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 WHAT'S THE CRAZIEST THING YOU GUYS HAVE SEEN IN YOUR GYM
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| Author | Topic: WHAT'S THE CRAZIEST THING YOU GUYS HAVE SEEN IN YOUR GYM |
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MONSTROSITY Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 183) |
posted April 14, 2000 10:54 PM
   I have to say, I have seen some pretty funny and pretty strange things over the years. The craziest thing I have seen though has to be this story: A real roid head frequented our gym, he was very adamant about proving his ability to use AS and lift big weights. As most roid heads do, this guy had a following of pencil necked geeks that slaved over him, astonished by his every move. This chosen day, Mr. Roidhead was going to prove to his followers what real men are made of. He loaded the bar with 7 plates a side(675) and prepared for a big squat. He started to beat his head into the bar until blood flowed from his forehead. His fan club was in awe, he then unracked the big weight and lowered into a deep squat then slowly came up. He let out a roar, and everyone cheered. He then ran across the gym knocking people out his way on route to his gym bag. He pulled out a bottle of d-bol tabs(pinks) and roared then proceeded to swallow the hole bottle. He put the bottle to his lips and emptied the contents, he then began to scream and ran out of the gym. I was the only one laughing, I simply could not help myself. I have no idea how many tabs were in the bottle but it was enough to fill up his mouth!!! IP: Logged |
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FreakMonster Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 74) |
posted April 14, 2000 11:02 PM
Here's one I think I told earlier but it's revised. There's this fagggot looking dude in the gym we call the Gerbiler. Probably weighs about a buck forty and walks with a hunch in his back and a wife beater shirt. I swear he just walks around the gym and stares at every freaking guy. Not to mention a crazy looking motherfucker too. He's usually in the gym 3 freaking hours and most of the time he is just staring at guys. I guys he really likes to check out the big guys in the guym. He'll go do like one set of Bicep curls for one set and then sit there and stare for 20 min. I swear he looks like Gomer Pile. Anyways I guess he had something for my work out partner and my partner told me he was sick of the Gerbiler staring at him and that the next time he stared he was going to say something. So sure enough the Gerbiler stared at my partner again. Now he was fucking furious so he takes he 225 pound juicing body over there and yells "What the FUCK do you keep looking at" "I don't care if your a fucking faggot but quit fucking staring at me" "Next time you fucking stare at me I'm gonna throw you through the fucking window" IP: Logged |
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deltman Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 405) |
posted April 14, 2000 11:40 PM
I've got a strange story too.....there's this older guy that would come into the gym at 5am and would be wearing frickin' dress clothes like he was headed to work right afterward. Anyway, he would take his belt out of the loops on his pants......and then wrap it around his waist like a lifting belt! Funniest thing I ever saw man!! Oh yeah, and he would walk around giving advice on technique and such. I've encountered the staring thing too, I'm all natural still, but I have large shoulders and people seem to look at you like........how come you're succeeding?? Instead of going to the gym for years like they do and their bodies never change one iota! Good post. deltman ------------------ IP: Logged |
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2legit2quit Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 145) |
posted April 14, 2000 11:45 PM
I went back to school not too long ago, at a large midwestern university. When I first started, I used one of the intermural sports facilities to work out in. Pretty shitty gym and packed with young dudes around 18-20. As you can imagine, there were a lot of inexperienced lifters, I could tell a hundred stories, but one does stick out. I was doing squats one day, and this stick figure comes in and starts doin' squats on the rack right next to me. This kid could have not been more than 150# and around 6'. I don't know if he was tryin' to keep up with me or what, cuz I squat heavy (up to 365# for 5-6 reps), and I squat deep (non of that parallel shit). Well, I look over and Twiggy's got 225# on the bar and squatting with about a 6 inch range of motion. I see that a lot, but what really concerned me was the weight. It was obviously too much, but I would have felt bad sayin' something to him. I kept watching him out of the corner of my eye. Next set, he adds two quarters, for a total of 275#...I almost said something to him, but didn't have the heart. Anyway, he takes it off the rack, and sets up for his first mini-rep. All of a sudden he just snaps forward, bent at the waist, with all 275# balancing/teatering on the back of his neck! I couldn't believe it, me and a couple other guys just stood there in shock...I thought his back was broken. Before we could do anything...CRASH!...he lets it drop on the squat rack. Naturally he's all red faced and embarrassed. So, what does he do? Takes all the weight off (I'm thinkin', smart move), then he proceeds to re-rack the bar with 225#, and resume his mini-rep sets. Unbelievable! The moral of this story, is that lifting heavy weights is only impressive when done with control and using proper form. To many young, inexperienced lifters don't realize that. IP: Logged |
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animal B Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 399) |
posted April 14, 2000 11:58 PM
freakmonster,,thats exactly what you or your friends freakin are freakin assholes..maybe you have aproblem with your masculinity...Im straight but when Im in the gyms in south beach mimai..Im the only straight guy..and when guys come up and touch my biceps and complement me...I say thanks...I dont go into raid rage for a guy starring...grow up a bit, or ez up on the juice... IP: Logged |
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macrophage69alpha Moderator (Total posts: 1464) |
posted April 15, 2000 12:04 AM
