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 Different Protein fart techniques you can use against the squids at your gym.
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| Author | Topic: Different Protein fart techniques you can use against the squids at your gym. |
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ASSFACE Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 56) |
posted February 14, 2000 04:46 PM
  
OK, OK, ASSFACE understands we all have the same things we hate at the gym , mattskywalker said it best - until one of us opens a gym and only board members go, we have to deal with it. ASSFACE says we can also deal with it, but we dont have to deal with it sitting down!!. THIS IS the reason ASSFACE has developed these strategies of dropping protein farts and stinky bombs in and around the geeks, stickboys, cousin franky's, tina corolla's, carolyn cameltoe's, and dumbbell dipshits at your very own gym!! THE HIT AND RUN - effective, and you can laugh about it from a safe distance. Walk by them during their set, drop your protein fart, run away. Watch them cringe 15-20 seconds later. THE YEAH I DID THAT - when squidly hops in front of your mirror, drop your bomb and sit there staring at 'em. They will cringe and then you can say"Yeah, I did That! THE UPPER DECK- effective against douchebag gym owners and their little cousin Franky who works behind the desk - only works on toilets with a water tank on top. Close stall door - take of water tank lid - drop you stinky bomb in the tank - put the lid back on. By the time they realize where the smell is coming from - they have a water tank full of stew on their hands. THE STINK PLATE - also effective against douchebag gym owners -in your home - pack a paper plate and saran wrap in your gym back. Go to the gym. In the locker room, hit a stall and crap on the plate. Cover it with saran wrap. No make sure no one sees you, put the plate in a locker and lock it. Flush the key down the toilet. stink plate in the house. THE CLUSTER BOMB- have your trainging buddies eat some beans and rice before the gym. Throw in some cheerios for good measure - with your training buddies in tow, you can drop a string of protein farts in a hit and run fashion anywhere in the gym. THE YOU THINK ITS THERE STINK BOMB - when you see squidly coming towards the water fountain, beat him there, take your drink, squeeze out a nice protein fart, then run away. Squidly then steps up to the fountain, and the people in line behind him thinks its his stink! THE AEROBIC BOMB - usually the aerobic areas have fans blowing all around. In this area, go up wind of the person who is your target. Let er rip and the fan powered protein fart drifts there way. Very effective against the cell phone runners as they arent paying any attention to whats going on. They tlak, talk, and then cringe as the waft of decaying myoplex enters their nostrils. ASSFACE HAS FUN AT THE GYM. NEXT TIME YOU FIND YOURSELF STANDING IN A HAZE OF PROTEIN FART, CHANCES ARE IT BY SOMEONE USING ONE OF THESE TECHNIQUES. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Rock_Man Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 150) |
posted February 14, 2000 04:57 PM
hehehe.. ASSFACE you are too much! hehehe ------------------ IP: Logged |
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MattTheSkywalker Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 189) |
posted February 14, 2000 05:05 PM
AssFace, That's f**kin hilarious. My favorite is the "Yeah I did that", it tends to get squiddy out of there pretty quick. I am also gifted at the "Hit and Run" - or sometimes I combine that with the "yeah I did that": I beat the squid to the fountain, and then because I have to lean over to get a drink, I unleash it on him and take an extra long drink. My gym owner is an OK guy though....it's a lot of the members I can't stand, so I'm going to hold off on the stinkplates for now. Later Matt IP: Logged |
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TxCollegeguy Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 126) |
posted February 14, 2000 05:20 PM
That is damn Funny...AssFace once again you have come up with some hilarious comedy that everyone here can relate to... IP: Logged |
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DianaBallBusta Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 196) |
posted February 14, 2000 05:23 PM
ASSFACE that is some funny shit. My fav is the UPPER DECK. I don't know about the STINK PLATE man...thats pretty severe!! IP: Logged |
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E2 Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 624) |
posted February 14, 2000 05:40 PM
ASSFACE you're the funniest bro. Now at least i don't have to hit the abs today IP: Logged |
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tray renfro Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 190) |
posted February 14, 2000 06:55 PM
khule! ------------------ IP: Logged |
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studcj Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 147) |
posted February 14, 2000 07:25 PM
You gross me out and make me laugh at the same time.COOL! ------------------ IP: Logged |
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chestyII Pro Bodybuilder (Total posts: 114) |
posted February 14, 2000 07:28 PM
Pretty freakin' hilarious. Try the sbd it is an olde but goodie. I have killed many an enemy with this one. Also, if you eat about a dozen dessicated liver pills the night before, and then go to the gym...I cleared a classroom in college during a test once with those liver farts. chesty IP: Logged |
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nbk Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 62) |
posted February 14, 2000 07:38 PM
When did you say you were running for presicent?????? IP: Logged |
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BIGBADFKR Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 12) |
posted February 14, 2000 07:41 PM
kool man IP: Logged |
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ASSFACE Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 56) |
posted February 15, 2000 07:54 AM
thanks, Old Boy 'Face almost forgot about the silent but deadly. Ill have to take that tip on the liver pills(why do you take those?). THE SILENT BUT DEADLY, SOMETIMES CALLED A GHOST BOMB - I have no information of this type of protein bomb, it simply starts to stink. You never know where it came from, who did it, or when it happened, even if you are the one who dropped it. Works excellent in combination with THE HIT AND RUN. GROWTH MUST BE FORCED. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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Ripper Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 40) |
posted February 15, 2000 11:55 AM
ASSFACE you're killing me....you're the funniest IRONBRO here....keep up the good work dude.... IP: Logged |
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ASSFACE Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 56) |
posted February 16, 2000 09:09 AM
ALso, if you fart at the bottom of a squat, its like a little rocket that shoots the wieght up!!! TRY IT!!!! If your dont fall over laughing, Old Boy 'Face gives you a HELL YEAH!! ------------------ IP: Logged |
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