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 Elite Fitness Bodybuilding, Anabolics, Diet, Life Extension, Wellness, Supplements, and Training Boards
 Chat & Conversation
 MAY1010 IS MOVING ... TO A CITY NEAR YOU?
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| Author | Topic: MAY1010 IS MOVING ... TO A CITY NEAR YOU? | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder 
Posts: 1481 |
As you may remember, I got fired last Tuesday. I've decided to pick up stakes and leave San Francisco. Heading to Las Vegas. Except for my brother (in Los Angeles), my whole family is there. I'm in the process of packing up my apartment. Jesus! I didn't know I had so much crap! Here's my problem: I'm not out to my family. Any thoughts? ------------------     | ||
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Freak 
Posts: 1851 |
Don't tell them, i am sure this will cause some turmoil that you don't need right now. Wait till you have control of your life again. ------------------ | ||
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Guru 
Posts: 4812 |
Damn May, thats tough, well I dont know whats best I imagine it would be better for them to know upfront then to find out themselves in a awkward circumstance. If you can keep it in yer pants (or at least not get caught) I wouldn't say anything yet. That must be a bitch. ------------------ For a good time click here: Search and Profiles (300Kleens Board) | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1473 |
I would be honest and open as soon as you can, this will make things MUCH EASIER in the long run... What if you meet someone, what if they're somehow connected to a family member, etc., etc. Good luck to you, I might hit you up for a place to stay when I turn 21, I can't wait to hit the blackjack tables... And hey, if there's an EliteFitness get-together at the Mr. O next year...PARTY AT MAY'S HOUSE, hehe... ------------------ | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1481 |
I can't believe it! MP5 and Slopain can be empathetic. Who knew?
I have no problem in telling my siblings, in fact, I think I'd probably enjoy it. But, my folks are in their 60s and I know how they'd feel. They wouldn't reject me, but it would create some stress. At their age, I see no reason to put it in their face. I think I'll just be quiet about it. If they ask me (which they would never), I figure if they're prepared to ask the question, I'm prepared to answer it honestly. ------------------ | ||
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Moderator
Posts: 4039 |
So you are going to Vegas? you have a job there now? | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1394 |
what is your family's take on gays? do you have any brothers or sisters? | ||
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Freak
Posts: 1628 |
Vegas baby Vegas, your so money you don't even know it. ------------------ | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1394 |
nevermind | ||
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Moderator
Posts: 4039 |
I think it's best that you tell them, but get settled in your new job, and apartment first like the others said. I imagine they will take it ok. | ||
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Freak
Posts: 1547 |
May-on a serious note, wait till you're settled in. But, u never know how they'll react. I acted really cool and understanding when my brother told me. That's not what u'd expect from a big Texan marine....you never know. | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1481 |
My family's take on gays? Well, my dad once said that if he ever had homosexual urges, he'd have an operation. In his defense, I was just about to out myself to him one night, he knew it, and he panicked and made that remark. He's a bit more sophisticated than that. My sister works with this gay guy and they've become friends. But whenever she refers to him, she says, "John, you know, my gay friend" ... What can I say? They're my family ... and I love them more than anything. But, we're a good Catholic family and until the Pope says its okay, it's not. No, I don't have a job there. I'm going to take at least a month or two before I even begin looking. I'm going to try to stay in the same line of work. I've spent a lot of years building a career and I don't want to wipe out all my hard work. I had planned on going to Los Angeles but my dad has lured me to Las Vegas by offering to help my buy a new home. He's been trying to bribe me with this for several years. As I'm not getting any younger, I've decided to take him up on the offer. I'd never be able to buy one here in San Francisco. I'm lucky in that I've got only myself to support. If I'm not happy in Las Vegas, I can always move. But, I'm really looking forward to being near my family again. It's been over 10 years since I didn't have to get on a plane to go visit them. ------------------ | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder 
Posts: 50 |
May, You've hit the nail on the head when you say that the family probably know already. My mother "knows", but we've never discussed it. Sometimes she has bent over backwards to provide opportunities to let me out myself to her: "The gay next-door-neighbours (now shifted) are so nice, I'd love you to meet them." "Did you happen to see the Mardi Gras Parade when you were in Sydney?", etc,etc. She must wonder how come I always manage to be in Sydney when Mardi Gras is on. I don't want to rub salt into the wound, but I have to go to work, otherwise I would like to write longer. Hope things look up. You sound brighter already. BTW, which one of the two of us will be the first to tell the family? I don't think it needs to be rushed,however. | ||
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Cool Novice 
Posts: 30 |
May, My two cents on telling your family is that if you do decide to tell them,timing is everything and Mama knows her children. I'm sure she has an idea that you may be gay. Then again, what they don't know won't hurt them. Assuming is not knowing. | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder 
Posts: 307 |
If you need a job I might be able to pull some strings at CHeetas strip club? You could bounce. Let me know | ||
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Cool Novice
Posts: 45 |
may.. i know this is off the subject.. but glad to have u back on the board.. kinda weird but i missed ur post... and whatever u do with your family.. just remember to be true to yourself.. do that and everything will be fine.. ur great person u have nothing to worry about. take care MF | ||
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Guru
Posts: 3404 |
May, if they cant tell your a little lite in your loafers then slap me silly. You spell Gay, I'm suprised your shit isnt the color of the rainbow. If they cant accept you then they need to look at the definition of family. peace and good luck with this situation ------------------ | ||
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Guru
Posts: 2346 |
Ok May I'm an asshole and all - some call me heartless. I just I don't think you need this kinda of stuff on a new start. I remember the x-mas story and well your life is just that. Your life. You don't have to share all of it with them. Just do what you do and let it ride. I don't think that at least till you get things settled I would tell them. Just find a way to leave it be. Sorry to hear about your job. Hope things get better. ?? When is it your turn to be santa - I hope next year!!!!! | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 72 |