short but sad story saw a guy doing close grip bench, with an open hand grip and 135lbs on the bar, he lost his grip and the bar proceeded to slide down the back of his arms and land squarely on his open mouth- needless to say most of his front teeth were broken or knocked out- to this day the bar has teeth marks on it. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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SCHNiKEN Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 310) |
posted April 15, 2000 03:11 AM
I wish i had a story but i dont but i gotta say this is the funniest shit i ever heard keep it coming.. IP: Logged |
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Deepsquat Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 635) |
posted April 15, 2000 07:16 AM
Last week a dude doing hacks at my gym...was putting the weights on the weight tree that is attached to the hack machine!! he was adding a 45 pound plate after each set,to each side until he got up to 6 plates per side on the weight tree! IP: Logged |
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hoendo Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 6) |
posted April 15, 2000 07:39 AM
I saw a guy shaving his balls in the showers at my gym. Isn't that something he should be doing at home? IP: Logged |
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tri~zilla Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 259) |
posted April 15, 2000 09:01 AM
so let me get this straight animal B, you let guys come up and touch and feel your arms and you say freak needs to check his mental state? just think about this for a second, what would you think of a girl who let you come up thinka 'bout it! if you are ok with teasing one for the books, ------------------ IP: Logged |
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vdevil Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 678) |
posted April 15, 2000 09:31 AM
My favorite is when some fat chick wipes out on the treadmill.LOL VDEVIL IP: Logged |
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FreakMonster Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 74) |
posted April 15, 2000 09:44 AM
Animal B: I have nothing against gay people but you know what? It is very rude to continually stare at somebody, don't you agree. I mean if some dude stared at you EVERYTIME you were in the gym, wouldn't you start feeling a little uncomfortable? Well that's exactly how my friend started feeling so he went up and said something. And I'm sure nothing is more annoying than somebody staring at you continually when your on the juice. Drive you nuts, doesn't it guys? IP: Logged |
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DoctorSavage Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 163) |
posted April 15, 2000 09:45 AM
Back in college, I was a fitness instructor at a gym near school, one evening I was wiping down the machines and I see this guy standing in the corner of the weight pit, facing the corning with his hands at his crotch. I couldn't belive it. I thought this dumb bastard was pissing in the corner! I went over to him and asked him "Can I help you"? I don't know what I would have done if he had been taking a leak. I was mistaken; he says realy quietly "I think I broke it". "Broke what"? "My Dick" he says. He is real pale, and shaking. I finally get the story from him. He was doing lateral raises, and brought the dumbells down to fast and crushed his unit between 'em. I called the ambulance, they carted him off, and I've been laughing about it ever since. I can't see sombody doing lateral raises without thinking about it. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Platinum Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 191) |
posted April 15, 2000 09:47 AM
Hoendo, I almost fucking threw up I was laughing so hard. The craziest shit I have seen is these 3 major roid boys. They walk into the gym, usually wearing baggies and tight t-shirts to cover their huge bellies. I can tell these dudes have not done any research on steroids because they are not cut just a little thick. They scream after each rep which is usually just one. Well, one day they asked me and my partner to get on the leg extension rack so they "could have more weight". They had racked this thing with 20 plates with nickels hanging off of the ends. So a total of about 960 pounds. I weighed at the time 186 and my partner was pushing 300. So to make a long story short the biggest dude in the bunch gets in, we jump on the stack and perch there very gently. This dude is going to try and rep 1446. He goes down once, knees to chest. Then to our astonishment he gets it up once and locks his knees...that is when we heard a "pop". His friends are high fiving and laughing and he looks like he is about to take a shit right there on the pad. Not smart enough to realize he damaged his patellas or ligaments he goes down again knees to chest. Guess what? "POP" This time way louder. He begins grunting and his face turns 4 shades of red then for shades of purple. His friends push the carriage up and off of his legs. This dude tries to stand up but his left leg is bent back a little and his right leg is spaghetti. Needless to say they had to get an ambulance. That dude was back in the gym in a month! Not doing legs, he was in a wheelchair, but doing chest, arms, back and shoulders. Needless to say after he tore his pec he learned that you should only do weights that can be controlled. Platinum ------------------ IP: Logged |
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deltman Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 405) |
posted April 15, 2000 09:51 AM
I'm still laughin' vdevil!!!! Too much man!!!! deltman ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Jhamilton Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 65) |
posted April 15, 2000 11:11 AM
Now Freak be honest you stared at women in the same manner as the "gerbiler" at some time in your life. I am sure ever women hasnt welcomed your advances. It amazing that when someone is gay, straight men always assume that the "faggot" wants them . This is not the case. Most fags are not trying to get in your jock, they just want to go about life and have the same rights as you do. Really I think you have some issues with your sexuality. By the way watch out cause them "queers" have muscles too, And are just as capable as you to. How are you going to feel if you got yo ass kicked by a fag! I could happen IP: Logged |
