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 Guys, just need to get this off my chest.
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| Author | Topic: Guys, just need to get this off my chest. |
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DRRman Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 115) |
posted April 23, 2000 11:56 PM
 
man, im in love with this girl whom i've known for the past 8 years. We have always had chemistry but have never really dated, im single going on 4 months now, and she's still dating her present boyfriend of 2 years. Last night she crashed at my house, we fell asleep on the couch covered up together. Man, i care so much for this girl, i can't get my mind off of her, shit, its so bad i can't even get my mind on lifting weights, plus im mid cycle on AS and im horny as hell. I just don't know what i should do, should i just ask her if theres a chance? Would that ruin our friendship? sorry guys, i just don't have anyone i can really talk to and im really down and out for this chick right now. IP: Logged |
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aceguy Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 168) |
posted April 24, 2000 12:11 AM
i know what your feeling bro, u can even read my post down the page. you see i told my girl that i love her all the time, but now i think i have said it to many times and it doesnt effect her like it used to, i want her back so bad. so i know how you feel about asking her if there is a chance. you know that if u ask there is an answer, however u may not want to hear the answer she has to give, so you wont ask. But bro do it, tell her everything, its better for her to know, bc its not considred a chance unless you take it. go for it, tell her all your feelings. if it was ment to be it will be, stay strong and keep us posted goodluck aceguy IP: Logged |
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Capt'n_Crunch Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 105) |
posted April 24, 2000 12:51 AM
Gotta agree with Ace.... Hey dogg, I have seen your situation quite a few times.....if you decide to tell her you could be risking alot; if she has been with this guy for 2 years , she obviously must care for him and if you talk to her about it and she feels really uncomfortable with what you say, you can pretty much throw the friendship out the window cus it will never be the same no matter what you guys say to one another .... but if you really love her that much, I think you should go for it; yea you risk your friendship but its like mom always said..... "Its better to have tried and failed then never have tried at all" IP: Logged |
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Pubert Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 56) |
posted April 24, 2000 02:07 AM
Well, Casa Nova's...how about a little help on a different situation... I'm 24, she's 34, I really like her and we hang out a lot...she sends mixed signals big time, and I'm thinking that I have a chance, if I can just kiss her/talk to her about my feelings...but that's the hard part because of certain problems... The problems...well, 1: we work on the same project in the same group in the same company...her cube is next to mine (what luck...this isn't how we met by the way, I can tell that story if anyone is interested...the cube thing was a coincidence due to a recent move), if I make a fool out of myself, its not just like I can forget about it like with any other woman...I could potentially have a sexual harrassment suit on my hands if I've completely mis-read her, or I could cause inter-project problems (awkward situation for both of us!)...I may only be seeing what I want to see and this is my career here, not just McD's, so its not like I can just get another job... and 2: I originally met her with the intent on hooking her up with my buddy (this was before I realized she was 34. I saw her, she was attractive, and my buddy was single...but we've all gone out together, and she has really grown on me...A LOT!), and now he's got eyes for her, but everyone can completely tell its not reciprical...in fact, I don't think she likes him at all! He really doesn't take ANY initiative with her...but still thinks he has a chance (he's more of a bro actually, so I really care for him) Even though he doesn't stand a chance, I don't want him becoming upset with me 3: The age gap...which is another reason I find it hard to read into this...she never volunteers any information, and she keeps her feelings really bottle up tight, so that I can't read into them...the only reason I think I have any shot in hell is because of some body language, and the fact that she's touchy feely with me (but I really don't think its any more so than with any other person...). I'm finding it very difficult to distinguish between A) Just a friendship and things just friends would do, and B) Friendship with a little more than just things friends would do (if you can interpret that)...I have no idea what her "type" is, and if I even fit the bill...she may just be friendly...?!?!?! What the f*ck do I do now? I REALLY like her...she's really grown on me! Oh yeah, did I mention I have a GF, and the other girl knows it? My current GF has one foot out the door, however, its about that time anyways...things haven't been going well...My GF knows about this other woman, but doesn't know the extent of our involvement (hanging out...going out...). What a situation to be in...and its not just physical attraction (though that is a part of it What do I do? Any suggestions? I'm supposed to have a picnic in the park with her sometime this week, in which she agreed to message my shoulders (a friendly thing?!?!?!)...I was thinking of making something of that time...but again, this isn't just a simple black and white type relationship...if I screw up, I screw up HARD!!!! Normally, I wouldn't make such a big deal about it, but this is a coworker, and one of my bros has it in for her.... Am I just completely mis-reading the signals? Since I've had a GF for some time now, I've mis-placed my guide to being a player book Please help! What would you guys do in this situation? Pubert [This message has been edited by Pubert (edited April 24, 2000).] IP: Logged |