May-- Steak Helmet's lead sounds like a good start. Weren't you the one who told me recently he always wanted to be a bouncer at a strip club? You might also check with The Saint -- a good guy w/ the right connections. | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1481 |
Just for shits and giggles, I checked out the gay personal ads in Las Vegas. I guess I wanted to see what the guys down there looked like. I had a theory that every city town has plenty of good looking people but Las Vegas seems to be the exception. I looked at about 50 pictures of gay guys there and all I can say is that Las Vegas is definitely not the land of beautiful people. I'm now thoroughly depressed! ------------------ | ||
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Moderator
Posts: 4039 |
or they don't place personal ads. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 130 |
Holy Shit- I missed that you lost your job! How did I miss that? Sorry! May,I am a mother myself, and a Catholic! I could never NOT love my child! NO POPE or another person could ever change my feelings for my child-EVER! | ||
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Freak
Posts: 1947 |
I am SURE your family already knows. No surprise there. But why decide to move from San Fran just because you got fired? It seems you loved the city. Why not stay and take another job and continue being May1010? | ||
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Guru
Posts: 3016 |
Good luck in vegas bro. Maybe you could become and Elvis Impersonator!! | ||
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Freak
Posts: 1947 |
Vegas is sooooo... artificial. And Plastic. Like May said, I failed to see any pretty people there when I was there. The town collects ugly people it seems. | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 352 |
May, I know what it's like to come out in a religious family. When I told my parents, my father quoted the last line of Psalm 145 ("God preserves all those who love him, but all the wicked he destroys" -- guess which one he thought I was?) and then refused to speak to me for a year. He even hung up on me when I called him on father's day (he didn't want to acknowledge me as a son). But eventually, he came around and said that he had even suspected it. Then, last week he came to visit and he asked me why I didn't have a boyfriend (like I needed the guilt!). The point is that there will never be a "right time" to come out. Whenever you do it, it will be a painful, difficult process for both you and your family, but ultimately it will bring you closer together. You can't hope to have a meaningful relationship if it is based on a lie. Being gay is a part of who you are (and from what I can tell on this board, in your case it is a BIG part  ). Not coming out to them is tantamount to not being yourself with your own family. Isn't that the point of going home in the first place?I'm not saying that you should come out immediately � that's up to you. I'm just saying that there will never be a "perfect moment" to do it. Best of luck. By the way, I'm glad you're moving east, who knows, if the trend continues maybe you'll make it to my neck of the woods! | ||
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Moderator
Posts: 4039 |
and where are you from latona? | ||
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Guru
Posts: 4812 |
LAs Vegas has many beutifull people, problem is they stay for 2 days then leave for 5 months. Its all hookup material not relationship material. Model looking 20 year olds with 60-70 year old millionaires (many times over). When I play craps youll see one of these freaks shows, the girls are easy to hookup with but only after gramps lays downs for the night. ------------------ For a good time click here: Search and Profiles (300Kleens Board) | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 352 |
To paraphrase Shakespeare: I'm from: Did I mention that we got 8 inches of snow last night? | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 352 |
PS. Johnny, you're welcome to come visit too! wink, wink. | ||
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Pro Bodybuilder
Posts: 367 |
I hope you can get your unemployment, the basards always try to screw people, the employer that is. Just a thought as I have been through this before. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 263 |
May, similar story here. I lived in SF for 10 years and loved it. But you're right about never being able to buy a house there. And missing family. There will always be a soft spot in my heart for San Francisco, but I don't regret leaving. Advice on dealing with the relatives: | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 72 |
If you think you might be asking your family for financial help in the near future, why would you want to come out to them now -- Especially since you just told them that you lost you job & this might be interpreted as "another piece of bad news"? It's a very personal decision that depends a lot on the personalities involved, but, if it were my parents, I would wait until a more stable time and a time when they didn't have bargaining power over me. [This message has been edited by 401 (edited February 06, 2001).] | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1481 |
401 - What's up? Did you give yourself your own shot? How's that going?
I haven't had any financial assistance from my folks since I was in graduate school, about 10 years ago. Although they've told me I can count on them for financial assistance, it shouldn't be necessary. Nice to know however that they'd be there for me. My dad, however, is going to finance a new house for me. But, that's only once I settle in and make sure that I like Vegas well enough to stay. ------------------ | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 72 |
That sounds good. I'd still hold off for a little bit. No problem with the primo (thanks again). But the dbol's submerging my cheekbones (pat. pending) under a nasty layer of fat. Not attractive. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 50 |
May, ar anyone else.... Have you been to any of the San Francisco street fairs - Folsom St, Dore St or whatever? If I ever get over I'd like to fit something like that into my itinerary. Any other events to recommend - there or anywhere else? I would like to be somewhere where you can see things that are really freaky, sleazy and out of the mainstream. | ||
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Amateur Bodybuilder
Posts: 72 |
If you're a 45-year hairy man who wears his pot belly like a badge of honor, then the Folsom Street Fair is the place for you. | ||
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Elite Bodybuilder
Posts: 1481 |
If you visit San Francisco, you'll want to come during the following: 1. Halloween (be sure to attend the Hell Ball - I've hosted that a few times. Great circuit event.) 2. Folsom Street Fair - the leather crowd ... quite fun and wild and fun! 3. Dore Alley Street Fair - if you're into guys performing ws on the street, this is the event for you! 4. Also, the Castro Street Fair is the week-end after Folsom Street Fair.
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posted February 05, 2001 07:21 PM
