UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone!
  George Spellwin's ELITE FITNESS Discussion Boards
  Chat & Conversation
  Here's a bunch that'll make some blood boil. :)

Post New Topic  
profile | register | preferences | faq | search

Author Topic:   Here's a bunch that'll make some blood boil. :)
flashman
Amateur Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 24)
posted June 24, 2000 06:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for flashman   Click Here to Email flashman     Edit/Delete Message UIN: 48942457
How many men does it take to open a beer?
> Open a beer? It should be opened by the time she brings it!
>
> Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
> Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably
> never be able to buy you a Bass boat!
>
> Why do women have smaller feet than men?
> It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand
closer
> to the kitchen sink.
>
> How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
> When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me."
>
> How do you fix a woman's watch?
> You don't need to. There is a clock on the oven.
>
> If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at
the
> front door, whom do you let in first?
> The dog of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
>
> What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
> A woman that won't do what she's told.
>
> I� married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
>
>� haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months: I don't like to interrupt
her.
>
> What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence?
> Divorced.
>
> Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive
by
> 90%. It is called Wedding Cake.
>
> Marriage is a 3 ring circus: Engagement Ring, Wedding Ring, Suffering.
>
> What a fight. My wife asked me "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"
>
> In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
> Then God created Man and rested.
> Then God created Woman.
> Since then, no one has rested.
>
> Why do men die before their wives? They want to....
>
> A beggar walked up to a well dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and
> said, "I haven't eaten anything in four days."
> She looked at him and said, "Oh, I wish I had your willpower."
>
> Young Son: "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a
man
> doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
> Dad: "That happens in every country, son."
>
> A man inserted an advertisement in the classified: "Wife Wanted.." The
> next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:
"You
> can have mine."
>
> The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.
>
> Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street
with
> a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful.
>
> Why do married men gain weight while bachelors don't?
> Bachelors go to the refrigerator, see nothing they want, then go to
bed.
> Married guys go to the bed, see nothing they want, then go to the
> refrigerator.

------------------
Any speling errors in this document are due to software bugs

IP: Logged

slabcat
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 113)
posted June 24, 2000 09:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for slabcat   Click Here to Email slabcat     Edit/Delete Message
Heh heh, good humor!

------------------
Someday we will meet in a place where there is no darkness, or S-police!

IP: Logged

MrMuscle
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 1073)
posted June 28, 2000 05:21 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for MrMuscle   Click Here to Email MrMuscle     Edit/Delete Message UIN: 70512967
hehehe some funny shit.

------------------
"Pain, is only weakness leaving your body"

"...damn you for not giving my TEST" - Metallica

IP: Logged

Motorhed
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 168)
posted June 29, 2000 12:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Motorhed   Click Here to Email Motorhed     Edit/Delete Message
BOOOWWWAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!! Thanx man that helped me get my day started.

IP: Logged

Big Buck
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 137)
posted June 29, 2000 12:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Big Buck   Click Here to Email Big Buck     Edit/Delete Message
funny shit bro....

------------------
To all the real bros, keep it real!

IP: Logged

skydancer
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 240)
posted June 29, 2000 01:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for skydancer   Click Here to Email skydancer     Edit/Delete Message UIN: 76679089
A husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed when his wife complained, as usual, "I have a headache!"

"Perfect!" her husband said. "I was just in the bathroom powdering my penis with aspirin."

"You can take it orally or as a suppository........it's up to you!"

_________________________________________

One Saturday afternoon, a man was sitting in his lawn chair drinking beer and watching his wife mow the lawn.

A neighbor lady was so outraged at this, she came over and shouted at the man, "You should be hung!"

To which he calmly replied, "I am. That's why she cuts the grass!"

IP: Logged

Capt'n_Crunch
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 1003)
posted June 29, 2000 01:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Capt'n_Crunch   Click Here to Email Capt'n_Crunch     Edit/Delete Message
LMAO, thats funny shit

IP: Logged

Capt'n_Crunch
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 1003)
posted June 29, 2000 01:18 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Capt'n_Crunch   Click Here to Email Capt'n_Crunch     Edit/Delete Message
LMAO, thats funny shit

IP: Logged

MrMuscle
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 1073)
posted June 29, 2000 06:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for MrMuscle   Click Here to Email MrMuscle     Edit/Delete Message UIN: 70512967
hehe you rock my world Sky

------------------
"Pain, is only weakness leaving your body"

"...damn you for not giving my TEST" - Metallica

IP: Logged

Karate guy
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 476)
posted June 29, 2000 07:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Karate guy   Click Here to Email Karate guy     Edit/Delete Message
LOL, I'm printing that out and showin it to some dudes I know. A thousand laughs.

IP: Logged

Rexie317
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 204)
posted June 29, 2000 08:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Rexie317   Click Here to Email Rexie317     Edit/Delete Message
LMAO. im printing that stuff out too. good stuff man.

------------------
The power to endure pain outlives the power to inflict it...the harder the conflict the more glorious the triumph. It is dearness that gives everything its value.
-Rexie the Italian Tank.

IP: Logged

Romeo
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 190)
posted June 29, 2000 08:48 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Romeo   Click Here to Email Romeo     Edit/Delete Message
a man and a women have been dating for a few years and are going to get married....they are both virgins......so they do not want to have any surprises the night they finally have sex...so the women say i have no chest i am as flat as a wall......and the man say i am hung like a new born baby....so a few months passes and they get married and are in the hotel room getting ready to have sex for the first time...the women takes off her shirt and says see im as flat as a wall....so the man pulls down his pants and the women starts going fucking nuts ...you lied to me....he says no i didnt ...so she say you said you were hung like a new born baby..and he says ...i am .....im ....8 pounds and 7 ounces...ha ha ha that kills me


peace romeo

IP: Logged

Kahn
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 532)
posted June 29, 2000 10:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Kahn     Edit/Delete Message
Romeo, I heard that with 8lbs 7oz and 23 inches long

IP: Logged

kram696969
Pro Bodybuilder
(Total posts: 255)
posted July 01, 2000 07:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for kram696969   Click Here to Email kram696969     Edit/Delete Message UIN: 15497701
funny shit!!

kram-mark
just do'in my best...

IP: Logged

All times are ET (US)

Post New Topic  
Hop to:

Contact Us | Back to Elite Fitness

Elite Fitness Discussion Board

Powered by: Ultimate Bulletin Board (UltimateBB), Version 5.42a
� Infopop Corporation (formerly Madrona Park, Inc.), 1998-1999.