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Mr. T Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 453) |
posted April 15, 2000 11:24 AM
If you want to talk about homosexual activity go to the chat board. Keep the funny shit coming! IP: Logged |
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FreakMonster Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 74) |
posted April 15, 2000 12:35 PM
Hamilton don't you understand it's FUCKING rude to stare at someone. Don't you fucking get it? I don't care if your a fucking fag or not. It's plain rude. Let's send the Gerbiler to your gym and let him stare at you for 3 hours everyday. How would you feel about that? IP: Logged |
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el cubano Moderator (Total posts: 492) |
posted April 15, 2000 12:37 PM
The funniest thing I ever saw was my old 145lb work out partner hit this 250lb powerlifter over the head with a 35lb dumbbell just because the big guy looked at him funny! ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Jhamilton Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 65) |
posted April 15, 2000 12:48 PM
Yes its rude to stare. I will give you that. But thats All I am going to give you. LOL IP: Logged |
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big dogg Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 70) |
posted April 15, 2000 01:06 PM
I want more funny shit. Damn, I picture the scene! Crazy ass shit, that dude downing that bottle of pills and running out of the gym. See that's why steroid have a bad image. What if you walked in a gym for the very first time I saw that? -it's funny ass hell, though. Just imagine dude's mental state!!! IP: Logged |
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XXXL Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 236) |
posted April 15, 2000 01:45 PM
i swear some of you work out at my gym. we have a "gerbiler" though i've never seen him actually work out. he just kinda hangs around talking to anybody who will listen. i work out with my brother and he went to school with this guy so he's always comming up to us and talking about some of the strangest shit i've ever heard. anyway, what we do when we have a new little fittness bunny in the gym who's there just to look good and never works out, we tell the "gerbiler" that's she's hot for him. this guy will not take no for an answer. and most of the girls are just too nice to tell him to go to hell. he's gotta be somewhat retarted. not real bad but there's something definitely wrong with him. anyway we stoped doing this when he started following some of the girls home. just think how shitty you'd feel if something happend? as for vdevil, some cow took a dive about two months ago. i couldn't help but laughing. i almost fell over i was laughing so hard. she jumped up so fast, she flipped around and knocked some other dude off his bike. i'm laughing my ass off right now. i haven't thought about that in awhile. IP: Logged |
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Primo57 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 572) |
posted April 15, 2000 02:02 PM
O.K. are gym has it arranged so that the abductor and adductor machines are facing the leg press machine - and we all know that women LOVE those machines. Anyway one time when I was resting between a set I apparently was staring straight ahead. I didn't even notice it but a big fat girl was doing her exercises across from me and and thought I was staring at her! Anyway, she took it upon herself to complain to the manager that I was making her feel self-conscious and that I was sexually harassing her. What the fuck?? Anyway, she wishes I'd stare at her, hehe, and the manager basically thought it was a load of shit. Oh yeah, I saw a dude waxing his ass with hot oil after taking a shower..go home and do that shit! IP: Logged |
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androx Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 355) |
posted April 15, 2000 02:37 PM
I didn't personally see this but I have several friends who worked at the gym where it happened. This is not funny but fucked up. All of the leg press machines were full so this idiot decides to make his own leg press. He put a flat bench under the smith-press machine and laid flat on his back with his feet above him pressing the bar over his head. He put 365lbs on it and started to rep it and then the bar slipped off his feet and smashed right into his forehead. Aparently the impact popped his eyes out of their sockets and they were hanging out of his face with blood everywhere. I don't know exactly what happened to him but he did survive. androx IP: Logged |
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Sittin' On Diesel Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 375) |
posted April 15, 2000 02:48 PM
Primo57- you should have walked up to her and told her that if anything it was just harrassment, not sexual harrassment. Should have asked her, how the fuck could it be sexaul when you're a big fucking fat bitch, and I could never get my shit up looking at your rolls and cottage cheese thighs. That would have set her straight. Man I see soo many fools in the gym it's not even funny. At first, I thought that I should take it upon myself to help out my fellow bro's. Then, I thought- why the fuck should I do that...if they were serious about it, then they would either ask intelligent questions or try to learn why they're not growing. I personally like the dudes who come in plain white t-shirts that are big enough for a 12 year old, and these guys are average looking dudes. Sometimes they roll up their shirt to reveal a pair of bi's that my forearms could beat. Anyways, I like it when they try to do dumbell bench presses and try to be the big dog's and press the big weights. They start to press but come down about half way, and do this about 4 or 5 super fast reps, grunting the entire way. They drop the weights with a mighty crash, and look around to see if anyone was staring at their superhuman feat. I look at them, shake my head and continue with my shit. It's pointless trying to help these bro's- they're out there trying to impress other people at the gym and lack the intensity to grow. If they would ask, I would help them- but fuck 'em let them stay small. IP: Logged |
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The Ranger Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 978) |
