Mr. Garrison: Now, pay attention!

Ahem! ... I heard there is no Christmas in the silly Middle East!
No trees! No snow!
No Santa Clause!
They have different religious beliefs!
They believe in Muhahmad and not in our holiday!
And so, every December, I go to the Middle East and say!

Hey there, Mr. Muslim, Merry Fuckin' Christmas!
Put down that book, the Koran, and hear some holiday wishes!
In case you haven't noticed, it's Jesus's birthday!
So get off your heathen Muslim ass and fuckin' celebrate!

There is no holiday season in India, I've heard!
They don't hang up their stockings, and that is just absurd!
They've never read a Christmas story!
They don't know what Rudolph is about!
And that is why, in December, I'll go to India and shout!

Hey there, Mr. Hinduist, Merry Fuckin' Christmas!
Drink egg nog and eat some beef and pass it to the Mrs.!
In case you haven't noticed, it's Jesus's birthday!
So get off your heathen Hindu ass and fuckin' celebrate!

Now, I heard that in Japan, Everyone just lives in sin!
They pray to several gods and put needles in their skin!
On December 25th, all they do is eat a cake!
And that is why I go to Japan and walk around and say!
Hey there, Mr. Shintoist, Merry Fuckin' Christmas!
God is gonna kick your ass, you infidelic pagan scum!
In case you haven't noticed, there's festive things to do!
So let's all rejoice for Jesus!
Merry Fuckin' Christmas to you!

On Christmas day, I travel 'round the world! Taoists, Krushnas, Buddhists, and all you atheists too,
Merry Fuckin' Christmas to you!

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EX SCIENTIA TRIDENS - From Knowledge Seapower http://www.geocities.com/allykat_chic

[This message has been edited by Sailor_Girl (edited December 25, 2000).]