Turd Ferguson
New member
Being an American , we have to know the many methods of self defense that are available for americans to deal with the scourge of the criminally poor. It's actually on the test. Since Seashell brought up the roller blading figure skater... I thought I may want to clear up some of the misconceptions and questions you all may have had.
First, when useing Figure skateing for self defense it is important to know your legal liability. No need for getting sued for triple toe looping someones balls. If confronted with a 'situation' you are legally obligated to 1.) Scream the name of Dorthy Hamil prior to any use of the method. 2.) keep your skates conceled untill your left with no other choice. 3.) Try to retreat 4.) You must put on some type of leotard and way too skimpy outfit that mimics skin tone. Or if your a guy your pants must also be skin tight and you must display some type of bulge where a penis used to be before you started skating.
Secondly, When useing skating as a deadly force, in most cases a single sow cow is more than enough to severly incapacitate your opponent. Very rarely is the double actually used in combat. Some cases the meare sight of skates and the outfit is enough to send your combatant packing
Just thought I'd clear this up.
First, when useing Figure skateing for self defense it is important to know your legal liability. No need for getting sued for triple toe looping someones balls. If confronted with a 'situation' you are legally obligated to 1.) Scream the name of Dorthy Hamil prior to any use of the method. 2.) keep your skates conceled untill your left with no other choice. 3.) Try to retreat 4.) You must put on some type of leotard and way too skimpy outfit that mimics skin tone. Or if your a guy your pants must also be skin tight and you must display some type of bulge where a penis used to be before you started skating.
Secondly, When useing skating as a deadly force, in most cases a single sow cow is more than enough to severly incapacitate your opponent. Very rarely is the double actually used in combat. Some cases the meare sight of skates and the outfit is enough to send your combatant packing
Just thought I'd clear this up.
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