posted April 15, 2000 02:53 PM
hahahahahahahha.....ya fuckers!!!! Good shit!!! The old gym I worked out at(before I got kicked out) had this so called instructer....weighed about 145lbs. Smart-ass little snapper-head too! I usually ask for a spot on some of the shit I do....or make them spot me. I was going to do drop sets with no rest to faliure on each set, on the lat pull machine. Not many to choose from....so I picked snapper-head....of course I get the usual lecture about form and shit from fitness guy the great....well I decided to start at 240 and drop 20lbs each set until total faliure....I began and knocked out about 6 reps, and grunted out between clenched teeth... one more! Snapper-head yells three more....wanted everyone in the gym to see him burning the big guy out....I guess I got pissed and did 1 more on my own....he then dropped into a deadlift stance and placed his fingers under the stack for forced reps. I guess I'm pretty evil....heh heh heh...yup....I did 1 forced rep....grunted that bitch out with everything I had....snapper-head starts screaming your a quitter....push it you pussy......everyone in the gym is watching by now....and this fucker is straining his balls off trying to help me get the weight up one more time....he adjusted his grip, by putting his fingers in deeper......I started up, and about halfway I let go of the bar......broke eight fingers....got kicked out of the gym, even though some Bro's stood up for me....I didn't care....never liked that little fucker anyway!!!! Ranger IP: Logged |
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E2 Moderator (Total posts: 3183) |
posted April 15, 2000 03:10 PM
HAHAHAHAHHAAH RANGER THAT'S THE BEST STORY!!! IP: Logged |
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KRKash Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 56) |
posted April 15, 2000 05:07 PM
My gym has a little dude who thinks he is the biggest motherfucker in the gym, hes 22 years old but he is only 5'4 110. This kid is louder than anyone you have ever heard when he lifts, you can hear him outside the gym.its hilarous At my school gym we have a midget who works out,which is funny alone, but one day he was doing lats and he can't reach the lat bar so he stands on seat anyway, he was reaching for the lat bar and fell off the seat. One more,this hot ass girl was doing the leg press and there wasn't to many people in the gym so it was kinda quite,anyway the girl blasted one out her ass that had to leave burn marks on the machine,one guy who kinda knew her even asked her what the sound was a s a joke and she tried to say it was the machine,then left very quickly IP: Logged |
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DRRman Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 198) |
posted April 15, 2000 05:18 PM
Well guys, i have to work out at a local YMCA, so you can just imagine what kinds of pencilneck geek fuckers come up in there. First off you have the young school kids doing everything you guys mentioned, wearing wife beaters, putting 225 on a flat bench with three people spotting and then claim they benched it. We have the fat guy who sits and i mean just sits on the seated calf raise machine for 2 hours straight every night holding a sweat towel, and he never and i mean never does a set. Next, we have three sets of FAGGOTS who come in just fucking sick me out. Then we also have those skinny ass fuckers who think they know best how to get big and are always willing to tell you how to do it. DAMMIT, i just hate some of this shit, but i guess no gym is perfect huh, Hell, i may just move to canada and go to E2's gym!!! IP: Logged |
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rocko Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 165) |
posted April 15, 2000 05:28 PM
I guess it takes all kinds to make the world go round. That is some funny shit. I once saw this one kid in my gym who thought he would lift a tone of weight and do three plates a side for shrugs. Well after doing a couple of reps, hips and legs in full force providing all the lift he racked the bar on the bottom rail of a squat rack and preceded to unload the bar. Well he started at one side removing the plates, took 1 off then the second so there were three plates on one side and only 1 plate on the other. Well as he went for the final plate on the one side you can all imagine what happened next, he pulled the plate off, the three on the other side counterballanced the bar and the empty end flew up and smacked him in the chin hard, the shock of the bar hitting him in the chin caused him to drop the plate which grated down his shins to rest on his toes. After the huge crash there he was bleeding from his shins, a plate sitting on his toes, and gushing blood from his chin with the bar standing straight up and down on the other side stuck in the three remaining plates. My first reaction was one of shock and then hysterical laughter. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Arminius Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 74) |
posted April 15, 2000 05:45 PM
I bow in awe and only hope one day I can add storys worthy... Arminius.. IP: Logged |
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THE STEEL BEAST Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 259) |
posted April 15, 2000 05:56 PM
THERE IS THIS KNOW IT ALL FORMER "BODYBUILDER" WHO SAID HE USED TO COMPETE. FUCKER IS ABOUT 40 YEARS OLD WEIGHS ABOUT 180 WITH AT LEAST 20 PERCENT BODYFAT.....FUNNY THING IS THIS...HE SAID WHEN HE COMPETED HE WAS KNOWN FOR HIS INCREDIBLE BACK. SO EVERTIME HE GOES TO THE GYM HE TRYS TO INSTRUCT ANY WHO WILL LISTEN ON HIS SECRET BACK PROGRAM...HERES THE FUNNY THING HIS SECRET BACK PROGRAM IS THIS:10 SETS OF BENDING OVER AND LIFTING THE SEATED CALF RAISE MACHINE UP AND DOWN...HE SAYS THIS IS ALL HE HAS EVER DONE FOR HIS BACK..WHAT A DUMBFUCK... IP: Logged |
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muscles2 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 163) |
posted April 15, 2000 06:02 PM
CHECK THIS OUT ONE DAY I WAS IN THE GYM AND THIS DUDE COMES IN STARTS DOING HEAVY SQUATS AND ALL OF SUDDEN BLOOD STARTS COMING OUT OF HIS EARS AND THEN HIS NOSE THIS DUDE IS LIKE THE FUCKING JUICE KING TALKED OPENLY ABOUT HOW MUCH HE WAS TAKING AND BY THE WAY WAS A FUCKING JERK ALSO. NEVER SEEN THAT BEFORE SEEN HIM THE OTHER DAY I THINK HE MIGHT WEIGH 150 PNDS NOW BUT STILL A JERK JUST NOT AS BIG OF ONE. SEE YA BRO'S IP: Logged |