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Blaine Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 4) |
posted April 24, 2000 09:22 AM
Hi Pubert, I read your dilemma and maybe I can help. I am 30 and my wife is 37 so I can relate to the older woman scenario. The first thing you need to do is decide what you want to do with your current girlfriend. If you want to hang on to her then forget about getting anywhere the 34 year old. Odds are she's way to seasoned and mature to want to play favorites against your girlfriend. Besides it's only fair to both of them to let them know where you stand. It sounds like your reading pretty deep into her body language. If she's just casually touching your shoulder or arm when she has a question for you or laughs at a funny joke you tell I wouldn't read that as her coming on to you. The shoulder massage she offered you may lead to something if you play your cards right though. If you are only infatuated with her it will be easy to tell once you have kissed her or more. If all the sudden she becomes just another woman then you were only liking her because she seemed intangible. Once you got her the thrill was over. If your feelings grow stronger then maybe there's potential for something more. That's for you to decide. As far as your buddy goes it sounds like he's had a chance and isn't impressing her very much. I would just let nature take it's course with that situation and let her tell him she's just not interested. I could go on more but I feel this reply is to long as it is. Good luck bro! IP: Logged |
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Platinum Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 147) |
posted April 24, 2000 12:01 PM
Well, I am not a psychatrist but I play one on the internet... First of all women have a power over men. Some know this and they love to be able to make you do what they want and some just do not care about the whole situation. Basically women do not like guys who tell them they would do anything for them anytime, whatever, whereever, whenever. This shows a lack of confidence. What you want to do is when she calls you up to help her do something tell her you are "busy" or going out with another girl. Women are very competitive with members of there own sex. If you are unavailable because of another woman that will pique her interest in you. Never talk to her more than 5 minutes on the phone, after a while of this and she is either more interested or about to lose interest then you tell her you think she is attractive and you would like to date her. Women never want to ruin a friendship, you have to let her know that you are her friend but you want more then that. How do I know this? Well, I have dated women, I have not cracked them completely but I have found the less you act like you want them, the more they will want you. Be apathetic, spend the least amount of money on them as possible. I used to be a real nice guy (I still am once I get to know a girl) but I have found out that women aren't interested in nice guys. Platinum ------------------ IP: Logged |
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kosfer Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 150) |
posted April 24, 2000 12:43 PM
First things first guys. It sounds to me like you need to get laid. Don't get me wrong bro, there's nothing wrong with that I'm in a similar phase myself. But the thing is that its spring time right now and EVERYBODY is going nuts! My suggestion would be, get some and then trust me you will not be thinking of her that much. That's what happens to me all the time, everytime its been a while I fall for the first chick that is going to look at me or I start thinking about ex girlfriends. It goes away though after I get it out of my system...YOU KNOW???? IP: Logged |
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Capt'n_Crunch Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 105) |
posted April 24, 2000 01:34 PM
Not to be mean but screw your friend..... just because you like some one doesnt mean they are off the market ... Most of my friends and I have an understanding, if she aint yours then she is open game ( sit him down and tell him whats up, if he is a good friend then he will understand unless he is totally nuts about her). As far as I can tell, it sounds more like you are just interested in her than crazy about her, so what her desk is next to yours....its not sexual harrassment to ask her out. My brother was 20 and was dating some 40 year old woman with a daughter who was 19.. big deal. If your interested just ask her out and if she isnt interested just tell her that you hope you didnt make her uncomfortable and play it off and act like nothing ever happened. As far as your GF, if you dont want her anymore let her go....my mom is forty and she has had guys younger than me ask her out....pisses me off when she tells me and makes me want to go beat their skulls in but thats another story...anyways, she just tells them that she is married and has a kid as old as them..no big deal.... I think that lady is old enough to be mature about it so just take a chance, but I would definitely dump the GF first (you said you are about to anyways)...you dont want her to find out you still got a GF and think you are just trying to use her for sex. On the other hand if your friend is really crazy about her then I would just call it quits, dump my GF and find me a new chick ( it wouldnt be worth risking a friendship over) IP: Logged |
), I'm sure its just infatuation, but I really want to get somewhere with this other woman...All times are ET (US) | |
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