Newbie, need help and ? for the Guys

[angel_eyes]

Hello Everyone, have been reading posts for about a month and just now registered. Mostly due to the MalintRED (?) posts, what remarkable work.

Alright, this is my problem. Have never really exercised consistently mostly to just maintain weight. I gained 40 lbs from some medication. I lost it all through diet and exercise over the past 7 months.

I have my ideal weight and clothing size back except my body looks like a mess. Have stretch marks everywhere, and major saddle bags and cellulite on thighs and butt. I am 5'4 and 125 lbs, would guess my body fat is 28%, maybe more. People tell me I look great, I take my clothes off and don't feel that way.

Need as much help as I can get on overcoming extra body fat. Have been doing alternate cardio 45-60 mins 3-4 times a week, and lifting weights 2-3 times a week. Diet is no sugar, dairy, refined foods, and mostly vegetarian. On weekends I treat myself to grilled fish and other foods in moderation. Any ideas??

***question for the guys*** If you are a major hard body, would someone with my "flaws" and everyday body type be a major turnoff??? I get more than my share of male attention, and never have had any complaints. I have never dated someone that was so buff, this is making me insecure. What do you think??

Thanks in advance for your advice

 

[Big Buck]

my girl doesn't work out...she's naturally thin, and runs occasionally. It's just personal preference.

 

[tripleV]

i would increase your protein intake and also train more on weights than cardio. I believe that with cardio, you can only go so far as being "skinny fat". You need to rid the body fat and gain lean muscle tissue.

Stretch marks and cellulite...well that you gotta live with although you can diminish it some.

 

[new@gettinbig]

You need to really focus on Lifting weights...it should be your main concern...Forget about what guys like or prefer....get your body in shape!! A tone hard body is ideal. I would get w/ a trainer and get on a good program and being from there...cardio is good and important but your training is more important. Diet needs lots of protein....Do you not like meat or any reason for not eating it?? It helps! You should be eating 5-6 meals a day...post a sample of what you eat in a day. And how you are training...

 

[Phemomena]

hey..
welcome to the boards.. congrats on you're progress thus far

i'm not a big expert on stretch marks, from my understanding these things take time and a clean diet...

if you are able to, get more protein... whey protein, egg whites and soy are good if you aren't a meat eater...

drink tons of water too...

and get in there and lift heavy... if you want to date someone that's buff, showing that you're strong and confident in the weight room is probably a start... most guys who take care of themselves like girls who do the same... but new's right, do it for you... not for someone else, only way its going to be worthwhile and lasting...

 

[Phemomena]

oh, and reds a great gal... her progress is very motivational for me personally, i'm glad she's got you on here... i'm sure you'll love it here...

 

[angel_eyes]

Thanks for the great support. Do not worry I am totally doing it for myself.

Have been lifting, just not enough. Will try to start a regular program. Just want to be toned and firm.

True, have not been eating enough. I enjoy meat, just trying to eat as healthy as possible. Have been eating only whole grain carbs and stay away from starchy veggies. I do drink plenty water.

Normal food intake sample would be:

Breakfast-Carb Solutions High Protein Bar

Lunch-large green salad with chicken, or just veggies

Dinner-whole wheat low carb tortilla with soy cheese

About a gallon of water a day, weekends sometimes cheat and have a small scoop of ice cream or other foods in moderation.

Thanks again everyone

 

[BigEasy]

Can't speak for other guys, but....

Don't worry about what average guys will think, you don't want Mr. Average anyway. Besides, it's not so much how you look, it's how you package and display what you have. If you act shamed by your looks and try to hide your body, then your body language will be shouting I'M UGLY!!!

On the other hand, if you are healthy, fit, and comfortable with who you are, you will exude confidence and be quite attractive. This is true with most guys that I know. We don't tend to focus on deficiencies if you don't. I guess it's the old stress the positives Pollyanna type thing. Most normal, well adjusted adults do not enjoy focusing on negative things or being around negative people for long. Our psyche is the same ans if we have a negative self image, it will permeate our subconscious and be broadcast to others.

So fix what you can, be the best you can given your genetics, age, and general health. The be happy that you ARE the best you can be, or are working towards it. THAT attitude is FAR more attractive than any flesh or fat stretched over bone could EVER be. Remember, any guy that does not value your determination and hard work is too superficial to matter anyway. Go find some contemplative nerd with a working brain, then teach him how to lift, if need be. You are obviously too literate to accept second best without a fight.