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masster_blasster Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 48) |
posted April 15, 2000 06:35 PM
Great fucking stories. I have a few...... there is a guy in my gym about 5" 2' tall. He has a gut, he is whiter than a ghost, and he wears metallica t-shirts (no sleeves), bright blue spandex pants (not shorts) and some fucking sued indian moccasin boots (they go all the way up to his knees). One day he was doing some of those worthless 4" squats with about 315. I asked my friend what the fuck the hobbit was doing. My friend said that in the past he had told the guy he was doing too much weight. The hobbit told him he was a nurse and that he was doing the 4" squats to strengthen his back. What a fucking retard... Did I mention that his girlfriend is twice as big as him and consistently does more weight than he does. She is big (she was born big) I am constantly amazed at the weird shit these two do in the gym. masster blasster IP: Logged |
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Ice Man Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 291) |
posted April 15, 2000 07:08 PM
Ranger, You are my kinda guy! I hate those fuckers too. IP: Logged |
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crazy duke Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 157) |
posted April 15, 2000 07:08 PM
well i asked the owner of the gym what i could do to tone up better and his fat cousin tried to tell me some stought to do when here he is fat IP: Logged |
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big dogg Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 70) |
posted April 15, 2000 07:18 PM
Primo 57 tell that fat bitch that she's so fat you can't look anywhere without seeing her!!!! IP: Logged |
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Rich1 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 396) |
posted April 15, 2000 08:04 PM
Now I know that when were in the Gym, all of us have our reasons for being there and hopefully we'll all acheve what we came for. However, fat women who lift wieghts, like 15 lbs for sets of 5 is really funny, why they think they are going to get trim from it a is pretty pathetic notion..they ought to get on a treadmill and run till they drop... on a sad note, I saw some old guy the other day who really was a call to stay in shape and NOT smoke, he was working out on some really light resistance machines and he's got this bottle of oxygen on a little cart he drags around, hooked up to a tube running to his nose, how sad he didn't try sooner... a call to all to stay fit and work out regularly! IP: Logged |
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big dogg Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 70) |
posted April 15, 2000 08:10 PM
True, it's sad that he smokes, but there are plenty of people that hurt their bodies worst because of uneducated steroid use. I know a guys that started his first cycle but didn't even know what he was taking! We try to fit this "perfect" image! Women get implants, we take gear. End of the story! what a world..... IP: Logged |
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david3 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 213) |
posted April 15, 2000 09:40 PM
DAMM GUYS THESE ARE THE FUNNIEST STORIES I HAVE EVER HEARD. PRIMO 57 I KNOW THE FAT BITCH U ARE TALKING ABOUT IN SCHOOL SHE SAT NEXT TO EVERYBODY IN THE CLASS SHE WAS SO BIG. AND AS FAR AS THE FAGS GO IF THE SICK FUCKS WANT TO TAKE AND GIVE IT UP THE ASS FINE BY ME BUT STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM THE YOUNG BOYS U PERVERTS SEEM TO TRY AND RECRUIT TO YOUR SICK WORLD. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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BIG RICK ROCK Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 343) |
posted April 15, 2000 11:45 PM
Well guys I have a shit load of funny ass storys, but since this great post was burried in this part of the bord never to be seen againg, I'm not even gonna make the effort of writing them. IP: Logged |
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hardness Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 128) |
posted April 16, 2000 02:36 AM
We had a Guy in training legs. he had 7 /20kg plates on each side of the bar. Squatted them no problem. He worked out like an animal. The he proceeded to put his weights away. All we heard was a massive BANG !. The dick head unloaded all the plates from one side and wondered why there was a hole in the floor. Again someone Squatting. What is it about Squatting that does your head in ???????. IP: Logged |
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jared Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 35) |
posted April 16, 2000 04:45 AM
one day i was waiting for a guy to finish with squat rack as he told me there was one more set to do. he asked me for a spot and i obliged. the bar was loaded with 295 and he was psyching himself up, screaming loudly the guy was really thin, so thin in fatc that he could have had flies around his head. anyway, the guy starts doing the squats, going down about six inches and the screaming gets louder. he does about four reps racks the weight and asked me if i had any questions. i asked him if it was a boy or a girl and he was not amused. IP: Logged |
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Karate guy Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 314) |
posted April 16, 2000 02:56 PM
My buddy's washing his hands in the bathroom and he hears a guy behind him clearing his throat so he turns around and its the local homo buck naked(this was at the gym)tellin my buddy"do you feel a cold breeze in here, I feel a cold draft" What the hell! LOL Then the homo guy's prancin around the bathroom all naked. What a fag! LOL IP: Logged |
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studcj Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 914) |
posted April 16, 2000 06:35 PM
Damn Ranger, Like my man Mohammed Ali said....you're "a baaaaaad maan!" I hope you don't have any kids. hehe.... ------------------ IP: Logged |
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BiffBoom Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 421) |
posted April 16, 2000 07:50 PM
