Describe the funniest dirty sex acts you know? Dirty Sanchez, Blumpkin, etc.??

[Jax]

For Dirty Sanchez/six pack descriptions, refer to Winny Fan's warm welcome given to HelenSL:

http://boards.elitefitness.com/forum/showthread.php?threadid=42634

A blumpkin is I believe when you are dropping a deuce and find it in your heart to let a lucky girl bob the knob simultaneously. Just say the fucking word 'blumpkin'...it's HILARIOUS

 

[WODIN]

Funniest....The Flying Camel...

Capitain Insano should explain this..it's his baby..

 

[Jax]

never heard about the camel...! Hook me up. Also, what the fuck is an angry dragon?

 

[satanic goatslayer]

Bleeding Uterus

While having sex in the missionary position, pull out and grab your icepick. Penetrate, then pull it out and stab her in the lower abdomen, working your way up.

I've got too much, clap clap, time on my hands.

 

[WarriorPL]

Jax,


The Flying Camel
A personal favourite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her on your knees, you very carefully move forward and prop yourself (without using your arms) on your dick while it is still inserted in her vertical seafood taco. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long shrieking howl, much like a flying camel.
Strictly a classy move.


The Angry Dragon
Immediately after you blow your load in a girl's mouth, smack the back of her head and make it come out her nose. When she gets up, she'll look like an angry dragon.

 

[HelenSL]

Jax,


The Flying Camel
A personal favourite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her on your knees, you very carefully move forward and prop yourself (without using your arms) on your dick while it is still inserted in her vertical seafood taco. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long shrieking howl, much like a flying camel.
Strictly a classy move.

Who told you this was classy? The man holding the camera who told you how to do it?

uh-huh

love
helen

 

[Jax]

jesus wizkid, that's hilarious! I know there's one more I wanted to know, just can't think of it....

 

[Body]

The Rusty Trombone:

Stand Up with your girlfriend behind you licking your asshole as she reaches around and jerks you off.

 

[maple_leaf_m27]

Rodeo f**k

Thats where you enter her from behind doggie style and whisper in her ear that her sister is much better in bed then she is and try to hang on for 8 seconds

 

[thefantom1]

Lets not forget the "Donkey Punch" this works great if you are having anal sex in the doggie style position...just when you are about to cum... you punch her right in the back of the head.......... causing her to tense up as cum in her ass............. Girls love this one........

 

[Jax]

bismark, chili dog?

 

[supergirl]

i think thesalami is the pro at these.. just ask him.. he is like a dirty deed dictionary!!

 

[TheSalami]

thanks supergirl, im very proud of my knowledge of the sexual acts that you dont read about in the karma sutra. i really only recently heard about the blumpkin on the howard stern show and i fell in love with it. i wonder if i can also read a magazine while getting one.

 

[The Almighty]

I GOT THE BEST ONE...

The Jelly Doughnut

When you are doing her from behind, right before you cum you take your dick out and then spit on her back. She, thinking you came, will turn around. You then shoot your load onto her face and punch her in the nose.

The red blood and white cum=jelly doughnut