Most guys DO NOT notice detail like women do. If we did, Barbara Streisand would have NEVER made it into the movies or as a sex symbol. Same with Bette Middler. Both of these women were confident about who they were and just went on. They knew that some people would like them, no matter what; and that others would not like them, no matter what. So they just gravitated towards those that appreciated them, and away from those that didn't appreciate them for who they were.

 

[Phemomena]

eat more food.. clean food... don't be afraid of complex carbs like sweet potatoes, red potatos, oatmeal, brown rice etc.. these are a huge source of energy for your muscles... more energy to the muscles means being able to lift more weights...

and you may want to break your meals down into smaller portions and eat more frequently during the day... its a hard thing to do, but your body will thank you... and get more protein..

 

[new@gettinbig]

You are totally UNDER EATING!!!! You need more food...more often throughout your day! at least 4-6 oz of some sort of meat and a veggie...or egg whites...a shake..and bars...only take in bars and shakes for emergencies..real food is BEST!

 

[angel_eyes]

Big Easy, thank you for being eloquent enough to state how I already feel about myself 99% of the time.

I was feeling uncomfortable after the huge weight gain from medication I was taking. Now that I have worked to get rid of it, I guess there was some lingering doubt left.

This is probably the main reason why I attract so many men naturally. I have been told my intelligence, personality, and natural beauty make men suffer and obsess for me. (I honestly do not know why) I just consider myself an average gal and do not obsess about what can not be fixed.

Again, thank you. Your reply should be framed and kept by all women.

 

[Hannibal]

***question for the guys*** If you are a major hard body, would someone with my "flaws" and everyday body type be a major turnoff??? I get more than my share of male attention, and never have had any complaints. I have never dated someone that was so buff, this is making me insecure. What do you think??

Well angel_eyes...this is just my opinion and probably does not pertain to anyone else. There are so many things to a woman that makes them attractive. And what you see as "flaws", being your own worst critic, might not be seen the same by members of the opposite sex. I personally am more attracted to the way a woman carries herself...and her personality than physical dimensions. Don't get me wrong, the initial attraction is almost always physical...hard to "see" a woman's personality from across the room. But after that...a healthy relationship is based on much more than that...I would hope. If a man cannot accept you for who you are...then find another man. If you change just to please him you will be lyin to yourself. Besides a woman with "angel eyes" is a thing of beauty

 

[Sassy69]

"Stretch marks" - just say your body has had to adjust itself to accomodate your greater than average number of attributes! This would imply that the woman with "perfect skin" probably is a great package, but nuthin but a box of air inside... LOL!

 

[angel_eyes]

I am staying on this board for good now, everyone here is great!!

 

[Flexx]

EAT MORE!!!!!!!! especially protein, enough said about that. I agree with those before me. Yes, I am shallow enough to admit that the initial attraction is physical. I have learned from experience that those who are beautiful on the outside are usually ugly on the inside. I know there are some exceptions (me for example ) But after the initial atrraction if I don't like what you have to offer as a person I have no interest. We guys might actually suprise you by not being completly superficial. Bottom line is do this for yourself not because you want to attract a certain type of person. You omitted one stat, age? Good luck with your goals angel eyes. Learn from these knowledgeable gals around here. Us guys will be more than happy to tell you what we look for in a woman. You already sound like you have one of the most important ingredients, a positive attitude.


ps
Yes I am a moajor hardbody, at least that's the lie I hear when I go out. Like you I tend to see an ordinary person when I look at myself.

 

[angel_eyes]

Thanks again for all the advise everyone has been generous enough to offer. This is really helping me keep motivated.

For the past few days I have tried eating more and finding it extremely difficult. I am eating smaller meals and adding snacks. It is making me feel really like my stomach is really bloated. I have been drinking as much water as possible, more than a gallon a day.

**Any help on what a daily meal plan should consist of would be really helpful for me. I am 30 years old, 5'5 and 125lbs. My goal is to not be "skinny fat" I need to loose body fat and let the muscle I have show.

I am going to get my exact body fat measured sometime next week and will let you know. I hate to say that it is probably 25-28% I really have no clue.

I realize when I look in the mirror, I am being my own worst critic. I receive compliments daily on my overall appearance. Because I can fit in a size 2-4 does not make me overall fit. Try explaining that to your friends. They constantly say I look too thin!!

Thank you for your replies and support.

 

[tripleV]

r u hitting the weights girl? you gotta expend the energy too. and if you're stomach is feeling bloated, don't eat so much at one sitting. break it up, even if it means you eat 8 times or 10 times a day for now...i sometiems think i eat ALL day long!

 

[tripleV]

and i know how you feel about your appearance! we are all our worst critics. but you WILL get there no doubt! Then you will be proud to share your pics. BTW did you take pics to judge your progress. I think it's the best progress monitor.