Here's my "gerbiler"...one morning at the gym..this 130lb jerk comes into the weight room wearing those full length spandex bicycling pants. I'm standing in the squat rack kind of watching my form in the mirror. As this jerk walks by..I kind of glance at him to try and figure out what the fuck he's wearing when I spot ...mister tee-pee. The guy has this huge point in his pants and everyone noticed it. So the guy goes over to the leg press sled and whips off a quick set. As he stands up..my bud notices a bulge in the guys pants at his knee cap..IT WAS HIS PROSTHECTIC DICK. So this jerk is walking around the gym with some rubber thing in his spandex pants and it had fallen down to his knee caps..most hilarious thing I have ever seen...from our "gerbiler" IP: Logged |
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Capt'n_Crunch Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 423) |
posted April 17, 2000 06:58 AM
When I was 17 and first started working out, me and my best friend decided to take our other friend with us to the gym. The guy had never worked out in his life. We get him going on some exercises....finally we get to decline bench press and we tell him to be careful when he gets the bar off the rack because of the strange position your in (you guys know what Im talking about) well I guess the dumbnut didnt believe us but as soon as he picked the bar off the rack..BLING.. I was on the other side of the gym and turned around to see what had happened and what do I see.....this fool laying there with the bar sitting across his forehead. He couldnt get the bar off and my best friend who had been spotting him laughed so hard he fell on the floor and couldnt help him. I run over and look at the guy and see this puppy dog expression on his face like he is going to cry and I started out laughing....poor guy layed there five minutes straight with a barbell sittin across his forehead and wimpering IP: Logged |
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NCLifter Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 12) |
posted April 17, 2000 03:41 PM
When I was 18, I got a job as a trainer at powerhouse gym for a free memebership. There were these two fags, one black, one white, that worked out together that were fucking huge. I swear one guy looked like Lee Haney. They were both juiced to the gills. I was about 5'9" 160 lbs natural. The guys were nice and asked me to spot them a few times. One day I was in the locker room putting on my shoes when someone says "hello, buddy" I look up and that 260 lb, fag is standing there with his towel around his shoulders buck naked. I swear his dick was 6 inches from my face. I backed up so fast I fell off the damn bench. I tried to play it off and said hi, then I threw on my shoe and ran out. NC IP: Logged |
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Karate guy Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 314) |
posted April 18, 2000 11:05 AM
NC, that was a horror show man. You shoulda maced him and wacked him with a plate.LOL IP: Logged |
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weez Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 98) |
posted April 18, 2000 02:06 PM
Not crazy, but funny. One day my partner went upstairs to the cardio section of my gym after our workout (which by the way was just redone...painted, etc). It was off hours so was very empty. I was finishing up my workout, when I heard a loud crash. Shortly there after, my partner comes limping down the steps. Apparently, he totally zoned out on the tread mill while running pretty fast, misplaced his foot off of the belt, which set him falling (and flailing). Given he was a pretty light guy and the speed of the belt, it shot him off the treadmill and into the wall where he put a hugh hole in it about the size of his upperbody. Not only that the belt sandpapered his head, arms, and knees. He looked like he just just his ass kicked. If only I could have seen it happen, but just seeing him all banged up and hearing the story was funny enough. IP: Logged |
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scott825 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 210) |
posted April 18, 2000 06:18 PM
There use to be this middle aged guy that came in my gym that use to crack us all up. He would hook a staight bar up to the bottom of the cable machine get in his perfect stance take the perfect 2 handed grip with his pinky locked in with his pointing finger and then proceed to swing the bar like it was a golf club.Maybe he thoght that was how Tiger Woods got such long drive. IP: Logged |
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tray renfro Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 537) |
posted April 18, 2000 07:10 PM
LOL...holy shit, ive never see to much funny shit at my gym. these stories are great. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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BIGBADFKR Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 243) |
posted April 18, 2000 10:00 PM
THATS FUNNY SHIT IP: Logged |
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StevieD Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 128) |
posted April 19, 2000 09:10 AM
This happened to me and even I had to laugh (later). I was doing seated shoulder pressing with db's. I was forcing out the last couple of reps with my partner spotting. The gym owner complains if you drop heavy weights because it knocks the paint off the ceiling in the reception below. So as not to piss the owner off I decided not to drop the weights on the floor - instead I let the weights drop (controlled) to my thighs. Unfortunately my legs had open whilst in the throws of trying forcing out my last rep and - you've guessed it - one of the db's swung straight down into my balls. The major problem was that my scrotum got trapped between the weight and the seat! Luckliy it didn't crush my bollock but it did cause a nasty graze! Blood in my shorts and it stung like hell when I had a shower. What did my partner do? Laughed his head off! - what are partners for though? IP: Logged |
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RedHot Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 81) |
posted April 24, 2000 01:03 AM
A man was running on the tredmill in the gym and had been running atleast 30 minutes. He got interested in what was on the TV and stepped of track. The tradmill threw him off and yanked the headphones off his head and he got tangled up in them because they were still plugged into the treadmill. Laughed my ass off (quietly). He got back on and acted as if nothing had ever happened. Oh did I mention he had on runner shorts that were very short and when he fell backwards on his ass I got the full view of the "privates". IP: Logged |
