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 The Latest and Greatest info from a 16 year trainging vet
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| Author | Topic: The Latest and Greatest info from a 16 year trainging vet |
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ASSFACE Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 8) |
posted February 08, 2000 02:11 PM
  
'Face has returned to issue his latest, greatest, and I do mean greatest, list of things you do in the gym that will jack you up with injuries!!!! Injures=No Gym Time=Scrawny, weak , and spending the whole rest of your life knowing you could have been 1 week bigger but had to take time off because you got hurt. 10. Bouncing the weight off your chest during a bench. It might take months, but your shoulders will give out, eventually. 9. Squatting like an asshole. This includes all of you with the two inch range of motion who use my power rack. 8. Leg Pressing Like an asshole - see above. 7. Benching, behind the neck pressing, and squatting without a spotter. Hey big boy, sooner or later you get stuck, and tear a muscle/disc/rotator rocking the barbell off your chest/back/head. 6. Overtraining. Even Big Bad Bill Kazmaier once said, "Give it your all, but leave the gym feeling like you had one more rep in you" . 5. WHen you try a new lift or new form, lighten the load until you know what you are doing. ASSFACE has witnessed too many clowns power clean themselves into a pair a sprained wrists. 4. If you are going to ask that big motherfucker a question about training, wait until they are in between sets, and then ask if they can give you five minutes of advice at the end of THEIR workout!! If they will help then, they will. At least they know you respect their training and knowledge, and they probably will help. ASSFACE does not need to explain what happens when some jabroni asks BIG MIKE how to bench when BIG MIKE is going for his 5th rep of benching 5 bills. Injury may result. 3. Dont favor bodyparts. Favoring results in imbalance, resulting in injury, resulting in ASSFACE getting one week bigger than you are! HAHAH Stickboy 2. DOnt look at the silicon injected stripped on the stairmaster while you spot your buddy on the incline bench. The stripper will think you are a jabroni for not helping you buddy get 275lbs off his neck. Then your buddy gets the girl because once you pull the weight off, he gets up and INJURES YOU, catches the stripper looking at him, and bangs her in the locker room. 1. Dont ever, and ASSFACE means ever, gear or no gear, think you can get bigger and stronger while you train like an idiot. ASSFACE HAS SPOKEN. Now I must go to the gym and do my squats to the floor until I vomit on some jabroni doing tricep kickbacks. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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DianaBallBusta Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 45) |
posted February 08, 2000 04:39 PM
ASSFACE man...are you a prophet or something? Good list bro...good laughs! IP: Logged |
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superB Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 5) |
posted February 08, 2000 04:48 PM
Keep 'em comin Assface, great shit. IP: Logged |
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devrimbal Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 24) |
posted February 08, 2000 05:08 PM
Hey ASSFACE I got something to tell you. F U C K Y O U, M O T H E R F U C K E R! I got a problem with #7. I got no spotter, I got no time to get a training partner or money for a trainer. And I'm jealous of you mother fuckers with training partners or spotters. Have you ever tried to bench alone to the point where you exhaust your self and squeze one more rep but the mother fucking bar won't move higher than 3inches and you're in a suspended animation about to shit in your pants while the girls are watching you in the gym. The fear takes over and makes you push the bar in the hook. It happens to me often. Sometimes it just isn't enough though, and I collapse the bar on my chest, roll it towards my stomach and throw the bar on my side. Even scarier is when this happens alone in the basement "home-gym". One day they're gonna find my week old stinking body squashed like a sqaurrel. Sorry about the profanity I just had a very bad workout and I needed to get some of it off my chest. It's nice to have friends like you who is listening ;-) ------------------ IP: Logged |
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DreamingBig Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 54) |
posted February 08, 2000 05:23 PM
That's some good shit ASSFACE. I liked all of them and can relate to those asking you shit in the middle of a workout (or set for that matter). DreamingBig IP: Logged |
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devrimbal Amateur Bodybuilder (Total posts: 24) |
posted February 08, 2000 05:23 PM
Hey ASSFACE, I just wanted to apologise for the above and thank you for your advice on my post. I have stinking pain in my shoulders, even typing or turning the steering wheel is killing me. I'm gonna give up completely watching on what I'm eating. I'm planning to eat what ever my body pleases, Be it burgers, motzerella, kentucky fried chicken, hot dogs. Heck, I'm not doing any roids and this carefull eating plan, low fat high fiber and protein is killing me. I got no energy left. This sunday I ordered 10 piece crispy chicken from KFC but I had no bread. And I could eat only 8 pieces and that didn't give me any energy. ------------------ IP: Logged |
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