Thats some funny ass shit Jeremy.. especially the part about having to smell your own ass on the rev hypers...
I've done the same thing with the pants before.. luckily my boxers didnt tear..
I was working at the movie theatre back when I was 18, and was carrying two tables, one on each shoulder to the carpet so the floor could get waxed, squatted down to put em there, and RRRRRRRRRIIIIIPPPP... My pants ripped from my balls to the belt line... I'm glad I only had 10 minutes left in my shift... Funniest thing was, 2 years later I was late for my job with the government, and I grabbed the first pair of pants I could see.. Just happened to be the torn ones... Wore them till 2:30 in the afternoon without realizing my ass was hanging out all over the office for the last 5 hours.... I GOT RAZZED for that at work..
LOL..