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Curious Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 134) |
posted April 24, 2000 11:36 AM
I see the funniest thing I've ever seen in a gym every day. We have these three guys that come in that we lovingly call "The Butt-Pirates". Their leader who gives them all advice(bad advice I might add) is 6'3" and pushing 160. His other friends are really overweight. The tall one will put 185 on the bench press and have his friends stand at each end of the bar to spot him and then just after screaming weird shit will try to lift it. The two guys at the end do most of the work. He will then jump up as high as he can off of the bench and then run into the corner and shadow box with it for a minute. It's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever seen. I got the greatest joy ever when one day he jumped too high and dislodged one of the tiles in the ceiling. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Frackal Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 175) |
posted April 24, 2000 07:53 PM
There used to be this guy at my gym that would come in in the morning with his newspaper and coffee, and go straight to the seated hamstring curl machine. The kicker is that he would just put his feet up on it like it was a fukin' reclining chair!!! He'd sit there for like 1/2 an hour at a time and then leave!!! Guess he felt better being lazy at the gym rather than at home... IP: Logged |
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Rich1 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 396) |
posted April 27, 2000 11:31 AM
Really over wieght people, now don't get me wrong we're all there cuz we need to be and our goals are different, but some of them waited too long to do anything about it and now they are really unhealthy pasty looking people who look like there gonna die on their treadmills, steper's, what have you. Now all the little anorexics are on the other end of the scale, I have this gal I see at my gym a couple of times a week trying to run off the 2 lbs of BF she has left, I mean she is so thin it's hard to look at her, she should be lifting and eating, not running forever. Why do the people let them selves go this far is beyond me. I have my own troubles but being fat and really thin is not one of them. IP: Logged |
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FlexB Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 192) |
posted April 27, 2000 12:15 PM
This is some of the funniest shit I ever heard!!!! You guys are a trip. I'mm reading this shit at work and laughing my ass off!! Everyone in the office is just staring at me wondering what the fuck is going on!! I don't really have any funny stories(yet). There is this one fat bitch that works out at my gym every day and she literally scares the shit out of me and my training partner! We try desperatly not to catch eye contact with Orka. One day she was doing that "sneak a peak" exercise, you know....the leg abductor machine. We were doing calf raises on the machine right across from her. She was wearing some light gray biking shorts that day (I swear every time she walked, it looked like two midgets were wrestling in her shorts). My buddy kind of glanced over at her and yelled out a loud "Oh my God...that's disgusting". I asked him what was up. He proceeded to tell me that Free Willy had a gigantic wet spot in between her thighs and he saw the whole thing!!!!! I gagged so hard I had to leave th gym for awhile to get my composure back!! That's fucking nasty man!! ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Capt'n_Crunch Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 423) |
posted April 27, 2000 12:30 PM
OH GOD thats nasty Flex!!!!!! thats one I wish you had kept.....LOL IP: Logged |
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Twisted_Steel Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 83) |
posted April 27, 2000 03:32 PM
Edited [This message has been edited by George Spellwin (edited May 02, 2000).] IP: Logged |
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FlexB Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 192) |
posted April 27, 2000 06:00 PM
That was funny......but you could have kept the "negro" remark. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Twisted_Steel Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 83) |
posted April 27, 2000 06:12 PM
Twisted, Please do not bash gays and lesbians here. You are entitled to your opinion, but everyone is welcome here. George [This message has been edited by George Spellwin (edited May 04, 2000).] IP: Logged |
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FlexB Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 192) |
posted April 27, 2000 06:27 PM
Any color queer is a nasty sight!!!! ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Pokemon Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 97) |
posted April 29, 2000 01:39 PM
i had sex with a girlfriend in the steam room on a friday night. IP: Logged |
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MaxMuscle Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 26) |
posted April 29, 2000 02:51 PM
One time this huge guy comes into the gym and this guy is really massive. He looked kind of sick. He was sweating and breathing heavy. He went to the squat rack and started squatting. On his last set there was 5 plates on each end and when he went down to squat he ripped one. It was so gross. You could smell it a mile away. Everyone was laughing at him. And he put bar back on the rack and he started walking very fast towards the bathroom. That's when I notice that the guy shit his pants. Maybe he had stomach problems from creatine, but I don't know...but I gotta that was pretty funny. IP: Logged |
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MrMuscle Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 294) |
posted April 30, 2000 12:48 PM
unfortnately the craziest thing ive seen in my gym something that happend to me. I was alone in the gym..which i for some reason often are. And i was doing seated military presses. And i guess i wasnt paying enough attention, cuz i rammed the bar up my nose. i started bleeding like hell, but i tough "Damn, i have to finish my set". So i did, blowing blood all over the mirror, florr, my vlothes..damn..so when i went in to the locker room to wash it all of i looked like i had been to war... u can still se some of the blood on the wall..now that is how hardcore gym should look like..all bloody and stuff... IP: Logged |
