, but too a very big and destructive level. Anyone who has gone through this will tell you that Envy and Jealousy and Insecurity are some beasts that no one can slay themselves. The solution has to come from within the person. Anyhow, I spent many years with her. And it was on top of the world, I was never happier in my life. Except for the arguments which were the worst I have ever had. Forget the ones you had as teenagers with your parents, these were world class ones. I left her twice before, the first time returning because I believe that everyone deserves a second chance, the second time I returned, I believed her promises to change and see a counselor, but the third time, I never looked back and I sometimes wonder if I should have. I have since met a girl that is very wonderful on the inside, she certainly has her head together as well, she is making me very happy so far, but sometimes I think back about what could have been and what should have been and sometimes I wonder if she was sincere in making changes that last time and I just never stuck around to give her a chance. It is bad when you meet a girl that (eventually) I will marry and you still think of the one before. I guess it is true what they say that True Love Never Goes Away Easy. Then again, I do feel like I am cheating the girl I am with know because I often think of the other one. Not sexual thoughts, though sex with her was the best, but more along the lines of caring what is going on in her life. What a bum I must be right? Jae | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1069 |
I'm not found of whining...I feel you gotta make the big plays to get the good gains....if you don't throw the Hail Mary you'll not only not make a touch down, you lose always wondering what if..... My last relationship was on/off..blah blah blah...then finially he called a big play..I went out for the catch, but when the time came time to throw he didn't throw......so now I know for ceratain (god I just love those football analogies,..."lifes a game...play your best" | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 963 |
People break up for a reason, if you cant even date someone there is no way you should marry them. Dating problems are trivial compared to the finacial responsibility of getting married and having kids- Oh yeah, just because you love someone doesnt mean you should marry them. You do need more than just love for a marriage to work. (responsibility, respect, stability) [This message has been edited by Mr. T (edited October 16, 2000).] | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1222 |
GREAT PHUCKING TOPIC... (IT REALLY IS) SO PEOPLE REGRET THIS THEIR ENTIRE LIVES HUH? JUST WONDERFUL. | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 523 |
Great answer Shagwell and Mr. T | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1069 |
Thanks "JAY"  | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 523 |
You got it Sugar Shagwell, Hope your next guy throws the ball on the big play. Remember Jae is my initials. J.A.E. But for you I will be Jay any ol' day. wink, wink | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 523 |
You got it Sugar Shagwell, Hope your next guy throws the ball on the big play. Remember Jae is my initials. J.A.E. But for you I will be Jay any ol' day. wink, wink | ||
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Cool Novice
Posts: 31 |
The girl I'm seeing now is totally amazing. She is only 19 but I am the youngest guy she has ever dated, being 21. Her ex boyfriend is 28 and a stock broker. He kept calling her after I started seeing her so I got pissed one night at a club and told him to get it through his head it was over and to fuck off. His eyes started watering and the told me to never fuck up like he did and appreciate my girl. I almost felt bad for him. Oh, well. DC | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1069 |
Jae...thanks again, your a sweet heart...I hope I complete the next pass for a td baby | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 523 |
Agent, just remember if you run out for the ball and he doesn't throw it, just keep running. When that happens, one person is always the one to stand around and go "WTF??" Don't let that person be you. | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1069 |
Not to worry....I kept movin on up...to the east er...west side...to a delux apartment...ere townhouse...in the sky I'm a pretty much cut and dry person....he called the play I played my position, he didn't deliver...new quaterback please hhmmm I'll take Favre PLEASE I'm cut and dry, but I understand people are human and make mistakes (these do not include cheating of any kind--thats zero tolerance in my book), But I gave him 3 trys, now he's out | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 376 |
No, but I married the girl I should have dumped. | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1069 |
BigTruck...god I'm glad I read you previous post or I would have been laughing at this one....then would have felt really bad for a minute or two..then I would have gotten over it | ||
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Freak 
Posts: 1819 |
Yep...I dicked over a really nice girl..She is still modeling after 5 years...saw her on MTV a while back. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 238 |
Shagwell: I did make the big play, but all I have is her email so I had to do it that way. I basically put my soul out to her and put the ball in her court. She somewhat reciprocated but in her situation there isnt much she can do, so she basically told me to move on. I cant help but think about it since she feels the same way I do after all we have said to each other. Bigtruck: LOL ------------------ | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 576 |
Does getting dumped count,lol? ------------------ | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 976 |
been there, i'm over it now though. there's really nothing you can do if she has moved on. timing is everything.... the best you can do is live and learn from it... ------------------ | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 238 |
Thanks guys ------------------ | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 238 |
bump for stubborness.... ------------------ | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 377 |
i'm trying to get in touch with a girl i really care about, but im having a hard time with it i lost all contact completely for like a year. i dont expect anything to come up with it, maybe a 10% chance something good would come out of it, but you gotta try. i honestly believe that. no matter how much shit has happened, and no matter how much you think the window of oppurtunity is long gone, GO FOR IT. if you really think you have a chance with that person, u just gotta try. thats my take anyway. i try not to beat around the bush too much, if it doesnt work, THEN i'll move on. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 225 |
oh gosh!!!! yeah great topic. i feel the same way!!! i cant stop thinkin about my ex. she was my first. i had waited all along to save myself till marriage, but when i met this girl and started dating, i could not resisit1!this girl is ABSOLUTELY ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS!!!!!!!!! we got together, fucked a couple hundred times, and then in time i got bored of her, because she was not very bright, besdies the fact that she cheated on me with my best buddy. i avoided her for a while while we dated, then we got back etc, etc, then she met a rich 39 year old who owned reataurants and she strted weorking for him and they were a couple.after she went her own seperate way, i wanted her back, due to loneliness or whatever. since we broke up in march of 98' i have avoided females as i dont EVER want to feel that way again. though this town is soo small, ive run into her a few times, and visited her at her apartment yesterday. she is a rotten person, but i will always love her. the only way to get over someone is to find someone else. so im gonna go back out there and give it a try. lol one thing i learned is that no matter how GORGEOUS she is,and how much sex you have!!! she will get boring and old if their is no personality there. looks are not so much of a priority because of it. LOVE HURTS!!!!!!! -Pops | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1069 |
Superdave..if ya made the big play and she didn;t go out for the catch....then you need to move on...(I'm a beating this football ananlogy to the ground or what?)...its not easy to put you heart and hope out there to get it returned...so don't stay around for another shalakin...Know in you heart you gave and tried all you could and ..it didn't work. Thats the facts, once you accept them you can move on. Thats what I realize with my ex. He was my first my last....and I thought my everything..but he obviously didn't feel the same the same. You can't help who you fall in love with...but you have to realize you deserve someone who can return the love and give you what you give them. So keep you head up buckaroo...you will find someone better than the last | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 68 |
Total opposite for me i married the one i should have gotten rid of, least i would still have some of my toys she ended up taking!! Live and Learn Right?...Now i live with an amazing woman that tries so hard to please me, but i have serious reservations on getting married again but i know this girl comes from a wonderful family and would be the one that would marry me and stay with me no matter what!! |
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posted October 15, 2000 09:15 PM