 

[tripleV]

oh yeah, and i'm a size 10! we are all different sizes and prefer different looks!

 

[angel_eyes]

Thanks again for your advice. It is really appreciated.

I have been hitting the weights harder. I even do small things, such as carry hand weights up and down the stairs. When I get to the bottom, I will do one or two sets of biceps curls, or squats.

When I am at computer, I will focus and sitting up straight and pulling in my abs. I will also take five minute stretch periods here and there to remain flexible.

As far as food intake, I have been breaking it up. Just small portions 4-5 times a day. Still feel like I am eating too much.

 

[tripleV]

sounds like youre on the right track girl, keep it up...

 

[angel_eyes]

Thanks, Triple V if your a size 10, you must be tall and buff.

I am just 5'5 and 125 pounds right now, wearing a size 2-4. The one exception to my petite size, is my bone structure is really large. I do not look like a little a girl. I most definitely have a woman's body!! Except in the chest area. I am a small B which I love, no bra!!

This may be why people say I look too thin, because I am so big boned I appear 10-15lbs less than what I weight. Do you think this means I will be able to add more muscle mass
I sure hope it does.

Your advice is very encouraging and much appreciated.

Thank you,

 

[ironbarbarian]

***question for the guys*** If you are a major hard body, would someone with my "flaws" and everyday body type be a major turnoff??? I get more than my share of male attention, and never have had any complaints. I have never dated someone that was so buff, this is making me insecure. What do you think??

Thanks in advance for your advice

your lucky I decided to visit this forum(I only post in the anabolic and spanish boards), so I will answer your question:

I love girls with "everyday" body type. Love them. They are so cute and their skin is so smooth...But I also like and Love the girls that bust their asses in the gym. Love them too. I love everytype of girl. there is some sensuality in sedentary women that attracts me for some reason. And there is a carisma in women that have hard bodies that also attracts me. In conclusion, I dont give a shit if you workout or not, It does not affect me at all.

Hope this makes you feel better.

 

[angel_eyes]

Still interested in a recommended diet, and how much I can accept to gain with my body frame??

A specific diet would be great, any ideas??

Thank you to everyone who has replied, very encouraging and much appreciated.

 

[tripleV]

Thanks, Triple V if your a size 10, you must be tall and buff.

I am just 5'5 and 125 pounds right now, wearing a size 2-4.

actually i'm 5'6" and around 137-140 lbs! i think i'm pushing 145 now!

 

[tripleV]

specific diets...well spatterson posted hers not to long ago and she's got some heavy duty knowledge in that area, check out her post. Also , phemomena posted hers and i've posted lots about food etc...

just eat from a certain list of foods and make sure you eat enough really...

 

[angel_eyes]

Just bumping for more information

 

[rez]

hey angeleyes...phem amonst others have made helpful suggestions to me about diet exercise - we sound like we have similar bosy types. Im about 110pounds, and the last time I took my bf% (about 3-4wks ago) it was 23%. I am trying to decrease my bf% mainly through diet. I eat 6 times a day - a personal trainer gave me this eating plan. It may not suit you, but I have a very sensitive somach..and many foods I am unable to eat..so here goes:

post workout (meal 1):
soy low-carb protein shake
1 apple
1 orange

M2:
tuna
steamed pumpkin

M3:
chicken breast
steamed green vegetables ( zucchini/brocolli etc)

M4:
Egg white omellete (1 yolk)
salad

M5:
Grilled fish
steamed green vegetables

M6: low-carb, low-fat yoghurt.
Now I think this last meal is stupid! I prefer to have a small serve of low-fat cottage cheese, which is high in protein and low in carbs and fat. Seems to make more sense to me.


What do you think of it?
Its not always easy to eat like this especially if you work, or out etc. But there are always substitutes - just make sure you get protein with every meal.
Educate yourself on the protein-carb-fat ratio in foods you want to eat - makes a busy life easier.

 

[manny78]

Personally I dont like the female-bodybuilders type of body. Those girls on test who mostly look like males doesnt turn me on at all. Always dated slim feminine girls. Just my 0.02

 

[cobratri]

Don't worry about it, like Manny said, I don't like the female bodybuilder type either.

 

[da big thinker]

don't like female bbers but fitness girls are HOT...but it all comes down to personality...my 0.02$

 

[angel_eyes]

****UPDATE BODY FAT TEST****

OK, had b/f tested today. 5'5 125 pounds and 25% bodyfat.
This sounds too high for me??

What would you suggest for a "normal" fit body fat percentage to be around?? I am just looking to add muscle and lose the skinnyfat.

Any ideas??