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Accelerator jammed at 135mph on an R-reg BMW 318
Kevin Nicolle was at the controls of said vehicle on the A1 near Thirsk in North Yorkshire, England, when the car started to accelerate - and not at his behest. What followed will chill the hearts of all members of the neoLuddite Resistance Army (NRA): a 60-mile, 135mph dash down the hard shoulder, police helicopter in hot pursuit while Mr Nicolle frantically attempted to bring the Todesauto back under human control.
Nicolle explained: "I was travelling down the motorway and I came to traffic in front of me. I took my foot off the accelerator because it's automatic - but I wasn't slowing down at all. "I hit the brakes. They were braking ok, they were keeping me at about 70mph. So I phoned up the police after I called the AA and they said straight away 'stick your hazard lights on and headlights on - we've got a helicopter en route to you'."
Nicolle attempted unsuccessfully to stick the Beemer in neutral, but found the gears jammed. "Then the brakes started burning out - I could see smoke coming from the brakes," he said. After 60 miles - during which Nicolle was in constant contact with the police on his hands-free - his options ran out. Approaching a roundabout near Blyth he saw there were "a load of cars parked waiting to go onto the roundabout, so I went on the inside on the hard shoulder to try to get around it. "But doing that sort of speed there was no chance and I hit the roundabout head on. I remember the 999 lady saying 'he's crashed'."
The car quickly ensured that any investigation into the cause of the ordeal would be made as difficult as possible - by duly bursting into flames. Nicolle admitted: "I survived the accident but I thought I was going to die in the fire."
Police duly towed away the car and "BMW said they would carry out a full investigation". We all know what that means; a suspicion confirmed by BMW's UK media relations manager, Duncan Forrester, who said: "I would certainly like to reassure anybody driving any BMW that we see this as really nothing more than a freak accident. We have absolutely no record of anything such as this happening in the past, hence the reason why we want to take a close look at it."
Regular monitors of the Rise of the Machines™ will find these words spine-tinglingly familiar. Back in 2004, an incident during which a Renault Vel Satis subjected a sobbing Frenchman to an hour-long, 125mph involuntary speed trial, provoked the firm's CEO Louis Schweitzer to declare: "Every time there is an incident like this, we have to look into it on the principle of basic precaution. But the way this has been described to me, I find it very surprising and most unlikely."
For the record, Nicolle survived the impact with the roundabout unscathed. He is unsurprisingly considering giving up driving altogether.
Kevin Nicolle was at the controls of said vehicle on the A1 near Thirsk in North Yorkshire, England, when the car started to accelerate - and not at his behest. What followed will chill the hearts of all members of the neoLuddite Resistance Army (NRA): a 60-mile, 135mph dash down the hard shoulder, police helicopter in hot pursuit while Mr Nicolle frantically attempted to bring the Todesauto back under human control.
Nicolle explained: "I was travelling down the motorway and I came to traffic in front of me. I took my foot off the accelerator because it's automatic - but I wasn't slowing down at all. "I hit the brakes. They were braking ok, they were keeping me at about 70mph. So I phoned up the police after I called the AA and they said straight away 'stick your hazard lights on and headlights on - we've got a helicopter en route to you'."
Nicolle attempted unsuccessfully to stick the Beemer in neutral, but found the gears jammed. "Then the brakes started burning out - I could see smoke coming from the brakes," he said. After 60 miles - during which Nicolle was in constant contact with the police on his hands-free - his options ran out. Approaching a roundabout near Blyth he saw there were "a load of cars parked waiting to go onto the roundabout, so I went on the inside on the hard shoulder to try to get around it. "But doing that sort of speed there was no chance and I hit the roundabout head on. I remember the 999 lady saying 'he's crashed'."
The car quickly ensured that any investigation into the cause of the ordeal would be made as difficult as possible - by duly bursting into flames. Nicolle admitted: "I survived the accident but I thought I was going to die in the fire."
Police duly towed away the car and "BMW said they would carry out a full investigation". We all know what that means; a suspicion confirmed by BMW's UK media relations manager, Duncan Forrester, who said: "I would certainly like to reassure anybody driving any BMW that we see this as really nothing more than a freak accident. We have absolutely no record of anything such as this happening in the past, hence the reason why we want to take a close look at it."
Regular monitors of the Rise of the Machines™ will find these words spine-tinglingly familiar. Back in 2004, an incident during which a Renault Vel Satis subjected a sobbing Frenchman to an hour-long, 125mph involuntary speed trial, provoked the firm's CEO Louis Schweitzer to declare: "Every time there is an incident like this, we have to look into it on the principle of basic precaution. But the way this has been described to me, I find it very surprising and most unlikely."
For the record, Nicolle survived the impact with the roundabout unscathed. He is unsurprisingly considering giving up driving altogether.