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Twisted_Steel Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 83) |
posted May 02, 2000 11:21 PM
BUMP IP: Logged |
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MrMuscle Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 294) |
posted May 03, 2000 04:51 AM
BUMP it is IP: Logged |
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NEWMAXX Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 133) |
posted May 03, 2000 11:13 PM
The best is the "clam" machine they put th einner and outer thigh (clam) machines right outside the locker room. you cant help but be involuntarily drawn the the site...the towel goes quickly over the er ah ..clam..and your busted..I try not too but every dude does it you would think they would move it... I have started naming the various species.. The dusty clam .. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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INTENSE Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 15) |
posted May 04, 2000 12:06 PM
I once saw this semi-retarded kid try to bench with an ez-curl bar. He had, in random order, 5lb plates and 2 1/2lb plates on both sides. one side was 32lbs and the other was 37 1/2lbs. he started pressing them and it started tipping over, the dumb ass dumped all the plates everywhere! IP: Logged |
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conan69 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 993) |
posted May 04, 2000 06:56 PM
Ranger you are awesome ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Twisted_Steel Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 83) |
posted May 04, 2000 09:49 PM
Sorry, I sometimes forget that I must be sensative careing and compassionate to all persons. Including the homosexual community. However, I dont suspect my opinions or my rather humerous story deviates from the common conception of homosexuals among the hetrosexual bb community. My appologies, Gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg IP: Logged |
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batman Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 76) |
posted May 22, 2000 02:22 AM
Last week I say this tink in the Gym we call Hedge Hog because he's a clone of RON JEREMY. Anyway he was doing Jefferson squats supersetted with Jump Squats, yelling on every rep like he was taking a dump. Guy walks around with fucking leg warmers on. IP: Logged |
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PeteyPete Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 22) |
posted May 22, 2000 02:41 AM
I have to share this one because this will make you think twice about your workout parners, A couple years ago i was working out with a bunch of friends in my buddies basement, basically we were all trying to show who was strongest bencher (typical teenage testosterone shit) when one of my pussy friends decided he had to show everyone up, he put like 150 pounds on and was screaming out every rep, my other friend got so frustrated with his shitty ass attitude that when he finally need a spot he would get him back, and he did, he had the weight on his chest and was struggling, my other friend then proceeded to "dick face" him, he took his dick out and slapped him in the face with it, the rest of us almost died in laughter, even years later i still can't think about it without laughing, IP: Logged |
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Austin316 Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 32) |
posted May 24, 2000 12:41 AM
LOL, that is some fucked up shit, I'd have gone after the guys throat IP: Logged |
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Bunny55 Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 61) |
posted May 26, 2000 04:25 PM
My fav is when the little teen age football players are acting all bad in the gym. Here I am some old broad in big sweats. I go there to work, not to look good. Then they leg press, and I have to add weights to do my leg presses. They just stare. I just keep working. Once they got all cocky about arms and how cut they were. (Not) so I took off my sweat top when I was about a week out from competition last november - (had a little spandex top on under) They have since decided the old broad is Ok to work out with. Bunny IP: Logged |
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GOWZER Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 137) |
posted May 26, 2000 06:24 PM
once i was doing bent over barbell rows early in the morning ,and i thought the gym was empty.i had some beans the night before and my stomache felt a little funny,on my second set i started knockin gas out my ass with each rep ,the farts sounded like i was starting up a motorcycle and they smelled worse than a porta potty in wood stock.any ways i didnt care cause i thought i was alone .when i was done with my set i let out a last fart and turned around ,to my horror there were a group of hot girls standing by the treadmills staring at me with a look of disgust.needless to say that was my last set that morning.... [This message has been edited by GOWZER (edited May 26, 2000).] IP: Logged |
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GOWZER Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 137) |
posted May 26, 2000 10:39 PM
this is the funnyiest isht on the board.. IP: Logged |
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Capt'n_Crunch Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 423) |
posted May 26, 2000 11:02 PM
Oh SHIT Gowzer , thats fuckin funny as hell LMAO IP: Logged |
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CHUCK U FARLEY Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 6) |
posted May 27, 2000 01:51 AM
this chick was on the bench and her boyfriend was holding her knees down during her sets. she was wearing very short shorts and the dude noticed a loose string hanging from them. being a nice guy he tried to fix her shorts and pulled the string. to his surprise he was left holding a bloody tampon in the middle of the gym. just shows you, dont yank on the vampire tea bags IP: Logged |
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