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Author | Topic: Getting divorced....... | ||
Elite Bodybuilder ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 1106 |
I know this topic is probably meant for the chat board, this board is where I have spent the most time for the last year, so bear with me.After five and a half years of marriage, I am getting a divorce.I never thought I would ever have to go through this, my parents did, so it was the last thing I thought would happen to me.We have been having problems for the last 2 years, I think we just grew too far apart.Our work schedules havent helped the situation.We talked the other day and both decided that a divorce would be the best thing for both of us.I never realized how bad this would hurt, I will always love my wife or ex-wife, but right now I dont feel like i'm in love with her, I dont know if that makes much sense, not a whole lot makes sense here latley.We are going to remain friends after all is said and donr and she is letting me stay here until I find another apartment.At least there are no kids involved, then it would be a lot harder on everyone.It's gonna be hard getting use to living alone again, and hard to leave the good times behind.I guess I'm about to embark on a new chapter in my life, wish me well.Sorry to have taken up the boards space with a personal matter, I just had to get it off my chest, they say time heals,I hope so, cause it hurts like hell now...... ------------------ Anger is a gift...Zack(RATM) ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Elite Bodybuilder ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 1076 |
Sorry to hear that bad brains. I've been married 5 years so I can only imagine what you're going through. My wife and I are going through the same thing (drifting apart) Problem is we have 2 kids. Anyways good luck. Time will heal. I will say you're lucky bastard! hehe ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Moderator ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 587 |
One thing I have learned after being married for 10 years, divorced, and then re-married is that love is something you have to work on. People hurt each other on a daily basis sometimes and instead of fixing it right when it happens, you slowly get hard, numb, and unfeeling toward that person. It happens over an extended amount of time and then you wake up one day and it is too late. Feelings are gone and there's no way to go back and fix it. My best advice is take care of things as it happens, good or bad. Love is not always lost though. It's not a feeling, it's a committment and something you have to work at. I would say that it is not too late if the two of you are willing to work at it and that may mean giving up some things to put the other first again. If you don't feel it is worth it, then maybe it is time to move on. But don't think for one second that just because you have ended this relationship that the same problem will not crop up in the next one. It never fails. You can work it out with your wife of 5 years or you can try to work it out later with someone new. Maybe it is Murphy's Law, who knows, but a divorce never ends the existing problem. Sorry to sound so confusing. I am just going through the same thing myself. TG ------------------ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Pro Bodybuilder ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 358 |
Know exactly what it feels like and it is the worst in the world! I couldn't sleep, I couldn't focus on anything, I couldn't do anything. I was clinically obsessed and depressed. The only thing I did was run because it lifted my spirits, kind of became Forest Gump, (so I recommend it highly -outdoors)and drink at night cause it numbed the pain. I had to move far away(out of state) and that was hard as hell, the whole time she was with someone I knew- she was my high school sweetheart. Being away and time made it go away for the most part and meeting someone else special will definitely help so I would get on that asap as well! We are all suckers when it comes to real love and lost so don't think we are wimps here we are just human. On a good note this is the girl who is now my fiance and things are pretty good. So keep a positive outlook as much as you can!!!!!!!!! ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Cool Novice ![]() ![]() Posts: 26 |
Texas G. is right on the money. We let things build over time and don't talk when we should because we are big tough guys. Then like he said one day its to late. I was married 16 yrs. when my woman left me. I know how you are feeling right now as do many other bros. Things will get better with time. If you ever need to talk feel free to e-mail me. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Freak ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 1691 |
I dated a girl for 3 years and we split up. It was soooo wierd. I had all this time on my hands, had to sleep alone. Just be strong and hang in their. I was so tempted to call her an get back together cause being single and alone was so wierd. I didn't, I went fishing everyday, bought some new CD's and lived it up. Now I am not single anymore, but I kind of miss it. ------------------ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Amateur Bodybuilder ![]() ![]() Posts: 97 |
Sorry to hear that bro. The best thing to do is to try and stay positive. I know it will be hard at first but I believe everything happens for a reason. Sometimes something terrible happens to us only to turn out positive. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Pro Bodybuilder ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 532 |
I responded on the AF board bro. Later, ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Pro Bodybuilder ![]() ![]() ![]() Posts: 381 |
Hang in there bro. I wonder if you shouldn't just separate for a while. It could be possible for you and your wife to work things out. 5 years isn't a very long time. It is a fact that married couples fall in and out of love during their marriages. It's the hard times that requires the most work. Good luck. ------------------ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() | ||
Cool Novice ![]() ![]() Posts: 24 |
I'd have to agree with Bigguns, 5 years isn't very long. If you both still love each other, but just aren't IN LOVE with one another, maybe some time apart will help. If not it'll at least give you time to find out for sure whether you were meant to be or not. It won't be easy, and you'll never be completely over it, but in time you'll learn to deal with it and move on. Good luck bro. DOBB ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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